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plant swap mailing list?

21 years ago

Hey --

I subscribed to the East TN plant swap mailing list, but for some reason I got unsubbed this morning -- with no explanation. What's up?

Comments (19)

  • 21 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    I don't know what happened. I got a notice from about it and wondered why you were leaving.
    Are you running anti-spam programs? It may be bouncing list messages. That would turn off future e-mails to you, but shouldn't unsubscribe you.
    Try signing up again and making sure the "from" address is on the "OK" list of any spam controls.

  • 21 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Hmmmm. I'll check the earthlink site and see if it bounced anything. Thanks for the suggestion!

  • 21 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Well, I couldn't find anything that would've made any messages bounce. I'll try signing up again, and we'll see what happens!

  • 21 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    I don't have a clue either. I'm sorry, try joining up again. I had emailed you recently asking if you were coming to the swap, didn't get a reply but figured you were busy :o)

    Cheryl

  • 21 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Here's the link..

    Here is a link that might be useful: East TN Plant Swap

  • 21 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Hey --

    I checked the plant swap archives, and I had not received ANY of those April messages -- so something is definitely making the posts to me bounce. Hmmm. Well, if it happens again I'll try subbing under a different email addy.

  • 21 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    O.K. Amazon doc has asked me to do this in public, but I don't want to get banned from GW. She will not be coming to my East TN plant swap, and if anyone would like to know why they can email me privately. I asked if we could act like adults and not do this publicaly but I have her email that requests that I do so.

    Cheryl

  • 21 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Why have you banned me, Cheryl?

  • 21 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    you know very well why. Why on earth you would want to bring it public is only a childish fling on your part. This was best dealt with between you and I in private. I do not want someone at the swap I have worked so hard at that sends me emails which say they suppose that even a rude person like myself would HAVE to behave in public spaces. I have long ago apologized for my rude email to you ( which was almost 2 years ago !), and have enjoyed a long stay here on the Tennessee forum, and made many friends. Since it is my swap, I do believe I can say that I do not want someone who harbers any ill will towards me at it. Again it was your own email which said to me "if you want to ban me from the swap, you'll have to do it in public." I asked you not to, because I don't believe something like this belongs in a public forum. Now you've got it, and I suppose, knowing you, you're going to go on and on about it. I really don't care anymore.

    Cheryl

  • 21 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    "you know very well why. Why on earth you would want to bring it public is only a childish fling on your part."

    Actually, I for one believe that it's very important to let people know the *real* reason that I was banned, rather than allowing you to continue to defame me and my character by remaining silent.

    "This was best dealt with between you and I in private. I do not want someone at the swap I have worked so hard at that sends me emails which say they suppose that even a rude person like myself would HAVE to behave in public spaces."

    Cmon, now, Cheryl. Please stop twisting the truth.

    Here's the real scoop: essentially, Cheryl is banning me because I didn't want to correspond with her through private email. You see, roughly a year and a half or so ago Cheryl got very angry with me when I wouldn't anwer a bunch of questions she fired at me through email. After I failed to answer her interrogations she called me names, said things like nobody else liked me either, implied that I was probably a troll or some sort of evil person, and so on. In other words, she was extremely rude to me. Cheryl admits to this rude behavior. We may have slightly different memories of the exact details of the exchanges, but we agree on their essence.

    Naturally, I didn't have any desire to repeat that experience. And, in fact, I have never (in at least the last couple of years) emailed Cheryl at all -- except in reply to mail FROM Cheryl. So, when Cheryl sent me a private email a few days ago, I didn't answer it. Then she sent me another email today, *insisting* that I answer her and bringing up her old attacks on me. Note that *she* brought up our old dispute, not me. In fact, I never planned to mention or refer to those old attacks in any way, ever again -- but Cheryl did that, and insisted on a response. Since she insisted on a response in her second email I did respond, and explained why I didn't wish to take part in private conversations with her -- but I also specifically explained that I was happy to be polite and friendly in public.

    Obviously, that wasn't good enough for Cheryl.

    Now -- I hope that everyone understands that I have not done anything to deserve getting banned for. I am not a dishonest or unpleasant person to be around, to work with, to purchase or trade plants with, or anything else that is relevant to a swap. Of course, I will not come to the swap since Cheryl doesn't want me there. Now that the truth is here in print, I am happy to not rain on her parade. I know she's put a lot of work into the swap -- and no matter how unfairly she may have treated me personally, there's no reason to make everyone at the swap uncomfortable!

