The issue is much greater than the saw and what the neighbor did, but I would chalk it up to lesson learned and NEVER loan him anything else again. And being me, I would go to efforts to avoid him too, however, I usually take the non confrontational route.

This is why we never borrow tools. We rent, if needed. We have no idea how well the tools have been taken care of and frankly, my DH is terrible when it comes to maintaining his tools. My father has likely rolled over in his grave several times...

I'd never borrow or loan a power tool without a prior agreement as to 'What if..."

Sounds like this neighbor is a classic bully, and he will huff and puff and blow up until he gets what he wants. But in the face of quiet confidence he'll likely whimper away... I think you did exactly the right thing, and I applaud your grit in doing it. Don't loan him anything else, and keep some distance between you...

Yep, repair or replace.

What broke on it? We've had a table saw for years and they don't just break.

I can't believe that the neighbor borrowed it to build a big fancy chicken coup and Playhouse, among other things! That takes a lot of nerve. It takes even more nerve to buy a new one and try to keep it at his house! He should have bought his own darn saw! By all means keep the new saw and never loan him anything again.

We don't borrow. Not tools, not cars, nothing of any real value or consequence and it's because we would absolutely be obligated to fully replace an item if we damaged or lost it. DH is in the building business and in the past when others have borrowed from him it's always a disaster so he just doesn't loan anything anymore.

Your neighbor is a piece of work. I'm willing to bet the next saw interaction will include his calling you (or most likely your hubby) and saying he's coming to pick up *his* saw for his next project and at that point you'll have to grab your bully cajones and tell him to back off, that he replaced your property that he had broken and he does not own this saw.

Just curious why the necessity to mention that he is "ex-military"? Does the fact that he is a retired "colonial" automatically make him a "bully"? My husband is also a retired "colonial" (that would actually be "colonel") and anything but a "bully". As are most of the military we know and have known over the years.

If he tries to borrow it again I would say "There was some "confusion" the last time you borrowed our saw and broke it so we prefer not to loan out our tools anymore.".

What a jerk.

If I were to borrow something and broke it, I would replace it immediately - and graciously.

A friend borrowed a finishing sander and her teenage son destroyed it, using it to round off corners on his project piece. She replaced it with the same model before even explaining what had happened but was clearly not happy about it - after all, she pointed out, the one they borrowed wasn't new and I was getting one brand new back, like I had somehow done something greedy by accepting a sander in working condition, I was the 'bad guy'.

If I had a multiple projects as described above and didn't want to buy my own table saw, I'd have sought out a rental. Try it, days accumulating on a rental contract is great for keeping us focused and on schedule.:)
Anytime someone offers the loan of something expensive, my first thought is if I could afford to replace if bad things happened to it.

funnygirl, my granddad was also a retired colonel -and certainly not a bully. I didn't consider the 'military' mention at all when I labeled him a bully. Just his behavior. Bullies come from all occupations: teachers, doctors, and yes, military.

If someone resents replacing an item they broke with a new item, that tells me something unfavorable about their personality.

First of all, I would never borrow anything. Ever.

Second, if I was sleep walking or possessed by some demon and borrowed something and broke it - the shame would be more than I could take. So would probably buy them a new car along with a new whatever it was that broke.

Third, I don't lend my stuff unless it's someone I trust and will forgive me if I lose my sh*t on them.

Funnygirl, First, sorry about the typo! Second, No it doesnâÂÂt automatically make him a bully. However, I felt that mentioning it would help one visualize a tougher sort of person who was maybe either taught to recognize a weaker opponent or is like that naturally. The man I speak of has issues outside of and not at all related to the Military. However join the two together and you get a picture of what I have been dealing with. I do not know your husband at all so of course this is not about him. IâÂÂm certainly not bashing the military since my son just finished six years of the Navy.
Luckily we are in the process of moving so we will not have to deal with neighbor anymore (but I will so miss my house). I canâÂÂt begin to tell you all the trouble neighbor has been with his head games. At one time my husband was having heart problems (he is now fixed). The neighbor was constantly trying to use my husband for labor, like, putting a roof on his shed right at the peck of Florida summer heatâ¦donâÂÂt even get me started on that as I will get furious all over again.
I thought I would post this because I just couldnâÂÂt believe he blew up (his words) the saw, bought a new one and then basically wanted to keep it. This is after husband told him our son offered to put us up until we find another home and we would need the saw to build a patio fence for the dogs.

