My gyn suggested I visit the menopause clinic here. I was surprised to hear such a thing existed. I haven't been yet as I'm just starting and hoping that things even out after awhile, but it might be worth it to see if there is somewhere near you that specializes in treating symptoms related to menopause.

I love the Cool-jams products. I have the cooling sheets, cool pillow, cooling mattress pad and moisture wicking pajamas. The best defense against night sweats that I've found. Amazing products!!

I discovered Carole Hochman pj's at Costco and they are my absolute favorite. There are many pj and loungewear configurations to suits most every need.

They are light and comfortable. The fabric is so comfy to sleep in and they will allow you to easily cool down if you overheat at night.

Sueb I had a complete hysterectomy/oopherectomy when I was 32, the sweats were a nightmare until I went on estrogen. Mind you that many years ago the dosages were way higher than now. I flourished, my mind came back, I looked younger and never gained weight. I had to go off it when I was 58 as two sisters had breast cancer. The sweats and brain fog came back, just have to live with it. Seriously consider the estrogen as the body needs it. You produce none now.

oh and Kavinace is excellent for sleep.

When I feel a hot flash beginning, I try to drink something icy cold. It stops the flash almost instantly.

If you have night sweats best to stick with wicking fabrics like Cool-jams since they draw moisture away from the body and dry very quickly so you don't feel hot and cold all the time. Regular cotton or poly just isn't comfortable for people like me who tend to overheat and sweat.

I think jojoco's idea might help. Keep a thermos of ice water next to the bed. I get too hot in the summer and as soon as I drink ice water, it goes away. Just doing housework in the summer makes me sweat.

After my hysterectomy 12 years ago I demanded estrogen because of all the horror stories I heard. lol. They put a patch on me during surgery. A few days it was time to take it off and I was petrified because I didn't have anything to replace it with. I took it off, and never had a hot flash.

I used to have severe insomnia, some of it was caused by restless leg. Finally I asked my doctor if there was anything I can take for it and he prescribed carb/levo, to be taken an hour or so before bed. The only side effect is drowsiness and I've slept like a baby ever since and don't wake up groggy.

Also, if you're not prone to addiction, taking a half pill of a low dose anti-anxiety medicine works. I take a half pill maybe twice a week if I'm too wired to sleep.

I've been on both meds for 12 or so years now. Never had to up the dose. Even if I get up during the night for the bathroom, I'm not groggy, and I easily go back to sleep.

I do get hot easily so I keep a small oscillating fan pointing at me that sits on a chair close to the bed. My miracle machine. :)

The RTIC keeps beverages ice cold all day.

I couldn't sleep without my ceiling fan.

I bought a bed buddy hot/cold pack (for shoulders/back, don't know if they make other shapes, its like a fat snake with soft handles on the ends) some years ago when I was having some back problems, kept it in the freezer, when menopausal hot flashes/night sweats hit (at 45) it was indispensable the first year or so, I'd take it out of the freezer when I went to bed and wrap it over my forehead and down my neck or around my feet, it really helped.

I tried all the over the counter stuff, nothing worked and some made it worse. I was never successful with birth control pills before menopause so HRT was always out of the question, think I spent most of the first year naked the majority of the time, the flashes were so powerful and long lasting, sometimes I'm still surprised any brain cells survived the frying. After 12 years they're mostly gone but still get mild ones occasionally, night sweats only lasted a year or so.

I wish you well Sue, this malady is a real torment.

I have never had hot flashes but did have some sleeping problems. Hee's what has helped me. I will second the Cool Nights PJs by Soma. I have them in short sleeved and long sleeved tops. I like to have my legs covered so I have the long pants for summer and winter. I feel like I am sleeping naked in these. When I needed a new mattress I bought an all latex mattress from Sleep EZ and a shredded latex pillow from Savvy Rest. I also have a top sheet that is linen from Rough Linen although they are pricey. Hope a few of these things help.

Oscillating fan. On medium-low, fairly close to the face. Even in the winter.

Wintertime is a blessing for sleep. I adore cracking the window open so a little cold air can waft in.

The downside sleep-wise is that the Bichon wedges himself next to either me or DH and pins us in!

Cotton, cotton, cotton and a COLD room. The bedroom should never be above 60° even if that means running the AC in the wintertime. Forget the electric bill - you need sleep! And remember that "this, too, will pass" eventually.

