You Can't Make Up This Stuff

10 years ago

Dear Mr. and Ms. Potential Customer:

I can see why you fired these guys. That is one of the most insane kitchen pictures I've ever seen and I've been doing this a long time. Of course your granite is cracked at your front sink rail. How could it not be after that?

We won't be able to use an apron front sink to eliminate the crack either because your granite sink opening is wider than the front of the sink base cabinet. The cabinet had its sides "scooped" to get that sink to fit, I'm sure.

The only way I'll become involved in this job is strictly time and materials with no guarantee on additional top or other breakage or the fit of replacement cabinets in relation to the existing tops. I will remove the granite, store it safely on site, install replacement cabinets, reinstall the tops and repair the crack(s). Unfortunately, on a job like this, I cannot allow the repair(s) to be subject to customer satisfaction approval. With that in mind, top replacement may be a more cost effective alternative than you previously anticipated.

Let me know what you'd like to do, please.

Sincerely,

Joe

Featured Answer

suzanne_sl

10 years ago

Mr. and Ms. Potential Customer should seriously consider taking the opportunity to do a re-design on that kitchen. They may come to realize that, barring abject poverty, the flood was the best thing to happen to that kitchen. You might suggest that in more diplomatic language.

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Comments (9)

melle_sacto is hot and dry in CA Zone 9/
10 years ago
what happened - were they having the base cabinets replaced?
cpartist
10 years ago
What happened? Flooded?
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PRO
Joseph Corlett, LLC
Original Author
10 years ago
Flood damage.
cpartist
10 years ago
Good point suzanne.
User
10 years ago
I can see how someone could get the old cabinets out by breaking/cutting them down, but what was the plan to slip the new cabinets in?
PRO
Joseph Corlett, LLC
Original Author
10 years ago
Stan Z:

Thanks for making the point of this post. Yes, you can break cabinets out from under countertops, but just like the picture a friend of mine posted of a sunken "conversation pit" living room design of the 60s, it is proof that just because you can do something doesn't mean you should.

This is not only impractical, it is dangerous. I'll bet there is no horizontal support spanning between the dishwasher and refrigerator and stone has little strength in tension. It is a much more difficult job to safely move the stone from these "supports" than it would have been from the existing cabinets. I could have probably removed this stone without fracturing it at the front sink rail, the fracture that was the reason they called me.

Where on earth these guys thought they were saving money and time by attempting to do this job like this, I'll never know. They did gain a firing to add to their resume, so there is that.
ILoveRed
10 years ago
Was this something encouraged or endorsed by their insurance company to reduce the cost of the claim?
PRO
Joseph Corlett, LLC
Original Author
10 years ago
ILoveRed:

I wish I knew the answer to that question. I do know that you aren't going to be awarded any more insurance work or be recommended by an insurance company if you get fired by customers repeatedly.

I rarely allow anyone to tell me how to do my job. Not customers, not insurance companies, not engineers or architects. Maybe the occasional building inspector.