I guess it depends upon what you do in your kitchen! First for me is function, appliances, layout, faucets, lighting - but I love to cook.

Thanks powermuffin! So I should specify where we are in our remodel. We have a layout, and have ordered cabinets and the granite. So with those things being established, I'm just trying to figure out the aesthetics of this space, picking out backsplash, lighting, hardware, stools for the island and the faucet. I also love to cook :-) So I do not want to compromise functionality for form, but I know they are not mutually exclusive either.

@beckysharp That kitchen you posted is revelatory. I'm stunned.

For me, the lighting has a huge impact on how a kitchen looks. And appliances - it is rare that they should be anything other than stainless.

I agree with what Becky said -- you can get your "good" stuff if you work at it. There is a difference in quality and I like "quality" . . . it IS worth the money but you can get that quality at cheap prices if you troll eBay and craigs list, etc. If the pendants for over the island that I like the best are $1000 and I can't afford $3000 for them rather than settling for something cheap that looks like them I would rather find something similar that originally was that same $1000 but is on eBay perhaps for $300.

@beckysharp, Thank you!

I do have a direction I'd like to follow. Trying to balance period appropriateness with modern amenities. We would love fireclay ceramic tile for the backsplash, Kohler Artifacts for the faucet, Feiss Cadence lighting. My must-haves were the Kraftmaid cabinets (fell in love with the Hamilton door). Really wanted the double panel shaker and lots of drawers, and a coffee station hutch. So those were my must haves. Everything else really boils down to budget. I love the items I listed, but I also really like some other comparable things, so that's why I am lost. I don't know where to splurge, where to save my money, etc.

@Anglophilia, Thanks! I agree about lighting. We will have recessed lighting but pendants, or maybe linear chandelier over the island where the sink will be. I worry if I get a faucet with a lot going on, and statement lighting, that they will compete with one another. I forgot to mention that we do have our appliances already, and they are all stainless, but the d/w. I decided to keep the d/w because it is pretty new, and it works great. I've seen quite a few people who end up with dishwashers that quit, or don't work properly, so I figured I would just stick with what works for now, and maybe look into contacting GE to see if I could buy a SS panel for it.

I agree with Anglophilia, lighting is a worthy splurge, both in quality and abundance. I also splurged on adding in a window seat. For me, it was on my wish list since I was young, and knew I had to have it, even if it meant making sacrifices elsewhere.

I think aside from the biggies you already have (quality cabinetry, good design and good appliances) the rest is totally based on individual, personal preferences.

That's so funny rebeccamommyof123! I've also always wanted a window seat, but in our case it was more cost effective to add one than to raise up the window it's going beneath. If I could bother you, what is the name of your granite, and do you have any pictures of your lighting? That window seat is so inviting by the way!

I love the items I listed, but I also really like some other comparable things, so that's why I am lost.

The way forward, I'd think, would be to figure out how much you can spend, and then rank the importance to you of particular backsplash tiles, faucet, light fixtures, stools, window treatments, hardware, etc.

You can also make a list in order of the things you'll definitely need as you complete the remodel -- you certainly need a faucet, lights, hardware, and so on, but you might not need window treatments right away and you definitely don't need backsplash tiles right away. Not only will waiting give you the chance to save up again, but seeing some of the earlier choices in your new kitchen might help inform your later decisions.

Another way to save, for certain items like lighting, is by buying a budget version now as a "placeholder" to be replaced with a splurge version down the road.

I think for some people and some items, there's just a pull toward a certain light fixture or tile that you've had your heart set on. In other instances, you don't know until you see it, and in still other instances, you're happy with any of several choices and you can let the budget do the deciding. Start with the items you're unwilling to compromise on, and then work your way "down" : ) .

The Smiths, that's great, you will be so glad you did it! My granite is White Ice. I'll have to see what I can dig up for lighting pics. I know they are in my reveal post. I'll look and update you.

Found a few, from when we first completed reno. Sink light:

Pendants/can lighting:

We also have under cab lighting and tons of windows for natural light.

