Perhaps some are put off by the toxicity of the plant? I have no small children, and a new (though small) greenhouse, so can certainly provide a good home for your mother's oleander. I don't have asparagus fern, but perhaps can find something else to trade when she has more time and energy for plants ... I have lots of perennials & bulbs and some houseplants.

However ... you are a good 1.5-2 hour drive away (I'm along the shore in Monmouth County) ... so if someone else is really seriously interested, I'll defer to her/him.

I'll check in to see how you're doing, but don't despair - one way or another, your oleander will have a good home.

Diane