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jennclark5

Going barefoot at a friend's house???

25 years ago

I'm 16 years old and live in a part of the country that is usually really warm most of the year. As a result, I've always liked going barefoot whenever possible. My question is, after school, if I go over to a friend's house, is it okay to take my tennis shoes and socks off? How can I do this, or ask her mother about this without seeming rude? It's funny, most people don't mind if you just kick your sandals or flats off, but if it's shoes AND socks, I've heard some people get offended. What can I do?

Comments (62)

  • 25 years ago

    I think this is a fascinating subject, and am surprised there haven't been more replies. I agree with you completely about bare feet, though not normally in the street. Does anyone else think that going barefoot where it is safe is fun?

  • 25 years ago

    Yes it is fun.

  • 25 years ago

    If you came to my house, you would be more than welcome to walk barefoot.

    I enjoy going barefoot a lot, and hardly ever wear shoes in the house. When the weather is warm, I will go barefoot inside and outside.

    Going barefoot is good for your feet, it toughens the soles, strengthens the ankles, and helps avoid such maladies as athlete's foot, bunions, nail fungus, and many other things.

  • 25 years ago

    Yeah, i love going barefoot!!! Especially at home! when i get home, i usually take my shoes off at the door, and after a few minutes, i take my socks off. Its usually warm where i live, so its the most comfortable way to be most of the year.
    As far as friends houses go, its usually not a problem, but i dont alwasy take my shoes off. Last week, i was at my friends house for a birthday party, and we were just chilling, and he was just like "you could take your shoes off man" and i didnt at first, but after a while i did.
    Another thing i noticed is when i was a barbecue last week,and people were at that house for the whole day. Then, later on, most people came in the house. It seemed like the number of people wearing shoes decreased steadily until almost everybody wasnt wearing shoes. Some people were barefoot because they were wearing sandals and they took them off. A few girls were wearing socks for a while, but the ended up taking them off. I had my shoes off, but i didnt take the socks off.
    It seems more likely to me that girls will go barefoot more often. This is probably because they usually wear like sandals and open shoes without socks , so when tehy take them off, they're barefoot.
    Also, i noticed, that once a couple people start taking their shoes off, it seems like most people end up taking them off. But its cool with me, I like having my shoes and socks off.

  • 25 years ago

    I agree completely with the last three people. I think it is a shame that more people don't realise the benefits of going barefoot. I think that a lot of children like to have the freedom of no shoes and socks, which is encouraging as it will mean they have healthy feet. However, I don't suggest going everywhere barefoot as some would. I would only take my shoes and socks off where it is safe eg. at home.
    To return to the original question, I would be interested to know whether Jen did have bare feet when she visited her friend's house.

  • 25 years ago

    Wow! Thats awesome that she just told you to!! I assume that you did take them off, right?
    How exactly did she say that? Was it just a suggestion?
    Was she barefoot also? What about your friend? Does she usually go barefoot at her house?
    So was this the first time you ever went barefoot at your friend house? or have you asked other times?
    Please reply. It seems like a lot of people are interested in this. hehe

  • 25 years ago

    Thank you, Jenn. I am sure that you were much more comfortable in your bare feet.
    It's also good that your question has generated so mush interest. Keep posting, people!!

  • 25 years ago

    A few times when i was over someones house, they asked me to take my shoes off. However , no one ever asked me to go barefoot. I like getting to take my shoes off and going barefoot, but i wouldnt want to be "forced" to go barefoot. Were you kinda forced to go barefoot? or did you have a choice?

  • 25 years ago

    Jenn, I'm impressed that you care enough to ask. Who says our teenagers don't care anymore. Kudos to you!

  • 25 years ago

    Jenn, funny as it may be, it has happened to me before. I took a trip down to VA to visit my friend from college at home. It was during a painfully hot week in July, so I figured if I ask her parents, they'd prolly let me go barefoot (yes, I love it, too). After I got there and unloaded all of my stuff, her mom told me that I may as well just take my shoes and socks off unless I want to suffer in the heat. Beat me to the question for sure. Nice surprise, though, after the horrid drive.

