Software
Houzz Logo Print
sweettart_gw

Only time will heal....

19 years ago

This past Thursday, I had to say goodbye to my precious Missy. She had been in my life for 12 1/2 years and I miss her so much...

I had wanted a black cocker spainel since I was a little girl. When I heard that my daughters classmate's family had a litter, I called and went to get first choice of the puppies. When the pups were old enough to leave the Mom, I went to pick up my choice, but Missy changed my mind-- she picked me-- and since she was still available, I took her instead. She stole my heart-- a beautiful little ball of silky black fur and the sweetest puppy breath... She was always pretty calm and laid back (except for the couple times that she found rattlesnakes in our backyard and barked ferociously- keeping the snakes cornered- until we were able to kill them). She had the funniest way of running-- kind of bobbleing along-- like a fat old black bear. She loved to be petted more than ANYTHING in the world and was just in heaven when you took the time to just sit by her and stroke her back or rub her ears. She truly adored us all, and in her eyes, we could do no wrong. Her love was perfect...

She has been slowly declining for the past couple years, and I've watched her carefully-- dreading the day that I would have to make difficult decision, and hoping and praying that God would see fit to just take her in her sleep. Unfortunately, as is most often the case, that didn't happen...

Missy had slowly lost her hearing and sight-- bit by bit. During the last couple weeks, her blindness and deafness had become complete. The last few days of her life, I would watch her slowly making her way around with her little nose to the ground-- trying to sniff her way to wherever she wanted to go. She seemed to be doing pretty well and she was still pretty strong for her age. But then, she got worse, and seemed to be just in a fog-- lonely and afraid. My heart broke seeing her like that, and I knew that I couldn't put off the inevitible any longer. I prayed and asked for a sign that I was making the right decision, and I believe God gave me not only 1, but 3 signs.

So, I composed myself, called the vet to make the appointment, and drove my sweet baby into town. All the way there, I petted her and told her how much I loved her and how much joy she had given me in her lifetime.

It's bee a couple days now since I placed her lifeless body in the grave that I dug for her by her old friend, Benji. I've cried a lot-- mostly at night. I miss her more than I can express and wish SO much that I could just hold her and stroke her curly soft fur just once more. It's during those dark and quiet hours late at night, that doubt creeps in and torments me-- maybe I made a mistake-- maybe she would have been okay if I had given her more time... I just was so worried that she would suffer and I felt that I owed it to her to help her. If I could have had my way, I would NEVER have chosen to put her down. I just hope and pray that my baby girl knows that I only did it because I loved her that much.

This is one of the hardest times in my life and every time I think of Missy, tears well up again. I know that with time I'll be able to remember her and just think of the happiness we shared, but that day seems so far away right now.

I read somewhere that "the pain is so intense because the joy was so immense". And that is so true. I'm so thankful that I have two other furbabies to help me through this, and pray that, hopefully, they will be with me for many, many years. Pets bring so much happiness into this world, and even though when you lose them, the pain just about kills you, I know I will always have pet in my life.

I'm not sure why I decided to share this today. I guess maybe I'm hoping that I can become convinced again that I did the right thing for Missy. I just need to believe that she understands that I only did what I did becuase I loved her and wanted to help her. I *do* believe that the moment after she took that last long breath and her spirit left her old, worn out body, she awoke in place where she is young again-- strong and healthy and happy--- with all her sight and hearing, no more pain, no more fear or confusion. I can see her running through the green grass, cooling off under a big shady tree, or snuffling through the monkey grass with Benji-- tracking down crickets. I will be so happy to get to be with her again one day-- to hug her, rub her belly, and feel that joy again. The thought of that day brings a smile through the tears...

I'm sorry I've been so long-winded, but I wanted to, in some way, make a tribute to my Missy Girl-- to put down in words how much I loved her. She was a truly special friend!

Comments (8)

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    I'm so sorry for you loss of Missy. It sounds like she had a wonderful life with you and it sounds like you did the right thing. It takes a strong person and devoted pet owner to make the hardest decision for our furkids.
    (((Big Hugs))) to you!

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    I am so sorry for your loss. It's gut wrenching to lose a pet.. I've been thru it many times and it's never easier. Some wouldn't understand but I have cried more for my pets when they died than some relatives of mine. You did the right thing. Ideally they die in their sleep and that has happened to me..some expected and relieved and some not expected and shocked. I DO believe our animals are waiting for us. When you love a creature so much, it can't just end. You'll see Missy someday.

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Thanks for sharing Missy with us. She was a lucky pup to have someone love her enough to do the right thing by her. It's never easy.

    Lisa

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    You said you received three signs that she was ready to go. Trust in those and know that she is at Rainbows Bridge just waiting with Benji to see you again.

    We went through the same thing with our Chelsea in Feb. 06.
    I am sitting here now and looking over at her picture and her little cedar box of ashes. Still haven't been able to put them in the ground. But I also have the pictures of our two 14 month old pups - that I truly believe she had some hand in selecting for us. And they are both asleep on the bed behind me. So I am surrounded by all their love now, including Chelsea's. And that is the same for you. You have your other babies and they will rise to the occasion to help get you through his difficult time. Allow yourself the time to grieve and know that Missy is no longer in pain and that was your last unselfish gift to her.

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    You allowed Missy to be pain free, please allow yourself to lose the pain too :) Sharing your loss is part of the process, so it's good that you did that. When you lose a pet it feels like a part of your own life is gone. Hug the pets you have. I'm so sorry for your loss.

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    I am so sorry for your loss. I had to make that decision before & feel your pain. You did the most loving & responsible thing you could do. I hope your grief eases soon. Terri

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    I just wanted to thank you all so much for your kind words of empathy and support... They have been such a comfort over these couple days. I can actually see the light at the end of this tunnel. I still miss Missy and I'm sure I always will, but I can think of her now without such guilt. I think she knew that I was only trying to ease her pain...
    Thank you for helping me to believe that. I am so thankful for the internet. There are certainly a lot of negative things associated with the internet, but I have met some amazing friends online and I count all of you in that group. Thank you again...

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Our animals are pure positive energy, they love us without judgement. Missy had the best life a dog could have and you know you did the right thing...the kindest act you could do for her.