I like that about the fish! What would I do? Forget the cabinet store, tell my contractor what happened, and move on.

Perhaps you should mention it to your contractor -- you don't need to give him the full-run, just a succinct description of the guy's attitude and he is bad-mouthing him (the contractor) -- I think he should know about it, his reputation is on the line. Let him take it from there, if he so chooses.

Tell your contractor. Maybe don't say specifically what the guy said about him because it's mean and potentially embarrassing--just that the guy spoke badly of him. The rest he should know!

Good luck with the warranty work...and finding a new cabinet co.!

I once worked at a company (not at all cabinetry related) and the first time I watched our company owner interact with clients I was appalled and embarrassed. Sadly being a business owner does not necessarily guarantee good social or business skills. I would suggest find another cabinet company to serve your future needs.

advise the contractor. and advise him that this guy was slandering him as well as airing his dirty laundry.

then, go to Yelp, and leave a review of what you thought about this person and his company.

A bad yelp review can do wonders.

All the above - and count your blessings that this episode enlightened you before you moved ahead with purchasing more products through this company!

You might also mention it when you contact the manufacturer directly regarding the warranty issue. Assuming they are willing to resolve the issue, consider that their reputation is also on the line; he may be creating more ill will with prior customers who will not choose their product as a result.

"My cabinets are polar white with a pewter glaze."

Could you tell us the name of the cabinetry that is peeling? I've just ordered a cabinet with a Polar White color. Now I am nervou it's the same company.

@nhb22. Hanssemm cabinets.

HI, Helaurin93,

I encourage you to share your experience with your contractor. Even the best trade partners don't always stay that way. Since your contractor didn't experience what you did in the showroom, he/she doesn't have a clue unless you tell them.

Thank you so much, helaurin93. Not the same cabinet company.

Good luck in finding a replacement. Steer clear of buying anything from that cabinet store you speak of.

loobab, not necessarily, I've known men just like him. it's not uncommon in certain cultures. I bet I could guess where he's from.

@beth h. I'm not sure if we want to get into a "certain cultures" conversation here, but... you opened the door. The owner appears to be about as European-American ancestry as possible, the store was started by a now-deceased family member decades ago. The company was started back in the 1980's, so it's been around 40-ish years. They like to brag that they supplied "all of the faucets for the Bush White House renovation" (in 1989).

I neglected to mention in my original post that he made a descriptive comment about the ethnicity (Korean) of the people who run/own/operate the cabinetry line that they'd sold me four years ago. I'm pretty sure that he doesn't consider himself a racist, or a bigot.... but... I think his comment, even if he meant it to be well-intended about Koreans, was not appropriate. His comment was that "Koreans are generally nice".

Might be well-intended - but it's right back with when people used to say certain people were "bred to be athletic", or certain people were "made to be smarter", or that people of a certain religion are "all rich", etc. It's just not appropriate.

If he had wanted to say that the people at the cabinet manufacturer were nice, he could have said "the reps from the company, when we dealt with them, were nice". And keep in mind - this is in the same conversation where he said that he'd "had it out with them" and it would be "better to not mention you bought the cabinets from us" to them.

See, that just about proves my point.

That he said the cabinet company sucked, but then launched into his little 'but the people who run it, they are the ethnicity that are generally nice' kind of thing.

Who says that kind of thing any more?

Even if they think it?

And in public??

If that doesn't prove a little white matter function disruption, what does?

I probably shouldn't play armchair psychologist, but the way he talks about cabinet companies and contractors he has worked with in the past make me think borderline personality disorder.

Regardless of his issue, I would run the other way ("When someone shows you who they are, believe them"). I would definitely be looking for a different cabinet company for the new cabinets, and for the warranty issue on the old cabinets I would contact the manufacturer directly.

@loobab Well, if that cabinet company owner is looking to me to try to get him counseling or a medical checkup, or anything like that... sorry. He's presumably got family (it's a family-run business), friends, and coworkers who should be much closer to him than me, as a customer, who beyond this interaction, has had limited contact with this man.

And unfortunately, there are people who still do say things like that these days, and even not too terribly long ago. I've literally broken off contact with certain individuals who, during the past four years or so, have shown their true colors - and they aren't pretty colors, let me say that. I ended up telling one person that he was a moronic caveman (along with a few other choice words).

