There are two issues you present, the vision specialist visit and increased lighting.
It might be an idea to try an indirect approach for both.
For the specialist, perhaps an afternoon set aside doing several things together- lunch, shopping, and the specialist, to take the focus off of just the visit.

And for the lighting, perhaps a new light wrapped as a gift to make it fun?

Just a few ideas.

Ugh. You have my sympathy. My MIL has macular degeneration, horrible osteoporosis and COPD. She has done a beautiful decorating their home and had a FIT when my SIL pulled up all the layered rugs.

She can't see and can barely walk with a walker but would not accept the fact that multiple, different height rugs in the main living area might be cause her or my FIL to trip and fall.

SIL prevailed but as the DIL, I would have never been able to do the same. Could your husband or one of his siblings speak to her?

This is sneaky but could you gradually change out the bulbs?

Sneaky is withdrawing her money for your own use. Prudent is installing better lighting, even if it's against her will.

I'm curious what you will learn from a low vision specialist. Please report back if you can get her to go. It might be things we can all benefit from knowing, for ourselves or elderly relatives.

You're a good ex-DIL to be helping her. Good luck, it doesn't sound easy.

My daughter is legally blind. She has some vision. Call your Blind school and ask for the vision specialist for a rec. to a low vision doctor. Usually there is one that works with the school.

When I had cataracts and even now, less light is far better. I usually have a light on in another room at night for offset lighting rather than direct in the room I'm in. Stores are a real problem if lighting is over the top. Daughter has the same problem and never uses lights in her house unless it is totally dark.

The above may not relate to your mom with other issues involved.

Yes, I've seen low vision specialists. Both medical (MDs) and techs. In fact, two of them came to my JOB to see what accommodations could be easily incorporated. Light WAS a biggie. I even had a small lamp at my work desk. Various magnifying products were also introduced as well as using Sharpie markers. I had very, very low vision for a number of years until a lens implant. I went from an RX that was very strong to not even needing glasses. What a change that was. (I had two detatched retinas requiring a vitrectomy in each eye.)

My dad has been legally blind since he was a teenager.

He has seen them from time to time. They can provide resources for adaptive living strategies (like putting a sticker with a circle in the middle on a touch screen pad like the microwave, so the user can feel the button), help with resources like the free books available for download from the library of congress, and getting a reading machine. (my dad "reads 1 or 2 books a week, and even has a reading machine to bring when he travels. ) This is NOT books on tape. The files are digital electronic files, and the machine lets the reader adjust the speed of the digital voice. You know how you read silently to yourself much faster than you can read aloud? Well, these readers will read about twice the speed of a recorded voice on tape. It sounds like an auctioneer. But that is the speed that the mind can process "reading". Free to the user.

Thanks for the responses. We are going to talk to her about whether she wants to go to the low vision specialist. I want to go just to see what the options are.

I'm posting this follow-up in case it helps someone in the future. I went to the low-vision specialist appointment with my MIL. It was helpful in correcting a misconception I had - bright lighting in the house is not necessarily what she needs. Her contrast sensitivity is impaired, and bright ambient light decreases her ability to distinguish contrast when she is trying to focus. It explains why she often wears sunglasses - the doctor said that yellow filter sunglasses might help her a bit in the house.

The doctor was able to get my MIL to read small print with devices that reversed the letters from black on white to white on black, enlarged the text, and lit it up. One was a small hand-held device, and the other was a tabletop model with a larger screen.

I could sense that the doctor had more to offer, but, sadly and not surprisingly, my MIL was having none of it. She is always resistant to change, but for a number of reasons, she was about as non-cooperative a patient as you can be - such a waste of a world-class eye institute. The doctor said the state would pay for the reading device ($3,500) but, "I don't want that ugly thing in my kitchen."

The doctor sized her up quickly and didn't pressure her. At the end, she sat next to her and started with, "I don't usually say this to patients this early in the process, but," and then urged her to get a Life Alert pendant and to at least think about what she wants to do in the future when she can't live alone. The only thing my MIL took away from the visit is that she is not going to go completely blind.

Thanks for the update. It's interesting. I'm sorry your MIL turned out to be non-receptive as you feared she'd be. What a shame.

Graywings,
I thought of your MIL and her low vision issue when I read this article. Hopefully it won't be/isn't a problem for her, but thought I'd alert you to the condition just in case.

Here is a link that might be useful: Charles Bonnet Syndrome

What if you changed the lighting yourself w/o her knowing it?

Hhireno, thanks for the helpful article. It's something to be aware of. She has reported strange things with her vision, such as moving her hand towards something but it is in another place. But nothing like apparitions in the house - at least nothing she is telling us about.

Tibbrix, I have boosted the lighting where I can in the house. But she doesn't want any fixtures changed - "I paid a pretty penny for that" ceiling fixture . . . 50 years ago. The doctors say that the familiarity of the house is helpful in her getting around.

Oh, I thought it was just a matter of changing bulbs and wattage.