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parma42

OK, now I have a strange neighbor.

16 years ago

Spring must bring out the wackos.

At around 5:30 yesterday, DH and I were in our garage after doing some garden and patio planning. A 50ish (same as us) woman walked up our driveway. After making some small talk, she asked if she could use our garbage can. It seems like a plastic bag had become entwined in the branches of one of our roadway trees and she wanted to throw it out. She said the tree was in bud and it could harm it. So far, so good, even though it was apparent that we were being lectured.

She then began a rant about people who litter, saying that she goes to the small neighborhood park and picks up after all the mothers who just make a mess with their kids. DH is getting bored by now. We thank her and she goes on her way.

After getting back to our sidewalk, she walks a few feet west and starts examining out next-door neighbor's yard. A minute later she spies something on the ground, picks it up and marches to their front door and rings the bell. I can only imagine what she told them. This is a woman (the neighbor) who has the most beautiful gardens and always keeps her yard in a pristine state. DH is quite anal about our lot, too.

By the time we went inside, I was just muttering "She rang their doorbell." , over and over.

Oh, did I mention that the western burbs of Chicago had hail storms with 50 mph winds, yesterday? We had so much hail beat down in the morning, that even with the temps reaching the high 70s, there was a pile of it that hadn't thawed by the afternoon, that had come from our downspout. I'm sure she had plenty to pick from at the time that most were just starting to get home from work. At least she didn't have a trumpet, lol.

What would you say to someone who knocked on your door after finding a small piece of whatever in your yard?

Comments (29)

  • 16 years ago

    What would you say to someone who knocked on your door after finding a small piece of whatever in your yard?

    Do you really want to know? Well, there are two words. And the second word is "off." ;-D

    That's just nuts. We've had incredibly high winds in our area too these past few days, and stuff is flying everywhere. I think the neighbors will soon learn to put Woodsy the Owl on ignore.

  • 16 years ago

    LOL, the cheek of some people. This woman apparently has some screws loose. I'm in total agreement with auntjen on this one. It's YOUR property, and how you take care of it is YOUR business! 'Nuff said!

  • 16 years ago

    LOL Jen!

  • 16 years ago

    Eeegads...talk about boundary disorder.

    If it only happened once, I suppose I would try to just laugh about it. Of course, my brain would be churning over a comeback for the next time.

  • 16 years ago

    I would try to give her the benefit of the doubt. It is possible that she has some type *condition* or disability. Of course she could always just be *different*. We are in the country and do not have close neighbors, but a woman down from us has shown up here and there - she has alzheimers. Not saying your neighbor does, just that you never know . . .

    We've had TWO roofs (and our house is only 11 years old) put on due to hail damage. I hate that stuff!!

    tina

  • 16 years ago

    Parma, can you sneak out every night after dark and put a plastic bag in the branches of your street-side shrubs? Change the location every night. It'll give the busybody gal something to do. (evil grin ;) )

  • 16 years ago

    Well I have no idea what she said when she rang the door bell, but if she said something similar to what she did to you guys I'd just thank her and say the wind must be blowing stuff around and that is very nice of her to pick up trash in the park etc. Then I'd shrug my shoulders and think she was a little different than your average person.

    We have a neighbor that picks stuff up daily when she's out walking. I think it is wonderful of her to do that. We are rural and the county road entrance to our subdivision is very secluded and seems to be a dumping ground for other peoples trash. It would look horrible if others didn't help. Of course she never says she does it to anybody, but I've seen her do it and thanked her for doing it when I ran into her a few months ago.

  • 16 years ago

    Please, we must hear the end of the story. Ask your neighbor what the crazy lady picked up and what she said at the door.

    I'm a garbage picker-upper, so I don't find her litter picking up all that strange.

  • 16 years ago

    That is funny. Maybe she can come by my house and pick up the poop the neighbor's dog places on our side of our shared grassy area between our houses. Would save my dh time flicking it back over to her side.

    I agree with you that it was a little weird but agree also that she may be fixed on that being her thing to do. If she knocked on my door I too would thank her and mention how other people's stuff always floats to my yard and send her on her way. Also, sticking another bag out there is sooooo tempting to do but.....

