Your granddaughter has an early diagnosis which will help to ensure she will reach her greatest potential. So many creative, productive and successful people are bipolar. In the arts you almost need to be in order to succeed :).

patty duke, dick caveat, Catherine Zeta Jones are a few people who have been vocal about their bipolar disorder. Every profession including scientists, politicians, doctors, musicians and more are filled with people treated for bipolar disorder.

i look at it similar to anemia. Just as a vitamin deficiency needs supplements to keep one healthy a person with bipolar disorder will need supplements to maintain their health too. Sometimes finding the best meds will be a trial and error which can be very frustrating but once a good match is found and with some behavior modification therapy happiness and stability will be achieved.

Yes, she can have a productive life. I have two family members with a mental illness (schizophrenia), and I highly recommend the info and family classes provided by NAMI (Natl Alliance on Mental Illness). I knew nothing about mental illness prior to my son's diagnosis at 21. NAMI was a lifesaver. The most important things are finding a good psychiatrist (meds) and psychologist or therapist (talk therapy). Those who take meds and participate in talk therapy have the best outcomes. It takes an average of 10 years to get an accurate diagnosis, so it is good that she has been diagnosed at a young age. The best thing you can do is get educated and be supportive. It is not an easy road, and my heart goes out to your granddaughter and to all of you. I applaud you for reaching out.

http://www.nami.org

Mental illness runs in my family. I've grown up with it, observed it and lived it. I think the best thing your granddaughter has going for her is the increased awareness and societal acceptance of this as an illness. The elderly members of my family didn't talk about it. My generation (middle-aged) sort of knew about it, but didn't understand it. My kids are aware and accepting of it, and this is the trend. So be hopeful for your granddaughter that she will, in her lifetime, have access to much more resources than ever before.

Unfortunately, those in my family who've had the best success in managing their illness are those who relied on the "old-school" pharmaceuticals that were prescribed 40 years ago. Based on my research and experience, today's medications are haphazardly prescribed, vary greatly in their effectiveness, and come with far too many side effects.

Based on your description here, I also question her diagnosis. Bipolar by definition includes mania. If she hasn't presented manic episodes, then perhaps her diagnosis is amiss.

But I understand that you as grandmother can't sweep in and start questioning the steps her parents and their health care provider have taken. Instead, consider this an illness, just like any physical diagnosis. It impacts her life, but doesn't define her. And it also doesn't limit her future by any means. As much as mental illness has been stigmatized, she can also function in all the regular settings that any adult does. And her awareness of her illness will likely make her more aware of her feelings, communication, and many other elements of her actions and personality that "normal" people don't pay attention to. Believe me, she has an advantage. :-)

Be super supportive and remind her it's not a failure to have a mental illness-it's like a thyroid disorder-things in your body just don't work right and you have to take medication to make them work.

Depression runs in my family and I'm just recovering from a severe depression and anxiety disorder. I realize I'll need to be on the medication for the rest of my life. My eldest DD also has depression and GAD and went off her meds because she felt better and hated the idea of having to take them, she thought she could just beat it. But a mental illness is not something you can over come by sheer will-just as you can't over come cancer by sheer will. You have to take the medications and you can live a wonderful, happy life. She's back on her meds and feels normal again-normal being able to function and not listen to that harmful self talk.

Depression is not what people who don't have it think it is-you don't have to be huddled in a corner with the blankets over your head, and a manic episode does not have to mean a hyper, super jacked up state.

My best advice is to let her know that you support her in anything she does, and you admire her strength and ambition and if it means taking medication to keep all those chemical misfires in her brain firing as they're supposed to, it's OK.

Best wishes to your family.

I have a family member who was diagnosed later in life -- that is difficult, but they still have a productive life. They just had to work through more ups and downs than you would want for someone, so it is a good thing that she has been diagnosed early. And this is early. Most diagnoses come in late teens through early adulthood. It is such a positive thing that this didn't surface after she was off at college. Just be grateful she is still living at home and has family support (and monitoring)

Second (or is this third) thing to know is that there is no one form of bipolar. It;s like saying all blondes or all redhead would look exactly alike. Some swing manic (which is not happy so much as agitated or feeling lack of consequences), some swing mostly into depression, some swing wildly both directions. The frequency of the cycling as well as possible triggers will vary also. When I found out about my family member, I bought a few books and read them as well as a lot of literature I found online. Unfortunately, I loaned the books and never got them back so I can't go check the titles of the couple I would suggest to start with. I think this was one of them.

Another thing to remember -- she is not alone in being bright. Bipolar syndrome is something that is more common in bright and talented people. There is a very long list of famous people who have been diagnosed as bipolar and many further back in history who are susected of haveing been bipolar.

