Hey there! I'm fairly new to these forums, but you might want to actually post in the Kitchens Forum Discussions section - I don't know how much traffic Conversations sees, but you're sure to get folks chime in at Discussions. Good luck! We're at the end of having Black Pearl granite installed, and at least for now, I'm loving the choice of the surface itself. Ours, too, is a busy kitchen, and no way did I want to worry about babying anything.

We installed soapstone counter tops in our farmhouse style kitchen last year. WE LOVE THEM. Yes, soapstone is soft, but the glory of it is that it develops a patina over time. We went to see a desk that had a soapstone top -that top had been heavily used for about ten years and the patina was beautiful. Soapstone feels marvelous and velvety. In spite of it's softness, the weird thing is that it basically absorbs NOTHING, so it simply doesn't stain. What it does do is show small scratches or nicks over time and it also tends to darken over time. It has a matte finish and is always in the gray color family. It looks fabulous with our moss green cabinets. Anyway, if you want a polished, glossy, perfect finish look, it is NOT the right choice - just putting that out there. It is extremely low maintenance and requires no sealing, but you can darken and gloss it up a bit by rubbing it down with mineral oil occasionally. It fades after a few days but over time that will darken it more quickly. You can get soapstone with beautiful white and even green lines in it or you can get it with an almost solid gray look so there are some variations out there. To me, it looks best in vintage or farmhouse style kitchens, or industrial style kitchens. The first two pictures I took this morning - the counter tops are not oiled at all and this is one of my busiest "work stations" - I am constantly standing here mixing, cutting, moving stuff, etc. The second picture is of a few scratches - these are easily buffed out if bothersome but to me they're not bothersome at all and in fact if I oil the surface down they disappear. To me this is part of the natural aging part of soapstone. The third photo is of some of the striking green elements in our soapstone - this is not oiled. The photo after that is after we rubbed mineral oil on the same section. The final two photos are from a distance, after a quick rub down with mineral oil.

I agree with lazy - depends on soapstone variety. We have the anastacia variety; may be one of the harder soapstones. I'd post a pic, but I've posted so many, ppl are tired of seeing I'm sure.

Soapstone is soft, not fragile. There is a difference. It's actually less likely to crack or chip than granite, which is harder, but also more brittle.

I am a fabricator.

I would not consider soapstone a high maintenance countertop, quite the opposite, in fact. Granted it is much softer than granite but most scratches can be readily obscured with the application of a little mineral oil and, if deep, a little light sanding. The honed granite will definitely be more durable but IMHO is nowhere near as pretty as the soapstone. The granite does NOT need frequent sealing (once a year is usually enough) and etching granite is very uncommon. (the only compound typically in a household that can etch granite is the active acid in various rust removers.) Staining is also very uncommon particularly if properly sealed.

I have owned a granite shop for 14 years and have still only seen about a dozen instances where someone actually managed to stain their granite.

I have a soapstone sample and a honed black granite sample. Like oldryder said, the soapstone is so much prettier!!!! I would be more worried about the honed black granite. I'd worry that the 'chalkly' appearance and texture would be a magnet for messy kitchen hands...and leave oily splotches all over, requiring cleaning and polishing daily. oldryder, Is honed black granite hard to keep looking nice? I would think it is.

I've had my soapstone counter top for two years now, and no way do I "treat it like grandmothers antique furniture" ...quite the contrary, I pretty much treat it like a shop workbench. Mine is a medium soft Brazilian stone called Mariana. I oiled it for the first couple months, but then decided to let it go naked... Absolutely maintenance free!

Wish I'd known about Soapstone 30 years ago, best counter material I've ever worked on!

I'll echo what others have said that depends on the particular soapstone. When we were considering it, I went to a stone yard and asked for a sample of a soft soapstone and a hard one so I could get a feel for the range of hardness. They were markedly different in how easily and deeply they scratched, so I'd suggest trying them out to see what you think. I think it's a beautiful material, especially the stone with more light veining, but the lighter ones are softer.