I think the candy bar is a great idea. I've seen them at a formal "grownup" fundraising dinner, and I did one myself when we hosted a holiday party -- people loved it.

Another idea is to think about the next morning...at one party I attended, we were given a small bag of homemade (by a local baker) biscotti on the way out. I was happy to have it the next morning with my coffee!

I don't like favors for weddings or Birthday parties. An unnecessary expense a new couple doesn't need.

I agree on a consumable or nothing. I had actually written a post very similar to Ida's above on your previous thread but got distracted.

How formal is the reception setting?

I gave the sugarfina champagne gummy bears Fun2BeHere mentioned above for a few gifts at Christmas and they were a BIG hit.

I don't like chocolate but I know it is a pretty universal pleaser. I just saw these at Marcie Blaine chocolates the other day-- unfortunately not NYS or fall related but the Philadelphia Love design is iconic for a phila groom!

I posted this on the other thread, then someone suggested starting a new thread for favors:

As a guest I always enjoy getting chocolate as a favor. How about Lake Champlain Truffles? 2 per guest should be plenty:

Truffles

No favors at the last three weddings I've attended which is fine with me.

I think it should be something that can be consumed right then and there -- candy, chocolates, a candy bar, cookies, the little bottles of champagne. Make sure it is something you like and then you can eat whatever is left!

Martha

I liked what my niece did. She put our place name cards in a frame deal that later was just the thing for the pictures we took at the photo booth. That way your guests decide if they want a memory to bring home...How easy would it be to get a NY prop and fall leaf glasses or some fallish prop.

My DD used to work in a candy store and they sold cute little maple sugar candies in the shape of maple leaves - two to a box. Not sure what they'd cost, but probably not much.

We are thinking of matches for my DD's. Rarely do you see them out anymore and they are nice to have around. "A Perfect Match" and many other things to get printed on them. We thought we would have them scattered on the tables (and ours will have only a couple of kids.)

I once went to a wedding where the lavender chocolate favors had melted in the hot sun.

Back when I got married in 99, we got wire puzzles from Oriental Trading Company, and tied a tag with a bit of wedding themed doggerel ("two pieces distinct become tightly linked..."). The great thing about the puzzles was watching all the guest trade them amongst themselves after dinner. It was a nice conversation starter.

We did small bottles of wine with personalized labels but this was before the 3 oz. liquid rules on airplanes. They were a good price.

I like chocolates, or else you really don't have to do anything.

"Matches"--this came to mind when the thread began--back in the day, long before my time--so WAAAAY back didn't EVERYONE get wedding matches? My point being, favors aren't NEW they have just swung back around.

yes, arcy! Here it was always candied almonds in a little mesh bag.

I still have a pack of matches from my wedding, embossed with our names and date, from 44 years ago. Of course, back then, many people smoked.

I'm a "no favor" vote as well. I don't expect favors, and I don't need trinkets or anything more to eat (most snack type favors I wouldn't eat). I don't even need to hear that someone made a donation to a good cause in lieu of favors. Do favors if you really want to, but don't do feel like you have to do it because it's expected.

I vote for a little food item. A nibbly they can enjoy right there or when they retire from the festivities.

No tchotchke to schlep home.

At my nephew's wedding they had beautiful little beaded Indian boxes (bride is Indian) with a couple of grocery store chocolates, like hershey's kisses, in them. The boxes were very much nicer than any you can get in this country, and they had them stacked on a table in the entry/exit at the reception so people could grab one as they left.

At the end of the night most people had left the boxes behind and just taken the chocolates.

I love Sue's suggestion of biscotti.. but I am not so much into sweets so that's part of the appeal.

To go with a fall wedding, I have always thought these mini whoppie pies were darling. I have sent them as gifts a number of times (sold by Williams-Sonoma when in season). I wouldn't want to bother to make them myself right before a wedding but they do sell the little molds so perhaps you could have a local bakery make them for you.

If anything, cookies or candy or something edible. A fair percentage of the guests will not even take the favor. People forget about them. It's good if the abandoned favors can still be consumed even if by the waiters!

I do like the idea of leaving a little Welcome bag at the hotels for out of town guests. I presume you have reserved a block of rooms for guests. I enjoyed having little nibbles and a list of things to see and do with maps in my hotel room at the last out of town wedding.

