I would try looking at any online nursery and use their search tool. Bluestone has a pretty good one.

The page below is the best I've found for my purposes so far for woody plants. The detailed entries include a "liabilities" section and a warning if a plant is known to be invasive in Connecticut (they're using the definition "naturalize in minimally managed areas", not aggressive in the garden). I've used this search page and have specified the soil and light conditions among other criteria.

Here is a link that might be useful: UConn Plant DB Search page

I buy quite a bit from Forest Farm out West and also try to get to Rare Find Nursery in Jackson as often as I can. Both maintain extensive catalogs on line, but I do not recall either being specific about eventual mature size of plants.
Have used the UConn Plant pages and appreciate them but I really like pictures.

bogturtle,

The UConn DB does have pictures, for most but not all of its entries. They're very small on the left-side frame that has the text but if you click on one, it'll fill the right-side frame. If you want to experiment you can look at the entry for Liriodendron tulipifera (tuliptree), which has about 20 pictures.

Unlike the catalogues though, occasionally the pictures make the plants look less attractive than they really are. I think the summer foliage of Lindera benzoin (spicebush) looks much more attractive than the picture would indicate. Have fun.