Diabetes and the way one handles it is incredibly individual. My daughter is a type 1 and the pretty hard and fast rule for her is no liquid sugar (so no soda, juice, real maple syrup, honey, etc). For the most part, if she is home for dinner, we have protein and veggies. Bread and/or starches would be served as a separate option, so no pasta salads or rice with mixed with veggies. This gives her the option to skip the carbs if her sugar is out of whack or eat them if she really wants to. I keep desserts on the lower carb side, usually made with almond flour, a crustless pumpkin pie (or other crustless pie), creme brulee, etc. This works pretty well for her and us, as long as I have enough lead time to know that she is actually coming (or not). I would not over think it too much. You have a pretty good handle on what is within the realm of reason. If there were any definite no-nos for the individual, hopefully they would let you know ahead of time.

I was in a hurry posting before (had to go vote), but Lyfia has good sound ideas. I avoid wheat products, too. Same as the white rice and potatoes. Also, i need to be careful of sugary fruits, such as grapes. And, I use healthful sugar substitutes, as well. My favorite is Anthony’s Erythritol. I buy mine via Amazon.

You are probably not looking for recipes - yet. Nevertheless, this is a dessert I’ve cooked and it is flourless…but far from sugarless. For those of you who deal with diabetes or cooking for a diabetic, would this be acceptable?

https://leitesculinaria.com/103581/recipes-flourless-almond-cake.html

Based on the above, I think I will focus on protein, above-the-ground veggies, and complex carbs.

For dessert I will probably do a pumpkin custard. I know some people have intestinal issues from sugar substitutes, so I won't do that but I might also do berries with unsw whipped cream

Thx everyone for your input.

@bbstx - I wouldn't eat it because of the sugar. Sugar is just too quick and unpredictable for me unless there is a lot of fat in my overall meal too which as I understand it is not a good combination anyways. I've just trained myself to not eat dessert. Over 20 years of this it is now a habit. I don't feel the need for sweets. However salty nuts or other salty food is another story. Need to work on that one.

@mtnrdredux_gw - I think you've made a wise decision. I would try to avoid whole grains though as people say they are supposedly better, but compared to other complex carbs they have a much bigger effect and require more insulin for me than say beans or peas for the same amount of carbohydrates.

So Lyfia, what would be your fave complex carbs for a side dish?

It's just one meal, don't sweat it. Because of a certain type of diabetes that his father died of from complications, DH became T2, and took pills along with following a good meal plan. a few years ago he started taking insulin shots, and he's still T2. Both men had/have a healthy body shape and no matter how much they followed the rules, their sugar would either sky rocket or go too low.

Make the dessert of your choice.

Portion Control is very important. As the hostess and not being obvious, monitor how he eats. If he ate like a pig you might ask the group if they'd like to take a walk after dinner and get him to go along.

It's important to serve more foods with protein in case the guest is a picky eater and doesn't like the main course if it's meat. Adding more protein doesn't mean adding more meat.

Deviled Eggs. Great protein source. Now he can't eat the whole tray or eat them every day but they're a great dish to serve with the meal.

Sweet potatoes are usually good for diabetics, as long as it's not a marshmallow type casserole.

Asparagus is a good side.

You're giving him good choices, it's up to him to make them.

"Based on the above, I think I will focus on protein, above-the-ground veggies, and complex carbs."

Good choice. Just be aware that some "above-the-ground" veggies can be starchy too such as pumpkin, acorn squash, butternut squash and corn, peas and beans (not green).

For dessert, remember dark chocolate is lower in sugar...maybe a dark chocolate and grand marnier sauce over fruit? Berries tend to be lower sugar....

Hmm, Annie, good point. Maybe I will serve some squares of dark chocolate? I like whipped cream because I make it with zero sugar, just vanilla.

I will probably make a salad, a green veggie, and the "best" non-green veggie; hence my question about for Lyfia. Webmd suggests baked sweet potatoes are moderate choice.

Your body needs carbs. But you want to choose wisely. Use this list as a guide.

Best Choices

• Whole grains, such as brown rice, oatmeal, quinoa, millet, or amaranth
• Baked sweet potato
• Items made with whole grains and no (or very little) added sugar

Worst Choices

• Processed grains, such as white rice or white flour
• Cereals with little whole grains and lots of sugar
• White bread

My general approach is that I hope this person is pleasantly surprised that this meal works a bit better for them than other dinner parties they have attended, not that it is necessarily a textbook offering or something no one else can enjoy.

