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nancyjane_gardener

Moving. How do I meet the neighbors?

We've been in our country property with the same neighbors for 33 years. We are planning on moving into town.

The street we are moving to is one of the most exclusive in town! (Think the Pollyanna mansion) We just happened to get a house at the least expensive end of the block from some people who were desperate to sell! =) !

We are kinda the older hippie type, do our own gardening and are a little "out there!", but very nice!

I would kind of like to do some kind of meet and greet type get together to get to know the neighbors a little bit, but don't really know how to approach them.

We do know a friend of our neighbors, but haven't met them yet.

Should I join a neighborhood social network and invite them through that? Slip invitations under their doormat? Put up flyers in the neighborhood (I don't think so!)

I'm guessing that I will be meeting most like-minded neighbors when I check out the community garden a couple of blocks away.

What about bringing a plate of cookies or something to the immediate neighbors? Is this still done?

As I said, I've been in the same country neighborhood for 33 years and the latest new comer came about 18 years ago! Nancy

Comments (28)

  • cooper8828
    7 years ago

    The people I bought my house from took me around and introduced me. It was easy!

  • nancyjane_gardener
    Original Author
    7 years ago

    We aren't really of the same ilk as the neighbors! We're are a retired artist and spec educator and these people are doctors, lawyers and dot com millionaires! Kind of out of our league! Also, the sellers are out of the country. Nancy

  • gellchom
    7 years ago

    In my experience, the neighbors bring a plate of cookies or something to the new neighbors, not the other way around. That would seem kind of strange; they are welcoming you, after all. Not all of them will, of course, but a few next door or very near.

    A party is a nice idea, but wait a bit til you've met a few people. Don't just invite the whole neighborhood as soon as you move in.

    It sound like you are very friendly people who will have no trouble getting acquainted. The garden is an excellent idea. The library and park, too. If you have a dog to walk, that works great. Or just go for a walk and say hi as you go. That's less overwhelming to your new neighbors than being invited to a party by strangers.

    Keep in mind that, based on what you told us, your new neighbors may not have as much free time as you do.

  • nancyjane_gardener
    Original Author
    7 years ago

    gell, I was thinking of an open house type thing in the spring. There are plenty of dog walkers (but mine doesn't walk much. He's a 14 YO chihuahua who sleeps 22 hrs a day! ;) ) I thought of borrowing my daughter's friend's shitzu, which seems to be THE dog of the area, but that takes some driving.

    I'm surprised that there really are quite a few people taking walks in the morning! Most seem to be of retirement age, but much older than I (Took an early retirement!) I'm very surprised to see so many of these million $ homes with baby/child things in the yards! Who can afford these places when you're young enough to have babies?????? Certainly not US!

    Anyway, as I said....we are NOT millionaire yuppies! Just Country bumpkins moving into town! Just happened to get a good price for our property and a inheritance at the same time. Nancy

  • gellchom
    7 years ago

    So give a party after you've had a chance to meet people. If you really want to invite everyone, organize a block party.

    And be careful not to make comments about money, fanciness of houses, and yuppies and such. I know you are just grateful for your good fortune, but it may well put people off.

  • nancylouise5me
    7 years ago

    Does your neighborhood have a community committee to keep residents abreast of happenings? contact them. You said you see many walkers. Find out if there is a group you can join and walk with them. If you see a neighbor outside while walking, strike up a conversation, introduce yourself. Keep the conversation light and short. Have you checked out to see if there is an Artist's Association? Check into that. Getting to know your neighbors will take time. Don't force yourself on them. I would nix the party/open house idea till farther down the line. No walking up to their front door with a plate of cookies to introduce yourself. That is what they should be doing for you. Whenever new people moved into the neighborhood, I would bake blueberry muffins(I am in Maine after all) and bring them over. Wouldn't go inside, just kept the conversation short. They are moving in and probably had a lot to still do getting their house in order. Introduced myself. left my phone number in case they needed help or a question answered. Ease into it.

