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Evan's Garden

19 years ago

I've sat down half a dozen times or more to write this post concerning my son's memorial garden, only to get up and walk away. It's been a tough few months. Now that spring is considering making an appearance, I think I'm ready to begin planning.

The spot I have in mind is part sun and moist. I had thought of using only plants that Evan liked, but now I'm thinking of planting things he would have liked, and things my younger son will like. I want it to be enjoyed. So...I'm thinking of a native hydrangea border. I think kids will like the big floppy flowers. I purchased a Hydrangea quercifolia "Sikes Dwarf" and a mystery hydrangea that looks like another Oakleaf. I would also like to get H. arborescens "Annabelle." Do you have some suggestions of other fun, flowering perennial, and some evergreens (maybe ferns) that kids would like?

I hope to put in a path next to the flowering border, and on the other side have a raised bed for the Japanese maples that have been given to us in Evan's memory. And then on the other side of that will be a little playground (the playground space will be roughly 15' X 15'). We're putting in a raised area for a playset and some Adirondak chairs. I'm excited to be using a space that we haven't known what to with. I hope for it to be a place of enjoyment for the whole family.

Thanks for your suggestions (as well as all of your thoughtful emails and prayers.)

Pam

Comments (18)

  • 19 years ago

    Pam, how exciting to hear your plans!

    Plants that might be fun include the native ginger, an evergreen plant with hidden flowers that ants pollinate. I love to show them to kids. The common name is "little brown jug" because the flower looks just like that. An interesting fern is the cinnamon fern - it can get quite big (looks like a prehistoric fern) but the interesting part is the fertile frond that arises in the middle and from which the common name originates - it looks like a cinnamon stick.

    Other fun plants are those which attract butterflies to lay their eggs on them: butterfly weed, parsley, fennel, dill to name a few. Kids delight in watching the caterpillars chomp away on them. Plus it's fun to chomp on a piece of parsley yourself straight from the garden. Plant nectar rich plants nearby in a sunnier spot to attract the butterflies to the area.

    Of course sprinkling the area with fun garden art always draws the kids in. Concrete frogs and bunnies, those butterflies on wobbly sticks, a large flat rock for sittin' on ....

    I love native hydrangeas and have reproduced some from cuttings. I would love to share some of these with you, including an 'Annabelle' (a vigorous plant, you'll have a sizable one in no time). I have also have some oakleaf ones.

    I have many native ferns and gingers that I've rescued ... just waiting for a new home. Evan's garden sounds like a great spot ... let me know if you could use them. In addition to the evergreen ferns like Christmas and Ebony spleenwort, I have the delicate but tough maidenhair fern and the more sun-happy southern shield fern (thelypteris kunthii). I also have a pot of daffodils that I've been saving for you (remembering that he liked yellow).

    Sounds like a great project to sink your shovel into.

  • 19 years ago

    Pam, you have been to my garden. if there is anything you would like for Evans garden just let me know.

  • 19 years ago

    Pam, if there is a slightly sunnier spot, even a few hours of direct sun per day, lambs ears would be lovely. I'm sure I have some I could offer to you. Children just love the wooly lambs ears!

    GGG

  • 19 years ago

    Children might enjoy cyclamen. There is no sight of it in the summer, but in the fall when everything else is slowing down, the tiny little cyclamen stems pop up, followed by blooms through the fall and winter. For some reason, it always reminds me of fairies. Cyclamen would do well planted among hydrangeas - they like the same general conditions.
    How about iris cristata? I thought of it because I have it planted among my hydrangeas. They are quite short (maybe 6 inches) and bloom in late spring with gorgeous blue blossoms with yellow centers. Over the years they become a slow-growing ground cover. I can dig some starters for you if you want some. I have plenty and would love to contribute to Evan's garden.

  • 19 years ago

    Thanks everyone for your suggestions and offers. I'm getting excited about getting this project going. Although, I have to measure and prepare the space first. Now that the weather (hopefully) will be warming up, I can get out there and work.

    GGG, I think we will do a sunnier Evan's garden at a later date. A neighbor gave us a beautiful birdhouse that I thought would be pretty in a songbird garden.
    Pam

  • 19 years ago

    I measured the spot where I would like the flowering border, and it's approximately 18 feet long (longer if I turn the curve), and several feet deep. I have an Itea "Saturnalia" and Clethra alnifolia "Ruby Spice" there already.