As far as dessert goes, my daughter's fiancee usually just has a bite or two of hers - he really isn't big on sweets. As other's have said, it is just one meal, but like you, I hate the thought of anyone leaving my table hungry. I'm sure you'll pull off a stellar meal.

You are sweet, Neko. I always use my guests need or prefs as a starting point, honestly partly to make things simpler by giving me some constraints before I go off trying to make a menu.

I'm type 2 diabetic. It really is individual because one person could have their 'numbers' in great shape and so could splurge on a high carb side dish. Another will have to pass, but could do with a broccoli, brussel sprout type dish instead. It's an awesome hostess that remembers this about her guests. same idea with dinner rolls, desert, etc. It's great for us to have choices, when possible.

I always use my guests need or prefs as a starting point, honestly partly to make things simpler by giving me some constraints before I go off trying to make a menu.

My feelings exactly. I can ruminate for weeks over a menu, not because I am anxious but because there are so many possibilities. We have had the same tight circle of friends for many years, so it's easy; A doesn't like shrimp, B doesn't do spicy... C only drinks red. I view it as a fun challenge. It's much easier than cooking for guests with unknown food preferences. All that being said, when I am entertaining adults, I assume that they will graciously make their choices to suit their preferences. I would never plate for people that I don't know very well.

It's much easier than cooking for guests with unknown food preferences.

Yes! We had new neighbors over once. I always ask, do you have any dietary needs or strong preferences/dislikes Answer: no.

So, I served veal chops. They don't eat veal. I wanted to hit them over the head. Several years on, I have found entirely different reasons to dislike these people, LOL.

I've had that happen too...nope no problems with food until they get here and I find one has an allergy to walnuts. Or another with no problems, we eat anything...until they get here and find that one doesn't eat zucchini which I served. Grrrr.

Have you ever cooked with black or Forbidden rice? it is delicious, beautiful , and healthy , Low glycemic https://www.webmd.com/diet/health-benefits-black-rice

I serve this Black Rice and Yam salad to rave teviews. https://www.wholefoodsmarket.com/recipes/forbidden-rice-salad-bell-peppers

I originally had it at WF and found the recipe online many years ago.

I was reared that you eat what you are served, graciously, unless you are allergic. My kids do the same. I have never heard of a zucchini allergy, though I could be wrong. Grow up people.

OOh, oly I love black rice!

As others have shared with way more authority and experience than I have, what diabetics can/can't eat depends on so many factors that you as a host can't predict .. even the old glycemic index isn't favored as much as it used to be. I LOVED the glycemic index because it helped me to tailor what I thought was a more healthful way of eating unrelated to "dieting". I am unlikely to ever completely abandon it as I wasn't using it as a diabetic.. I was using it to prevent blood sugar spikes and to manage appetite. As a "scientist by nature not profession" I loved the concept of glycemic index and especially food pairings. Anyhow.. i am way off path of what I wanted to share (again!).

This time of year I LOVE white sweet potatoes -- they have the high fiber qualities of sweet potatoes (so generally embraced in diabetic diets) and are loaded with nutrients and antioxidants ... plus they are not as sweet! They can be hard to find but I would guess you could find them in your area.

Whether white or orange, I like my sweet potatoes to be savory-- no marshmallows or cinnamon! I usually bake and mash and then add garlic, pepper and a touch of cayenne and sometimes chives or scallions. I really like the flavor paired with meat...and I especially love them with roasted brussels sprouts for a vegetarian meal.

I am sure you have your meal planned so really just taking the opportunity to share my love for them-- especially because I can only ever find them in the fall!

Interesting, I will have to look for them. I have never liked anything on yams (what I usually buy) but butter. I didn't grow up with marshmallow. I do like TJ spiced candied pecans on them, though.

I like spicy-- but I don't add so much cayenne to make them "spicy" just enough to balance the sweetness.

Regardless of color, I also like roasted sweet potatoes with rosemary, garlic and onion. Onion is about as sweet as I'll go.

Ive never liked marshmallows -- the only thing I like them in is rice crispy treats or holly cookies (basically rice crispy treats with cornflakes). I hang my head in shame as I admit that LOL.

@mtnrdredux_gw I'll think about it. Will be at a conference for a couple of days so won't be fast to respond, but I tend to like roasted veggies like brussel sprouts with a balsamic reduction drizzled over it. Bean dishes or where beans are mixed into a salad can work really well too thanks to resistant starches in them.

Sweet potatoes are not nice to me, so I tend to avoid them. They act just like a regular potato for me.