    The other morning my dh told me that the neighbor who lives at end of culdesac was picking weeds out of two other neighbors rock bed which are between the lots. It does bug me that neither picks the tall weeds out, especially the one who is at home all day, but I did find it really rude. But these are the folks that we call The CC&R Czars because they always try to tell others what to do. But when one house was vacant they did mow the lawn a few times to keep things nice, so they mean well. Some folks are wacky but I do think most times they mean well.

  • 16 years ago

    She sounds lonely. I would be respectful and compassionate. Personally I'd rather be door to doored with real garbage than door to doored with the leaflet garbage I get slipped under my door by well meaning soul savers.

  • 16 years ago

    You may have hit the nail on the head Goldie - I don't understand why she is being referred to as wacko and crazy.

    tina

  • 16 years ago

    I think she sounds sort of lonely, but then, I talk to everyone on the planet about whatever comes into my head. The ringing the bell endlessly seems a little off, but who knows? Maybe she knows those people, and does it all the time.

    Maybe she found a $100 bill and was returning it. I like to think there's some great story here, rather than she found dog poop.

  • 16 years ago

    "Please, we must hear the end of the story. Ask your neighbor what the crazy lady picked up and what she said at the door."

    I kind of tried...

    I did go back out and chatted her up a bit, as she was weeding her side garden. Think she might have been out back and her husband answered/didn't answer the door.

    Problem is, they're from Poland and I have a terrible time understanding accents that aren't from a Romance language. Most of my contribution to our conversations is an embarrassing "Pardon?" . DH has no communication problem, at all. Darn.

    My biggest beefs are the intrusive nature of the doorbell ringing (as long as I'm outside, I'd just chalk it up to overexuberance) and the lecturing nature. She didn't introduce herself, doesn't know us, so how can she assume that we're litterbugs?

  • 16 years ago

    I'm with tinam61 & golddust on this one -- some compassion is in order. Something is a little off with this woman, so her actions & words shouldn't be met with hostility.

    On the other hand, it could be nice to have someone in the neighborhood on guard for the stray bits of trash, off her rocker or not. I'm amazed at how much trash finds its way onto our street and surrounding woods. I think much of it blows out of the back of passing garbage trucks, and some of it is from teens tossing out their beer cans & liquor bottles after an evening of partying. There's always a need for litter to be picked up here.

  • 16 years ago

    I'm thinking this is, at least in part, a cultural thing now that you've mentioned she is from Poland. As you know there are LOTS of Poles in the Chicago area, and rapidly growing populations from other Eastern European counties in more recent years, but the Polish communities are well established. The neighbors we have from that part of Europe are lovely people and very concerned with things being *In Order* including their children who are far more polite than other kids in the area. If you drive through some of the older Polish neighborhoods in the city you'll see homes and yards, neat as a pin, block after block. No sidewalk goes unswept! That's a huge generalization, I know, but it does hold true much of the time.

    There could be an element of 'wackiness' of one kind or another but I'm willing to bet her intentions are good although her delivery is harsh to our ears. Unless it becomes frequent and scary, I'd let her do her thing, listen to her and thank her for caring.

  • 16 years ago

    As I read it, the neighbor is Polish, not the crazy lady.

    But I totally agree on the Polish-being-neat thing. I have memories of the family piling out of the car and heading to the house, only to have my mother re-direct me (the youngest) to run to the side of the yard and pick up a stray piece of paper. I hated doing it, but just yesterday I found myself running around my block picking up stray pieces of newspaper blown from someone's recycling bin. (And I thought bad thoughts about the lady across the street for ignoring them.)

  • 16 years ago

    I don't know what I would say...that's a first I've ever heard of anyone doing that! Ha!

    We got that hair too Parma! I was driving on the freeway when it started and had to pull off and stop because it was so bad. It was deafening and I thought for sure it was going either leave dings in my car or crack the window! Worst hail I've ever been in!

  • 16 years ago

    I hope everyone realizes I was joking when I said what I did about my two-word response. I would never actually say that. I'd be as polite as humanly possible to her face, but I might think it.

  • 16 years ago

    Graywings is correct. The next-door neighbor is from Poland. She keeps an immaculate yard and that's why it was so strange to see anyone picking anything up and taking it to her front door.