I don't loan things out either. Like with money-I'd rather give it away as a gift than loan it and expect it back in the same condition (and in a timely manner).

My husband, however, will loan the shirt off his back-and it always bites him. We had a small utlity trailer that we rarely used and our neighbors borrowed it all the time. One neighbor did break something on it, and he had the grace to fix it to better than original condition, but he still came and picked it up whenever he pleased. Finally I told my H to just SELL him the stupid thing! That way if WE needed it, we could just borrow it. Well, he sold it to someone else and what do you know-neighbor bought himself one.

I think you keeping the saw is fine. If he 'blew it up' it's because he was not operating it properly and he overloaded it. Sorry you have to deal with this type of creep!

Hmmm, all this no borrowing, I just borrowed an animal trap from someone ( armadillo tearing up the yard) but if I break it, I would buy him a new one. I think it's safe though!

If I borrowed something and broke it, I'd replace it with a new one. And apologize profusely to the owner and probably bake them brownies. And never ask to borrow anything from them ever again.

I happily loan and cautiously borrow. He's a jerk.

Absolutely. you did the right thing. I really don't understand people like that.

Only thing I ever borrowed was a carpet cleaner from a good neighbor/friend when we were moving. It was definitely used and not well maintained (her DH isn't handy).

After we used it, my DH did a complete overhaul/tune up on the thing and we gave her the almost full gallon of cleaner I had bought. When we returned it she said, "gosh, you guys wanna borrow anything else?" :)

I don't borrow anything from anyone but in this case we needed to. Giving it back better/cleaner than when borrowed is the only way I could do it.

The saw story is unbelievable! Maintaining a good relationship with good neighbors is worth more than a stupid saw.

The funny thing is that the first time he broached the subject of him having a deal with my husband (lie) I just waved it off and said I know nothing of it and I just need the saw. Neighbor wasnâÂÂt going to be put off and he brought it up again but this time added that he needed to know otherwise he wanted HIS saw back. ThatâÂÂs when I said I didnâÂÂt understand what he was talking about and to just pretend that the saw was our original saw and IâÂÂm taking it back. He actually used the word HIS saw. Sheesh what a crack pot!
Pesky, I think our husbands are much alike. I wouldnâÂÂt trade mine for the world because he is so good and kind. So, I will be the bad guy (IâÂÂm a natural lol).

Funcolors: Does DH have an unmarried brother?

;)

Lending is a tricky thing.
You want to be helpful, but sometimes people aren't on the same page.

I'm currently "lending" space in my finished basement to my next-door neighbor, who's getting a contractor in to do some work and had to clear out a bunch of stuff (books, records, craft supplies -- years of stuff). So unless there's a freak water leak, I think it'll be fine. (I helped move her stuff and will move it back -- she's older than I am, and I don't want her doing it by herself. Plus, she does stuff for me, like rides to the airport.)

But, one time I needed an electric drill. My 10-year-old cordless died. I borrowed her drill -- one that was heavy! When they used to make them to be around for years. I did stress about "what if something happens to it." I'd be determined to find something of equal quality, and that would have been difficult.

Pammy; you should get something in writing; especially with all of these wacky storms we're having. The neighbor could easily go to a storage unit. You can bet most people would put a claim into your home owners.

Raising my hand! Had a neighbor that baby sat my daughter; she liked a few things I had; kind of talked me into letting her use /borrow toys; table; sewing machine.. She turned around & sold it at a yard sale a few months later & denied table & sewing machine were on loan.

We had a neighbor at our old house that we did a lot with. The tools they didn't have we did; what we didn't; they did. It was a great relationship too; my hub helped them & their hub helped us. When the neighbor helped my hub; I cooked dinner for both families & would bathe the kids so the mom could relax because I was appreciative of the help.

To this day; I can't believe what happened over an iron. I do not iron much; but I'm pretty sure I'd recently used it with no issues. I normally wash the fabric; then iron & cut the pattern out.

The iron at this point was probably close to 10 years old; but even the box was in great shape. I take care of my stuff & it lasts. Neighbor borrowed my iron & when I went to use it next; it didn't work. I was making bibs for the neighbor. I wasn't able to just jump in my car & replace it. I was still recovering from my huge back surgery; was down close to 8 months.