I also meant to mention that I make the black rice salad with the yam type sweet potatoes. Dark orange like Garnet yams. From what I know, they have a lower GI count than the lighter, traditional sweet potatoes. I think the white yam/sweet potatoes are the Japanese yams or sweet potatoes and have a higher GI count, too.

im loathe to cook brussels sprouts for dinner guests as they are so malodorous

My sister is a T2 diabetic, but she’s traveling…. take a look here for ideas: EatingWell Diabetes-Friendly Holiday Sides

Mom of a T1D. Our meals often have multiple green vegetables. A big green salad, and steamed green beans and roasted broccoli are often at the same meal.

My son used to take photos of his plate and send them to me and ask if I agreed with his carb count SWAG.

Yeah, that is extreme for a dinner party with other guests IMHO. From my experience this person eats everything, but they are more careful around certain foods with portions.

As I said, I am just trying to make a meal that is pleasantly easier for them to navigate. Something where they think "oh good" rather than "hmm, what should I do."

I realize I'm very late to this conversation.

A cheese course could be a nice substitute for dessert. My sister usually bakes something (cake, pie, cookies) when someone in her D&D group has a birthday. To celebrate one of the diabetic members of the group, she instead put together a cheese plate that sounded like it went over well. In addition to crackers, she had apple slices that could be the foundation to eat the cheese, and she had nuts and olives and things like that as well.

@localeater that is how we approach our family meals -- a tradition my dad started many years ago because of me. I was a vegetarian for a number of years in my 20s and 30s .. and also (please don't be shocked), I won't eat filet mignon or ham which are two family favorites but I will happily make a plate of veggies and sides. I don't think he condoned my choices really lol... but it meant I was more likely to come home (when I lived outside of the area) for holidays and celebrations.

@Funkyart I knew we were kindred spirits. I remeber going to diners with friends in HS after dances and such. They’d get a burger, I’d get a vegetable plate.

Just to clarify, she wasn't allergic to zucchini, but just didn't like it and wouldn't eat it. Odd I know. I had made my veggie medley (sautéd onion, garlic, yellow squash and zucchini with tomatoes and basil) and she ate it all but picked out the zucchini bits!

Never heard of white sweet potatoes....I'll have to look and try them.

Sorry, but to me, cheese is never dessert. I mean I know people have it that way, but not for me...I want something sweet.

For dessert, how about gingerbread with unsweetened whipped cream? It's less sugary than other desserts and ginger is supposed to help control blood sugar levels. And it's perfect for the season.

The traditional dessert for diabetics always used to be angel food cake...I remember serving it often for my Dad when he became diabetic.

she ate it all but picked out the zucchini bits!

Rude in my book. Was she 8? People.

cheese is never dessert.

Oh i think it can be, but prob. only for foodies. I have had cheese plates with honeycomb and preserves. If you include say, a neufchatel and some sweet or rich crackers, you have veered into cheesecake-esque bites.

I am not even a cheese eater ... or a foodie for that matter.. but I had an amazing shared tapa a number of years ago that is still on my mind.. Manchego cheese, lavender honey and slices of tart green apple that I think would make a wonderful cheese dessert.

It's on my mind because I have been thinking about adding lavender honey to a gift basket I am working on.

ETA: @Annie Deighnaugh I LOVE gingerbread-- just the old fashioned cake with a light dusting of powdered sugar. I hate to admit that I always used the box mix -- do you have a recipe you love?

I understand on the Brussel sprouts, but it is the one dish that I've found never has anything left and people are disappointed when it is empty. I often bring this one though so haven't had to deal with the smell as the gathering is elsewhere.

To be honest we usually do casual entertaining when we do any (introverts here) and it tends to be more of a variety and buffet style so people can pick and choose what they want and casual to fit many palates. So it is hard for me to think of one side that works for a different style entertaining. Part of this too is because my immediate family are very picky eaters.

One side dish that I've taken with me a few times that people have loved have been Pepper Jack Cauliflower. I will add bacon on top depending on the gathering. Vegetarian I skip it and I will also sprinkle some chives for color and because it works well with the flavor, but I guess parsley could work too.

https://alldayidreamaboutfood.com/low-carb-slow-cooker-pepper-jack-cauliflower/

Another is sauteed green beans (the long thinner ones) with some bacon and nuts (almonds or pecan).

Cilantro Lime cauliflower rice is another one most like - or Mexican style cauliflower rice - or saffron cauliflower rice. Cilantro though doesn't fit all palates so may not be a good option.

Spaghetti Squash is a really good option too - I think someone else mentioned it. Mine is just plain baked though so no advice on how to serve it.

