I haven't been posting on here regularly for some time now, but every once in a while I peek in here. Lately I have read a few posts that had me laughing so hard I cried. I really needed that too!

One that I think is on the discussions forum that was hilarious was about Brazilian Waxing. I had only recently found out about the way you must "stand?" to have that done, and was horrified. Reading the thread was horrific and kinda weird yet... I couldn't stop my self from reading it and lol all the way.
A second one that had me rolling was the one on decorating the back of your toilet and all the toilet seat covers you can buy. I had to share that with my kids and they couldn't believe it, but also thought some of the Christmas one were "kinda cute".

To dredge up old posts you can utilize the "Wayback Machine" at web.archive.org

Here is and excerpt from an oldie but goodie

"I am forbidden by law to shoot them in the city limits, and I can't quite bring myself to put out poison. So every year I sit and watch them very methodically eat every pecan on my large tree before they are even ripe, and drop the hulls and pieces on the ground. I have no idea what the pecans off that tree taste like because I've never gotten a single one. I loathe and despise them and do not find them in the least charming or entertaining. The only other garden pests that come close to irritating me that much are snails. Now THOSE I WILL poison. "

Interesting to read posts go back and forth from saving the squirrels to not and everything in between.

read the whole thing here:
"http://web.archive.org/web/20010101000000-20031231235959/http://forums.gardenweb.com/forums/load/txgard/msg0223583513738.html"

Here is a link that might be useful: Compost Freaks

ROFLMAO, cooperbailey Sue!

Back to our regularly scheduled post. Wasn't there a great post on the conversation side that had 60's and 70's clothing and furniture. That was classic.

I had only recently found out about the way you must "stand?" to have that done,

I didn't comment on that one because the comments were so "out there". You don't stand up.

Recent addition: the decorated toilet thread.

Jeannine - I couldn't bring myself to say anything but "stand?" I just couldn't actually state it again. lol

The decorated toilet thread was hilarious. The pictures that clever people were finding from catalogs...what a great humorous break in the day!

The Widget Post is a classic, I just kept hearing Dr. Zeus in my head when reading it.

Here is a link that might be useful: Another Classic :He Meant Well

No question, all-time classic is in the Home Disasters Forum beginning in 2002 (!): "Cat threw up in washing machine".

Cracks me up every read.

-Lena

From what I've heard you don't stand, but get on all fours? A friend of mine has a daughter that got her esthetician's license, and does waxing, facials, etc. I was horrified when she told me that he daughter does her bikini waxing for her. I wouldn't want anyone remotely related to me doing that.

You only get on all fours if you want the back done and that's done at the very end. There are points when you have to bend your leg, but you lay on your back for 95% of the "job" and 100% of it if you don't want the back done.

If someone is making people stand or stay on all fours for the entire process, they were taught incorrectly or weren't taught at all.

IMO the all-time funniest is the Widget thread, followed by the Brazilian wax thread. Another favorite is Dog in Elk, but that one didn't originate on the GW. For me the best threads don't involve fussing among the posters, but instead are creative and self-mocking. Once the Widget thread got rolling it was hilarious. Too bad it runs off the page!

oh lordy I just read through the widgets thread for, I believe, the 4th time, & it STILL made me choke & turn red for awhile somewhere in the middle.

Luckily, I lived, & will be able to read it again in another 6 months :-D

Dogs in Elk!!!! I have that one saved somewhere....another classic....Yes found it! It isn't GW, but it's SO worth reading...

Here is a link that might be useful: Dogs in Elk

kk's pups and the morgue drawer is the best for me!!

"Wayback Machine" at web.archive.org

Yes, that's it! I asked my friend last night, but his bookmarks had mysteriously disappeared recently. Thanks!

The pictures that clever people were finding from catalogs...what a great humorous break in the day!

Just had to toot my own horn. lol Which reminds me of the "toot your own horn" thread. Anyone remember when the new lady posted a decorating question and her Photobucket account was not locked? Another GW member (won't name, but do remember) was looking through her pictures and posted something like "Umm, I think you need to lock or delete your pictures. There's a risque photo on Page 2." The OP got furious that everyone was looking at the pictures of her BF or DH tooting his own horn! Luckily, I did not see the image, so it was not burned into my brain for all eternity! lol

