The currant shelving overpowers the fireplace. If you must rebuild, I'd consider something lower than the mantel.
A few questions: are you bringing furniture w you?
Is an eat-in option important to you in the kitchen? For how many?
Is the current storage and lay adequate to your needs?
Do youu have a color scheme (or schemes) in mind?
Does the budget include electrical/lighting improvements?
The answers will give you a starting point.

Here are a few simple DIY updates to help you get started:

1- change out the light fixtures. Pick flush mounts and chandeliers from 1 collection and finish to maintain a consistent look around the house. Kichler is an affordable brand with many choices.

2- paint trim and book shelves white. (You can also change out baseboards to a taller style before painting). Sand, prime with good primer, sand, and finish with Sherman Williams ProClassic (worth every penny on woodwork painting). Lightly sand between coats for a professional finish. You can save the fireplace for last, see if you want to keep the stained contrast, or convert to white.

3. Kitchen cabinets-start with new, updated hardware, and consider getting appliances that match in your choice of finish. You can then decide if you want to paint the cabinets or keep them.

4. Kitchen counters. Newer countertops can give you more years on the stained kitchen cabinets if you are not ready to change them out yet.

5. Wall color. Softer muted tones are more current. Staying within 1-2 color cards can enlarge the space and, again, keep the transition from room to room smooth and welcoming.

Have fun!

Kitchen, you can paint the cabinets to white, there are different shades of white that makes that kitchen looks bigger.
Please change the light fixture to something transitional, paint the kitchen and the family room one color. Right now they look separate. Door frames can also be painted white. Please remove all the plants from the top of the cabinets that style is outdated.
Dining - colors, swags and carpet has to go. The room looks small because of too many bold colors. Unless you put the table, the light fixture is too low for now.

Family room- Replace the book shelves transitional white shelves to match with your kitchen, So does the mantal and based board. If you don't care of shutters, please change them to honeycomb shades.

Paint is definitely your friend when it comes to getting the biggest bang for you buck! The overall feel for the rooms is fairly traditional: is this your preferred taste also or do you like more modern lines and details? Your husband may only have to remove the more traditional trim on the bookcases, maybe expand the shelving up to the ceiling, and replace the trim with a more shaker detailing. White paint and mirror backing in the shelving units would add depth and bounce the light round a bit more. Unifying it all with the mantle and room trim, maybe with a deeper paint color for that wall only would complete the look. The kitchen is definitely where the bulk of your work will be and I would start by thinking of the ways you want to use the kitchen as your starting point. How many cooks typically work at the same time, does your company always gather in the kitchen? How much counter work space does the current kitchen have and how much so you want? What is the storage capacity: can you improve it by adding lower cabinet roller drawers rather than replacing everything. Also look at the existing boxes of your cabinets: new doors can completely change the look at a fraction of the price of completely new cabinets. Would turning the kitchen around by removing the peninsula and adding a lengthwise island with bar seating, and pushing your table closer to the wall by adding a seating banquette make better use of the space? The peninsula cabinet could make up part of the island, adding taller upper cabinets at right angle for bar seating and extra storage. Don't forget to take a thorough look at lighting: the kitchen is first and foremost a workspace, and thinking through a good lighting plan with the attendant electric supply needs is essential. Adding elements such as pendants, chandeliers and other ceiling fixtures brings your design together. Finally the finishing touches, such as your backsplash, knobs and pulls, countertop material and furnishings will truly make it your own. I didn't even mention the appliances: be aware that not all stainless steel appliances are created equal: do some careful research, price shop online then go to a reliable local vendor to purchase for best customer service results.

I definitely like the more modern lines and details - the dated look of the wood trim, the shutters, and the shelving around the fireplace is just awful. (Ironically, the seller paid extra $$ to have all these things put in and didn't understand why no prospective buyers liked them - the house was on the market for ages). As part of the contract, we had her replace all of the carpet to a neutral beige. We aren't moving in for another week - none of the furniture, plants, or decor is in there anymore. There is fabulous storage - the door on the left in the kitchen is a pantry - my husband is going to install rolling shelves. We aren't much on formal dining and rarely have company - no kids, we both work full-time, school full-time and military part-time. My vision for this house is something fresh, crisp (yet homey), modern, and we plan to sell in 2-3 years after I finish graduate school - so I'm definitely trying to keep resale desirability in mind. I need to take a closer look at the lighting - it's just so hard for me to envision it while the dark paint colors are sucking the life out of the room. Definitely want to paint the kitchen and living room the same color - thank you for reminding me of that detail. When you say "softer muted tones" for wall colors - what do you mean? Beige and earth tones?