  • littlebug zone 5 Missouri
    7 years ago

    I'd do a very low-key garden something in a few months. You sound very friendly, but you also sound fixated on the gee-I-want-to-fit-in-with-these-rich-people issue. Forget how exclusive the neighborhood is and how much $$ your neighbors have. Don't try to impress. (Been there, done that. We did the very same when we moved to the golf course.)

    Rich people are just like the rest of us. They are just people. Find common ground with them - dog walking, like you said, and gardening.

  • sushipup1
    7 years ago

    I don't like the idea of knocking on doors or having a party too soon. We moved here in May. We found that it was easy to ask neighbors for advice: What are your favorite restaurants? The two closest stores are Giant and Acme, which do you like best? What a pretty dog? Where do you get it groomed? Have you found a great mechanic for your Lamborghini? I've been looking for a great plant nursery, what do you recommend? Can you recommend nail salon/dentist/pizza?

    And some neighborhoods are easier than others. Just be patient. Get outdoors, walk, and talk to everyone.

  • nancyjane_gardener
    Original Author
    7 years ago

    A friend of a friend supposedly lives on the block. We can start there. I have talked to the neighbor across the street, and though somewhat friendly, he wasn't very.....what? Welcoming? I don't know how to describe it.

    Anyway, I'm not going to stress on it.If we make friends in the area great! If not our old friends are not far away!

    Just noticed that the Y is only a few blocks away, so water aerobics and activities will probably be in the mix! Nancy

  • hooked123
    7 years ago

    Be careful as there might be neighborhood dynamics that you being new don't have knowledge of. I am so glad that we didn't have a party when we moved in as we later found out many of the neighbors on our street don't like each other and have had tiffs in the past. It's actually a complicated endeavor. Once we moved to a new city and started attending a new church we invited several couples over for lunch after the service, only to learn later that they didn't like each other, they were polite though to each other during the lunch.

  • nancyjane_gardener
    Original Author
    7 years ago

    Took a walk through the hood today and found probably the zaniest neighbor around! ;)! Of course we got along great with her! LOL

    Unfortunately, there is no real estate available in the community garden, but we might click with the ones who garden there. Maybe we can sneak in a tomato plant or 2 for helping! Nancy

  • HighColdDesert
    7 years ago

    Since you like gardening, one thing to try could be to take walks through the neighborhood on the weekend and when you see someone gardening, stop and say you've just moved in, ask what that lovely plant is, and maybe offer a plant swap o maybe they'd offer you some propagation materials. That way you'd meet people with at least that interest in common with you.

  • nancyjane_gardener
    Original Author
    7 years ago

    Ummmm, they all have gardeners! LOL Nancy

  • Sarah (z7bNC)
    7 years ago

    Having or going to a neighbor's yard sale when it warms up will be a good way to meet & greet. But I'm the shy type so that would be my approach

  • Renee Texas
    7 years ago

    We always took the initiative, knocked on our immediate neighbors doors, and introduced ourselves. We also made a point to the in the front yard/going on walks a lot the first month or two as an excuse to introduce ourselves and whatnot :)

  • chas045
    7 years ago

    The dog walks were very useful for us; we ran into many people that way. Of course, just walking will do the same thing. Our wonderful next door neighbor did come over with a plate of cookies; it was wonderful and we talked for an hour.

    I can see how 'they all have gardeners' could be an issue. However, most folks like to think that they have something to do with home appearance and concepts. I certainly ask garden questions of my neighbors. Even if the gardener planted the exotic tree, bush or whatever, your neighbor would probably love to tell you why they or their gardener thought it would be striking in their beautiful landscape. As a gardener, you might have a little advise on what to watch out for, or be so impressed with their choices. Both are conversation starters. And they (or their gardener) would probably know where to get certain plants or have their air conditioner repaired!