In looking at reviews of Cool Jams pajamas on Amazon, Soma was mentioned as a better option. So I just ordered some of the "cool nights" pajamas at Soma.

I haven't turned on the heat in our room at all this winter! Fortunately the master bedroom is on a separate zone from the rest of the house.

Interesting re red meat and alcohol, ipinkmountain. I don't eat much red meat and I don't really drink much, but I have noticed that if I have a glass of wine, that is one of the few times I'll have a hot flash (before I even finish the glass) when I'm not in bed! Definitely see a correlation.

Yesterday, I did yoga, walked 4 miles, etc...was good and tired at bedtime so decided I'd skip my usual Advil PM/Zzquil routine. Wide awake at 2 am. Ugh. Got up and took 1/2 dose of NyQuil and slept until almost 8.

I never have caffeine in the afternoon anymore. That started affecting my sleep years ago. DH, on the other hand, could have a cup of coffee at 11 pm and fall asleep 1/2 hour later. In general, he can fall asleep about 5 minutes after his head hits the pillow. I hate him sometimes. ;-)

I have read that limiting meat and dairy (not just red meat) to sources free from added hormones and antibiotics may help.

My favorite nightgown for Texas summers is an Eileen West cotton ballet gown - fine weave, a little crisp, soft, light and air moves through it. I bought some linen to make DH a couple of sleep shirts. He sleeps hot and cotton tees just get funky after a while. I haven't gotten them made yet but hope to have them to try for this summer -- maybe pants too. I have thought about making myself a gown similar to the Eileen West one out of a lightweight linen - after I get DH his promised pjs.

We do have the Rough linen sheets and summer cover and use a fan when the weather is warm or humid but cool enough the AC is not coming on.

Can't help you with the meds, though for those taking most OTC sleep meds (Tylenol PM, Simply Sleep, etc.), check the label. The active ingredient in most is the same thing as Benadryl, which is available as a generic. You might save a lot of money gettting a bottle of generic benadryl.

17 years into menopause I still have night sweats and very rarely hot flashes during the day. While the night sweats are sleep disruptive they're not bad enough to necessitate getting up to change clothes or worse, the sheets. Pretty much have the ceiling fan on year round unless it's really cold out. I use flannel sheets in the winter, but the comforter is inside a cotton duvet which stays cool to the touch. It also helps to have a metal headboard to grab onto for cool relief. After a while your body will adjust and it will become nothing more than a minor annoyance.

17 years...

HA! It's really not that bad. I think I was so grateful that the daytime hot flashes pretty much disappeared after the first couple years, that I was willing to accept the night disruptions. I wake as the heat starts to build, fling off the covers and move my legs over the cooling duvet cover, then slip them back under once it subsides. It's sort of a mind game. If you practice yoga it's easier to get the hang of it.

I had to give up any and every type of alcohol. Once or twice a year I'll have a glass of a fine red wine and it destroys my sleep and brings on hot flashes. I feel lucky...a friend of mine found that coffee had that effect on her.

Yesterday morning I bragged on this thread about my night hot flashes being done. So of course, last night I woke up every couple of hours with a hot flash. Mine were definitely triggered by residual anxiety from a stressful day.

Gad, thankfully I never had hot flashes or night sweats. Seventeen years - OMG!

I had terrible hot flashes (hourly), night sweats, trouble sleeping, no sex drive, painful intercourse, brain fog, bone loss, you name it- I had it when not on estrogen.

I have no family history of female cancers but my mom and grandmother both had a terrible time with menopause. My mom still takes a super low dose of something and she is 73 and super healthy and in fabulous physical shape. My grandmother just suffered and was miserable, depressed and difficult to be around.

I was on Activella, and then a patch but I am now on Duavee. I was miserable without estrogen. My blood work 3 months after stopping the Activella showed severe estrogen deficiency. I liked the patch because of the deliver method and that the liver does not need to process the medicine. Duavee only comes in pill form. I have been on the Duavee for about 2 months and I finally have my groove back.

Does anyone take progesterone supplements? Seems to cover many of the complaints here and more.

I started reading up on it from a weight loss angle and how and why old diets no longer work after menopause. What I discovered is that it can also help with peri and post menopause brain fog, insomnia, low libido, increased daytime energy and more.

If you take a progesterone supplement or cream what do you use?

Rory, I was writing when you posted. I think I need to know more of this.

Oh goodness. I'm pre-menopausal and am starting to have night sweats... I can't do this for 17 years.