  • 25 years ago

    I really want to be able to go barefoot at the local holiday programme that I visit in the school holidays. The problem is with my sisters. When I was around the age of 8, I used to tease my sisters because they went barefoot so much, afraid to admit that I myself enjoyed going barefoot. But now that I am a 13 year old and I really want to go barefoot, they've grown out of it and wear shoes. And so now I'm on the recieving end. I have a lot of friends at the holiday programme who would like to go barefoot with me, but because I teased my sisters so much when I was younger, I can't do that now. My sisters go to the holiday programme as well.

  • 25 years ago

    I hate to go barefoot but at my best friends house everyone loves it. One day last winter I went to my friends house for the day. I was wearing jeans, a sweatshirt, trainers and socks.
    As I went in through the door I was told to takemy shoes and socks off. I felt weird butI did it anyway. Later on it started to snow so weopened the backdoor and took a look. My mates brother pushed us outside and shut the door and left us standing outside in the snow for 20 minutes. I have never gone barefoot again!

  • 25 years ago

    I think, Tina, that it is a real shame that you have been put off going barefoot by an unfortunate experience. If you stick to indoors in your own house for the moment, you will get used to it. You might even like it! However if there is snow about, say to your friends that you would prefer to keep your shoes on. Some people, though, like to go barefoot in the snow!

  • 25 years ago

    When I was in HS, I had a friend who's mother I thought was nuts. I had to wear either my shoes or socks because she didnt want oils from feet on her precious carpet.

    OK.. but why could I wear my shoes? Eh who knows. We spend most of the at my house anyway :o) My mom wasnt nuts.

  • 25 years ago

    im a 13 yr old boy and i enjoy going barefoot in my house. as soon as i get in the first thing i do is take my shoes and socks off. when i go round to my friends house he is always in his barefeet too. i would like to be able to take my shoes and socks off whenever i go round but it seems awkward asking. they wouldnt mind me taking my shoes off as that is common but no-one takes there socks off as well were i come from so i dont know what to do.please give me some suggestions.

  • 25 years ago

    As your friend is already barefoot, that must mean that it is OK at his house. Just ask "Do you mind if I take off my shoes and socks. I am sure the answer would be "Yes".

  • 25 years ago

    thanks for the advise , i went round to my friends today and asked if i could take my shoes and socks off. he said it was ok so im glad now.

  • 25 years ago

    I think it is good to ask the friend parents to go barefoot in their house. I never been barefoot to a friends house, but all of my friends don't go barefoot at their houses. If my friends did go barefoot at their house I would too without no problem.

  • 25 years ago

    I like to go barefoot at my friends' houses too. It usually is OK with the parents (and the friende themselves). However, several years back, I had a very similar experience as Michelle, the one whose friend's mother said that she didn't want foot oil on the carpet, except mine was slightly worse. I went over to my friend Tiffany's house one day. It had been cool that morning, so I wore my tennis shoes and socks to school. After school, when we went over to her house, it was 95 degrees in the shade. We took our shoes off at the door and I asked Tiffany's mother if it was OK to take my socks off too. She looked at me as if I'd lost my mind and said, "No you may not! What kind of question is that??" Now, I was downright insulted. If she'd said something like "no, I'd rather you didn't", I'd have been a tad disappointed, but what she said was like totally uncalled for. What's more, both she and Tiffany were barefoot. And Tiffany, who's usually very apologetic - sometimes overly so, did not once apologize for her mother's behavior, like I would if my mother was that rude (which mind you, would never happen - for what it's worth, you can go barefoot in my house any time you want!). I wanted to just leave right then, but I did promise Tiffany that I'd help her with her Algebra (she was a year behind me in school). I did, however, end up taking off my socks after awhile - please remember, I said it was 95 outside and they don't have air conditioning. Now, Tiffany and I hung out together - we still do, occasionally, but we always meet over at my house. I don't enjoy being chewed out for making a simple request. But that was just at Tiffany's house. At all my other friend's houses, I am more than welcome to take my shoes and socks off at the door. And, I almost always do so.

  • 25 years ago

    That sounds really strange as both the girl and her mother had bare feet. Did they really think that your feet would be more oily than theirs?? I think that, as you say, in most cases people are quite happy for visitors to go barefoot if they wish.