    On the other hand, I do hope that I get to meet many of you in person at other events around this end of the state. If you ever take part in Knox County Master Gardener activities, volunteer at the UT Gardens, or anything similar in this area -- look me up! In the meantime, I hope to carry on many more pleasant conversations with all of you right here on Gardenweb. :-)

  • 21 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Now..if anyone would like to know the real truth, email me. I've kept all her emails. Really Doc...you are a pot stirrer aren't you ?

    Cheryl

  • 21 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    I asked you questions that time Doc because you wanted me to meet you in person and I felt like we should know SOMETHING about each other before we did that. You didn't like that, and you were rude to me, which of course I took offense to and was rude back. I saw that you joined MY mailing list so I emailed you, welcomed you, and asked if you were coming to the swap. When I didn't hear from you I sent you another email today asking you not to hold grudges, because what had happened between us was long ago , I had apologized ( and you didn't by the way ). Next thing I know I'm getting an email from you saying that while you didn't want to email me in private, you had no problem with showing up at a public sight where even I'd have to behave in front of other people ( I've got that email my dear ).
    I've also got the email you sent me saying that I'd HAVE to take this public if I was going to "ban" you from the swap. So you stirred the pot, you apparently can't accept apologies, and now you're trying to defame my name on this forum ? And you've been gone how long ?
    I've put alot of time and effort into this swap, you've just come along at the last minute and I will NOT let you spoil it for everyone else.

    Cheryl

  • 21 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Sigh.

    Cheryl -- I've got those emails too, remember? Yes, I insisted that you ban me publicly -- specifically to prevent any private whispering campaign where I couldn't defend myself.

    No, I did not say "where even I'd have to behave in front of other people". My precise words were:

    ----------

    "Cheryl --

    I'd rather not bring the subject up at all, but since you insist --

    You were extremely rude to me in private email. I don't have much desire to hold private conversations with people who have been so offensive. However, I don't have any problem with being friendly to such people in public arenas, where they are more likely to mind their manners.

    If you find the situation uncomfortable for you, then bar me from the swap. Otherwise, relax and have fun. "

    ----------

    You said: "I asked you questions that time Doc because you wanted me to meet you in person and I felt like we should know SOMETHING about each other before we did that."

    For heaven's sake. We were talking about meeting at a daylily festival, or perhaps a local nursery. Not some dark and isolated corner of the world.

    Now, please move on. As I've said repeatedly -- I never would have brought up this subject at all. You insisted on doing that, so we've done it. Now let's get back to more pleasant and productive topics.

  • 21 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    No, you insisted on it. You're just the same as always aren't you ? Childish and have to have the last word. Oh and I'd compare my emails with yours ANY DAY. Thanks for trying to ruin something somebody else has worked so hard on. Oh go ahead, I know you'll have to have the last word...

    Cheryl

  • 21 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    I DO have the email where you insisted that I ban you publicly. Even YOU can't change that wording. YOU wanted a public fight, now we'll both probably be banned from Gardenweb for it.

  • 21 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    "I DO have the email where you insisted that I ban you publicly. Even YOU can't change that wording. "

    Huh?? Cheryl, now you're not even making sense. I've already agreed TWICE that I *did* insist on a public banning, and why. I haven't changed any wording anywhere.

    Cmon, let's get back to gardening.

  • 21 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    LOL, you don't want to get back to gardening Doc, you want this to go on and on...it's what you thrive on. You can't even let it rest yourself. You're the one who wanted this to go public, yet when I took it public you did all of this. You should be ashamed. So many people were looking forward to this swap. Nobody would have known you were banned, most people here now don't even know who you are because you've been gone so long, but you just had to start something. I will forever wonder why that is, but I agree, let's get back to gardening...it's SOOOO much more important to me than this thing with you. Like I have said often, I wish the best for you.

    Cheryl
    :o)

  • 21 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Whoa, Geez Louise guys!!!!!! Ya'll need to chill....or at least let's do this in a public place so I can sell tickets. ;-)

    Hey I even invited Plantbot the the Swap last year. Now that WOULD have been worth a $5 addmission!!!

    I reckon ya'll both got that out of your systems now so let's all kiss and make up. Xanex anyone?

  • 21 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Yes please Jeff ;o) lol

    Cheryl

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