You're a caring friend, Lars. I wish your friend well.

Actually, you do pay a small premium for Part B. And YES he can and should get his supplement when he signs up for Medicare B. He can talk to Social Security/Medicare on the phone and get what he needs to get a supplemental plan then. He should call the Washington County Council on Aging ASAP. It's free and they will guide your friend thru the Medicare process.

https://www.washco.utah.gov/departments/council-on-aging/

Have your friend try his county SHIP office - they should be able to advise on the insurance --

State Health Insurance Assistance Programs

www.shiptacenter.org

SHIPs help people navigate Medicare choices with unbiased state-specific guidance.

Sushipup has great advice! My dad chose not to have a supplemental. Well he did have one to start with, then at some point he was going to have to change (can't remember why), but the monthly cost of the supplemental was higher than his medical bills. So Greg may be okay without one. But as Sushi suggested, there is someone to guide him through that. I'm very sorry for what he is going through. If he has symptoms that would lead him to believe he has covid 19, he could go to a urgent care clinic. I would imagine that it might be hard to find a primary care physician with all this going on. I wish him the best.

And Elmer Fudd, you need to remember the old saying: "if you can't say something nice, keep your mouth closed". Do you honestly think your comments help at all???

I agree with what Oly said, there must be a physician somewhere in the community who is not biased (and if not, get the heck outta there!, BF in tow). I don't think he has "invented a problem" ..., I imagine he knows of whence he speaks.

<<Elmer, what makes you think he has no medical coverage? He has medical insurance from work, which will end May 1, and he also has Medicare A.

<I have no doubt there are caring doctors there of all affiliations, and of none, who wouldn't reject him as a patient.>

That's because you do not live in Utah and do not have to deal with discrimination on a daily basis. Your having no doubt has little effect on the reality of the situation.>>

Elmer is good at drawing false conclusions based on zero facts.

Tina, I'm a believer in the approach that if you think someone needs a kick in the backside, ignoring the real problem and patting them on the head instead makes things worse.

Why remain in Utah if it is so hostile?

eliz - BF is a real estate agent; not a portable job

I guess I was mistaken thinking they were retirement age.

It might be a little more difficult, but he just has to find the gay Mormon doctors. They are there.

Having had rotator cuff surgery in January, I am doing PT three times a week in an outpatient setting. All staff wear masks (except to drink their ever-present beverages) and all patients are required to wash hands with soap and water when entering. There are no chairs in the waiting room and each cubicle has its furniture wiped down whenever a patient enters for their treatment.

I feel safe. I went to the grocery one hour before closing tonight and there were hardly any other customers in the store. I did not wear a mask, but I took a wipe in with me and wiped everything that I put in my basket.

It is fortunate that the person in charge at the nursing home finally got smart about the situation. That was not a wise choice to wait like that. In some circumstances a person might be tempted to report that experience to the state. Too late now, but it would give the state something to look at in the future. And that comment is from someone who worked in a county-owned 243-bed nursing home for several years.

A lot of Mormon innuendos and bashing on this thread. I live in a town with a relatively high Mormon population and have nothing but positive experiences. Most Mormons are just normal people, living life and doing the best they can for their families. My son, who was a quirky kid, went to a scout troop run by the Mormon Church. They had the best organized scouting program in the area. They welcomed all religions, races and even gay boys. The scout leaders were very understanding, supportive and patient with my son's issues. He was not an easy kid and they worked with him to get him to achieve his Eagle rank. We were always welcomed at the scouting events and religion was never brought up, except for basic prayers as part of the scouts.

No, we are not Mormon and actually didn't know any before we moved here.

I hope my posts weren't seen as Mormon bashing...some of my closest friends are LDS members :-) and they are wonderful. But the reality of what I've posted about is just that. It isn't bashing to say that they watch out for their own or that they are anti-gay. I don't think all members are anti-gay, but the church is not inclusive. And there are lots of gay Mormons who struggle with that.

Lars, what a wonderful friend you are. I wish Greg the best in his search for a primary care physician and you are right, it is so important to be completely honest with one's doctor. That requires that the doctor be someone the patient can trust.

’m sorry your friend is going through this. However, I agree that as a health professional he knows what he should be doing to maintain his health.