Her cycles could change, but I would consider it a good thing that she doesn't go deep into mania. Mania can be very dangerous -- not only because a person may think they are superhuman or cannot grasp the consequences of their actions and do what we would think were crazy or at least plainly stupid things with lasting or even fatal consequences, but also because those poepl who experience positive effects of mania -- great creativity or productivity, or who just enjoy that high feeling, will typically resist taking meds that help reduce the swings because they reduce the highs.

Family support is essential. She will need someone she trusts to monitor her and let her know if things are changing, she appears to not be taking her meds, etc. Most folks also benefit from counseling to help explore, express and understand their feelings, their reactions and those of others around them so they can cope and learn how to manage it all.

So sorry this disease has touched your family. I have no direct experience, but do volunteer with AFSP (American Foundation for Suicide Prevention). They have a video which may be helpful for you on bipolar.

I have a grandson who was diagnosed with bp five years ago. He took all the meds and not one did anything for him. After two years of trying meds, he stopped taking them and a year later he had to have an exam for his new job. He mentioned he was bi polar. They sent him to a specialist who stated he's not bi polar at all. He's employed, leading a normal happy albeit stressful life. I would suggest a second or even third opinion.

Thanks for all the mostly positive information. It could be worse, is the message I got. And she certainly did get an early diagnosis. I think she has had some manic episodes but they weren't as high as her lows.

LisaD, depression runs in my family,too, and I've been on medication for nearly forty years. I'm so thankful that meds have worked for me for the most part. My mom had depression also but she was so ashamed of it. It was considered a character flaw at that time. She also didn't have the advantage of good medication.

Lascatz, thanks for the book suggestion. I usually go right to books for this sort of thing but I've been so rattled I hadn't even thought of it. My gd does have good family support. Both her mom and dad are excellent parents and they already had support from the therapist who works with the girls they adopted from foster care. I'm not sure if it was you or someone else who said it is good that it happened while she is still living at home. She has always had a good relationship with her parents which was why this came as such a shock to them. She started blaming them for everything going wrong in her life. Her mom said she always considered her wise for her age but she suddenly couldn't make the simplest decision. She was either sleeping or unable to sleep, and she would lash out at her parents. She has running thoughts that made her feel crazy. She has been in the hospital for a week and gets to come home today. She and her parents have had daily therapy sessions together and are being educated about the disease. I'm impressed with the level of care she is getting but she had only been treated by her family doctor until last week. It took three months to get an appt with a psychologist.

Annie, I watched the video you recommended. It was informative and part of it was by Kay Redfield Jamison. I remember reading her book several years ago about her own battle with mental illness.

Kswl, the move and the adoption certainly seem like they could contribute to this but she has insisted all along that the adoption was a good thing. She was an only child for fifteen years and is so happy to have siblings. And the move doesn't take them out of her school district. She is a sophomore and very active in debate. That gives her a built in circle of friends although they are very intellectual and geeky. It is really a good outlet for her but she has had to cut her participation way down. They are moving to a beautiful big house suited to a family of six. None of the kids will have to change schools.

Thanks to all of you I'm feeling more hopeful about her future. I'm hoping she is one of those who will follow doctors orders and take her medication.

Well some of what you describe, especially blaming her parents for everything and sleeping a lot or not sleeping, could be totally normal teen behavior. Even the best relationships are tested at her age -- it's part of their preparing for independence.

BUT, it does sound like there was more than a normal amount of stuff going on and it's good that was recognized. The inability to sleep and running thoughts sound like they could be her level of manic behavior -- and runaway thoughts could easily prevent focus and the ability to make decisions -- as well as the fact that she doesn't feel right and doesn't understand what is going on. I do think blaming her parents is a natural outlet for her feeling out of control. They just need to understand that and work through it with her.

I do send all my best wishes your way. They are going to need a lot of patience, persistence and perseverence. I did say something about it being good they caught this before she went off to college where they couldn't see it or be there to help her -- but there is also that 18th birthday. If they don't want your help, you can't do anything and you can't even have a meaningful discussion with her doctors, professors, etc.

My oldest (almost 26yo) son is bp. He was diagnosed at 16 and had been having issues for about a year prior to that. He began having severe bouts of depression and aggressive outbursts. (His manic episodes were aggressive) He had always been a very sweet, dreamy, intellectual and sensitive child, so these behaviors were totally out of character for him. Since mental illness runs in my family I immediately accepted his diagnosis and threw myself into the task of helping him have the best chance for a productive life. Dh had a very hard time with all of it but slowly learned to accept it (NAMI helped) and is very supportive. It was a long, hard road to find the right psychiatrist, meds and therapist. He was hospitalized twice before he turned 18 and spent 3 months in a private out of state mental health facility. He did manage to go away to college but was not taking his meds, so ended up hospitalized back here when he was 21. Since then he has been very stable on meds, graduated college and is now in grad school. He manages very well (for him), but I believe he will always struggle on some level. His illness has at times been devastating, and even when he is doing well I am always worried. Early on it nearly ruined my marriage and family, but we got through it. My two brothers each have a son with bp and my sister lost her 29yo son to mental Illness two years ago. The best advise I can give you is to be supportive, loving and become as educated as possible. There is still a stigma about mental illness and many people really do not understand or want to. I wish you and your family all the best.

