The Polite House: How Can I Kindly Get Party Guests to Use Coasters?

Here’s how to handle the age-old entertaining conundrum to protect your furniture — and friendships

Lizzie PostAugust 17, 2016

Houzz Contributor. Lizzie Post is co-host of the Awesome Etiquette podcast http://www.infiniteguest.org/awesome-etiquette/, and an author and spokesperson for the Emily Post Institute. She is a co-author of Emily Post’s Etiquette 18th edition, Emily Post’s Great Get-Togethers, The Etiquette Advantage in Business, and Emily Post’s Wedding Etiquette 6th edition http://emilypost.com/books/.

Planning Pretty

Dear Lizzie,

How do I get people to use coasters at my house party without looking like I’m out of my mind, running around putting coasters down for people all night?

Villa Decor

Unless your guests are in the habit of using coasters, you may need to do some reminding until they simply know that at your house, coasters are necessary. Of course, start by having coasters out and available for people to use. Forget about displaying them in a stack — that makes them seem a part of the decor, not something to be used.

Instead, put them out on the tables ahead of time so that people may be a bit more likely to set their drink on one. (Sheer personal observation here; a search for “beverage coaster use studies” came up empty, although I did find some very cool-looking coasters.)

Sarah Greenman

Offering guests coasters rather than asking that they use one is often a gentler yet direct way of getting guests in the habit of using them at your house. “Rick, here let me get you a coaster” has a nicer sound to it than “Rick, please use a coaster.”

You may still find yourself doing a bit of running around offering coasters, but as your more regular guests see that you’re always providing coasters and encouraging guests to use them, they’ll get in the habit of using coasters at your home.

What’s your question? To submit a question on etiquette around the house for Lizzie Post, send an email with the subject line “The Polite House” to edit@houzz.com.

More home etiquette advice:
‘No shoes’ policy and breaking up with contractors
Dogs at house parties
Noisy neighbors
Welcome gifts

Comments (92)

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Melania

4 years ago

Great tip on not placing coasters in stacks, but individually. I do this too :)

PRO

Urban Futons - Dr. Futonberg

4 years ago

This is why I advocate the use of futons instead of sofas because of these clumsy guests. The great thing about futons is that it's very customizable in the sense that you can choose your frame, mattress and removable cover. In case your guests stain the sofa, no worries, you can easily remove the cover and machine wash or dry clean. Now I understand that there are sofas that have removable slip cover cushions, however, what if you stain the arms or the sides. You can't remove that. But it's very difficult to stain a wooden futon frame. Learn more about the beauty and value of a futon.

Read about why futons are better than conventional sofas when it comes to longevity and maintenance.

http://futonsofabedrecommendations.blogspot.com/2016/10/how-long-will-sofa-last-compared-to.html

frwebb

3 years ago

I have bought or made a table cover for each table in the rooms I use to entertain, color coordinated to the decor. If I will have too many guests to personally set their drinks down on coasters and keep an eye on them afterwards, I cover all the tables in advance so I, and my guests, can relax.