Here is my opinion. He is one of those people that has an aversion to doctors.

Easier to blame something rather than face this fear.

i know someone who will not go to a dentist!

I have never been asked my sexual identity from a doctor. I am talking about all the years I was single.

Is Utah different? Is sexual identity a box that has to be checked off?

~~~~

you've never been asked because the doctor assumes you are straight. In the course of an examination, a gay person might need to tell the doctor his/her orientation.

This happened when I was 20 years old. The doctor asked me if I'd had sex. I said no. He said "are you normal?" -- implying I was gay.

Retirement is a "qualifying event" to apply for Medicare Part B. Greg should go to the website and look for a form for his former employer to complete with information about last date of employment. Have employer send the form back to him so he can make copies. Applying online for part A was easy. For part B it was an unmittigated disaster. They lost my forms, didn't communicate, provided incorrect information, etc. That's why he needs copies of the forms, and screen shots of anything done online. I finally went to the Social Security office and it was quick and easy. Unfortunately, that isn't an option right now. Once he has part B, he can apply for a Medicare Advantage Plan (aka Part C). I did that part online without problems. Not having an existing provider makes it hard to determine which network is the best fit, but he can change at the next open enrollment if he doesn't like what he chose. Medicare has made some changes in coverage to accomodate COVID-19.

Medicare Site with Info about Coverage for COVID-19

Lars he doesn’t have to wait for Open Enrollment period to apply for Part B. If I understand you correctly, he had coverage through his employer and didn’t previously need the Part B; now he does. He qualifies to enroll now per the Special Enrollment Period...see this Medicare.gov link.

https://www.medicare.gov/sign-up-change-plans/how-do-i-get-parts-a-b/part-a-part-b-sign-up-period 

i kept my husband on my group plan for a couple of years after he was eligible was able to pick up Part B before open enrollment. The best I remember, my HR department had to complete a form that he was no longer covered on my plan. Greg will need to do the same.

I am pretty sure he can also pick up a supplement and drug plan without waiting until open enrollment because this is considered a Qualifying Event (loss of employment coverage) as a result of retirement. Insurance agents are essential business so he should be able to find an agent to guide him through this.

Does his husband have a primary care doctor? If so, that's who I would suggest he go to.

I do not think Mark has a primary care doctor either, and Mark was on Greg's insurance plan, but he has already gotten his own insurance. Mark is about five years younger and is not retirement age.

Greg has extensive medical training, and so I do think he knows very much about his own health and body, and I think this is why he has not felt the need to have a primary care doctor, but I will try to convince him otherwise at this point. He is not able to do blood tests, but he is aware that his blood pressure is normal, and he does not have family history of health problems like I do.

What about a colonoscopy? Everyone over the age of 60 needs one. A friend's husband has his first one at 66, and fortunately he did because colon cancer was found. Had he waited or not had one, it would have been too late.

Lars, Part B is what's deducted from the SS check, sorry I didn't make it clear. Your doctor may suggest a good insurance company for a supplemental insurance but make sure you ask him/her if the premiums are affordable. With us, having both Part A and B of Medicare wasn't going to cover much. Humana fills it all in, and it covers quite a bit of our meds. Doctors usually aren't going to know what your premium payments will be, because I think it depends on your medical history.

Sephia, unfortunately that's what's wrong with health care in this country. Many people can't afford a colonscopy.

The truth of a person living a high risk lifestyle with no consistent health care in place blows my mind. Add to that he is a person trained in a medical career...These are the exact sort of decisions people this century are making and denying they impact us all--GLOBALLY...Colonscopy?!! How about regular HIV testing!!!

Arcy, why are you assuming a high risk lifestyle?

My thoughts below are based on my recent experience registering my husband for Medicare so if anyone sees a mistake please correct me!

As others have said your friend can sign up for Medicare Part B immediately since he has retired (qualifying event). That takes care of the government's major areas of healthcare coverage.

However the supplemental portion is a bit more involved. He has the option to go into either a Medicare Advantage plan or to purchase a supplemental policy. They are not the same!

Advantage plans basically move the participant into a privately managed but government regulated form of Medicare. Advantage providers receive a fixed amount per person from the government (~$11K/person/year) and they then manage all medical services the person receives. So the major plus is that most Advantage plans cost nothing to the individual because the Part B premium is covered by the provider and they offer extras not available in standard part B plans-dental, vision, health maintenance like exercise programs etc. The downside is that participants are limited in the doctors and hospitals they can use.

