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Wacky contractor tales

17 years ago

You may remember about how my GC likes to use his experience to tell me I'm wrong after I've fully researched something and/or have an opinion about how I want things. The example I gave was that when I said I wanted Caesarstone, he told me six out of seven of the C'stone counters he had installed had had to be ripped out and he just wanted to save me the extra expense of having him come back to do that. Thanks, I think.

Today, he told me no one in his 23 years of experience in kitchens had ever had pulls on drawers and knobs on the doors below them. No one! I would be crazy.

Yes, people, I am the first.

But that wasn't, in fact, the strangest thing he told me today. He told me the thermostat in my fridge was actually a timer for how long the light should stay on, that there was no way to adjust the temp. I think my mouth was agape. It was surreal. When I showed him the pamphlet where it stated that it was the thermostat, he insisted the manufacturer had told him that.

Does anyone have any better ones? Or do I have the most eccentric contractor ever?

Comments (28)

  • 17 years ago

    Wow, I think that pretty much takes the cake. It's so nice the way he's making sure you don't make any terrible mistakes with your knobs and pulls. And in my refrigerator, that gizmo may look like a thermostat, but it's really the switch for the ejector seat.

    Good luck with that guy. I hope the work he actually agrees to do is good quality, and I hope he learns from the process of working with you. Be strong!

  • 17 years ago

    Yes I have worse (or better) stories to tell but I don't feel like remembering those evil memories.

    The guy may have meant that the "timer" device times how long the fridge cooling motor stays on for, and then turns off for. And he is paraphrasing what he heard once in one long conversation, including something like "Since there is no way to set an actual temperature it sets a duty-cycle routine as an indirect way of achieving a specific temperature result.... "

    I notice in your remarks above that he didn't seek consensus and come to the conclusion with you that cycling on and off sets temperature in reality....

    In my experience when this kind of wacky story is told, and when tall tales are the norm, the guy is borderline fraud and will exploit your weaknesses the more he gets to know you or the couple of you. That was my experience recently, and that has been my experience in the city and region where I live. To say more than that I'd have to start my own thread.

    David

  • 17 years ago

    The one who did my bathroom. Didn't understand that I shave my legs in the shower AND sometimes use an electric razor. The reason this came up, I wanted the shower shelves up higher and an extra receptacle in my bathroom.

    Didn't understand why I wanted fluorescent and incandescent light. Actually told me that I didn't need to wear makeup, so why would I want different kinds of light.

    I finally called his wife and told her that he needed to quit arguing with. We were friends with this couple. After that, she showed up on the job site every day, to make sure he behaved.

    My kitchen contractor deserves a thread all his own. In fact today, we are going to small claims court against him. His bonding company has already paid off what they could, and we are suing him for the rest.

  • 17 years ago

    Evilbunnie, I know, right? It's nice he's looking out for me. ;-)

    David, he works in my building all the time, and actually did the work in my apartment for the previous owner. So I know it's quality because I live with it and I know from my neighbors that he's not malicious or intending to defraud. He's just an odd duck. But that's awful that you have been through that.

    As well, he didn't mean cooling motor at all. He specifically said it was a timer for the light and turned it to zero to show me, "see, the light goes off! Because you have the light timer set to zero." He's really that odd.

    Stephanie, "Actually told me that I didn't need to wear makeup, so why would I want different kinds of light."

    This sounds totally like something my contractor would say!

  • 17 years ago

    I'm with David on the "borderline fraud". I had a few things happen with Jailbird Contractor that should have been red flags. Like when he went looking in the basement for the brand new, boxed undercabinet light fixtures, and came upstairs with ... the brand new, boxed CHRISTMAS TREE LIGHTS (that I had purchased after last Christmas and stashed away for future use). And he was trying to figure out how to use them under the cabinets ! ACK !

    At least I caught that before it went too far. Another thing I was less amused about was discovered after his disappearance/incarceration ... the idiot installed GAS VALVES on the WATER LINES to my new tankless water heater. Urgh.

    I'm glad your contractor appears to simply be eccentric rather than incompetent.

  • 17 years ago

    Here's a good one...

    My mom consulted a well known custom cabinet with a huge beautiful showroom. She wanted to do extended depth 27-30 inch base cabs throughout the kitchen. He informed her that in 27 years of custom cabinet making, he had never heard of anyone doing increased depth cabinets.

    I was flabbergasted, especially since I got mine from Lowes! (Schuler)

    We ended up using an independent Medallion dealer instead where extended depth is not something unheard of.

