I'd sent Mark a message that part was in for my car and so could he please come by and take off the old one so as to save me $200. He called me at lunch time to ask if I could bring him a key and he'd get it done. I was excited to think that the car would finally be fixed, but not anxious. I still have the truck and the car needs more than just a bit of computer done; it also needs new exhaust. I have the exhaust fix in the budget in two more weeks. And the hardtop will be on it, with a new soft top in March. So the car will be out of the way. Only... the new computer didn't fix it. Uh oh. I hope the car isn't dead. However, Mark was pretty groggy and he'd done a Patriot Guard escort for a soldier brought home through Smyrna yesterday, and gotten up at 4:30AM. Probably just fuzzy. He'll get it done later. Mark and I didn't really play together much as kids and at school he picked at me. Me, being the sensitive fool I was, took it personally. We're only just now connecting. He's really a shy guy and doesn't really say what he's feeling, but lately, when he's come over to "work on the house" (usually electricity), he'll just happen to stay until dinner is served. Then, he'll sit around on the couch hanging out with LF and me, watching tv, talking to us, and/or playing board games. I think he's really just coming over for company. Twice now, he doesn't even do any work. It just makes me smile. So we ate meatloaf and dirty rice while watching MythBusters and playing Battleship last night. And the car will wait until his next day off.

I really loved walking into the house when I brought him the key at lunch and seeing my ceiling all in one piece. Mark even complimented me on it! Mark, the picker, complimenting??? It was like I had come home. Rather than into the house. It's like it has changed now. I feel comforted by being there. My refuge. It's been a long time coming and really, I think that is an integral part of my life that has been missing. I need someplace away from it all and haven't had it, since being there is being someplace else that needs something from me. I came in, threw down my keys on the bar that I'd made Saturday (shoot that alone is wonderful! somewhere to put things, properly!!!), patted the cats, ate a bite, changed my shoes, and looked at the kitchen. It made me happy to be home. The loan officer has my 34 page application, my appraiser check, my last paystub, and two W2s. I wait on the appraiser to call me to set up the appointment. I assume they'll come next week. I have to finish working on the house by Saturday night as Sunday is LF's birthday party. And, this time, I'm ready. It's nice to be ready.

I don't know if you've ever seen it, but The Secret was a video our counselor told us to get in marriage counseling this time last year. I followed its advice. It basically says, envision it and it will happen. I've been taking it two steps farther. I write down my goals and post them on my desk. I've accomplished so many of them, I have to make new lists. It's so awesome to set what seem to be unreachable goals, but then have to take down the list because all of the goals have been attained!!! I started out with 5 goals, really hard goals, the hardest obstacles I had at the time. They're pretty much done. Then I made of list of 10 more things, the next time I added in fun stuff, that is, not just housekeeping, and attained those. I took down the list two weeks ago, but hadn't made a new one. This time, I wanted to shoot for the stars and not think too small. They're giant, things I can't see any way to possibly happen. I am however, excited to know they will come true, and I'll have the moon and stars in my pocket.