Like any chronic illness, bipolar illness cannot be cured, but it can be MANAGED with diet, exercise, medication, and therapy. Education and acceptance are key for your granddaughter and everyone around her. Sometimes someone with a chronic illness doesn't realize when they're getting worse--speaking as someone with many diabetics in the family. Diet and exercise get short shrift sometimes but they are very important. Also, your granddaughter's family needs to be proactive and to work with her to come up with care plans (doctors, facilities, and, when she's older, power of attorney etc.) for times of acute medical crisis when she is unable to care for herself.

Melis...thank you for sharing so much. so helpful.

You are such a great grandma! I was wondering though if your granddaughter was given an extensive full physical at any time during the bipolar diagnosis? I have read (not sure if it's true) that up to 1 of 20 people are misdiagnosed. For some with other diseases severe depression and anxiety are a side effect.

I would like to add to the comments suggesting a second opinion. My DH was prescribed an anti-depressant for chronic migraines years ago. The medication caused insomnia. As that continued, he became irritable and easily distracted. He was diagnosed as bipolar and we started on a 5year nightmare of piling on more and more medicines. Finally we went to the Cleveland Clinic where they administered an MMPI and did an extensive work up, and did a sleep study and then told us he was not bipolar. Eleven years later he is still dealing with the effects of being so heavily medicated for so long. This is a very abbreviated version of the story, but believe me when I say it is a miracle he lived through it all.

All this is not to say diagnosis might not be accurate, but I do think a second opinion is a wise choice.

I would be extremely leery of a bipolar diagnosis of a 16 year old. Her parents are making some extreme life choices (like adopting three kids at once). Your granddaughter doesn't get a say-so in her parents' decisions to expand the family, or to be uprooted from her friends and activities. Maybe your she is just reacting (understandably) negatively to these changes. Squeaky wheels get the grease, whether or not they are really the problem. And while the fields of psychiatry and psychology may contain some genuinely helpful practitioners, it is also a field littered with a lot of quacks, and appallingly lacking in any accountability for misdiagnoses and mistreatments.

Nobody knows what the future holds.

An in-law I'm close to is bipolar. I met her when we were both 18, a couple of years before she was diagnosed with BPD. I've read a lot on bipolar along with witnessing it first hand with her.

"Mary" was never the depressive type, but did have manic episodes which consisted of rage, hyperness when in a good mood, spending money, and talked fast during her mania phase. She wasn't always aggressive though.

Running thoughts, lashing out, and blaming parents is part of mania. She did the exact same thing to her parents!

At the time it wasn't funny, but looking back it is now. Her mom told me the very first time she knew something was wrong with Mary was when Mary called her and asked if her uncle was really her father. LOL Things just got worse from there a little bit at a time.

It took experimenting with several meds before Mary found the right one to help her. Absolutely NO antidepressants though, they can cause mania in bipolars. She's doing wonderful! Worked in the legal field with the Fed's all her life, smart as a whip.

Once in a while she will have a slight manic episode that lasts maybe a day tops. Bad mood, or a happy hyper. Nothing to write home about.

The hardest part of bipolar is the beginning, obviously. Especially for family members.

I am pro-medicine though. Some do have bad side effects but it's trial and error until the right dosage is figured out. In fact, she cut back her dosage the doctor prescribed on her own and it made her feel a lot better. I'm glad I hung in there with her, she's like a sister to me now.

I know you must be worried sick about your family. I agree with getting a second opinion and would also like to suggest that hormones might be a factor. PMDD can cause some of the symptoms you describe. Cyber hugs to you.

PMDD in teens

For a child, even a teen, to "insist" she wants something that she KNOWS her parents want is very understandable, even if it isn't quite true. It may also be true that your GD really does, consciously, want siblings but is still reacting to not being the only child any longer. As to the house---the big, beautiful new house----how might you feel if the small, unbeautiful house was good enough for you, but once the new children were adopted a larger house was bought for them? Obviously I don't know your GD or anything of the situation and personalities other than what you have shared here, but I do know kids and teens. Does everyone think the life changes are simply coincidence or triggers for a condition that was unthinkable for this girl before? A second opinion will at least help them sort it out. I would be prepared for some argument or disbelief from her parents. They may not want to believe this is acting out in response to their decisions because they were convinced their daughter was happy about the changes.

if the diagnosis is correct, one of the hardest things about managing BP is medication compliance... it can manifest itself very differently in different people.

many people with bipolar actually quite enjoy the manic aspect of their disease- they might feel creative, or witty, or able to conquer the world, etc etc... often they don't like it when the meds even out that aspect of themselves- they would sometimes rather suffer the sometimes more self destructive aspects of their manic phases or the depression than 'lose' that side of themselves... finding the proper medication and dosing for the individual is impt!