I would consider an overmantle to the ceiling for the fireplace and putting the tv over fp for a more modern look, it has to go somewhere. you can see where tv is now it makes all the furniture go on one side of room..loose the tall shelving beside it, possibly have hubby build out to the sides of fp about 2/3 of way up...look at houzz for ideas....are those wooden stained plantation shutters?, if so I would keep those, no curtains, and consider keeping all the stained moldings and trim as it goes over probably your entire house.........grays are the thing for paint these days, so are soft aqua/blues...paint all walls the same color......definitely new lights, all kitchen appliances the same.....add crown molding, a good project for hubby.....congrats on your home...have fun

I know that painting the trim through the house is a pain, but its probably the best way to inject a "new House" feel and correct the ugly situation in the living room. Even though it's only the 2 of you, if the house has multiple bedrooms and you are looking to re-sell in a few years, if you do it well, the kitchen is what will sell the house.

Paint the trim white and you may find that some of the dark colors aren't that bad!

tmoose, there is a kitchen someone posted in the before and after section in the past day or so that you should look at. Amazing transformation that I think could work for your kitchen.

"Just completed our Kitchen remodel" is the post I meant.

Excellent - thanks everyone!

Start on one room at a time. If you Paint the trim and kitchen cabinets white as well as painting the walls in current colors, you will see a mass improvement! We are in the process of updating our new home, it can become overwhelming if you try to focus on everything at once. Taking it one room at a time allows you to relly get it the way you want! Good luck

tmoose, see "goodbye 90's kitchen" as well!

The rooms are in need of some updating, but that is part of the fun when buying a house (in my opinion). I'd like to address the kitchen. I think the first thing you need to do is paint the kitchen and dining room one color. This will help to bring a unified look, as well as create a larger appearance for your kitchen. My suggestion would be a lighter green, blue or gray. My choice would be Aganthus Green by Benjamin Moore- http://www.benjaminmoore.com/en-us/paint-color/aganthusgreen

Next, I'd purchase new stainless appliances to match with the refrigerator.

Then, I'd install a new backsplash, possibly a mosaic or subway. I think for this kitchen a Bronzite subway would look good with your cabinetry- http://www.granitetransformations.com/southjersey/products/mosaic-tiles/colors/subway/

Finally, a new countertop is a must. The one you currently have isn't bad, but I think a granite countertop would drastically improve the look of your kitchen. I think our Terra Chiara would look great with the paint, backsplash and cabinetry. You can see it here- http://www.granitetransformations.com/southjersey/products/granite-countertops/colors/

Good luck with your remodeling, I hope this helps!

Check out the updates this fabric designer made to her new family home. I think she faced much greater challenges than you do...
http://camilleroskelley.typepad.com/simplify/2012/04/the-house-house.html

I would paint the kitchen cabinets white and pick a color for the walls. Maybe change out the backsplash...
Rip out the carpet and add hardwood floors if they are not there already...Paint the other rooms. Add white crown molding in the living room. You can probably keep the bookcases next to the fireplace if you paint them to match the trim paint color...I would keep the fireplace it as it is...it is lovely. The light fixture in the living room needs to be replaced or better integrated...(like painting the fan blades the same color as the ceiling)...If you have any money left I would change the sliding glass doors for french doors.

Have fun!

If it were me, and especially considering that you are in grad school AND planning to sell in less than 5 years, AND more importantly, you haven't moved into the home yet, I would paint the entire non-sleeping / living area on that floor the same neutral color (not beige but something a bit more daring like a really nice, light, coffee color, or a warm, beigy grey), and all the trim in those rooms the same white (like Benjamin Moore Cloud White or Dove White), including the kitchen cabinets. (Have the cabinets sprayed at the same time as everything else, before the new carpet goes in, but take the time to prepare your surfaces very well before painting, especially the cabinets and other wood surfaces).

This will immediately give you that more modern feel, a clean backdrop on which decorate with your favorite items and colors, and something that will appeal to future homebuyers and make it easier for them to envision their own things in those rooms.

I'd also keep those built-in shelves but paint them the same white you paint the trim and the fireplace. The color of the natural wood and the color of the walls "inside" the bookshelves being the same color of the rest of the wall are what is making them feel hokey to you. Once you paint the units white I'm sure you'll feel better about them, plus a future buyer will probably like to have them. I would paint the wall behind the same white as the wood, or maybe something pretty like a periwinkle blue which you see a lot in the backs of bookshelves for some reason. Or maybe a pretty lilac? (whatever soft pastely color you love).

For the lighting, I would not go cheap or go with what's hanging around at the home improvement stores. I would go to a lighting showroom, AFTER the painting is done, and with pics showing how much natural light you get in each room, what the kitchen cabinetry looks like, and what the outside of the house looks like. Because honestly, the style of the house itself is going to matter as much as what you like. And while I was at it, I'd put all my overheads and fixture lighting on dimmers.

Have fun!

