sorry should give more info..we're planning a dance..hopefully getting buisnesses around her town to donate..hall, booze, food etc.

How about a silent auction of some really nice prizes? and if you get enough prize donations, you can have an auction during the dance. One of the pubs here does that for the Santa Claus fund every year and raises thousands.
If it is a small town, where everyone knows everyone else well, you could have a vote for ( every vote costs $1) the best garden, the best teacher, the best butt, the nicest hair. etc.
In stead of having it catered, why not have a box social, where all the women bring a really nice picnic for two, the boxes they bring them in are decorated, and all the gentlemen bid on the boxes. The highest bid wins. In the old days, the gentleman was to eat the lunch with the lady who made it, but you could decide the buyer eats supper with his own lady.

My cousins lost their house to fire, so I know your friends loss. Good luck and God Speed.