I agree.

I think my rooms end up looking a little stiff.

I find it interesting that if I look at photos that appeal to me, sometimes the details are things I would've never looked twice at and wouldn't of thought to put together.

I think we should all decorate with what makes us happy but at the same time a few containers in the attic full of stuff that I love that just doesn't work.

I'm not sure how to learn that special knack.

Finding a "suitable" (and that term changes for every room -- and depends on the Reason and The Season) visual and usable balance is key.

Also -- Rotating and Re-Organizing By Reason-or-Season helps too!

I am not a planner - personality wise. Well as far as finances, etc. that kind of thing of course, but cannot stand having my days planned out, I'm somewhat impulsive, spur-of-the moment. So, I guess it's not surprising that my personality reflects in the way I decorate. I hate themed rooms and matchy-matchy. It's just not me/us. On the other hand, I don't think you can just throw everything together and it come out looking good. There has to be some relation. I'm all about using things we love and that have meaning to us in our home. After all, you want YOUR personality to shine through . . .

tina

Whichever you do, you have to understand how to do it well and have a good eye.

A purely monochromatic or very tight palette is the most difficult to pull off, to the extent that with everything that is available out there, it sometimes requires something to be custom.

A fully eclectic room is also hard to pull off because it has to look completely unplanned, and yet it can't be. There has to be an underlying discipline to the whole process in order for it to work. In fact I think this is easier for a person whose tastes Never change, to pull off than it is for someone with mutable or fickle tastes. The person whose tastes never change can add to the room for years because they generally have a strong idea of what it is they like.

So, the easiest room for most people to pull off is the coordinated room where there is a rug or signature fabric that drives the palette. The stiffness comes in because the room tends to end up rather formulaic, with the primary color, a secondary color, and accent colors, as well as a primary pattern and a bunch of solids or textures, or *maybe* a secondary pattern or two but many people are afraid to do this. It makes a nice room but its not something that can be added to very easily because the casual observer can pick up the "formula" right away, vs. the eclectic room, which is not so easily deciphered.

I'm too impetuous to be planned, but my rooms end up looking like it. And not in a good way, in a matchy-matchy way.

E.g. I will know I want bedroom furniture, but just shop around until I see something I like. I generally buy whatever pieces I want from the same suite b/c I'm really no good at mixing pieces together. I think it looks fine when it's done well, but I can't do it. I focus WAY too much on the details.

I have a perpetual challenge of overcoming minutia. (e.g. this one is matte, but thatone is glossy, but this one is distressed and that one is new...). Right now I'm trying to select some artwork to go with bedding that has strong brick shapes, and I'm having a hard time detaching from artwork that isn't also having a brick motif, or strong rectangle... grrrrr.

I totally agree with palimpsest, and it is funny that this question came up, because I have just been wrestling with it. The house I live in now is my first house. (I previously lived in big cities in apartments.) I've been decorating from scratch. The house I grew up in had an "eclectic" decorating style that really wasn't all that planned, but it all worked really well because my parents had lots of very nice antiques handed down through the family, tons of old books, lots of musical instruments, Persian rugs, etc.. They just HAD this stuff, and when you've got that sort of stuff to work with, combined with an old house with lots of architectural charm, it works. They could follow the same pattern I've tried to follow - put down a rug, and add furniture and artwork - and have a great "electic" "collected over time" and "lived in" look.

In contrast, I live in a brand new house, albeit a traditionally-styled one, but it still lacks the charm of an old house. I only have some antique pieces (of course I am coveting all my parents' stuff.) Most of my stuff is new, and quite frankly a lot of it is mid-grade - not new but expensive high-quality handmade items, but rather machine-made, plywood based, etc.. When I take the approach of putting down a rug and adding furniture, it looks stiff. That's exactly the right word. It looks "HGTV-y" and I am really over that look. The rooms they show on HGTV and other similar channels just don't look lived-in. (Where are the books? They never have books!) Yet when I try to inject some character, adding an antique here and there, and my books, it can end up looking sort of messy. It seems that I am not extremely skilled in getting the "eclectic" look that I want.