This thread talking about Brazilian Waxing reminds me of a funny incident at a spa I had a few years back. I received a coupon for a discount on a microdermabrasion at a spa that was opened by a dermatologist. It was about $40 cheaper than my own dermatologist charges, so I thought I would try it out. While I was waiting, the office manager received in a shipment of fliers detailing all the services offered at this new spa. She proudly handed me one and told me I was the first person to receive one. The technician came and got me and took me to the room where my facial was to take place. While I waited in the chair for her to hook up the machine, I read what they offered in the way of waxing services. Under all the usual services, including Brazilian, were services for men only. Including 'Full Anal Waxing', and 'Scrotum Waxing'. I commented to the technician that I would be sort of freaked out by having to do those services. She said, 'we don't do that' and acted shocked. I told her according to the flyer they did. She grabbed the flyer and got on the intercom. Suddenly 5 women descended on the room, each reading the flyer to verify that it did indeed read what I said it did. They were all horrified and a big discussion ensued about what they were going to say to the spa owner, a female dermatologist. It was like a war broke out. There were numerous discussions about the perverts that would be coming for these services, etc. I had to hold my breath to keep from laughing out loud! Part of me felt bad for being the bearer of bad news.
Well, when I asked the technician if she was still OK giving me the facial, she said she was fine. In fact, she gave me a coupon for 50% off my next visit just for letting her know about what the flyer said, as the dermatologist had not bothered to inform anyone about the 'special services'. Guess what...when I went back a few months later, there were no 'special services for men' on the menu!

My vote goes for the widget thread but the fuzzy toilet thread is definately a runner up.

I have had the dog in elk saved on my computer for a few years now. It is so funny. That could happen to me, but I never knew others would have such stupid things happen to them. Oh, well, we don't live near elk but once lived near a stock yard whose owner also owned a meat packing place as well, and yes, the worse things smell, the better dogs like them, and my first sighting of maggots was from just such an incident.

I just have to say that I haven't been here long enough to have read the "Widget" post before tonight, and have to thank all of you for making me laugh so much that tears were coming down my face. By the time I got half way through the posts the outburst of hoohoohoo's and insane laughter upset my two terriers so much they both sat beneath my feet, scratching to get on my lap because they were distressed by my tears and chuckles. Such a hoot!

But, I must say, especially since that post was dated a few years ago, that I thought widgets had gone out of style....?

Widgets will NEVER go out of style. :)

I have 2 favorites: DH Disasters and the 2 threads about Moths in the Home Disaster Forum.

I have a personal stake in the Moths thread because it's a nightmare I dread having to go through again. We still go nuts everytime we see a darned moth in the house.

I never heard from Lainey after that...guess the moths finished her off.

Was that Lainey on the East coast? She just disappeared.

I have a degree and Economics and never were widgets so funny and fun in any of my college classes too many years ago.
Back when I was a lurker I read a thread in the kitchen forum where nomorebluekitchen's 'evil sisters' played a joke on her through...evil posts! Clever, creative and bewildering before the sisters came clean and everyone was let in on the joke.

I remember some of these.... hilarious! Allison, I remember the one that you were describing with the unlocked PB account! I didn't see the pic either...

There was a funny thread about a wife who heard noises in her attic whenever she was cooking (beef stew??) in the kitchen. Her husband was too "scared" to go up and look to see what it was---her descriptions were hilarious!

I missed the seeing unlocked PB thread but I hear about it every so often in posts. It must have been memorable to say the least, or should I say the most.

I remember the 'noises in the attic when cooking thread'. I thought it was in the Home Disasters Forum but can't find it. Didn't they find a 7' tall nest or something up there?

Wasn't there a thread about lightbulbs that was hilarious?

>>>Posted by ideefixe: Fond as I am about any thread about removing shoes, I'd say that "SuzyQ" as a search term pulls up some humdingers.

Yup. I just did a search. Those are always funny. I'll never forget the comment ".....shooting elasticized TV ruffles at each other." I laughed out loud.

I'm still wondering if the blue driveway and vanity plates were Photoshopped? This one is posted on the Garden side of the board:

{{gwi:1983}}

Who else misses Color Me Confused?

a few of us do !! I remember a thread about a horse and a designer and a crazy tale we got to spin, I wish I had copied it.

texashottie, I think you're referring to this thread. And the OP seemed to be borderline insane (I say this in a joking way) to be able to live with this creature in her attic when she could hear it and smell it as it followed her from the inside the wall passage ways.

It started on the Discussion Forum in eBay.

Here is a link that might be useful: something in the attic

What does her plate say? I can't zoom in. :(

Hi Everyone! This forum is becoming an internet sensation, so I just had to join! I haven't laughed this hard in ages! PLEASE tell me the blue driveway is photoshopped! I am laughing so hard that I may need surgery!

I tried to find the original DH Disasters and couldn't, but did find the "revisted" version and it is hilarious!

Here is a link that might be useful: DH Disasters Revisited

I've got a lot of reading to catch up on! Never heard of these threads.

cearab - I can't help but think that the "special" services were placed in the brochure as a joke. Probably by a disgruntled printers helper. I've have heard and seen printing practical jokes before. :) I cannot imagine any man wanting to endure the pain of having a scrotum waxing done. lol

Allison,
It says "wishihadabluekitchen."