I love fireclay tile. Our last kitchen we were in the SF Bay Area and I also love Heath. We went to the seconds and overstock room at Heath and got our backsplash tile for around $7 a square foot--less than half retail price. Fireclay has a similar place in San Jose, I think. If you are in the Bay Area, it might be worth a trip for you to see if you can find something you love at a bargain price. I think if you search on the kitchen forum you will find suggestions for less expensive alternatives to consider as well. You could also post the tile you want here and/or on kitchens and get suggestions for other options.

On the faucet, if you aren't deadset on a particular finish, polished chrome is often much cheaper than other finishes and it is also quite durable.

For me it's considering what is easily upgraded, to not changing for 30 years. So I'd go cheap on lights if needed- but not on the counter or cabinets.

Thank you so much to everybody, excellent advice. @rebeccamomof123, I think we have very similar taste! Love your kitchen!

Along the lines of what Renee stated, also consider what has to be purchased right now or what might be able to wait. It may be worth waiting a couple of months to purchase the stools or window treatments that you want, in order to have more money available.

Define "high end look" ... what does that mean in your area, and to you? Define the function and appearance you want, without specifying brand names. After you have defined the look, you can start selecting.

IMPORTANT: Nothing says "high end" like precise workmanship, a functional layout and decor that "fits together". Sloppy installations can make $5,000 of backsplash tile look like a cheap hamburger joint's bathroom. And too much bling and colors that don't quite match look like you just couldn't make it happen.

I do "satisficing" ... http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Satisficing

Lay out the specifications for the purchase and note which ones are
true requirements and which are "nice to have". Dimensions and budget
are usually hard requirements. "Looks" is usually less rigid, unless
you are matching things.

Then start searching for products that can fill the REQUIREMENTS ...
if you need a 36" range to fit the kitchen, don't waste time looking at
anything that is wider ... just DO NOT LOOK at the 48" Wolf! If your
budget for tile is $8/sq ft ... don't look at the $20/Sq Ft stuff.

I then arrange them in ascending price order and start with the
lowest price stuff and go up the price scale. When I find a product
that fits the specifications, I STOP LOOKING.

EXAMPLE 1: I had a list of 20 or so tile stores, prepared to shop for
a tile to blend with existing bath floor tile for a tub upgrade. In
the FIRST place I stopped, I found tile that blended beautifully, was on
the low end of my budget (it was CHEAP!) and came in the size I needed
... it was about 95% of my ideal. I bought it and dumped the list into
the trash. Somewhere out there might have been a tile that would have
been 96-99.99% but it's not worth the time trying to get from really
good to perfect.

EXAMPLE 2: We wanted to replace ceiling fans with something vaguely
"period" (for a house that was built before electricity) ... made the
list of specs: number of blades, LED light kit, adaptable to a remote,
and dark metal finish and "craftsman" or "rustic", down-facing light
shades.

Many Internet searches later ... we had a couple dozen fans on a
list. Eliminating the ones that had moose or trees on them (too much
like a Cabela's display) ... started up the list and #2 looked
reasonably styled for the house's era. So I bought 4 of them.

@lazy_gardens, fantastic advice, thank you!

Very interesting. I hadn't come across satisficing before.

It applies excellently to my first (almost always) thought when budget is a consideration. You have your appliances, but others don't.

Whenever possible, buy high-end used at tremendous discounts and put the money into other items that can't just be rolled out to roll replacements in. Virtually all appliances will have lost their cache well within 5 years and like cars start depreciating immediately. And their prices are really pumped up these days.

A perfect opportunity to satisfice by investing money saved in special splurging, for instance, moving the doors and plumbing so that the layout will always please or in higher-quality, uncommon tile/counter/flooring that won't still be seen everywhere long after the more common stuff has become ho-hum.

One thing I would recommend as not worth it is expensive faucets, at least in my experience. Our house came with a very pricey and beautiful faucet when we bought it. But it started to leak, parts were hard to get, and in addition, the hard water in our area permanently discolored the finish (chrome, which holds up the best but still gets splotchy over time). So even though it was only maybe 5 years old, we ended up replacing it with a Home Depot cheapo. That one lasted maybe 4 years and we replaced it again (it was junky -- literally we bought it for the style and because we needed something ASAP since the old faucet had completely bit the dust) with something mid-range from an unknown brand from Overstock. That faucet has hung in there now for like 10 years...yes, it's discolored in places from the hard water, but until it starts to leak or have an issue, it's staying.