A medley of roasted vegetables would work great too, pretty in color, tasty and also allows for skipping eating anything that a person would find doesn't work well for them.

Diakon radish au gratin or scalloped are faves of mine, but very rich.

Daikon radish "potato" cakes or rösti. Can do similar to a hash brown cake or mashed where you mix with eggs, seasonings, etc. and fry into small "pancakes". Either may seem to casual though. Using a plätt järn makes nice and round ones, but still more casual unless you plate it to look more fancy.

Based on comments above, my menu was as follows:

1. Brussels sprout salad starter

2. Barbacoa taco buffet with lettuce leaves (or flour tortillas), refried beans, fresh pica de gallo, shredded carrot and daikon, lime wedges, avocado, sour cream and cheese. All served do-it-yourself.

For dessert, I had a cheese plate with apples and grapes and digestive biscuits. I also roasted pineapple slices in the oven w rum, butter and brown sugar (ice cream or creme fraiche optional).

It worked out well. A number of people, not just the person who is diabetic, opted for lettuce tacos, too. Everyone partook of the cheese plate and the pineapple dessert . My diabetic friend commented that they love pineapple upside down cake but can't eat it; they were very happy to indulge in roasted pineapple with just a dollop of ice cream.

That all sounds lovely. I adore grilled pineapple, that was a great choice.

Sounds perfect!

Thanks, everyone, for your input.

BTW by serving raw sprouts I avoided the experience of welcoming guests with a stench of cabbage. Was happy with this recipe:

HEALTHY BRUSSELS SPROUT CHOPPED SALAD WITH CITRUS SHALLOT VINAIGRETTE

https://livelytable.com/shaved-brussel-sprout-salad/

Everything sounds wonderful ... and I especially love that the menu didn't call out diabetes-friendly.

I am drooling at the thought of roasted pineapple with a dollop of ice cream!

Funky, it really is so good. I got the idea from a Lidia B video, but I used a lot less of everything. I soaked the pineapple in fresh squeezed OJ. When I baked it, I just brushed it with the MELTED butter, sprinkled on brown sugar and then drizzled the rum. The key is cooking it long enough that it concentrates the flavor.

Glad it turned out so well. Sounds delicious!

It all sounds delicious and fun! When’s the next party??? 😎

Sounds like an awesome menu and I may steal it as I think it is something all in my family would eat except the cheese part. I think the best part though is that your diabetic friend got to not feel singled out and it seems like it was something others wanted to eat in a diabetic friendly way as well.

I do have to make that Brussel sprout salad no matter what.

Beautifully done! What a nice menu you served.

Sounds great and I saved the brussel sprout salad recipe.

Did you shave them? It did mention buying shaved- as I am not too swift with the knife, I might look into that.

(I have never seen shaved for sale but maybe I haven't looked.)

@salonva - my rural HEB has the shaved Brussel sprouts so if you live urban I would think the grocery store has it.

My local grocer and TJs both carry them.

However, I do not buy them presliced. I don't think they are as good/fresh that way. And since you are eating them raw in a lightly dressed salad, they need to be good.

I buy baby sprouts and use a mandoline (very carefully). I once made a recipe that called for pulling apart the leaves by hand and it looked pretty, but lacked crunch (and was a total PITA).

I appreciate that. True stories.

One Thanksgiving I was cutting brussel sprouts and really did a number on my finger. I tried everything- cold water, ice, raising my hand, it just would not stop. Finally one of the medical people in the family asked if I had super glue. (after cleaning and all) and I was fine.

Then DH who uses a blood thinner used a mandoline the night before July 4........ Not a good time. Just so you know, most of the urgent care places were closed. We did find one but it really took them a long time and various trials to get it to stop.

So I have this major fear.

I didn't see the shaved brussel sprouts today but I did see halved. I know it's better if they are freshly cut. I didn't buy any because I may have talked myself out of trying it at least for sure not for Thanksgiving.

But it looks and sounds so delicious.

Yes, I hear you ... every time i take out the mandoline, DH gets on high alert!

You could keep an eye out. If they look scrupulously fresh (or maybe ask your grocer when they get them in), the pre-sliced ones will be more than fine. But I often see them looking a tad bedraggled.

You may also be able to put them whole in a food processor; I think chopped would work fine.

I cut off the top of one of my knuckles with a mandoline. Fortunately, my surgeon cousin lived across the street and could put a pressure bandage on it. I now have a cut resitant glove I wear when I use it. You know where I got it.