ROFL @ kitchendetective!!!!

In the appliances forum, someone's husband dropped his hammer through a hole in the attic floor and it smashed the woman's glass cooktop, that was a classic.

So many funny ones! So many classics! My favorite of all time, though, has got to be the Dogs in Elk thread.
That was hysterical . . . and still is, every time I read it!
Lynn

Those "special services for men" are real -- maybe not at that salon, but I know they're done the world 'round.

(I know because my v. best friend [and my eldest's godfather] gets anal and scrotum waxing and he currently lives in Tokyo, Japan. He's from Montreal [Canada], where he also got it done, and before Tokyo he lived in Johannesburg [South Africa] where he also got it done. Another friend of mine, a good friend [which is why I know this!], lives in Sydney where he gets it done. And still another friend [and another child's godfather] who lives in Denver gets it done. Back in the '90s I was in Ibiza with my Quebecois friend [the first mentioned] and others, and I know it was offered there then. All of these male friends happen to be gay, so I'm assuming it's big in the gay culture. I know other gay male friends of ours like to shave there, but I think for some the pain is part of the pleasure. ??? It makes sense -- women remove so much body hair for bathing suit / intimacy, so why wouldn't men remove it for intimacy?)

Monablair, that is it! Thank you!

Well I was going to say it was morgue drawers or "Kelly's got a man in her drawers" :oP But there was also a thread once about some kind of racoon or other creature living in someone's attic? Lots of frightening encounters trying to get rid of it....I loved that one!

the most recent would be the toilet thread. it's runny to read how neurotic or goofy we all are LOL

I guess the person with the blue driveway does not live in a neighborhood with a homeowners' association. Is that for real? Yowser.

I can assure you that it's for real. Here is the thread from the Garden forums.
Dilly - aren't you afraid of being "reported" for posting that pic? ;)

Here is a link that might be useful: Garden Web thread

I just re-lived the Widget thread and roared again at the hurling cats (thank you, parma and Lena!) but I overheated on the Dog in Elk link!

OMG I have had fun this weekend reading the posts from the wayback machine. I thought I would lose it just now reading Dog in Elk! Didnt seem to be an ending tho? Laughed so much my dogs came up to see what was up! reverb!!

If you follow the link for the dogs in elk, that's the original Salon link, so there's a few extra chat posts in there. Go on to the following page, & skip through a number of posts & it starts up again. The story continues over the next couple of pages.

"There is not enough Almond Milk in the world to solve an event of that kind" :-O

Here is a link that might be useful: Dogs in Elk

For a nice chuckle, if not all-out hilarity, go over to the GardenWeb, to the Amaryllis/Hippaestrum Forum, and scroll to the thread entitled:
"Amaryllis Selection and Planting".

Sorry, can't make the link work. Maybe someone else could? These are the nicest people, oohing and ahhing over each others' buds and scapes, even the most pathetic ones. Which I totally understand, as forcing amaryllis bulbs is a major interest for me every winter into spring.

It's a cute thread, although it does devolve into creepy-crawl-ly stories.

That Dogs in elk is funny. Thanks monblair for posting Trish and the weasel post. (Forgot about that one.) I spent the last hour catching up.

My gosh, there is a forum for everything.

Here is a link that might be useful: Amaryllis link

I came here for some Holiday inspiration and can't stop laughing.

The Widget is a winner. Could you imagine what would've happened had someone asked: "Do you make your guests remove their widgets when they arrive?"

I also never heard the "Dog in Elk" thread but am amazed that no pictures ever materialized.

Thanks for the laughs.

*sigh*
Widget Camp.

I tell you, kids these days just don't know what fun is....

little dog I agree totally. These kids today don't know what its like to walk 3 miles every morning thru the snow just to get to the widget. And every summmer working in the blazing sun just to make sure the widgets get picked. sheesh kids today....spoiled I tell ya.

DH walked 10 miles through the snow for his widgets. He's older than I am. That was before they started finding radiation in widgets, though.

MY mother in law won't stop giving me her old widgets and I have no use for them Help!

Another from Igloo:

Here is a link that might be useful: Remember?

ROFL how did I miss that igloochic thread??!! Actually, looking at the date, I had a usable kitchen by then & was weaning myself away from the GW. (Obviously I'm hooked again)

Oh so sadly, I could relate to almost everything she said! Well, up until the kitchen sinks. And our budget was/is a tad different ;-D

You guys came up with some funny stuff! What fun some of these threads turn into. Here's one from the Kitchen Table last December...

Here is a link that might be useful: Old woman living here....