Part of my problem, too, relates to a point Palimpsest makes... (BTW I love your screen name) ... my tastes keep changing. I grew up in and once again live in New England. Like I said, I grew up with a lot of antiques - British and American pieces from the 1700s and 1800s. Frequently, I will really try to embrace all that. But then I'll flip through a design book, or a magazine, and realize that I separately LOVE midcentury modern, or whatever. I go back and forth with the styles I like, and not being able to settle on one general one is kind of tripping me up. I also don't seem to have the skill to properly integrate such disparate styles in one room. I think it ends up looking poorly done rather than intentionally eclectic. (See my thread on Marcel Breuer Cesca chairs.)

I've heard it said somewhere that every room should have a touch of whimsy. Along those lines, I like to think that every room should have one unexpected thing, something completely incongruous. That way you can plan or coordinate everything else, which simplifies your decorating, but the "surprise" or off-base item saves the room from stiffness.

For me, a mix of the two works. I'm a planner. I like to know where, when, what, and how (and I think planning is fun). I guess my brain likes a certain order which helps me keep my decor items from swinging far one way or the other. That's good, because I am absolutely not a planner when it comes to that. Most of what I have has been an "opportunity knocks" sort of thing, but it ends up being cohesive (to me anyway!). I think Palimpset is correct about one's taste/style being the overall influence. I love things from a variety of eras and do not discriminate when buying for my home. Somehow, it all finds a place so that it isn't an incongruous effect. To me that means I have some underlying continuity in my choices even though it isn't conscious.

I started a salon-style art wall in my dining room the other day. I gathered all the pieces, looked at them for a couple of minutes and started hanging. No plan and it doesn't look insane, yet...I'm not done :)

I like to think I can pull off eclectic and, so far, no one has told me any different. I may have a permanent case of "love is blind" when it comes to my rooms. Even if I was told it didn't work, I'd still keep it if I loved it and chalk up the dissenting voice to a different aesthetic.

I think a certain amount of planning is necessary such as paying attention to scale and color schemes but the "overly-planned" rooms lack the spontaneity that I like. However we need to keep in mind that some people do like the planned, matchy, and well coordinated look which to me often seems bland and boring.

I tend to buy things I feel I can't live without altho because I've been doing that for so long I have a lot of accessories and sometimes deny myself things I really like. Other times I think I can't live without something and later find I don't like it much and I give away or sell. So my house constantly evolves which is good.

The key to using things you love, if you have a lot of them, is to keep some stored away and rotate periodically.

I do have problems with the eclectic look as it's so personal. Many online pics of eclectic rooms do nothing for me and just look like OP's junk. However I think that's the nature of eclectic and perhaps my eclectic look also looks like junk to others.

I've tried editing my home and continue to do so but there is a limit to what I can tolerate as I'm a 'dyed-in-the-wool' more-is-more type!

I think everyone needs to give themselves permission to decorate with what please them and ignore trends and what others may think. IMO there is a problem with looking at a lot of show-home decor as one's eye becomes accustomed to that ubiquitous staged style and everything else looks too original and different and risky. I prefer to look at rooms that are filled with unique things as it's then easier for me to use what I have in creative ways.

Well, I almost feel like whatever you are naturally, you need the opposite! LOL I tend to be drawn to a zillion different things, as long as they are unique and just speak to me somehow. Left to my own devices, things either remain unfinished or uncoordinated. The most successful rooms I've decorated had a clear vision (generally sparked by an inspiration picture) and a lot of planning. In my bedroom, I didn't put the room together until I had carefully shopped for every single thing. When I put it together, with the added little touches that were mine pre-plan, it just came together so completely.

Now if I can only figure out how to do that in my coming den/LR/DR/kitchen remodel...

Oh, I plan, all right. It just takes me forever to acquire the items in my plan.
At any rate, that's my reason my rooms look unfinished.

I have lucked into most of my furniture at second hand shops or auctions! I always feel like I have won at auctions, which is funny cause what I have actually won is the right to pay more for something than anyone else would:). I do premeasure to make sure it will work were I invision it before I bid on an item but there really has been very little pre thought involved so my home is very random. I did purchase a new sofa with matching chair and ottoman this year so my lr is a little more conceived than the rest of my home.