Re face the cabinets.

Another option is painting over the cabinets.

I think the oak is fine,too. In addition to Sophies advice, look at updating your hardware, your boob lights, and window treatment.

A really good cleaning with Orange Glo does wonders in addition to Sophie Wheeler's comments. Don't clutter and keep fresh flowers on hand.

We are not sure we want to re face. I was hoping to either stain or paint but I don't know my options with oak or if one or the other is better. I feel like dark stain may look more 80s than modern? Is there a specific color that is popular right now?

I would recommend leaving the cabinets and updating the countertop, backpslash, and the paint on the walls. Maybe you could pull the refrigerator cabinet out to be flush with the pantry and update the lighting. Remove the light over the valance and add lighting to the valance, install can lighting in the kitchen and some pendant lighting over the peninsula.

Your cabs are just fine, but you're dealing with a lot of dark colors that eat light. Your room is monochrome, including the woods.

Choose a jazzy accent color. Celery green? Red-orange? Turquoise? Mustard yellow? If you have foot and leg problems from standing, get a pro-quality set of Gel Mats in the jazzy color. A painted horizontal stripe or stencil on the wall above the cabs will also give new life to the wall. Glad to see you have a heat-repelling/holding, insulating curtain over the sink, but it's almost too good a match with the rest of the room. If you can afford to, replace that honeycomb shade with a sensible heat-repelling/holding shade or curtain in the accent color. If possible, remove the valence over the sink and put in a fabric valence in a print that uses your sassy color(s)...or at least re-shape the wood valence it so it's rectangular, which would look more timeless. If you do a valence, put one over the patio door to match it and consider curtaining that door as well. Keep the floor color light.

I'm assuming that you have stone countertops which are too spendy to replace, but if that's laminate, you have a world of affordable choices for replacement.

Look into new cabinet hardware styles...choose something that is either more sparkly or more high-contrast with the wood or get handles in that special sassy color.

Whenever you add potted plants, accent items, counter-sitting items, be careful to choose something that compliments the larger unity of the room colors instead of repeating the monoculture. If you choose a new light fixture, get one that has some serendipity to it. If you had white instead of stainless steel appliances, you'd cut down the blahness of the room. As it is, I suggest refraining from buying stainless-looking counter-sitting items such as mixer or toaster or canisters.

Continue your accent color(s) in the adjacent spaces. Placemats, tablecloths, serving bowls, centerpieces for the kitchen table by the patio door, plus more items in other parts of the house.

You need some internal light sources. If you're fancy-averse, you won't want to add flashy items like posh silvery metal, but consider hand-thrown pottery with some metalic glazes or pewter pieces or shiny plastics that don't look cheap. Add some under-counter lights so each corner is a better workspace--plus the light will bounce off the countertop.

I would update the countertops, possibly use a stain/poly all in one and go with something a little darker. Then update the handles/pulls and loose the piece at the window.

Thank you all! I love the color ideas along with the backsplash, lighting (YES to the pendant lights, love those!) and removal of the scalloped wood piece. The "boob lights" need to go and don't provide much light. I hadn't thought of curtains on the patio window due to the small space, but it makes sense if I use a lighter fabric. Our counter tops are a fake looking granite overlay. Does anyone have a specific color of darker stain they would reccomend that wouldn't look too 80s?