  • 17 years ago

    Well I must be the 2nd to use pulls on drawers above knobs on doors....but I always knew I was crazy ;-)

  • 17 years ago

    This is small potatoes compared to these stories, but our painters definitely do things their own way. They primed a bathroom, INCLUDING my black cast-iron towel hooks, then acted like I was the crazy one when I called them on it. I mean, you wouldn't prime the towel rack or the toilet paper roll because you're not going to PAINT them, so why oh why would you think you'd paint the towel hooks?

    I also had a knock-down-drag-out when I asked for a sample of paint in semi-gloss to be put up in my dining room. The guy went on and on - this was obviously a mistake by the decorator, he wasn't going to put it up because I would hate it, did little Me even know the difference between semi-gloss and satin, believe me, this will look terrible.... The whole time, I'm standing there with my arms crossed, saying calmly and more forcefully with every repetition, "Put. It. On. The Wall. Please." When I told the decorator later, she laughed because she runs into that kind of resistance with her painter, and she's someone who's used the same crew for four or five houses/apartments and they STILL complain.

  • 17 years ago

    I had an electrician who decided (more than half way through rough) he couldn't do my house because it was too big. Yet he had worked on the Boston Garden, you know, where the Celtics play? (and really how is electrical for a large house different, the wires are just longer, it's not like designing a heating system)

    I also had a flooring guy that lost his ability to speak English whenever I didn't agree with him. His English always worked perfect for DH.

  • 17 years ago

    DH hired our GC while wandering the aisles in Wal-mart. We had just purchased our second home in the small town where we went to college. It needed lots of upgrades (still does). DH saw this guy in a golf shirt with our college logo on the chest. He started talking to him about the game we had just come from. Lo and behold! he had just come from the same game. Then DH found out he was a contractor and hired him on the spot. (How bad could he be? After all, he is a U of X alum, too!) Not only was he not an alum of our school, he was a lying, cheating, stealing piece of work.

    We lived in another town, so we relied on him for much. He would make up problems so that he could solve them and then tell me how great he was. He took the front doors down to have them vat-striped. He told me they were at X's shop. Later, when I was trying to find them, I found out that X's vats weren't large enough to strip them, so they had been taken to Y's shop. Why did he keep telling me they were at X's? Didn't matter to me where they were being stripped!

    Then he told me that he had gotten every last piece of crown molding the molding manufacturer had...they had even taken down the sample and given it to him...and that it was discontinued. After I ran him and his band of idiots off because they were clueless how to install crown molding (I was in town and went to the house to check up on them), I found out that the crown molding was a standard for the molding company and they not only had more but would be manufacturing it for the forseeable future.

    It cost me some money, because I paid for things that were never done, but I can't tell you how glad I was to the see last of him. (of course, I still get to see him at all the games!) His general contractor experience? He installed aluminum siding!

    DH is a kind, sweet, trusting soul. He is always shocked when someone cheats him. Fortunately for him, it doesn't happen too often.

  • 17 years ago

    Just this morning my contractor amazed me with his ignorance once again. First let me say that I have to babysit them. If I turn my head for one second they stop working (for example, yesterday I went to my room for about an hour and when I returned they had done nothing), so I literally have to sit and watch. So as I'm watching them take down the sheetrock in the kitchen this morning, this is what I witness. Sheetrock comes off, GC starts whacking a stud with his hammer (I have no idea why), GC misses said stud and strikes a pipe. There's now a hole in the pipe and water running onto the kitchen floor. Now, I don't have a contractors license, but luckily common sense is one of my strong points. GC is standing there looking completely perplexed. He actually turned to me and said, "Where is all of this water coming from?". I don't know for sure, but my first guess would be from the hole that you just put in that pipe.

    He skirted the issue, and mumbled some excuse that I couldn't understand.

    Wow. That's the only thing I can say. Just wow.

  • 17 years ago

    Thanks for the chuckles, all! :D (I know, I know, it's easy to laugh about it all AFTER the fact...)

    This isn't a tale of ineptitude (although I do have a few of those) but I fell in love w/ my GC's sense of humour (come to think of it, I actually DID end up dating him a few times....) when he & his crew were doing foundation work on my house shortly after I bought it. They put out one of those big yellow road signs in front of the house, altered to say "CAUTION. MEN WORKING. THINGS OUT"

  • PRO
    17 years ago

    your contractor is not eccntric he is ignorant.
    it is a big difference,

  • 17 years ago

    Well, he's ignorant about some things. About others, what I have found from working with him for months is that his M.O. is this: he likes things a certain way and in order to get you to do things his way, he pulls some outlandish statement out of his hat about how NO ONE does it the way you are proposing. I mean, seriously, no kitchen he's ever seen in his life has knobs on doors and pulls on drawers? I would say *most* kitchens I've seen have that. He just personally doesn't like it and he feels like he needs some sort of exaggerated back-up to prove that it's the wrong thing to do.