  • 25 years ago

    I don't think it had anything to do with oily feet. I think the mother was just psycho. I was wearing socks, as I said, so I don't think it had anything to do with foot odor. I wasn't preoccupied with it or anything, but I tried to figure out why Tiffany's mother not only wanted me to leave my socks on, but jumped down my throat about it. But as I said, I later on took off my socks anyway(unbeknownst to Mrs. Meanie, of course) so I'd be more comfortable. And, as I said, I never went back there again. But I hope this post doesn't discourage any of you who like to go barefoot at your friends' houses. I wasn't discouraged after that unpleasant experience and nothing like it ever happened again. Like I said, Tiffany's mother either had a strudel in her noodle or had a mean streak about her.

  • 25 years ago

    I for one love to go barefoot, and not just at home. I live in a part of the country that is warm enough that I can go barefoot 12 mos/yr. I am always barefoot at home, and often seen that way in the grocery store, post office, mall, etc. When visiting friends I do as they do. If they are shod, I remian that way, but if they are barefoot, well, I jump right in too!

  • 25 years ago

    I go barefoot as much as possible but I will admit that I would NOT ask this of a friend unless we very close and comfortable with her parents. I wouldnt care if someone close came to my home and went barefoot but I will admit I would think they were a little weird if they were a light aquaintance and asked to do so...I dont no it justs seems nervy to me if you dont have a repore! Kinda like the person who just goes into your refrigerator LOL

  • 25 years ago

    Hey Jenn I'm glad you ask that question. I Love going barefoot and really didn't know what to do at my friend's houses. We go barefoot at my house (so if your ever in Bham, Al stop by :) Sounds like a good plan though.

  • 25 years ago

    It is better to know before hand if you are going to be asked to remove your shoes. In my area it is very common habit to take yor shoes off with friends and neigborhs. So when I know it, I can live with it. Like someone else said, it's funny how you can take your sandals off, but if you remove your tennis shoes AND socks, people don't know how to react. I often wear shoes without socks. And if I remove my shoes, I go barefoot. It´s my casual style.

  • 24 years ago

    Well, I am a big barefoot fan.I think u shold jus ask if you can go barefoot

  • 24 years ago

    I had wore sandals before in front of my friends before.
    One time I slipped one off sandals and my friend didn't say nothing about it. So I guess it's ok. Now that it's going to
    be winter that means less barefoot time, I hat
    e that. Thats
    why I like summer the best, because it's barefoot season.

  • 24 years ago

    I guess Barefoot fever (The desire to be Barefooted) is still around on the forum LOL!
    ~Lynn~

  • 24 years ago

    I would like to add a British point of view to your forum,
    I live in Yorkshire in England and I have a strict 'shoes off' policy in my home and do not allow any visitors whether they are family, friends or tradesmen to wear shoes in my home.
    I have no problem with telling visitors to take their shoes off, I even provide slippers in various sizes for visitors who may be embarrassed in case they have foot odour!
    I have had to work very hard to carpet and furnish my home so it is logical not to allow shoes to be worn indoors.
    Why does anyone need to wear shoes indoors anyway?
    Although a 'shoes off' policy is not universal to every British home it is now considered good manners to take your shoes off when you enter someones home or at the very least ask if they would prefer you to remove your shoes particulary if it is noticed that they are in their socks or slippers when they open the door.
    Many of my family and friends also have a 'no shoes' policy in their homes, it appears to be an increasing trend that is probably due to the popularity of plain light coloured carpets and polished wood flooring.
    I am an electrical contractor and lighting designer and when I visit a prospective customers home to survey and quote for work I take my shoes off, which shows customer care and respect, this creates a good impression with the prospective customer and makes them more likely to offer me the work than another contractor who has trampled into their home in dirty shoes.
    If I am working in an area of a customers home that is carpeted or has a polished wood floor I will usually work in my socks or wear slippers. Obviously there are times when this is not always practical such as when working in roof or under-floor voids.
    All companies should instruct their employees to take their boots/shoes off when visiting or working in peoples homes, for example there is no need for a salesman to wear shoes when visiting a customers home, or for a service engineer, appliance repairman, interior decorator etc. to wear shoes when in someones home.
    For many people it is often bad enough having a stranger in their home, even worse is when they trample around their home in dirty boots or shoes!!!!
    I would be interested to know if other readers have a 'no shoes' rule, and whether they have noticed this is a growing trend.
    I am still amazed that most tradesmen will enter a customers home without removing their shoes or even dirty boots unless they are told to do so, I have even seen floor and carpet fitters (they of all tradesmen should know better) installing laminate flooring and laying new carpets with their shoes on!
    I would be very interested to know if there are any companies who do instruct their employees to remove their shoes, or who provide their employees with slippers.!
    One last thing! No, I don't have a foot fetish!