A supplement OTOH is an additional insurance plan that is purchased and paid for by the individual, the monthly premium is a cost incurred in addition to the part B cost. These plans are more expensive but they add a layer of protection that can make additional health care costs negligible or nonexistent (above the premium costs) and they allow the participants to choose the doctors, facilities and specialists they wish to use.

Also VERY important to know is that the initial enrollment period is the only time during which one can choose a plan without health underwriting being a factor. Put another way, when you first enroll in Medicare (regardless of whether it is a supplement or an advantage plan) you can't be denied enrollment based on preexisting health conditions. This can be huge and will also factor into future medical needs.

After the initial enrollment period, insurance carriers will require disclosure of health conditions and may refuse coverage. Many people who choose advantage plans based on the lower cost when they are younger/healthier are put in difficult situations later as health conditions worsen with age and they find their plan won't cover medical expenses, specialists or procedures. At that point they won't be able to pass a health screening to get into a supplement plan that would. So that's a VERY important factor to consider.

Last but not least is Medicare Part D-drug coverage. If a Medicare enrollee does not sign up for a drug coverage plan at the time of initial eligibility and wants to do so later, there is penalty assessed based on a monthly charge. It isn't exorbitant but it is something to be aware of....if you don't get drug coverage right away you could end up paying a penalty charge for the rest of your life if and when you do want or need it.

That's an excellent summary!

Lars....You are such a good friend! I can see your worried...and friends do that. Your right about disclosing to a doctor his sexual orientation. Greg was right to wear a mask and gloves when working......geez....those people are idiots! Lots of people trying to help your friend here. I'm not in the medical profession or old enough for medicare.....just wanted to lend my support.

Through the magic and anonymity of the internet, there are ways to seek information anonymously about a gay-accepting doctor in the city this man lives. Citi-data.com 's collection of forums is one of them. And I have not researched it, but I would bet there are lots of gay-oriented websites where such information is available.

My first thought re insurance was to contact AARP—-they are a wealth of information for seniors. SHIPS was also mentioned and I know my husband talked to them and felt they were very helpful. I agree that gay organizations would likely have info on gay-friendly doctors in his area. Good luck to Greg and kudos to him for insisting on wearing protective gear.

Lars, that is very concerning about the lack of PPE for health care providers. I hope your friend can find a doctor who is not judgmental about his sexual orientation. It is so very discouraging that in 2020 that is still an issue. I hope he stays well. I agree that AARP is a wealth of information regarding Medicare and the different options.

Joanie, AARP actually sells its name to United Healthcare to sell supplemental insurance, so they are not an impartial source of information on this subject. As stated above, SHIP programs (under different names in different states) are federally funded to assist in Medicare decisions, and have nothing to sell.

Good luck to your friend Lars. I imagine it must be so stressful Too bad his partner couldn’t be persuaded to move to a more tolerant community.

Lars, given my unhappy experience registering for part B online, I've given some thought to what I'd do if I needed to enroll at this time. Call the main number and setup a phone appointment to enroll. The appointment will be will several days out with someone from the local Social Security office. This is important, because the forms will have to be sent to Social Security. As my local Social Security person told me, "NEVER send anything to Social Security unless you can send it to a specific person. Otherwise, it may get lost." (Yep, it did - twice!)

DH applied for Social Security via a phone appointment this week. Couldn't do it online because there was a problem (apparently I married a dead man - loooong story), but we got it untangled. The woman from the local office was working from home. She said that there's a skelleton crew in the office, but they aren't doing any in-person appointments.

I do frequently go to the city-date web site, and it does list interesting demographics for St. George, which is not at all a diverse place. The only significant minority is Hispanic with about 17% of the population, and this population is mostly Catholic. The vast majority is Mormon, and the next largest religious group is fundamentalist Protestant/Pentecostal, and they are not known for being tolerant either.

Perhaps Mark would consider moving to Palm Springs when he retires, but that will be a few years from now. I know they would both be happier here, and they do visit here fairly often.