    So maybe it's more a manipulative tactic.

    And I guess he's known for it, because when I went to the kitchen store that he always works with and priced out counters, and I mentioned, "Jim wants me to get granite," the sales guy laughed knowingly and said, "Jim always wants everyone to have natural stone."

    And thanks all, some of these stories are just unbelievable. Except I believe them.

  • 17 years ago

    My GC insisted that all modern dishwashers are mounted from the top. That is until I emailed him directions for the Miele which shows it mounted on the sides.

  • 17 years ago

    "No Ma'am" the tile is not installed incorrectly. When you use a natural stone there is variation in the thickness of the tiles, which causes high and low areas after a complete installation. The tile was installed right, but the different thicknesses make it seem like they're not installed level"

    (ME) But stupid contractor sir....I purchased gauged tiles :: holding up three different tiles:: which are all exactly the same thickness, and guaranteed to be so, so it appears that your tile guy just hasn't ever installed stone and didn't know what he was doing when he installed a thousand dollars worth of stone that now has to be ripped out.

    "But Ma'am.....that is not the case! This is his fifth floor ::looking over at sheepish tile guy who was sold as experienced:: ummm yes maybe his first stone but they're all the same. But good news!!! We can sand down the high ridges (over 1/4" thick) and make it all flat...no worries!"

    (Me) Ya, you're fired, and I'll send you a bill for the tile!

    (My tile floor number one)
    {{gwi:1459331}}

    {{gwi:1459328}}

    Same contractor:

    "No ma'am, the toilet is completely installed, it just needs the lid and it will work fine"
    (Me) But what about the pipe that's not connected and the extra parts in the box?

    "You don't need those"

    But the pipe...

    "It works on reverse osmossis" (I kid you not!)
    {{gwi:1412994}}
    And my favorite line of all:

    "It will be finished in May (2007)
    {{gwi:1428546}}

    No No September at the latest:
    {{!gwi}}

    No No, just a couple more weeks toward final inspections:
    {{!gwi}}

    BUt to top them all off.....

    NO No, they never pee on the carpet!
    {{!gwi}}

  • 17 years ago

    LOL. These are just too funny.
    As Hubby is GC and plumber and electrician and floor finisher and... I'll leave those stories alone.

    However, we did have a "friend" paint the outside of our house. Claimed to be experienced and we knew he was somehow involved in the building industry in SF at one time so Hubby said go for it (without consulting me...). It was a huge, huge nightmare. Best moment was seeing him arguing with our roofer and the county building inspector about how the shingles were installed. Stupid idiot did some "extra" work that he said roofer should pay for because he did it wrong (without consulting wither of us). Both inspector and roofer told him he was dead wrong. Guess who wound up with the cost?

    Very, very cute puppy pic, i-chic!

  • 17 years ago

    Igloochic, how could it be September '07? You started a thread (Remodeling forum, I think) in early May '07 (Question for contractors on providing my own sub) and you didn't even have a signed contract yet.

  • 17 years ago

    oofasis, this was just a funny story thread so I didn't check dates...I just threw out some of the dates we had as final's during our remodel. Actually that tile bucket picture was taken in July 07 (I checked after you asked just for fun).

    I began this remodel in August 06 (Started the bid process and hired a contractor in mid September 06). I remember the dates clearly because my son was less than a year old at the time and we had do to an emergency six weeks in the hospital in Cincinatti and I spent my first anniversary there away from home with the baby. When we returned, our first contractor had had a horrible accident on another site. The result was a broken back and I had to go back to square one.

    The good thing about that was (or was that good) that we decided that as long as we were going to do the kitchen, we might as well just do the whole house. So we started working on engineering, etc., and when I hired the next contractor, I didn't like his subs, and wanted to bring my on....which is probably why the post was up about that time. We moved into the summer kitchen that year (I have lots of pics from our garage kitchen).

    ANd for the record, since we've fired another contractor....we'll be starting silly questions like that again soon. (Actually the new guy starts Monday).

    You're keeping too close of tabs on my remodel disaster....what's happening in your home? :oP

  • 17 years ago

    Igloochic....off topic, but is that your Havanese?

