A Worms' Tale

21 years ago

My Life, A Worms Tale

Reddy WigglerÂs Expose on life as a Composting Worm

PREFACE

IÂm Reddy Wiggler, an EF in the bins of a member of this forum. IÂve been actively involved with his operation all my life, and the boss has utilized my abilities in many different aspects of the endeavor. I was instrumental in the implementation of the advertising department of the operation and became the spokesworm of it.

Recently, I decided to write an account, autobiographically, of life in the bin from a wormsÂ perspective. These serialized excerpts of the book are being presented here at the suggestion of my man, Chuckiebtoo. A forthcoming segment of the TV documentary series Modern Marvels is in production, and should be available during the sweeps period later in the fall.

I hope you enjoy this and subsequent segments of my story.

The Beginning

I was hatched in the back of a USPS mail shipping envelope on a flight from Chicago to Dallas in the winter. Every worm in that envelope was scared stiff since it was all new territory to them. Me and the other hatchlings on the flight were completely comfortable with our surroundings since we knew nothing else. Later, I found out that Chuckiebtoo was more than a little concerned about the cold temps on the flight, but the whole pound of us arrived safely, as I knew we would, with the exception of a few invalid, over the hill worms who just crawled over into a little squirm and gave up...drained of a worms' will.

Upon arrival, things got better for us real quick. My man had a new home already prepared for us with all kinds of extravagances waiting. We were introduced to fresh bedding, a buffet to die for, lots of nice damp surroundings, and peace and quiet.

The old timers in the bin knew we had attained the ultimate degree of wormdom. Just produce, they said, and all your day-to-day problems are over. Fish hook threats were a thing of the past.

We had happened upon the perfect social welfare system. All that was expected of us would be to eat (a delight), produce worm castings (not a problem), and reproduce (a pleasure). Heaven was an 18 gallon plastic Sterilite container, and we were HOME.

Next: the first little rumblings in the bin

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Comments (9)

anong28
21 years ago
Looking forward to the next instalment of Reddy Wiggler's story. Having read your postings before, I'm sure we are going to be highly entertained by Reddy Wriggler.
sqh1
21 years ago
I have a feeling I should get a headstart on Happy Hour before reading the next chapter...:)
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vicky4x4
21 years ago
I wonder if Reddy Wriggler will think he has it made when he gets to the part of the story where "his man" leaves him and a host of his friends in the back of his car to fry. Chuckie you never really did tell us why you had those bins in the car in the first place...............
Love the story, have fun with this one, we all need a laugh after the goings on in the gulf. I hope you and your worms where spared any wind and rain damage.

Vicky
Kelly_Slocum
21 years ago
Do you suppose Reddy is going to say anything about the proposed worm demolition project? Good lord! do you think he/she KNEW?!?

Hang on SQH1, I'll join you at the bar!

Kelly S
wormfarmer_6
21 years ago
Eagerly awaiting the next chapter with "baited" breath. LOL
carnationman
21 years ago
O dear , heat treatement,space invaders, and quite possibly a bomb scare can't wait regards John
chuckiebtoo
Original Author
21 years ago
Vicky4X4:

Like an anxious parent, I'm monitoring the reviews, if you will, of Reddy's book. I noticed your question about the bins in the van and felt compelled to explain.

I took those bins to my daughters' nursery in Round Rock as I do once a month. I market worms, and castings, and tea there. Anyway, I left the worms in the van overnight after carefully monitoring the temps outside and inside the van. Thinking the worms would be "out of harm's way", (I love that phrase now that I've heard it about 50 thousand times during hurricane coverage used primarily as an excuse for various screw-ups), I forgot about them until I opened the van's door the next morning when my sense of smell brought my memory back.

Now you know the awful secret I'll carry with me to my ultimate worm bin.

Chuckiebtoo
vstech
20 years ago
Rededy, sorry, Reddy, are you up to the part in the story where the "man on the street" perspective is needed? are you taking interviews? any input needed or expert witnesses? do you need any "protection" have the reporters started hounding your quarters for interviews? how about your publisher? is the schedule to your liking? have you gotten your first payment for the rights to this book? I do hope writers cramp is not a problem for you.
John
vstech
20 years ago
what kind of keyboard are you using to put out this wonderfull book? I understand typing can be difficult for an invertabrate. do you have one of the new ailen thought transcribers, (I couldn't afford the exam for the fitting of the one I had my hearts set on) I understand they make putting your ideas down much simpler, but the layaway plan is all I could afford.
John