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amj0517

How do you know you're ready for a second one?

14 years ago

A second dog, that is. We have 8 year old Rocky and the kids have never really paid much attention to him. An occassional scratch now and then, but nothing serious. I think he has always been like a piece of furniture to them (the kids are 4 and 2).

Recently the kids' interest in Rocky has been intense. They are all over him and the poor dog just tries to hide behind me for a break. I really hoped to wait until the kids were older before we got another dog, but now I think Rocky needs a break. Although, a puppy in the house would probably be all over Rocky too. What are your thoughts? I'd be curious to hear the experiences that you've had with

1) introducing a puppy to an older dog, and

2) introducing a puppy to young kids.

Thanks.

Comments (13)

  • 14 years ago

    I never thought we would have two dogs but the second dog came to us- long story. The two dogs have bonded as bbf and has amazed me. I see now how important it is for a dog to have another dog to socialize with and love. I'm still number one, of course, but the love they have for each other is precious.
    But I have no answers to your questions, our two are about the same ages.

    You don't have to get a puppy- there are many wonderful dogs needing adopting who might be a perfect fit for your family.

    Our dogs are both the same size and I think that has been one of their bonding elements. They can sniff butts and noses together.

  • 14 years ago

    I haven't ruled out adoption by any means. I laughed out loud ... sniff butts and noses together.

    I know that I don't want another 90 pound dog. Maybe a 60 pounder will allow for ample butt sniffing?

  • 14 years ago

    Howard was an only dog for years and grew up with the kids, but he got very lonely when they grew up and didn't have time for him. So that is when we got Zelda. But she was a puppy (he was 9) and she was small enough for him to handle. Instant love for both. But then she outgrew him and her energy level was more than his.

    So a few years later we found Max...big enough to play with Zelda (bigger actually) but not a puppy anymore. They're a year apart in age, and it worked out very well. She had a pal who met her energy level.

    I'd suggest that be the mitigating factor. If existing doggy is a bag of bones, a hyper smaller dog won't work. And I definitely think you should go with a dog in a similar age range.

    My DD is considering a 2nd dog as her boy is now 5 and has been getting grumpy. Her in-laws got a new pup & the two play pretty well but he does get tired of her constant nipping. We think another dog about 3 would be ideal. I can just see it now, tho...2 pugs!! Be still my heart!

  • 14 years ago

    If your kids are all over Rocky, I don't know that I'd get another dog. And you're right, the possibility of a new dog being at Rocky is probably what will happen.

  • 14 years ago

    In my experience, an adult dog will usually put a puppy 'into it's place' and the pup will learn when it's time to play with the older dog and when to leave the older dog alone. But, are you ready for multiple toddlers in the house? A puppy is very much like a 2 year old - into everything, doesn't know the rules yet, and often doesn't follow them if they do! It's a lot of work, as are two young kids. On the other hand, it's often easier to get an adult dog to accept a puppy when they might not accept another adult dog - it really depends on the dogs in question. Also depends on the kids in question - my DD never knew a time when there wasn't a pet (several) in the house, so learned at a young age to be gentle with them and when they wanted to be left alone. Puppy's, though, have very sharp little teeth, and until they're trained to be gentle, can inflict some scary (to a toddler) painful nips, which can harbor a fear in an impressionable mind that takes a bit to overcome.

    If it it were me, I'd probably wait until the kids were a bit older - sounds like that's your instinct, too, and a mom's instincts are always right.

  • 14 years ago

    We have two Australian shepherds. We purchased one (Bella)as a puppy and then, because her energy level was sooooo much more than ours, we adopted another Aussie (Cody) from Craigslist. Bella much prefers to play with Cody than with us, though Cody still remembers how wonderful it was being the only dog. They're always together and are also BFF.

    But, I got Bella the day after I retired, and she took such an unbelievable amount of time and energy, I don't know how people can train a puppy without being home with it.

    My DS and DIL adopted a puppy Christmas 2009, when their kids were 6 and 3. She's a wonderful dog, but still not completely trained! She still has occasional accidents and still mouths your arm. DS and DIL are extremely busy and we warned them how much time it would take.

    I think the idea of owning a puppy is much more attractive than the reality. With little ones like yours, you already have a full plate. Adopting an older dog is the way to go, but even then, the dog could come with problems a busy young mother wouldn't have time for.

    I'd also wait until your children are older.

    Dee

  • 14 years ago

    I would also wait until your children are older and work on teaching them how to treat your dog so he won't want to run and hide.

  • 14 years ago

    Oh, I don't know. We always loved having lots of pets. I figured as long as I was up to my elbows in kids, we might as well have pets, too. We have had dogs, cats, birds, lizards, gerbils, a rabbit. We always crate-trained our dogs so they'd have a place of their own. Much easier that way.