Sueb, perhaps try a naturopath or acupuncturist who specializes in Chinese medicine. I'm beginning to research this myself, and it's a different approach to managing menopause. It's not for everyone, but may be worth a look.

I think I should be pre-menopausal but I am still almost like clockwork. Are hot flashes somewhat genetic? My DS and DM never had them, after reading all this I googled it and 67% of women do

Lol, you are right, it should.

I always remember that in high school I read Betty Freudian , and she said that if men had periods they would brag about them… The duration and severity etc. Too funny and so true.

and they would probably have parties to celebrate when it was all over, too

I think I'm going to give this a try but start with 1/2 dosage as recommended on some of the reviews.

I am hoping that it will also help with my diet and exercise routine. From what I have read it could be the HUGE gap in the progesterone and estrogen (we get some estrogen environmentally) and how we process insulin post menopause. I am carrying too much in my middle and my old guaranteed weight loss programs work not at all. My momma didn't raise no quitter so I'm trying this product.

on the plus side for peri menopause this product has ...NO Phytoestrogens that can worsen estrogen dominance symptoms.

Kokoro Balance Creme for Women, Bioidentical Natural Progesterone Cream for Menopause Support, 2oz Jar, Paraben-free, No Phytoestrogens, Recommended By Dr. Lee Since 1996, Vegan and PETA Formulation

I tried progesterone cream, worthless for me, but YMMV.

Hi Pink, did you try the one above. I know some of these creams get horrible reviews.

No information to offer, but just sorry you're going through this. I have known several women who experienced the same thing. One said she cried at nothing for months. Hopefully you'll find something that helps.

Another thing that has helped me is getting rid of the hot foam mattress:) I bought a latex pillow too which seems to keep my head cooler. Has anyone had the same experience?

This was about ten years ago. I used a cream recommended in that book by Dr. John Lee. It was expensive and I followed the directions in the book to a T. Like I said, YMMV. Nothing wrong with trying the cream, it might be great, but seems best to figure out what has the most effects and focus on those. Problem is, from what I see, different things work for different people, since everyone's genes are different. Diet and exercise seem to be my biggest helpers. I mean I say "cut down" to be encouraging, but I would seriously try nixing the alcohol, because even a little bit hits me. And try to avoid the refined carbs/sugar/white flour stuff. I also take the calcium/mg. supplements and very occasionally melatonin, but it's not an every night thing, just occasionally to kick myself out of a bad sleeping cycle. The key that I have found is if I can avoid going to the bathroom a lot during the night, because I get up and will go through a round of hot flashes. And then, if I wake, can I fall back asleep? I find that the diet and exercise don't affect the waking, but sure affect my elimination and ability to fall back asleep. It's a struggle for me to try and get my fluid intake during the day instead of the evening when it affects me sleeping through the night.

I am so sorry you are going through this, Sue. Hot flashes are horrible. I had one in an airport once, and thought I was going to have to strip down right there. LOL I have learned to always wear layers of clothing just in case one hits.

This thread has been very interesting to me. Since I hit menopause, hot flashes, insomnia, anxiety and even intermittent depression have been pretty constant companions. I thought the anxiety and depression were from life events, but am now wondering if they are hormone-related. My neighbor recommended tart cherry juice for sleep, but it didn't help me. I might try that cream that justerrilynn posted.

I don't drink much wine anymore, because it is a guaranteed hot flash!

Tex, I'm going to pick some up now. Remind me and I will post an update. Although, I think this could be very individual depending on where you are at in the hormone department. There is a hormone test kit on Amazon that I should try first but I'm too cheap lol.

About alcohol and sleep loss... for me one glass of red wine or two with dinner out do not affect my sleep. No white wine at all for me, even one glass affects my sleep. Don't know about other alcohol but too much of anything usually is not good.

Mtnrdredux - thinking you meant to write Betty Friedan?

"Freudian" slip - or auto correct? = J

Seems like this is a case where natural remedies may not be enough. I used Black Cohosh & some herbal blends, & also sleeping in the raw, along w/ exercise, yoga, lavender oil & Sleepytime Extra tea (Celestial Seasons). My severe 'power surges' subsided some years back, but I still get an occasional wave & reading that stress/anxiety can be a trigger explains a lot, since I do seem to have anxiety issues as I age. It seems to run in our family as my mom, son, and both sisters deal w/ anxiety well.