  • 17 years ago

    Oh, Igloo, thanks for that, it made me laugh and laugh! Mine was supposed to be done end of October. Then by Thanksgiving. Now I am hoping for this year.

    But yours takes the cake, I swear.

  • 17 years ago

    We've tried to make it a lasting memory becca LOL (eyes rolling) I just hope it ends soon!

    And amela, he's A Coton de Tulear. I gave him to my husband for his birthday. He's kind of a cross between a barf bag and a dust mop....or a pee pad and a dust mop? Anyhoo, we like him despite his issues LOL

  • 17 years ago

    For us, it was going thru 2 general contractors before firing them and doing it ourselves.

    The first one did excellent work, came highly recommended, until we found out he had a severe drinking problem with several DUI's. Upon interviewing a former client of his, we found out he would show up 3 hours late, make himself drinks in the house, the whole job took twice as long, and that client would never hire him again. But his craftsmanship was flawless! Go figure. So we offered to still use him if he went into professional counseling to deal with his alcoholism. He blew up, we walked away from the deal, and found another one.

    The second one we used to fix a rental house we bought to live in while the main house was being done. All he had to do was install an IKEA kitchen, refinish the wood floors, remove the popcorn, and take a wall out. Simple enough. When we saw the wavy uneven floors (he refused to rent a new machine and tried to use an old one he got a "deal on"), along with the puddles of dried polyurethane (we actually thought the dog had pee'd on the floor!), and the inept help he got (they couldn't even install IKEA cabs properly), we fired him on the main house and withheld payment. Of course, he cried foul and tried to make a stink about it, but one of us is an attorney, so we know our rights! LOL

    We ended up general contracting the main house ourself, it turned into a year long total gut job renovation, I had a great team of subs, we only made a few mistakes along the way, and I gained a profound respect for general contractors.

    And the money managing skills I gained that year actually paid off...in my main job I was asked to fix and maintain a multi-million dollar departmental budget, which was a piece of cake after doing a house.

  • 17 years ago

    We have five coton de tulear dogs. You know how people talk about how their dogs are such good judges of character that if their dog likes someone, they must be OK? Don't count on that with a coton, they love everyone. So, don't could on the puppy to help you weed out the workers:)

  • 17 years ago

    LOL Hollishenry....I was just telling my husband we'd have no issues fulfilling the part of the contract that said we couldn't make him a guard dog heh heh He's not exactly picky....he loves young and old, big and small, but especially small who drop crackers..he'd probably just follow a crook around hoping to be petted heh heh

  • 17 years ago

    Igloochic... humm... a dog doesn't look like a baby... you and your husband need to stop messing around with bad contractors, all these houses and start getting a little busy .... the house can wait... (if it is meant to be). (can you tell I'm not a dog person)

    Thanks for the laughs... now I remember why we are DIY even though it takes us years since we are on slow mode. :)

  • 17 years ago

    when we remodeled our last home i had a stone fabricator tell me soapstone wasn't a natural material. this was right after he told me the onyx slab i was admiring was a "new granite".

    and when i was expecting my first baby, i hired a man to re do a closet for the nursery. i wanted double haning rods. when he finished the closet there was only one rod installed. i reminded him about the second rod and he told me that wouldn't work because the 6' space wasn't tall enough. i told him they were for very small clothes and he giggled, "huh, ha ha... yeah..."

    i was just thinking today that if most of the people in the world are idiots, than maybe i am among the smartest ...in which case we're in a HELL of a LOT of trouble.

  • 17 years ago

    Igloochic, sorry if I was confused. Spring of '07 was when we were getting serious about our remodel and I was searching GW for contractor and remodeling information. You were on a million threads in lots of forums (LOL!) with similar questions of your own, and I guess I thought that we were on parallel timelines. Of course I followed your progress -- we all have! LOL! I had saved and re-read so many of those threads in April and May of last year 'cause the info was pertinent to what I needed to know. I just assumed you were about to begin your remodel, which I guess is why this post confused me.

    As for our reno, we finished with what we'd contracted for last November (two room additions, a second floor deck and enlarging and remodeling the kitchen), but as I know you know all too well, our original budget didn't get us quite as far as we'd hoped. Since then we've replaced the flooring throughout the house, dug up all our concrete outside and poured new stamped concrete (it's colored and textured and looks like Roman tiles that have been here forever -- it's wonderful!), we've added window treatments throughout the house, and undertaken the 3 bathrooms by contracting out the work when we have the cash to pay for it. We've replaced quite a bit of furniture, too, and that's kind of ongoing. And while all this may sound like a lot, it's nothing compared to the topsy-turvy world you've been in.