    A funny story. When the youngest of our six kids was about a year and a half old one of the big kids brought home a puppy. Baby and pup rolled and tumbled and grew together, becoming inseparable for the next 14 years. When she was about 10, "baby" and dog, now a 90 pounder, came bounding into the living room and plunked themselves down at Dad's feet. With her head resting on dog's belly, she said indignantly, "Dad, I am the only kid in this family who never had her own pet! I think I should get a pet."

    Dad was rather dumbstruck. He asked her what she thought she was resting her head on. She gasped, and said "She's a pet? No. She's part of my life. I mean a real pet." Oh, how we cried when that wonderful dog died.

    Anyway, kids and pets are a good thing. Good sugestions above about adopting an older dog. Devote yourself to high-intensity training for a couple weeks; it will pay off.

  • 14 years ago

    I adopted a 6 year old dog last summer. Our other dog was 8 months old at the time and I had high hopes they would be best buddies.

    It's been over a year now and that still hasn't happened. Also the 6 year old came with problems that weren't revealed right away.

    I could never have young children around this dog. I love her dearly (I think I'm the only one who does) but highly doubt I will adopt an older dog again.

    Really take the time investigating an older dog, preferable one that comes with a background. Mine had been abandoned so there wasn't any history.

  • 14 years ago

    Lots of good points made here. I am working with my boys so they can give poor Rocky a break. It's tough for them at this point but I'm sure they will get it with time.

    I spoke with DH about a puppy and he is on-board, but would like to wait until spring. I know puppies are a lot of work, so at least I have a few months to really think about it. I'd love to adopt, but my only apprehension was described perfectly by dawn8b. I know there is also a chance of getting an unpredictable puppy, but an adult could have a lot more "baggage" from an unknown history ("baggage" that I would not feel comfortable having around my kids).

    If we decide to adopt or get a puppy I'll be sure to post pictures when the time comes. Thanks for the feedback.

  • 14 years ago

    Amj, we also adopted our young dog from the SPCA. She was 7 weeks old at the time and what was supposed to be a 50 lb dog grew into 77 lbs of the BEST DOG ever. She is so sweet and I wouldn't hesitate to adopt another puppy from them in the future.

    I hope your future pup turns out as well ... good luck!!

  • 14 years ago

    Hard to say how the dog will react. Mine did not like it at all. He was 6 at the time. He was so insecure thinking we no longer loved him (would not get out of my lap!), that we were replacing him, that he would be cast off that he would have nothing to do with the puppy. It was sad to watch him ignore the new dog and he continued to treat him that way for the next 12 years. He remained alpha which was good, at least he didn't have to fight for that title because the new dog was by nature very passive. It's best to know from whoever has the dog you plan on adopting if they think the dog has an aggressive or passive personality. Our dogs never fought but if the new dog was aggressive then they may have.
    When my older dog got to the age where he could no longer keep up on walks it became increasingly more difficult for us because we didn't want the older dog to feel the sadness of being slower. It wasn't fair to the younger dog who needed longer walks. As the disparity grew we were forced to take them on separate walks. That took up more time. When our first dog got to be really old we weren't able to go places anymore because he needed to be looked after 24 hrs a day. That went on for a couple years which meant the younger one stayed at home a lot too. I would never have two dogs again so far apart in age. I have to say though, when it was time for our dog to leave us I did find a lot of comfort having another dog...an heir and a spare. ;-) He made the pain a little less severe. Now he's elderly and slowing down. After taking the back seat all those years to a more dominant dog I want him to live out his remaining time feeling like he is finally the most important dog in the world to us. And he's is loving the attention.

    The difference between my situation and yours is that you have young children and I don't have any. I would be concerned that a 4 yr old would still be too young not to pester your first dog as he ages. Dogs don't like to be bothered when they're older and children might be nipped at if they aren't taught by the parents to respect the elderly dog's space. So maybe having a younger dog to romp around with would be a good idea for your children. They can focus their high energy on the young dog, allowing the other dog to watch but not be expected to participate. But I wouldn't wait any longer.

  • 14 years ago

    Rocky does well with other dogs in the neighborhood, and when we have company and they bring their dogs. When we went on vacation my sister took him and he did well with her dogs too. He just fell into the pack (that may have been because he was at their house though).

    He is very mild-mannered so I think he would accept another dog. In fact, when my husband and I were first married I had an old cranky dog. Rocky tried to play with her and she nipped at him. He never went near her again, and the few times that she tried to initiate play he refused her. It was like he never forgot or forgave. :)

    There are pros and cons for getting another dog and for waiting. We're really going to think about it over the winter.

    Thanks for sharing your thoughts and stories.