I would go better with something lighter from your stones without too much drama.

Use the same paint color as the walls, OR, use the great colors suggested by Maureen and Beverly. A bright white will be wrong for this wall because it won’t relate to anything. The side walls OR the stone need to be acknowledged.

Thank you for the lovely suggestions here. I love the open shelves and the color suggestions. I was trying to keep away from Kendal Charcoal because of the darkness and I’m done with too much grey. I am working with a husband who is driving me nuts with this and wanting to keep those damn doors on too. He might just come home one day and see that I’ve taken a sledgehammer to it.

I would probably paint it the wall color to blend it in.

Paint the cabinets and the walls same color.

I would definitely figure out what white was used on the other trim in your home in order to continue that into this room.

I also feel like the wainscoting that is already on the walls does not work with the cabinets/fireplace.

I would not paint the cabinets white - that would make them look like they were from the 90s - it would be better to listen to Home Interiors above - paint them the same color as the wall.

I agree with Dani. The basic problem is that the cabinets and fireplace are at odds with the rest of the room in style. But I don't think paint is going to help that.

Either de frou-frou the moldings in the room--remove wainscot & crown--or rip & replace the fireplace facade and rip the shelving or replace the doors to flow with the wainscot & crown.

Depends on the style of the rest of the house.

Will say that the wood on the shelving works nicely with the floors. Painting it gray/ charcoal would be a huge mistake.

I think your husband needs to reconsider that fireplace..looking again you have lovely wainscoting and beautiful crown molding very classic, timeless the only thing out of place is the fireplace…..a trend long gone…curious why 3 of the exact same coffee table???

He will not budge on that thing. I’m getting to the point where I feel ill looking at it. It’s an eye sore. My only hope is that he will agree to have the sone painted a lighter tone. There are four of those tables in the room. They are basically a continuation of the fireplaces dated stone. One on either side of the couch, a coffee table and one behind the couch. This is what happens when you meet a bachelor who has already decorated his home. We are married a long time now but it’s very difficult for me to make changes to the dated choices he made over 20 years ago.

Oh my! bachelor furniture...that is crazy, you need to make it both of yours..work on him! have him read all the comments maybe he will come around.

He also wants a darker color for the upper wall and a bright white for the bottom half instead of having them flow together with the same color .Send help

Amen! He says he asks people and they agree with his choice to keep the fireplace and plans for a two tone wall. Aka other men and a painter guy. Same guys probably have beautiful homes because their wives pick the decor.

Oh no! wish I was there to have a little one on one design decor decusion with him!

Is there another room in the house that hubby can decorate so you can do the living room? One that he will clean and maintain? He’s already had his say in this room by what is there now. I gave my hubby free reign of the TV/den room which allowed me to change up the living room.

Just want to add some pics to show the stone wall outside that hubby wants to incorporate the look inside 😵‍💫. The pic with the white built in is our kitchen built in which is in the same style as the living room painted simply white.

So his idea is to carry the earthy look inside as to why he wants to keep the stone fireplace. Someone had asked above.

Sometimes sharing this thread can help convince a spouse that professional designers are giving contrary advice. 🤞🏻

Oh dear, sounds like some sort of compromise is in order. As others have suggested simplest thing would be to paint wall + cabinet on both sides of fireplace all same color, not a white or light color, but a mid tone to minimize contrast between that and stone fireplace, AND also darker colors recede while whites come forward and in this case would stick out like the proverbial sore thumb. It doesnt have to be the gray shown in renderings above, theres some beiges/greiges in there as well. And compromise could be you get to take off those dang glass doors and have a nice open display there instead of too many cluttery looking doors.

The stone veneer on the FP is very poorly done. There is at least one missing chunk on the corner next to the firebox, many of the corner miters don't match up and it looks like at least one spot where there is mastic/ glue showing in a joint. But, if the hubby likes it and just won't change anything...

