You could avoid symmetry problems by putting the bar on the kitchen end of the long wall. Then rotate your table 90 degrees so the long side runs parallel to the window, and place it 36" to 40" in from the window. Now your seating area has symmetry, and you have useful bar/buffet on the area that is already "unmatched."

For decor, other people here are better suited to give specific advice. My instinct would be to go for large horizontal pieces that stop no higher than 8 feet up the wall, and a chandelier over the table. That would keep the eye at conversation level, and create a more intimate space around your table. It also keeps focus away from the odd ceiling soffits that don't appear to be long enough to define a full dining space.

Oh wow. I love that idea. I had decided without actually thinking it through or measuring that the table would be too long when we add the leaf but there actually should be plenty of room. I can’t wait to get home and measure. Thank you so much for taking the time to think about this!

The table looks small for the room. Turning it and moving it toward the window might give you room for a dry bar and a serving piece sitting across from each other. Curtains would really help elevate the rooms look. I know they are not in favor but a tall china cabinet on the wall across from the Kitchen but in the dining room would fit nicely.

We will be adding medium to large dry bar

A dry bar for booze & mixing drinks? Or a serving area type to bar?

Are the proposed locations the dotted line areas at the front of the dining room? (Nyet. Would block the windows & look clunky, I fear.)

If there is enough space behind the sink peninsula, why not there? If that is a pony wall behind the sink, you can gain 4-4 1/2" of floor space by removing the pony wall and butting new cabinets up to the back of the existing cabinets. And likely be able to fit 15" deep cabinets there. How wide is that aisle behind the sink?

If not there, then on the kitchen end of the dining room long wall? Rotate the dining table 90 degrees?

Or extend a peninsula on the left side of the wall ovens.

Ci_lantro, I'm pretty sure the dotted line areas are just an indicator of what is going on with the ceiling by the window.

Definitely for booze but I would love to use it for serving etc. as well. A China cabinet across the other side is a great idea. I’m not sure if this is technically called a pony wall but it is our kitchen bar

Thank you all for taking the time to think this through with me. Here is the table turned and an extremely crude drawing of a Bar area 😂. I guess the only issue is that if we mess with adding a chandelier and a built-in type bar & cabinets there (vs a piece of furniture) it makes it so that no future owners of the house can really put their table long-wise ever again.

Moving the chandelier for a different table placement should be very easy. You don't even have to move the junction box, you can just add a longer chain and swag it over to a new location. Built-ins are removable to, as long as you know how to do a little drywall repair. But at 13' wide, you should have plenty of clearance to run the table down the length of the room and still have a bar on that wall. If you're worried, go for 18" deep lowers instead of 24" deep.

How about a cabinet that's shallow but reallllllly long? it can be used to serve drinks and food at the same time. when not in use, put a few items out so it doesn't look empty. The cabinet would add lots of extra storage, and the decorative items could quickly be put in there when you need more room to serve.

Since your window on the right is close to the corner, don't have the cabinet go all the way. Give it some space, and put some plants on either side to fill the gaps.

Like this, but longer and maybe a little deeper (so the top is big enough to set out food):