We recently remodeled our bathroom and I was amazed at the price difference in faucets -- I fell in love with a beautiful Rohl faucet that would have cost us about $1000/sink. Got an almost identical look from Delta for $200/sink. And I know that in 5 years, they'll both be equally discolored from the water....and at that point, I won't feel bad if I decide to replace the Deltas but I sure would feel obligated to keep and fix the Rohls.

So I would stick with a Delta or a Moen -- both have lifetime warranties and both manufacturers have good parts availability even for faucets that are 20 years old. And they won't break your budget. Just my 2 cents.

Thanks lkplatow! Very interesting. When we moved into this house 5 years ago we needed a new faucet, so I grabbed one of the cheapest ones at HD knowing we would be remodeling eventually. I got a no name $30 faucet that was on special and have had zero problems with it. Makes you wonder, right? My friend has a nicer kitchen, and she's already gone through several. I will definitely be sure whatever brand I choose has a good warranty. At the moment my favorite faucets are Delta, Moen, Kohler and one Elkay. I may nix the Elkay if it's warranty doesn't stand up to the others.

lazy_gardens THANK YOU! GREAT purchasing advice! So key is to spend more time / thought in the front end and get specs right, get all parties to agree, then find it, get approval and buy it! If approval fails, a spec needs updating.

I decided to check the sears outlet and the best buy outlet. I got my ideal appliances for about half price and they were all brand new never been used one had been store displayed, one was an open box, and the stove had a small scratch on the side which will never be seen with it in place and was barely noticeable to begin with. The guy at sears was great, since we bought a few things there he gave us a big discount plus when they found out that we were flood victims they did even better. Never hesitate to ask for a best price. I am thrilled with all of my appliances they were exactly the ones I wanted but never thought I could afford because of the flood expense. Check out those outlets!

I agree 100% with satisficing!

We always went to the habitat restore store first to see if they might have what we needed before going shopping elsewhere. That paid off hugely in tile. We found the perfect tile for the guest bathroom for 70c sqft, porcelain tile name brand that we had seen at the tile store for so much more. We bought all the new outlet plates and switches there for a few dollars for a bag full. Door handles, sets of lever handles in the brushed nickel for $3 a set good brand. I can't even tell you how much we saved there. Very few things we bought were used most was brand new. I know not every store is the same. We had to have a strict budget because we had the fema insurance money to work with and there was zero paid for our contents just structure. If you make your self be disciplined and keep good guidelines it's easier. I have the faucet I wanted, but I got a great deal on it with discount codes. I asked my granite guy to throw in the exact sink I wanted he did.

If shopping Lowe's or home Depot ask to talk to the manager tell them you are going to be buying a major amount of stuff from building material to tile and lighting and electrical etc will they give you a discount on all your purchases if you get it all from them. Lowe's gave us 10 % off of everything plus using our Lowe's card gave us an additional 5% off. It was a huge bonus for us. With out that kind of stuff I would never have been able to have the kitchen I love. And the master bathroom and the other bathrooms etc lol.

Lazy gardens, very interesting. I'd never heard of satisficing. Having read the article, I realize my husband is truly a maximizer and I'm somewhere in between, tending toward the maximizer side. In a new house build, this is exhausting. I do think he's starting to see the need to be willing not to explore every possibility first. We're off to look at lights today. Here's hoping we can be satisficers!

I'd always chuckle when working inside a house that had $1,000 window treatments covering a $169 vinyl window. It should be the opposite.

Also ... make a spreadsheet to track your options, and add up the totals for the various choices to compare with the budget.

Seeing it laid out, and seeing that if you go for the $2/sq ft plain subway backsplash it gives you enough money for that pendant you crave ... or that taking the #3 choice in sinks means you can get the #1 faucet you want.

I did this frequently in landscape design ... putting much of the plant budget into one or two prominently placed "specimen" trees and filling in with bog-standard attractive but not showy material.

That's a great method, lazy_gardens. I did that when planning out my family room. Great way to weigh your options!

oh not_so_lazy_g , you are so succinct! April