The best thing you can do is literally close the doors on the room. Add some semi sheer or lightly opaque curtains on the French doors and keep them closed.

Then find something else to think about.

I think Maureen's color scheme is on point. I would not paint the cabinets since they are a cognac color that is popular now and blends well with gray.

Paint the crown molding and lower half wall the white color in your kitchen. Maybe see if your husband would agree to remove the picture frame molding.

Paint the top wall a gray to match your fireplace/couch. I think the BM Kendal Charcoal or maybe SW agreeable gray. I know you said you are tired of gray, but I think you need it to pull in the fireplace.

I would replace the cabinet knobs and ceiling fan with black. I would go with a cognac, white, gray, black color scheme.

You husband seems to be handy so maybe he could replace the top of the coffee and end table with wood. I think the tile is too much with the fireplace.

Below is a color scheme I think would work with your room.

Cognac Leather Good Colour for Warming Up Black and White Decor (pinterest.com)

I happen to agree with your husbands concept. I believe indoor and outdoor spaces should complement each other and give you that cohesive feeling.

The problem is that usually we determine the architectural style of the home and then create the patio and outdoor entertainment spaces match the house.

Your home is quite light and bright and formal with the crown molding and wainscoting, the white kitchen. the arched windows.

The landscape is lovely, but it isn't at all formal.

You don't typically wear a silk blouse and pearls with a pair of jeans or sweatpants.

Does he wear a tie and dress shirt with jeans or sweatpants?

You may be better off making some changes outside to add formal touches than trying to force the informal, more rustic stone and furnishings into the formal interior space.

Get white, more formal furniture for the exterior space. Add some white planters and use similar planters inside with some nice green plants. Add some green to the living space with plants and touches of green in the area rug and throw pillows. Use the interior furniture color for the throw pillows/cushions on the exterior furniture.

I don't know the dynamics of your household. I have one friend who has lived with their SO for over 30 years, but their SO bought the house before they moved in together. He does not have a key to the house. He pays her x dollars a month to live there. Her house, her rules. The daughter of one of my closest friends married a multi millionaire that is 10 years her senior. She was poor, but very pretty. She had two children when she met him. He got her a gym membership, a trainer, paid for a tummy tuck and breast lift, paid for her children to go to the top schools and have private tutors. He tells her what to wear, how he wants her hair cut, how to behave and she has zero say in anything regarding where they live or how they spend their time together. I have a neighbor who is plain (not Amish or Mennonite, but wears a bonnet and plain dresses below the knee. . . ) She can't come over to my garden and pick flowers or tomatoes for her home without first asking her husband. ( I grow more than I can use and let my neighbors share.)

They all seem quite happy with their arrangements.

I would not be happy.

when I read your statement

He says he asks people and they agree with his choice to keep the fireplace and plans for a two tone wall. Aka other men and a painter guy.

My thoughts were Do these men pay any of your bills? Does your husband sleep with these men? If not they really don't have say in this debate.

I could not be in a relationship where I couldn't have at least an equal say in the design decisions. My husband didn't want a say in any of the design decisions and that suited me just fine.

Maybe pick one of the lighter brown tone out of the fireplace and matches closer to the cabinets? That would make things flow better.

I think painting the top and bottom two different colors would break up the room.

I'm surprised no one has mentioned lighting yet! It's usually the first thing people on the forums say. Anyway, I don't think the built-ins are the problem. Is the top of them painted a different color than the other walls? It looks that way from the pictures on my comp. If so make them match the walls. Maybe bring in a color on the bottom half of the cabinets something in a blue-gray or sagey green to bring in the cool colors of nature? Maybe some tall ferns in front of the taller side cabinets? I like the fireplace but the wood coloring is off. Maybe replace with a darker wood? Painting them white is wrong imo.