I don't have insomnia, but am such a light sleeper, it almost amounts to the same thing.

Will be interesting to know what the Dr. says...

I've been on bio-identical hormone cream for several years. I rocked along just seeming being "ok" but nothing that made my life stand on it's ear!...till last summer. A raise in progesterone made everything I could complain about VANISH. Woohoo! Only problem, I noticed the normally smooth cream was "gritty". Wasn't terribly concerned since I was on cloud 9 :) So if a little bit more progesterone was good, a little more would be better and I asked my Dr to increase it. She did. Yeah, well, too much of a good thing can be too much of a good thing :o Normally smooth cream is still gritty. Third month I asked her to take the progesterone back down to June's level. She did. Cream was smooth (as it has been for years). At that point I emailed her to find out why June and July's prescriptions were gritty. She said they shouldn't have been and in fact, they wouldn't work as intended if they were gritty. August's hormone cream was smooth (but the same prescription as June). I started spiraling out of control mentally, emotionally, physically. There wasn't one system in my body that wasn't suffering. Googled progesterone side effects and overdose and had every single symptom. At one point I was using a walker to get around the house. Stopped using the cream for about a month and started feeling better. Went back to the Dr to be retested and I was WAY WAY too low after a month of no progesterone.

Back on the dose before all hell broke loose but I'm not swing from the chandelier like I was (darn!) Next month I'll try increasing it.

SueB ... SImply Sleep is Tylenol PM without the Tylenol. You get the benefit of sleep without taking the pain-relieving part. I use Dr. Teal's Epsom Salts three times a week in a bath. There is one with Lavender. I prefer the unscented because the scented ones are quite fragrant. They may be worth a try.

Dr. Teal's Epsom Salts

My DD who will be 46 next month, had the same surgery as you 2-3 years ago & is on Estradiol 0.05mg patch & she has not had any of your symptoms. She also has MS & so sleep & exercise are very important for her to keep flares of that to a minimum. I had full hysterectomy by age 42, took estradiol tablet & did well, too. No hot flashes at all ever. I really think you could try the patch & see how it goes. What you're going through is just not fun!!

"rotating selection of Tylenol PM, Advil PM, and Zzzquil to sleep." The sedating medication in all of those (and many other OTC sleep meds) - is the same, diphenhydramine.

If it is the insomnia that is most bothersome, be sure to emphasize that to your doc, there are many other medications that may work better for you.

Honeywell has a thermostat that allows you to control the AC from your phone. The app is simple to use. It might bring you some relief. Honeywell-Wi-Fi-Smart-Thermostat

Sueb20 - I hear ya girlfriend! This hormonal rollercoaster is not for sissies.

On a good night I was sleeping maybe 4 broken up hours. I never nap during the day. I have always been an insomniac, but could sleep five hours straight before, now since menopause (5 years) I am plagued by hot flashes that give me sweats then chills. I use BI hormones and these help to a degree but do not completely alleviate. I don't know if my flashes and chills are worse than others but I do know, if I don't use BI, I literally cannot go out in public. Sweat pours off my face and I actually passed out at the office once. So...

Then before the holidays I started to have a real problem period sleeping and tried all the OTC remedies and my usual melatonin/valerian cocktail and was getting no where. I cannot take script meds. Then I decided to move to the guestroom because I was waking my DH with my tossing/turning, up to BR etc.

For a month I guess I went through a sort of sleep detox and reset my patterns- I've had to do this before. Went a couple nights where I got may be two hours sleep but now am where I can sleep maybe four hours, then wake for a flash but don't need to get up for a BR visit, then can go back to sleep for a couple more hours. This is revolutionary for me. I believe my DH was keeping me (he snores) from actually getting into a sound REM and I would get up, wake completely read and have to restart the process and never get more than 3-4 broken hours. We talked about it yesterday and he thinks he is sleeping better too without me there. So he's getting 9 hours of undisturbed sleep instead of 8...I hate him ;)

So my recommendation get an hormonal evaluation have them check your cortisol levels (saliva test) too. Get on some hormones. Lack of sleep is worse for your health than taking hormones.

The devise that helps me the most for cooling during sleep is a small vinyl covered pad I bought in a heating pad combo that is used for icing an injury. I just keep it next to my pillow and when I have a flash I pull it over to lay my face and neck on. It is cool enough without refrigeration to do the trick. I turn it over a time or two to a cool spot till the flash passes. I have cooling pillows and jammies etc but this one little thing has helped me the most. That and moving out of the bedroom...