    Any summer blooming ideas? And it doesn't have to be all native plants. Mostly just fun stuff that will be ok in morning sun. I don't want anything too aggressive.

    Thanks,
    Pam

  • 19 years ago

    Well, nothing says summer like annuals! You know with enough fertilizer they will bloom their hearts out and the nice thing is that you can choose a different set of annuals the next year. Impatiens are a good choice for morning sun. For a perennial, how about iris?

  • 19 years ago

    I've been writing down a kind of design for the garden. How do these plants sound:

    For kid's interest:
    2 Hydrangea quercifolia "Sike's Dwarf" (I already have these)
    3 Hydrangea arborescens "Annabelle"
    2 Cinnamon Ferns (I already have these)
    2 Lizard's Tails
    1 Spider Lily
    2-4 Christmas ferns
    2 Cyclamen

    What I already have that needs a home:
    hostas
    astilbe (with white flowers)
    Camellia
    Calla lily (white flowers)

    Other stuff:
    Daffodils
    spring ephemerals (wood poppy, Virginia bluebells, etc.)

    What do you think?
    Thanks for your help with this. I'm kind of at a loss when it comes to design.
    Pam

  • 19 years ago

    Evans garden sounds wonderful. You have a nice list of plants.
    Not sure if you want to deal with Annuals but snapdragons are great fun for kids. They do fine with morning sun or full sun.
    Cath

  • 19 years ago

    I have a special needs son. He helps me plan what to plant and LOVES going through seed catalogs. I steer him towards the sensory plants. Thus, in his garden the plants have to feel good (Lamb's ear), smell good (rosemary, dianthus) or be easy to pick for the vase(zinnias, rudbeckias, sunflower.) Outside of that, we will experiment together with the "weird stuff" in the seed catalog.

    The greatest blessing in having a garden geared towards our children is there does not have to be rules. Just a lot of "neat stuff." Aside from that my son says there needs to be worms. Those you can throw on your sister.

    Enjoy and God Bless.

  • 19 years ago

    Have you thought about creating a special stepping stone with some bits of his favorite toys or something in it? What about "forget me nots?" They would be beautiful around the daffodils. Sugarhill gave some to my daughter when we were there in the summer of 2005, so she was only 4 at the time and they are by far her favorite flower and if she had her way we would fill the yard with them, plus off course the name is perfect for a memorial garden. I would be happy to give you some. Will you be attending the Spring trade?

  • 19 years ago

    I do plan to attend the trade, Kathy, and I would love some Forget Me Nots. A great suggestion for a memorial garden.

    I love the sensory garden ideas, mcrean1. My son, Duncan, is only 9 months old, but he already loves digging in the dirt. I think he would really enjoy touching and smelling plants and flowers in his own garden.

    I saw a neat idea on GW about finding cultivars that have the same name as the deceased loved one. I've already found a couple of things with the name Evan. I'll be looking for some Duncans, too.

    Now if the weather would be more agreeable on the weekends, we could get a good start.

    Thanks everyone for your suggestions.
    Pam

  • 19 years ago

    I meant to post some pictures a while back. The garden is looking good, despite the drought. Unfortunately, some deer have been munching on my hostas. I may replace them with something a bit more deer resistant.

    I wanted to include a link to my blog, where I have garden pics, as well as thoughts and memories of a much missed son, and his surviving brother.
    Pam

    http://www.evansgarden.blogspot.com/

  • 19 years ago

    Pam, your blog is very touching.

    GGG

  • 19 years ago

    I'm really enjoying looking at your blog as well, Pam. Thanks so much for sharing it with us. I have bookmarked it!

    Debbie

  • 19 years ago

    Thanks for Sharing your blog Pam. I often think of you and wonder how your doing.

    Cath

  • 19 years ago

    Pam,
    when I see yellow flowers in my garden, I think of you and Evan.
    Thank you for sharing your blog with us.
    ~Natalie

  • 19 years ago

    Pam, I don't know what to say other than you are a wonderful brave soul. I have two children as well, an 11 year old girl and a spirited :) 3 year old boy. As a mother, I can not imagine your terrible loss. Best of luck to you and your family, you are truly an inspiration.

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