WHITE WISP for the walls; CHANTILLY LACE for the trim and cabinets (semi-gloss finish) and the ceiling (flat finish)

First thing you should consider in the room is painting the walls below the chair rail all one color with the trim so that it looks the way it is supposed to look… like wainscotting. Then consider painting the same color on the builtins. First try one side with the paint going all the way to ceiling and then the other side with wall portion color to see which look you like best. Dont let the dark grays throw you off by thinking you need super dark paint on cabinets…there are plenty of light tones in the stone facade…..or, you can paint builtins completely different color than trim and it can be a “slightly” darker color pulled from tones of stone. A beautiful off white color for walls is White Duck by Sherwin Williams. Very neutral and looks nice against white trim.

Totally agree with the Kendall Charcoal for your built-ins, not only will it be a link to your kitchen with the dark island but it gives a more modern vibe to the room. As mentioned by others, I would remove the moulding on the wall, and replace the ceiling fan with a contemporary style in black.

Sorry: "minority perspective". The overall feel, from the photo, is "darkish", and maybe the bigger picture is a need for 'lightening-up' -- however you accomplish that; maybe a combination of lighting, and the 'right white'.... (P.S. I am also tired of pop-culture gray!)

Listen to the professionals, go darker. Curious as to style of house, because the wainscoting and crown molding to me doesn't belong? Honestly I would make him read the thread then cut him off till he sees a different point of view, 20 years of marriage means furniture is outdated and needs replaced if he loves those tables use them outside! My in laws have similar tables, they are heavy. My husband lets me decide as well, he gives input but frankly, his taste is similar to your husbands. we are 42 years together, compromise works, lol.

@Lynne, my house and id say it’s a craftsman style was designed by my husband. He is very good at that and I believe he did a wonderful job. However he lacks in the decorative aspect as most men do and I feel he wants to hold on to old things because of sentimental value and he’s a man so dark and earthly are usually their go to. The front of the house has beautiful wooden double doors. This is the back of the house. I can’t take a pic of the front because there are trucks covering the driveway and entry. Good for you to be able to make all the design decisions. You are very a very lucky. I picked the colors of the kitchen cabinet refacing and the paint in there and the kids rooms and furniture but that’s about it.

The back of our house

Found this pic in an email I got. It made me think of you with the coloring and all so I thought I would post. It might be the idea you are going for, in which case maybe changing out the doors on the built-in would give you what you are after.

The fireplace is an eyesore!

Go with the Kendall Charcoal vs cutting up the visual height with 2 tone!

Update: built in was pained in Chantilly Lace and wall is soft Chamois. Stone needs to be lightened with hubby finally agreed by compromising that I allow the doors to be left on. I love the way the built ins came out. Soft chamois does like lime green a lot of the time on my wall so not happy with that and think I may need to repaint. Thank you all for the wonderful inputs and ideas.

After painting

@Jim Graham, I I’ve your suggestion of white wisp for the wall and to keep the built ins the same color as the trim. I painted the walls white chamois and they look green unfortunately. I want to try white wisp as you recommended. This is a pic of both the color i chose and white wisp next to each other. Do you think white wisp will pull green also as i do have a lot of greenery outside my windows.

I'm not a fan of the white- you've really cut up the focal wall. Needs to be closer to the stone color and the entire wall would "pop"

@teresabar13 the stones will be pained in softer tones similar to some of these. That’s the next phase of the project. First id like to get the wall color right before I get the stones painted to it flows together.

Amanda have you painted the stone yet? Looking good so far!

@Hellogardener yes the stone was painted. I am happy with the way it came out.

Amandaf24…poped in to see any update…and WOW you did it! looks really nice and so much more open and full of light!

It looks so good!

So fresh and crisp - lovely!

Wow. That is one fantastic paint job! It is so subtle and well done!

Looks like you put up new stone? Looks good.

@ Home interiors with ease., thank you! No the stone was painted. That sample I’ve had for a long time since we purchased the stone about 12 yrs ago. I showed it to the painter as an example of how light I wanted my stone painted with a little less yellow.

Looks great.

That is one talented painter!