Also Arianna Huffington has a sleep book out - has any one checked to see what she's come up with?

yes, but it wont let me edit it, Carol! Stupid spell ck

This is the first morning after my Kokoro Balance cream (two uses) so too early to say much. My sleep was not great. Normally I do go into a deep sleep for around three or four hours somewhere between 4:00 and 8:00 and get up banging into walls. This morning even without much sleep I bounded out of bed at 7:00 feeling lively. Food tasted weird and I actually had to force myself to eat. I don't like bananas at a certain ripeness due to the texture so that just about had me gagging. I had a peice of turkey breast and that tasted like meat sliced off a live bird. Gross. Didn't read about any taste side effects in my research.

In a perfect world this cream will eventually help me with better sleep. Food tasting gross might be a beneficial side effect. I'm hoping getting up with a bit more spring to my step isn't a fluke.

I'm not saying you should or shouldn't take hormones, you do you and all, but it just delays the inevitable hot flashes and other symptoms. Once you discontinue them, your body will still go through whatever it plans to do as the hormones leave your system. It might be that postponing that until a later time (no longer dealing with young kids, no longer working, whatever) is your best decision, only you and your doctor can determine that. Some people don't plan to ever discontinue use and feel the benefits outweighed any downsides (I believe 2 former frequent posters were taking them without plans to stop).

I wonder if your family history of ovarian cancer is a factor in whether or not they are appropriate for you?

Coincidentally, I had the same experience as someone above, the male doctor pushed hormones and the female nurse practitioner discouraged long term use. I don't know what that means, I just found it curious.

Its a complicated decision. There are strong opinions and probably plenty of studies to back up both sides. Good luck. I hope you find what you need.

My mom and my MIL both had hysterectomies the same summer. They were in their mid-40's. Both went on hormones almost immediately. My mom was a bear (personality wise) if she did not take them. I really don't know what other symptoms she might have had. She passed away at age 72 and was still on them. I believe my MIL still takes them, not sure. So apparently, you can take them forever. My question for you would be what are the risks for someone with your family background of ovarian cancer taking hormones? My own gyn was in favor of hormones and she said she would have taken them herself had she not have a family history of breast cancer. I took BC pills for several years and only quit when I was getting close to menopausal age. Summer of 2015 I had a biopsy and D&C for bleeding which turned out to be a polyp. No cancer, pre-cancer, etc. and uterine biopsy confirmed menopausal process. So far, I have not thought of hormones, because I have not had symptoms. I think I would be very wary of taking them, but who knows? If symptoms were bad enough would I?

My mother took hormone replacement after hysterectomy, and continued into her 80s with no ill effect.

I had "vasomotor instability" (ie hot flashes, actually getting faint and nauseated when they started and having several every hour, night sweats etc) so severe that I went on HRT also; but I stopped after a couple of years -- the flashes weren't so bad then, but still not fun. The only home remedy that I have found to work (as in, only one hot flash a day or less) is evening primrose oil. Soy concoctions made them worse, black cohosh had no effect, testosterone cream (non-prescription) also no effect. Flaxseed helped, but not enough.

Sugar definitely will trigger one, coffee often does (thank goodness I rarely want coffee!)

Keeping the house cooler in winter definitely helps, and a fan in the bedroom in summer (I can't crank up the AC, it will give me a headache!)

Taking benadry (diphenhydramine) frequently has been tentatively associated with a higher risk of dementia, so I am not a fan of those sleeps aids. I'm not a fan of prescription sleep aids in general, have seen too many elderly patients become confused when given them in the hospital.

I just want to thank everyone for sharing their experiences -- clearly this is not a "one size fits all" problem. Amazing how different each woman's experience can be and I'm sure doctors vary widely in what they recommend. My surgeon (a gyn oncologist) said "don't be afraid of estrogen." Obviously I'd want a little more specific info than that.

I also wasn't thinking that estrogen would just delay the inevitable...but maybe if you go on estrogen and wean off it, the process can be more gradual and less shocking to your system? (I believe surgical menopause is much more abrupt/dramatic than natural menopause.)

From this discussion, I have a few new "tricks" to try on my own, and some good questions to ask the dr at my appt., so thank you!

I hope all these stories and advice might help someone else going through this, too. You're all such a great resource!