One of the worst examples that I personally witnessed - about 12 years ago, so we're not talking ancient history - was when, at dinner in a public place, a relative LOUDLY proclaimed that the government should "follow China's example" and force "those people in Harlem" to be sterilized after having one child, because "them <insert derogatory racial term> breed like roaches" - and the person stated this EXACTLY at the moment that the server, who was of obvious African-American ancestry, was setting that person's entree down in front of her!

I was mortified for that poor server, and ended up apologizing over the relative who was still going on about the days when "certain people knew their place". How that server did not choose to accidentally land that entree in the woman's lap, I don't know, because I probably would have. (And if it had - I would sided on the server's side... you know, accidents happen).

And the shame of it all, on top of that - was the server appreciated me standing up for her, but said not to worry about it - she's "used to people like that". No one should be "used to" that kind of treatment.

But there are still a lot of people out there like that :(

@cawaps I am trying to contact the manufacturer. The only number I have goes to a voicemail box that is full, so I can't even leave a message. I've even sent emails to their marketing department which is the only email I've found online for them so far. No response as of yet.

helaurin-I meant w/men in certain cultures the way they think they're the boss of everything and everyone. you don't know where or how he was raised. he appears to be european? lol. that doesn't mean anything. Culture doesn't mean race. When you mentioned the way he treated the poor sales girl, I thought about it. and the way he spoke to you. If you had been another man, he may have treated you differently. I wasn't knocking any race of people, so there's no need for a racial sensitivity lecture. (and it's a bit offensive that you would assume that) I said based on what you described, it could be a certain culture. No need to search for anything derogatory, because I never implied such nonsense. The statement itself is a true fact. I've dealt with more than my share of men from certain cultures who think women are beneath them. too many times to even recount.

But who knows, maybe he does have mental problems too.

I sure wouldn't use that cabinet store. Regardless of the reasons, that was some bad customer service. And also, they don't have the cabinetry you want.

Contact the manufacturer about the warranty and the new cabinets, and be honest. Let them know your previous seller was unwilling to assist in the warranty, and referred you to them. And that they don't carry the cabinet line you want, could the manufacturer recommend good sellers?

Do the same with your contractor. Let them know why you won't/are unable to use that seller anymore. It's up to you if you want to include the commentary about them or not.

“I probably shouldn't play armchair psychologist, but the way he talks about cabinet companies and contractors he has worked with in the past make me think borderline personality disorder.”

No he doesn’t. He is just a straight up A**hole.

I had a customer (worked at big box) we did an install for. Our installer actually sent him to us for the design. He was very rude and verbally abusive towards me and our Customer Order Specialist (a female). I mentioned the interactions with our installer who said he was a really nice guy. I wouldn’t describe him this way at all.

Whoa! Well, obviously, you shouldn't do business with this company. The owner is a jerk and unprofessional. Find another cabinet dealer, and yes, absolutely tell the contractor what your experience was. Tread a bit lightly--for all you know he and this guy are best pals. But make it quite clear you won't be using him given his unresponsiveness and inability to take responsibility.

As for your previous cabinets, do you recall if there was a warranty? If so, for how long is it covered? If you're still within the warranty period, then deal directly with the manufacturer, assuming you still have all your paperwork. But if it isn't covered anymore, then I'm afraid you may have to chalk this up to a bad experience.

helaurin-

I said someone in his family needs to set up an intervention.

That means not you.

The cabinet company owner may well be a jerk and may have always been a jerk.

Only the Shadow knows.

However, one could not be an unmitigated jerk and run a presumably successful business for years and years and have several employees, and contractors and suppliers with whom one did business.

Over the years all these people would have refused to work with him.

The fact that the store owner is now saying that this, that, and the other company and employee and person is now a cheat or incompetent or awful in some way rather implies some recent change in him.

Think of it like a book you are reading, this is a mystery.

Certainly there are people that are sexist, and racist, and rude, and crass and crude.

But if helaurin's portrayal is accurate, this fellow is just too, too, and it may be recent.

People are just mysteries, all.

Maybe the contractor will have some information that will shed light on it.

My curiosity is piqued.

Not that it helps helaurin with her cabinet problem.

@loobab Hopefully I'll talk to that contractor this week. I know he was out hunting last week to fill his freezer.