Kswl, parents know what it's like to have a teen act out over something major in their life, but when you are with someone who has an episode, you will know the difference. I'm not saying the girl is bipolar, but it begins just out of the blue with disturbing behavior, enough to take someone to a doctor/hospital.

Busybee, so true! And it's that happy mania which gets them into trouble in all sorts of way. Before "Mary" was diagnosed, she had a two foot high stack of slacks and jeans still with the price tag on them, and never worn. She was very happy doing all of that shopping. lol.

I have cared for may "bipolar" patients. IMHO this is an extremely popular diagnosis in no doubt driven by pharmaceutical companies who supply the medication. My humble observations are that many people with anxiety issues, behavior issues and adjustment issues are diagnosed bipolar and medicated without apparent relief of their symptoms. I know my opinion will not be popular but so many times I have seen a patient with difficulties spend a short time with a psychiatrist who diagnoses them as bipolar, prescribes medication, sends them to a psychologist then sees them once a month for a 15 minute appointment. When the patient does not improve the treatment then becomes adjusting medication doses or switching medications. That can go on for years when many times (IMHO) the diagnosis was incorrect to begin with.

You would be surprised how many people who were not truly bipolar became cured of that diagnosis once they were taught coping skills, and added exercise to their lives.

My son's own psychiatrist has said that that a bipolar diagnosis can be difficult to pinpoint precisely and is often mis-diagnosed, especially in adolescents. Some of the symptoms overlap with many other conditions, and the Dr has to factor in how reliable the patient and family is at accurately reporting issues/symptoms. Getting the meds right without over-medicating is also difficult and not always done well by all doctors. My dh was anti- medication 10 years ago when our own saga with this began, but now understands that for someone suffering with true bipolar, the medications are life saving. Diet, exercise and supplements can help, but they do not replace medication.

Acadiafun, I agree....I have a woman friend who has a bipolar diagnosis and I happen to know that her psychiatrist diagnoses the vast majority of patients similarly. Does she have it? Maybe....but what are the odds that 80% of her fellow patients would also have it?

Melis, I also agree that those who have bipolar disorder are best served by a treatment regimen that includes the right medication. We have a family member with obsessive compulsive disorder and it is interesting how many people still believe people can "snap out of it" at will, or whose symptoms can be managed solely with diet and lifestyle changes.

Some of you make some good points. I don't know how many of them are true. Time will tell. Her mom says a week in the hospital has given her a whole new outlook on life. She realizes she has a wonderful family after comparing them to the families of the teenagers she met in the hospital. She asked her parents if they would take one pregnant fifteen year old in as a foster child. She has a kind heart but I think her parents may be maxed out for awhile. LOL

She was diagnosed with bipolar 2 which means her highs aren't that high but her lows are lower than plain depression. She is taking lithium

Peaceofmind, my work involves diagnosing children and adolescents and I can add my voice to the list of others who have pointed out that bipolar disorder is one of the most over-diagnosed conditions among youth. A specialist (psychiatrist) in our area who is locally known as an "overdiagnoser" of bipolar in kids and teens said himself at a research conference that I attended that he believes fewer than half of the diagnoses of bipolar in teens and children are correct. I've seen it applied to kids who would more accurately be diagnosed with social phobia, seasonal affective disorder, plain depression, drug abuse, video game addiction, anxiety disorder, run of the mill teen angst, and even autism spectrum disorders. There are even large variations by state/region in the numbers of kids diagnosed with bipolar, indicating that other factors than its actual occurrence in a population are at play.

Which is only to say that her prognosis may be better over the long term than if she were going to struggle with true bipolar disorder all her life. It is good she is getting treatment. The report she has given of her time in the hospital and her feelings about her own family after being there is a very common one.

Regarding her feelings about the new family members: many people experience post-partum depression even when the baby they just had is very much wanted. Likewise, post-adoption depression is a real thing and it happens to more adoptive parents than you might expect--even when the adoption is much desired . The addition of a sibling group is inherently a major reorganization of the family and stressful, no matter how wonderful the new arrivals are. I hope your granddaughter can get support for the fact that it's a major adjustment and feels okay about having mixed feelings if she does. It's common for kids to feel both affection for newly adopted siblings and homesick for the routines and roles that existed before they arrived. It can help them to know that their parents accept both feelings and are likely having both kinds of feelings themselves.

Best of wishes to your GD and the whole family. I hope it will get much better soon.