Maybe this thread from the Kitchens forum has some clues?

I did something similar with a hutch, but not as dark. I painted cream latex paint, then mixed glaze and a darker brown paint. Then I drug a handmade tool I made from a window squeegee I cut small notches out of across it evenly. You get the striations you want. The glaze stays wet for a while so you can play with it. It's good to experiment first for a while to get the hang of it.

Let the first coat dry before you do the second!

I'd say you can get there by painting and glazing, or by painting and distressing, but honestly, my choice would be to pick another furniture refinisher. There are many people doing shabby chic furniture makeovers with chalk paint these days, and they'll have a better understanding of the look your friend is going for.

Thanks, all. It seems that the refinisher finally figured out how to do it, but I'm annoyed that he wasn't straight up with my friend regarding his lack of experience with this type of look in the first place. It would have saved a lot of time and angst.