  • 24 years ago

    It is going to be winter soon and I can't go barefoot out no more. I can't wait until summer comes so I can take those shoes and socks off for months. When it warms up right away I'm going to be barefoot. This coming summer I going to get barefoot a lot around my friends so they will get use to it. May be this summer I will get to go barefoot at a friend. But there isn't that many friends where I live who would like to do it. If I had lots of friends around who would like to go barefoot a lot, I would hang around them a whole lot. I like to show off my feet to everybody. I would have no problem showing my feet to people. Because I have nothing to be embarrased about. I like to be barefoot around people and friends it feels good because I know that they do to. I'm only 15 years old when I get bigger I'm probably going to go out and find some real good barefoot friends. And once that happens everything will be great!

  • 24 years ago

    Groan - here we go again .....

  • 24 years ago

    Please Answer this Poll..

    http://www.misterpoll.com/486547250.html

    Here is a link that might be useful: Shoes off?

  • 24 years ago

    Wow- this thread has been going on for ages! Would be a shame to let it get buried now! I think FIRST you should take off your socks and shoes and scrutinize the feet in question. Go ahead and lean down there and take a good whiff while you're at it. If you have yellow, thick, or long toenails, fungus, or callouses strong enough to walk across burning coals, do the world a favor and at least leave your socks on. That goes double if they stink. I do tennies with no socks in summertime so I know the funk of which I speak. Feel at home until the sun goes down, but NOBODY wants to smell feet or see feet that look like they came out of a Lord of the Rings movie. With all these posts, I am surprised feet ettiquette never came up!

  • 24 years ago

    At the resent blessing of our son's Memorial Garden, I was barefooted out on the patio and when we went to go to the garden, I asked our priest if I needed to go and get my shoes on for the blessing. He is very good natured and said that he thought that he had seen someplace where it said that if this was done outdoors that at least one person was supposed to be barefooted. :o)) I thought that he handled the situation well and we all enjoyed the services. Blessings, irishsal

  • 23 years ago

    I'm 13 and from the UK and I know it sounds really sad but I have a hard time trying to go barefoot, don't know why just do, I never go barefoot in my house, some times @ a friends house when my socks get wet. Down here in all houses you normally have to take off your shoes.

    Here is a link that might be useful: d167.com

  • 23 years ago

    I leave the decision up to guests when they come to my house, but I am almost always barefooted. Friends are welcome to take off their shoes and socks--they can even come over barefooted if they want. I like to be barefooted, and encourage others to do the same if they want, but don't force anyone.

  • 23 years ago

    Barefoot is better than wearing shoes in the home, but there is a problem which several posters have alluded to.

    Bare feet exude a tremendous amount of OIL, which is harmful to carpets and other kinds of floor materials. The oil also builds up over time and acts like a magnet that captures mites, fleas (if you have pets), skin flakes, bacteria, and dirt.

    Also, not everyone has good feet hygiene. Athlete's foot, warts, rashes, and other skin conditions, although rare, can theoretically be passed to others passing by in the offender's oily tracks.

    The best alternative for in the home is a fresh pair of socks, preferably white but other colors are acceptable, and the thicker the better.

  • 23 years ago

    Got a troll here.......and one with a foot fetish!!
    This is the same poster as kansaidan on the other barefoot posts.
    Linda C

  • 23 years ago

    oh wow !!!! it must have been on this forum......
    read the topic

  • 20 years ago

    I know I'm going to be razzed for bringing this back up, but I'll tell you right now, I do NOT have a foot fetish.

    Anyway, I like going barefoot all the time too. But I would feel uncomfortable asking my friend if I could take my shoes and socks off, so what I do is, before I go to my friend's house, if I have tennis shoes on (or any kind of sneakers for that matter), before I go to my friend's house, I change into my flip flops. That way, I can just kick them off and nobody bats an eye.

    I love some of the responses in this forum, like Chris, whose friend's mother jumped down his throat just because he/she asked the friend's mother if he could remove his shoes and socks (since it was hotter than heck outside and the house didn't have AC - it must have felt like 100 degrees inside). Also, Jenn, the one who started this topic. Her friend's mother must have read her mind, LOL!