    The real issue appears to be class. I have no idea what a 'spec educator' is, but it is my opinion that artists are in the same general class with the doctor to indian chief crowd. If 'dot com' means California, then that goes double, so you may not have much to worry about.

    But like others above, I wouldn't push with the cookies or party. I would ask questions and give helpful gardening advise and tell them about the hidden country source for industrial quantities of compost, or whatever, that your country living has taught.

  • lindac92
    7 years ago

    If I know the yuppies in the million dollar homes with the child equipment in the yard, they don't have "gardeners" they have a crew who cuts the grass, trims the bushes, edges and lays mulch, but the petunias in the pots are planted by the owners. You might ask where the best place to buy bedding plants is.....and if your chihuahua is 14....you might be soon looking for a Shitzu..;-).


  • nancyjane_gardener
    Original Author
    7 years ago

    Sushipup! mechanic for your Lamborghini! HAHA! The going joke is that the DH drives a 1999 PU. I told him he should probably get a new truck, ya know cause of the neighborhood! He loves his old truck!

    So I decided that we would just strap a few rakes and shovels to the truck and they would think it was the gardeners truck!

    But then the neighbors would be wondering why the gardener"s truck was parked at my house every night!

    I'm having an affair with the gardener!

    Lindac92- looking for a shitzu.....well, we're not really in the market for a new dog, but maybe we could put the 14 YO chihuahua into one of those fuzzy slippers and pass it off as a shitzu! LOL Nancy

  • corvese44
    7 years ago

    Go introduce yourself! Maybe have a BBQ with a few other people already invited so it's happening and then invite them over as well. Hope it's going well!

  • nancyjane_gardener
    Original Author
    7 years ago

    Well, the next door neighbor came by with a decadent banana bread (that we promptly put in the freezer!) VERY VERY nice!

    I think once we're settled in we'll have them over and learn about the new neighborhood! A good start! Nancy

  • nancyjane_gardener
    Original Author
    7 years ago

    Actually, DH is a history buff and we're in an historical neighborhood, so we'll have some stuff to discuss! Nancy

  • nancyjane_gardener
    Original Author
    7 years ago

    Ends up I don't have to trade in the chihuahua! There are several in the hood! Nancy

  • sushipup1
    7 years ago

    How is it going in your new house? What's worked for meeting new neighbors?

  • User
    6 years ago

    Many of these people are just your neighbors; that doesn't necessarily mean they're your friends. I have a nodding relationship with my neighbors; I talk with my friends.

  • PRO
    Laurelwood Interiors
    6 years ago

    I'm in the same boat. Moved from the country where everyone knew each other and we all have lived there forever. Now we are in a small townhome community, I've met a few of the neighbors but don't really know how to approach them and actually get to know them. We are expecting our first child in the spring and the neighbors all have kids so i'm hoping once that happens it'll open a few doors. With all the technology now, I feel like people don't just greet you to the neighborhood like the good ol' days.

  • gellchom
    6 years ago

    There is nothing like kids for getting to know other parents. I'm sure you will meet lots of neighbors when you push your baby in the stroller in the nice weather.

  • nancyjane_gardener
    Original Author
    6 years ago

    Mandee....having kids just opens things up!

    Update.About a year later. The nice neighbors who brought us banana bread are the only people we have had more than a nodding relationship. Now, a year later they have sold their house and moved to southern CA..

    The majority of the people with dogs are what we call "Park-n-walkers" who come in from other areas to stroll the avenue.

    It seems that most people who live in the area are retired and hide in the house, or working their butts off trying to afford their homes!

    Everyone we have met have been very nice! Just not available!

    Oh well, we have plenty of friends just a short drive away!

    We met several people the week before Halloween (Even my HS History teacher!)! This Ave is THE place to be on Halloween! We figured we had 1300-1400 trick or treaters! (we had ONE at our country house in 33 years!)

    Looking forward to new neighbors next door and will be bringing them a plate of cookies! Nancy

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