  • 16 years ago

    I'd cut her some slack.. at least someone is picking the trash up. I have to admit that I'm the one on my block that picks most of the trash up within a few houses; even in front of others houses. Yesterday we were driving up the street & I saw a bottle I've been meaning to stop & pick up the next time I drove by it. The bottle is in front of a neighbors house & has been for the last week. My peeve is the people who obviously see the trash because they walk by it (it was right by their mailbox) but don't stop to pick it up.

    If I'm reading the 1st post right; the tree that the bag was in is one of yours? It's possible what she really wanted to say was why didn't you pick it up.. I'm just guessing by the things you wrote. Sounds like she was side-stepping actually coming out & saying it.

    As far as knocking on someone's door.. that's over the line; I would never do anything like that. I know that everyone has a life; heck with what I just went through; my snow should never have been shoveled; let alone worrying about garbage on my lawn & I don't doubt other neighbors can be in the same boat with busy lives or health issues I don't know about.

    If I choose to pick garbage up; I'm going to pick it up & get on my way. At least I can feel good that I did something to keep trash off of my street.

  • 16 years ago

    oops - skimming again - gets me into trouble every time!

  • 16 years ago

    I've been known to pull weeds at the edge of one of my neighbors driveway, but don't think anyone has witnessed it. They're a younger couple, no kids, and are never home, so do very little to the house or the yard~they'll eventually get a letter from the HOA. Everyone in the neighborhood wishes they would move as they're a 'strange fit' in a place with mostly families or retirees.

    I've also picked up debris if I see it on a yard/sidewalk, and bring it home and put it in the trash or recycle bin. I would never ring the door bell and 'make a complaint'~that takes a lot of chutzpah' ;o)

  • 16 years ago

    Well, I'd be thinking, "Kiss my grits you little witch!" But would say, "Why you sweet little thing! How nice of you to let me know how things have fallen into disarray. My dh & I were about to have a snack. Would you care to join us for some tea & cookies?"

    This kind of behavior has an underlying explanation. Usually a sad one. My obsessive compulsive neighbor, I believe, does yard work until the cows come home to make herself feel better about herself, not her yard. Your lady, I'd being willing to wager, is lonely or/and lacking purpose in her life. Arm chair psychologist's take on it.

    It's tough to be on the receiving end of others' neurosis.

  • 16 years ago

    Arm chair psychologist's take on it.

    I'd have to agree. ;)

    The work I do in my yard has nothing to do with making me feel better about myself. It's about creating a habitat for wildlife, food for the table, and natural beauty for anyone to enjoy.

  • 16 years ago

    Hmm. I once had a neighbor who did similar odd things. Collecting thistles and leaving them on the porch if she was annoyed at you for some imagined or unknown offense was a favorite. In a brief conversations she seemed fine. On some topics she was even quiet bright. Alas, Dr. X (yes, she was an M.D.) was in a serious car accident not too long after she started practicing medicine. Her brain was damaged. She doesn't function well enough to do any kind of work, drive, handle her own finance, etc. She's been like this for 25-30 years. Dealing with her was exasperating, but it wasn't her fault.

  • 16 years ago

    Auntjen, I knew you were saying that tongue in cheek, just as my response was! I've never been able to be rude to anyone, in spite of how I may feel internally about them. It's just not my nature. But that doesn't stop me from thinking that there must be something not quite right with someone who would walk through a neighborhood, picking up trash, and then lecturing homeowners about what she finds in their yard. I volunteer for a roadside trash cleanup in our neighborhood each month, and we pick up trash alongside the highway. I wouldn't dream of walking up to someone's house while doing this, and lecturing them on what was collected. We just do this as a community service.

  • 16 years ago

    This morning as I was leaving my house, I noticed weeds on the sidewalk in front of the house I mentioned. Guess there are others who wish some neighbors would 'keep up with the Joneses' when it comes to maintaining at least the front yard. ;o).

  • 16 years ago

    I once came home one fall day to find that my neighbor, while raking her yard, had placed neat piles of leaves all along my yard where it connected to hers. Her response: The leaves were from my tree! I think she thought she was doing us a favor.

  • 16 years ago

    On the subject of yards and littering, I think it's incredibly rude when neighbors use their blowers to blow their leaves and lawn clippings into the street and then leave it all there. It's as though they think that by blowing it off their property, they've cleaned up. Well, I guess they have cleaned up their own area, but littered the street - and probably their neighbors' yards - in the process. I just can't wrap my mind around why anyone would think that's an appropriate way to get rid of yard debris.

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