Quick comments to a lot of already good notes;
Kitchen
Crown moulding in the kitchen, it will fill in the space between the ceiling and the cabinets for a lot less than changing the cabinets.
Invest in pot lights for the kitchen - low cost but adds a modern twist
Consider garden door in the kitchen with either a magnetic blind or blinds within the door glass..........can't see the whole door but it appears old
Baseboard - change to larger and paint all trim white
Kitchen table light - anything but what you have is an improvement. Maybe even just pot lights.
If there is still money in the budget, change counter to granite with a nice modern glass tile for back splash

Living room
Remove shelving........leave the bottom cabinets Could put matching granite on the tops of these cabinets like the kitchen. There is too much trim/moldings that don't blend together. Put the TV on the lower right cabinet. Get rid of the cabinet where the TV is on now. Balance the other side with either a picture or tall vase/decoration of sorts. Putting the TV over the mantel is nice but you have a bit of an issue with having chairs/couch facing the TV. To be functional, there needs to be comfortable seating facing the TV. The room is deep, not sure what type of furniture you have.

Other room (what is it?)
Paint is your best friend. Keep it neutral.

If you have money in the budget, hardwood floors in there would lighten the room.

Good luck!

All the woodwork gets painted white. Kitchen cabinets go all the way to the ceiling in white. The shelving on either side of the fireplace comes out with no shelves rebuilt--it's already a narrow space and too heavy at that end of the room. Mantel lowers and changes to white. Wood blinds go from stained to white. Sliding glass doors in kitchen change to french doors (hope you don't need curtains but if privacy is an issue think about white wood blinds there, too). New countertops in light gray soapstone or granite. I like your idea of the same color of paint in the kitchen and living room. Think of a smaller table for the kitchen. You must have great vision because no one else could see past the mix of bad paint colors! Hope this is helpful.

Kitchen: I would paint the kitchen walls the same color as the next room; it looks dove grey. Then paint all the wood trim white. Paint the kitchen cabinets a medium to dark grey and paint the table top the same color. Replace the light fixtures.

If it were my kitchen the first thing I would do is lop off that bar and install a modern styled island. The bar definitely dates the kitchen. I think that would greatly increase the resale value for you. Of course you would need to do the painting and hardware mentioned above. Consider moving the microwave below the counter, maybe in the island. Change the backsplash adding a decorative piece above the range. It would make the kitchen feel more spacious. Granite counters would be a real plus.

hmmm.... and ditch the ceiling lamp. That would be another huge improvement. Go for LED lighting.

Most of all, enjoy the process. It will be a lot of fun.

On the fireplace wall, how about making the shelves on either side go away entirely with the fireplace redone to have clean lines and shelves to ceiling.
Or same w this extending to cabinets on either side of fireplace leaving eye level free for well chosen artwork with the frames kept light in design so as not to clutter the space.
Or create a full wall treatment that includes the fireplace and goes floor to ceiling with some closed and some open shelving. Some of the open shelving could open to a large enough space for it to function more as a nook to hang a picture within. Again keeping frame simple so as not to make cluttery atmosphere.

New kitchen cabinets would be such an expense, besides 11 years is not that old! Try changing out the light fixtures and cabinet hardware and maybe purchasing a new counter top. If you have a slightly larger budget, purchase a new stove and dishwasher to match your fridge. Living room: paint the fireplace suround and bookcases a crisp white, tone down walls to something more neutral and replace carpet if budget allows. Same idea for dining room, a more neutral wall color would help and replace the blue carpet.

Usually I'm very thrifty and aware of being wasteful too but in this case I think you could donate those cabinets to Habitat for Humanity or use them in a garage. They ruin the look of the kitchen mainly because they're so short. The new owners want to sell in a couple of years so it's an investment that they'll most likely get back and appeal to a broader base of potential customers.

I would resurface the cabinets to a white color to make the room brighter and larger. You can even paint the walls a light color which makes the small space look lager as well. It looks like a nice space to work with...good luck.

LED Under Cabinet Lights would help bring some balanced light to your kitchen. Our line of Modular Lights are energy saving, dimmable and easy to install.
Modular LEDs: http://www.environmentallights.com/led-under-cabinet-lighting/environmentallights-premium-modular-led-under-cabinet-lighting.html

Strip Lighting or Light Bars or Pucks would look great inside glass fronted cabinets too!
LED Light Bars: http://www.environmentallights.com/led-under-cabinet-lighting/environmentallights-high-brightness-premium-led-under-cabinet-lighting/under-cabinet-light-bars.html

LED Pucks: http://www.environmentallights.com/led-under-cabinet-lighting/environmental-lights-led-puck-light-and-downlight-kits.html

Good luck with your new projects!

To start just apply a coat of primer to all 3 rooms...with all a somewhat blank slate you will have an easier time picking what color and other changes you want to make.

Kill the light fixtures

If you are moving in a few years paint light neutral colors, light gray or whites or beige. Paint baseboards. Replace kitchen cabinets or paint them. As far as shelving by fireplace i wojld keep for resale value. Paint it or just add a more contemporary shelving look. Light fixture change a must but after painting. Lowes or home depot or clearance at lighting stores are good values. Even go on lighting websites. When selling realtors will tell you to paint everything neutral and keeps things simple. Outdated items the worse but the shelving is good storage. You could add some lighting above and add nice accent pieces.

To tmoose0988 It has been almost a year since you posted your help wanted, photos. Would love to see what you have done. Any new photos you can share with us.