My niece had a mesh bag of goodies at each place setting. It was a rather casual wedding (frankly, one of the worst I've ever attended, but that is another story). The water glasses sweated onto the table and the goodies in the bags got soaked.

I hope this doesn't come across as snarky as I fear it may. Please know that's not my intent, but I can't wrap my head around the concept that wedding favors are "expected." Do you all really think that people who would attend a wedding out of love and happiness for the couple would "expect" some little bite of candy or trinket or something to take home with them, like a child attending a children's birthday party?

OK, that does come across as a little snarky, but who is saying this is "expected"? It doesn't strike me as something the OP is just wildly in favor of doing, but is amenable to it because it's "expected". I can't recall even noticing favors at weddings I've attended -- that's how far off my radar something like this is.

I'll go crawl back into my out-of-touch hole now. ;-)

IdaClaire- I feel the same way about goody bags for traveling guests. I was pretty much brow beaten into making these things to give to our guests at our rehearsal dinner.

It's nice, but far from obligatory.

I do however really like the idea of a little personalized favor.

Haha....you gave me a chuckle!

I agree. But, I would not look at a cute box of mimi cookies or two gourmet chocolates and say, 'My goodness, what were they thinking!"

It's a nice touch when it's there, but I agree, it would not be something I would be looking for and expecting. And worse, think somehow the couple was lacking because I didn't get a favor.

Well, it could also be that customs and "expectations" vary by region. What may seem odd to me may be perfectly normal for others. YMMV.

Well actually, yes. Go to a Catholic-Italian wedding and you'll probably see a little bag of Jordan almonds waiting at your place setting ;-)

Yes, there are definitely regional expectations and family customs for weddings. And that should be taken into consideration when you give advice or criticize :) Viennese table anyone?

Yes, please!

I agree with Ida, I don't think a takeaway is necessary or expected, hell, I never even did them for my DD's birthday parties. and no one ostracized her from the elementary school pecking order. I also agree with d_gw about regional expectations, for instance, I had never heard of a Viennese table before, had to google it and I've never been to a wedding with one.

My sister had sweet bookmarks made. We added silk tassels to them. They're laminated & feature an illustrated poem that is meaningful to the bride & groom, along w/ their names & the date. They were placed @ every setting @ the reception. My cousin's wedding had beautiful little boxes containing a few gourmet chocolates @ the reception place settings

We go to many weddings. I can not remember the last time that there was not a favor of some sort.

We've been given candy, cookies, a pretty sea shell, a brass dog (different breeds available so you could pick your favorite?), a CD with 8 songs special to the couple (probably not paid for music, but good songs), a small picture frame place card

Nothing is expected it's just done that way here.

edited to add: I think favors at weddings started when the custom of 'sending home a piece of wedding cake to dream on' lost favor.

I'm trying to remember if I've ever rec'd a favor at a wedding. I honestly don't remember ever receiving one. I'm another who would vote no favors or do a couple of chocolates.

OP here. You guys are great, giving me lots of different perspectives and voices of experience. I really appreciate it.

I don't believe that any of our guests would ever "expect" to receive a wedding favor. I was just commenting that wedding favors didn't exist in my realm when I was a bride 30 years ago. All we want to do is to make our guests feel extra special for the day. And if there is a new (to me!) practice of giving a little something extra at the end, then I can readily get behind it. I think it is a fun, those certainly not necessary, way to pamper our guests.

I like the idea of giving something up front, and to make it part of the guest's place setting, vs. having a table to take something from at the end.

True story. DH and I were at a wedding at the Jersey shore. Great wedding!

One of the family owns a sub shop, and the couple had him bring subs for the guest to take as they left. They set up a table by the main door.

We left through another door! Oh no!

DH and I love his subs and I was so bummed that I missed it ;-(

I'm a fellow New Yorker... how about a caramel apple or candy apple wrapped in cellophane with a small tag and bow. You can place these apples on the table at the place setting or at a table near an exit door for the end of the night! Best wishes for a wonderful wedding and a lifetime of happiness!

I've never been to a Catholic or Italian wedding, but I always hope for that bag of Jordan almonds!

We attended four weddings last year-one in California, one in Maine and two in Texas. All brides/grooms were in their late twenties or early thirties. None had favors, and all were very elegant church weddings with sit-down dinners afterward. It made me wonder if the favor thing was passing. If you truly want to do one, I think the idea of one or two beautiful chocolates is perfect.