I saw her come home from Walmart with a new iron. Here I'm not driving; making bibs for 2 of the kids; I would have gladly given her a $20 to pick up a similar iron to what I had but she never offered anything. I didn't expect her to replace the iron; I was more hurt that she didn't ask if I wanted her to pick up a new one while she was out.

The story was that my iron didn't work when she used it. What I did not understand is why no one bothered to tell me it wasn't working. Wish I remember how I got to the store to buy a new one.

It bites but if you break something (anything) you borrowed don't you replace it? The solution should be discussed. In the case of something expensive; neighbor should have at least offered to get an estimate on repairs; then take it from there

This post was edited by roselvr on Sat, Jun 8, 13 at 12:30

I recently have had a similar situation happen to me & don't know what to do about it. So maybe you guys can give me your feedback here. A friend of mine had borrowed a brand new 4 combo power tool kit set that my sister had given me for Xmas 2011 (she gave one each to me & my husband so we each had our own). She borrowed it in January 2012 for a small project craft project, nothing else & was supposed to get right back to me. Occasionally I would ask her to get it back to me, and she would tell me that oh yeah, I need to do that.

I hadn't talked to her in several weeks and finally I just texted her because her daughter had mentioned they were going to the beach. So I told her that I really needed those power tools that I let her borrow before she left for vacation because my husband & I were going to take advantage of his time off over 4th of a July. She mentioned that she had used my power drill Every Day. But she would take a look at it & if it looks bad, she would buy me a new one. She had her daughter drop off the box of tools.

So the power drill has a piece broken off the back of it, it has paint all over it, it doesn't drill near as fast as my husband's brand new one that is exactly like it. And that is before I even get started on the sander or the condition of the saw.

So should I tell her that she needs to replace the drill or what? Personally, I think she should have to replace the entire power tool kit since every power tool is pretty much worn to crap now. She also did this to me with a black dress of mine that I just got back at the same time with the tools. She had borrowed it for her Mom's funeral over 2 years ago! I have asked her for the dress at least 5 times. And the first time she told me that she wanted to hang on to it in case she had a "hot date." So, do I press the issue of having her replace the power drill, or just cut my losses?

She doesn't sound like a very good friend. If I were you, I would cut my losses and dump her. Treat yourself to a new set of power tools.

People that do this sort of thing have no conscience and some "like my neighbor" convince themselves of another scenario. Since the tools still work somewhat makes your case a bit tricky. I would ask her to replace the whole set but wouldn't hold my breath on it happening. Most likely she will find some other sucker down the road to use.

I'd do what camminnc said. Dump her and buy yourself some new tools. Next time she comes around asking to borrow something, just look at her and say "do I know you?"

I agree. Do not lend this neighbor anything else.
When I saw this thread being revived, I thought about the time I borrowed a well used suitcase from my cousin.
The zipper broke! I replaced it with a brand new one.
But now I am thinking. If I lent something old to someone and it broke, should I really expect a new one back?

Can the set still be purchased? Some come out just for the holiday.

My opinion is she should buy you a whole new set & keep the set she trashed. Your set was brand new; never used. I would not hand it to her until she bought the new one.

Do you think she will replace it? Will she stop speaking to you when you ask?

I'd never lend her anything again. When she started finding use for it after the original reason; she should have returned yours & bought her own.

We lend things all the time and it has caused much frustration. We had one person borrow our lawn mower for a few times each summer for 2 years after his broke, then complain that it had no gas. We told him it was time to buy his own he was shocked. Then we lent a specialty ladder to a friend for working on stairs we called about getting it back 2 weeks later and found out it was lent out to someone else. Really?? Another time we lent out a drywall mud box and it took hours to clean off the baked on mud. I lent out my carpet cleaner and after it was gone a month I phoned to see if I could get it back ..............YUK it was full of dirty water still and starting to mold.

but on the other hand one time another friend borrowed the carpet cleaner and brought it back cleaner that it was when I lent it what a refreshing change. One time we borrowed a 4 wheel drive car to make a long winter trip the rusted muffler fell of and guess what we replaced it.

We still lend things but have to choose our attitude before hand if something goes wrong.

I loaned out a tile saw that is no longer in production. It was broke due to negligence of the borrower, but the replacement cost more than the older original saw. I felt guilty, despite knowing that replacing it was the right thing to do. I’m done loading tools; I buy them when I need them, I will always encourage friends to do the same.