As for living a risky lifestyle - I don't think that is even possible in St. George, and Greg and Mark are in a long-time committed relationship. They've been together for at least 20 years.

I really appreciate all the help and support here! I will give Greg more info in my next email to him.

I want to encourage him to seek out a Primary Care Physician. They are our entry port into the medical world. If he were to have troubling symptoms he could be months away from an appointment with a doctor who can diagnose and send him where he needs to go. the older you are the more important it is. Unfortunately he has already lost the window of not being Medicare. Doctors have limits on how many Medicare patients they will accept since they payments can be lower. Not as bad as Medicaid but still an issue. Find a good doctor who is accepting Medicare patients now.

sushipup.....thank you for info re AARP....I had no idea.

Thanks! I'm glad I found my primary care doctor before I got on Medicare. I did tell Greg that he needs a primary care doctor, for many reasons, and I think he also needs to have a living will or end-of-life statement. I don't know whether he has a will or not, but my brother and I updated ours back in December, and I'm glad we did. Since my brother and I own properties together, we decided to have a living trust (I think that is what it is called) so that if one of us dies, the will won't have to go into probate. I still expect to live another 15 years or so, but I could be wrong.

Joanie, not to disparage AARP, and the supplemental insurance thru them is often the best you can buy. But there are other sources for impartial info on the subject.

As for living a risky lifestyle - I don't think that is even possible in St. George

Lars you can be so funny sometimes, lol.

I live in Utah, though in the suburbs of Salt Lake City. The governor has not set "stay at home" order for the entire state though he has put out a state recommendation to stay at home. Seems like the primary difference is that there is not legal enforcement. Most of the highly populated counties (Salt Lake County, Summit County, etc) have issued legal "stay at home" orders.

Utah is made up of a mixture of cities of varying size as well as small rural towns and communities. The Salt Lake metro area probably has around 1 million people. St. George is a small city several hours away (through rural towns and desert) of around 85k people. Some of the smallest towns have as little as 15 people. I can understand why state government might prefer to have the counties making legal orders based on their individual situations and populations. I'm not an epidemiologist or a political leader so I'm glad I don't have to make that decision. However, the city where I live is definitely not going about business as usual. What your friend is experiencing in St. George is likely very different than Salt Lake City or tiny town of Scofield. Additionally, it is virtually impossible to find any masks here of any kind because of the panic buying, so please try to withhold your judgements about what people are wearing out in public because they may not have options. Many people are doing the best they can.

It is, however, very concerning to me that as little as 2-3 weeks ago a nursing facility anywhere in the USA would have forbidden a health care professional from wearing PPE. A healthcare professional choosing to wear protective gear for the safety of their patients and themselves should never be punished. A good manager of such a facility would have listened to the complaints and explained to the residents why such PPE was for their benefit as well as for the benefit of your friend. Sounds like he made the smart choice to quit such a shoddy operation.

As far as being non-LDS (non-Mormon) in Utah, there are certainly challenges. Smaller towns and smaller cities (like Provo or St. George) are often less liberal about LGBTQ issues as well as unmarried partnership issues. I believe any religion that has a dominant presence in a region may create a culture of differential treatment for members and non-members and for belief systems outside of those fitting the religion. I have experienced some judgement and/or discrimination but I have also experienced very welcoming, open minded LDS people as well. As a young woman who was in a long term relationship with a man but unmarried, it was frightening trying to find an ob/gyn who would treat my physical health without judgement. I don't think your friend is being unreasonable having fears of judgement and discrimination. A doctor/patient relationship is very personal and being open and honest about personal things with a doctor is not always easy. In fact I think the comment earlier about assuming your friend was "living a high risk lifestyle" is a perfect example of the type of judgement and discrimination your friend might experience and probably fears.

Sorry for being so long-winded there. In summary: Utah certainly isn't perfect and is doing some things right and probably some things wrong when it comes to COVID-19. Ultimately your friend is responsible for his own health and well-being. Sounds like he made some choices to protect himself and people above have given some great ideas to help him continue to make good choices by getting health insurance coverage and finding a physician. Good luck! Thanks for being such a wonderful friend to him.