Fori is not pleased

I've never been to a Catholic or Italian wedding, but I always hope for that bag of Jordan almonds!

*****

Sometimes I sneak a little bag into my purchases at Home Goods, if they're sitting there staring at me at checkout!

Being of an age of 50+, which it seems, many of your attendees will be, I strongly recommend NO little anythings that they will have to tote home or discard. We've attended many weddings over the yesrs and gift bags for guests are/were never handed out. And, we never felt deprived. If this is common in your area, though, I heartily recommend edible gift bags.

BTW, when our darling niece was married a few years ago, she'd set up a help-yourself-old-fashioned candy bar for guests. At first, we all chuckled at it, pretty as it was, but in the end, it was a HUGE hit with everyone, regardless of age. We all has such fun picking out our childhood favorites. All these years later, that still stands out in everyones' minds when we recall our favorite wedding receptions.

I just remembered another favor from a friends wedding many years ago - it was a small decorated mason jar containing a flowering bulb to grow (wedding theme was flowers & butterflies)

I dont care for favors at all. Clutter and unnecessary but I may do it for dd's wedding this July, if she really wants them. Only one out of very many weddings had a favor on the table. A bit of candy.

If you're interested in chocolates from the Hudson Valley, check out the Alp's Sweet Shop in Beacon and Fishkill. They've been making chocolate since 1922. I grew up on it and have been told that it's as good as ever. On their website they have a wedding favor section and do custom orders. Maybe they have a mold of a maple leaf.

Grew up in Jersey, live in NY. I can not remember ever attending a wedding that did NOT have favors. In fact, there was an argument at my first wedding about the favors. a story for another day! :) I love the idea of something local if you are going to do them. Candy apples is a lovely idea from a local apple farm, or many places have spice packets (soup, dip etc) or small wine bottles, candy, etc from a local place. Honey I bet would be yummy too. I am sure there are tons of local choices.

are your guests mostly local to the venue, or from farther away?

I'm also from upstate NY and my first thoughts were candied/caramel apples or mini pumpkins. :) I don't think of maple for NY. Wine is obvious too, since it's the Finger Lakes region -- my niece gave favors of small bottles of wine with a custom label made for the couple. Honey is good idea... one wedding I attended last year gave out honey dippers as favors. It might be frowned upon, but I'd bet my guy friends would love cigars as favors. ;^)

I don't think of maple for NY.

Tsk. The area around Franklin NY makes maple syrup every bit as good as any from Vermont.

I like the local honey idea, though, if you could get small enough bottles. I wouldn't want to have to decant a big bottle into little jars.

I just remember having gotten tea as a party favour, it was in a cylinder that had a label printed out with the wedding details, I kept those forever and used the tea occasionally, who doesn't like tea.

I grew up outside of Syracuse. Yes, NY has good syrup but I think that the maple leaf is generally associated with Canada and syrup with Vermont. I agree that apples are more of an upstate symbol.

Edited to add - IMO, A nicely wrapped cider donut to eat the next morning would be a perfect favor for an upstate NY fall wedding!

Along the Hudson it's all maple trees, hence the fall color. My sister sent me a bottle of Crown maple syrup from Dutchess County. It was so good. Never had NY honey but a red candy apple would be a great nostalgic treat (but sticky!).

https://www.crownmaple.com/about-crown-maple

You all have given me such great ideas! I want to go to a wedding with each of these favors.

To answer a question, most of our guests will be coming from either New York City, Philly, or Connecticut. Some will be from upstate New York, but most will be from out of town. A lot are either 50 or older, so I'm thinking we might not want to do candy apples (even though I love them.) definitely leaning towards a food item, perhaps syrup, or maybe maple candies. Still exploring. The only other thing to keep in mind is that our menu includes a "pastry delight "table at the end of the wedding with a beautiful assortment of fancy little pastries. Wondering if we need anything as far as favors…

I don't think you need favors particularly. I don't think anyone would miss them.

My mom made homemade blueberry jam for our wedding favors -- canned it in the tiny 4 oz quilted canning jars. We decorated the lid with a piece of gingham and a ribbon. People seemed to like it -- or at least no one left theirs behind.

That's the best kind of favor! If I could do that, I would give something homemade.

Nice to have the jar after, too.