  • 17 years ago

    I live in Canada and it's best to simply follow whatever that particular family is doing. If they have on shoes you keep your shoes/sandals on. If they have a shoes off at the front door rule then you can simply remove them I would say though if you are wearing socks accompanied with your shoes then keep your socks on, if you want to go barefoot then wear sandals or wear your shoes without socks.

    My Mom moved her accounting business back to home from a rented unit and we see about 10 to 15 clients daily, and in the Summer months many of them arrive wearing sandals. While personally I would prefer them wearing socks when they remove their foot wear it doesn't bother me very much
    It's not offensive if they take them off at the front because thats what we want them to do but it;s better that they wear socks.

    Personally I don't go barefoot in anyone elses homes, unless I know they have carpeting. My feet sweat too much in sandals and when I walk on hardwood or tile floors they make that sitcky sound everytime I take a step, which is why I wonder why my Mom's clients would show up with sandals knowing that they must remove it. Since thats a problem for me I almost always hear my clients feet making the same sticky sound on our tile floors and to me it's downright embarrasing.

  • 17 years ago

    Hi,

    Every family has its own rules and regulations inside the house. I think even though they are your friend you are still oblige to ask permission as a respect to the owner of the house. Thanks.

  • 12 years ago

    When I was in grade school & jr high, my friends and I would go over to each other's houses all the time. My mom had a "no shoe" policy and hardwood floors. Our shoes & socks were left at the door most of the time, leaving us in our bare feet. One of my friend's had an extra toe which would freak my mom out every time.
    I was considered a guest at most of my friend's houses. My friend's parents would always say to make myself at home. I hated wearing shoes, so I would always take them and my socks off. I took well care of my feet, no smell, trimmed nails etc so there wasn't any problem. In fact, a couple moms nicknamed me Tarzan because they always saw me barefoot.

  • 12 years ago

    I rented an apartment while going to college with a friend a few years back. We had many friends over for parties & get-togethers. To keep the carpet clean, we instituted a barefoot policy for any guests except parents. Anyway, we threw a party for some work friends from the theater we both worked at one Friday evening. A young usher managed to sneak in w/o removing his footwear. As the party winded down, I spotted him asleep in our bathtub with his legs hanging over the side. I quickly pulled his shoes & socks off revealing his tan, pedicured yet smelly bare feet! I turned on the shower to wake him & to tell him to wash his feet. He came out of the bathroom later barefoot & clean wearing some borrowed shorts. He thanked me since he had been wearing shoes since yesterday. I reminded him that his parents let guests including me go barefoot at their house, so why couldn't he do the courtesy at my apartment. We sat down on the sofa, propping up our bare feet on the coffee table, wiggled our toes and watched TV.

  • 12 years ago

    Is there a reason that a newly registered member brings up a 13 year old post? And 2 posts within 4 minutes of each other. This discussion has been beaten to death over the years.

  • 12 years ago

    There is a thread on this site that has been ongoing, 4 years! Just search all of the forums. If I remember this right, it's Shoes Off Shoes on. This is a great pissing match between all involved. I have never laughed so hard in my life!

    I could care less! Every home I owned, I had white carpet. Friends would come over and take off their shoes. They all had white carpet, also. There was no question and nothing had 2 B said. Most women have never been in a Men's bathroom at a gas station or a bar. They would then demand that our feet B cut off! LOL

    Check the Shoes Off Shoes on, it was so long the it's in 2 parts!

  • 9 years ago

    I go barefoot everywhere.

  • PRO
    9 years ago

    Funny to read this. These days, so many people REQUIRE their guests to remove their shoes upon entering their house. Do any of you remember the Sex and the City episode where Carrie had her expensive shoes stolen at a party?

    I know people (mainly in the NYC TriState area) who have dressy pants hemmed short with two hems, so that they can wear the pants with their 5" heels, and then turn the hem under when they get to a party where the guests must all remove their shoes.

    SO tiresome...

  • 9 years ago

    Wow this is an old thread but i'd like to comment.


    back about 16 years ago a workman posted about removing shoes when working in someones home. I know here often the workmen wear little booties over their shoes inside clients' homes so as not to track dirt inside.

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