Updating my own post--for Advantage plans, I believe you can enroll during any open enrollment period, not just the initial one, without medical underwriting.

However for supplemental plans I believe that if you want to enroll in them following the initial enrollment period, ie during the annual open enrollment each fall, you will have to be cleared through a medical underwriting process.

Thus it is much more difficult to go from an Advantage plan to a supplement than vice versa.

I feel bad for all healthcare workers now. Sorry your friend was basically forced into retirement. It's crossed mine and a few coworker's minds lately too. We had a meeting yesterday and was told it was okay for us to wear a mask. Really? How are we supposed to do that when we have to talk on the phone? Also was told we are safer at work than at the grocery store. Not when you tell a coworker to return to work when his wife has the virus it isn't. No one is feeling safe right now.

Good luck to your friend in finding a good doctor.

About colonoscopies...the age you should get your first one is actually 50.

Greg has extensive medical training, and so I do think he knows very much about his own health and body, and I think this is why he has not felt the need to have a primary care doctor

I think that is entirely his choice. A separate issue is insurance/medicare: there are times such as God forbid being in a serious automobile accident where all the knowledge in the world won't help and you need help and resources and cannot do anything for yourself.

But I've seen the underbelly of the medical trade, and I've definitely seen doctors who don't go by the rules, and I can empathize and identify with with Greg's choice.

Lars, I just want to wish him well. I hope he can find a suitable physician. Just...all the best!

Oh yes, 50 for a colonoscopy. I had my first one at 50. Not sure why I wrote 60.

67 and completely clueless. He needs to start adulting.

Oh yes, 50 for a colonoscopy. I had my first one at 50. Not sure why I wrote 60.

I recently had my second colonoscopy. Before I had it I mentioned to my 67 year old friend that I would be having the procedure the following week. I was flabbergasted that her response was "I heard those are awful". I resisted getting into it with her and asking why she hasn't had one yet. As far as I'm concerned, even though the prep is unpleasant, if I had to do it every year to make sure that I don't die of colon cancer I'd be happy to do it.

My son-in-law is a pharmacist and he's well trained in the Medicare supplements-so you might suggest your friend speak with a pharmacist as well. Might be the easiest route given the craziness of things in the world these days.

I'm not familiar with Utah, so I can't recommend other areas, but is it possible for him to find a PCP outside of his community? Especially since he's healthy and knows his own health, a drive might not be a bad idea if it makes it easier for him to find LGBTQ friendly providers. I'm sure there are providers in the state!

As to not being allowed to wear PPE-I think that's been the case in a lot of places that have been slow on the uptick in dealing with the social distancing. The west coast primarily is on the forefront, I know in Oregon we're about a week behind California in the stay-at-home orders and school closures, etc. I noticed that many of the retailers that are open here are limiting the number of people who can enter the store, as well as installing sneeze guards at registers. Stores won't bag your groceries if you bring your own bags either. We even went from having gas station attendants to temporarily pumping our own gas, in order to limit exposure for those employees.

@Lars Just wanted to add to the mention of city-data that there are forums where one can absolutely ask for specific advice. There are forums for each state (and regions or cities within) as well as medical and LGB. Some forums are more active than others, but honestly one could ask for recommendations on those forums. Be sure to check private messaging in case someone doesn't want to post the answers publicly on the forum.

.Utah Link (there is a St George and a SLC but also just a plain Utah link. Play around with those- ya never know).

I can't force anyone to get a colonoscopy - I tried that with Kevin when he turned 50, but he had a doctor who told him that he could wait until he was 60. I told him he needed to get a different doctor, and eventually he did, but by then he was 53. His new doctor told him he had to get a colonoscopy immediately because of our family history (grandmother and mother both had colon cancer), but Kevin thought that because he did not eat red meat that he was at lower risk. That turned out not to be the case, and he was diagnosed with colon cancer at his first colonoscopy. I'm still mad at his first doctor for telling him he could wait until 60, and that doctor knew our family history. Greg thinks that because he is vegan now that he is at lower risk, but he has not always been vegan, and I told him that that would not protect him, since Kevin was vegetarian for most of his life. It's easy to find a lot of information that says that a vegetarian diet will reduce the risk of colon cancer, but it certainly does not eliminate it.

BTW, I found Utah to be much less scary than parts of Texas, where I have been actively harassed. Telling the truth, when it may not be pretty, is not the same as bashing.