I helped SIL give an 80th b’day party for MIL. I did not account for the frailty of some guests. Would it be possible to have a co-hostess/helper who could prepare and deliver each person’s beverage of choice after they are seated? Often the elderly have canes or walkers which impede their carrying dishes and cups while moving about.

I also discovered not to use clear dishes. Many of DMIL’s friends had such poor vision they could not find the stack of plates on the table.

I’m thinking that it won’t be an open house/ drop in but most will come at 3 and stay until 5:00.

It is a short amount of time especially for those traveling an hour and taken into consideration most are older.

(For me, an open house would be an all day affair. )

Are you putting all the food out at the same time?

I agree with bbstx. You might want to think about having so eone helpyou serve and assist.

Your party sounds lovely. Best wishes to your dad.

Why don’t you and your DH and perhaps a friend walk around with trays for passed appetizers? That way you avoid having groups of people congregated in front of the serving table. You really dont need to worry as much about what people are touching as you do what they are breathing. OTOH If they’re going to be hugging each other when they enter you may as well have the buffet and not worry about the mode of serving.

Most invitees are going to be much younger. Only one couple who are neighbors and lifelong friends will be elderly besides my Dad. Although my generation is edging closer to that designation. It would be nice if I had help but I don't. Hubs is going to stay home and babysit his puppy. That's why I went with a small crowd, only 13 invited even if they all show at the same time. But I'm sure some of the younger set will pitch in to help the elders. The weather should be very nice, Indian summer close to 80 degrees. I plan on separating the cake area from the appetizer area from the drinks, although not by a huge distance. Luckily my dad has small folding tables kind of like TV trays that I can place around . . . plus I have TV trays, so that makes quite a few extra little tables to put next to the seats. Plenty of extra chairs too. But I will have to plan for congestion around the food serving area, although I don't think it will get extremely crowded, but it will get crowded by covid protocol standards. Dad has a lot of trouble with hearing people and understanding them when they are wearing masks, which is why I made sure all invitees were vaccinated. But most of these folks will be prudent and not be excessively in each other's faces I think . . .

Dad has an open concept house with the kitchen open to the living area, so that's where most folks will congregate. Some of these folks he sees every day or week so I don't imagine they will stay that long.

I wanted to have the party at my house because I have lots more space and seating areas, like a parlor, family room, dining room and screened in porch and deck. But Dad said no. Four of the attendees live in his subdivision so they can pop out if it gets too crowded and one couple already told me they are coming later in the day. There may even be a couple of no shows. The main attraction for my Dad is this couple and their daughter that are like a second family to my Dad and he hasn't seen them in two years due to the pandemic. She's a doctor, all are vaccinated. They are the ones coming from a distance and will probably stay the longest.

I'm wondering about seating and eating. Are there enough places for people to place a plate & cup on when they're spread out?

Tongs are great for serving yourself, and you could have some disinfecting hand wipes/hand sanitizer on deck too.

Maybe extra masks for anyone who needs or wants one?

Coffee is such a fussy drink to serve, because you need go-withs and spoons. I wonder how many people will drink coffee in late afternoon.

Graywings that was my thought too! But then, I also know that coffee drinkers want their coffee!! That's why I wondered about just one carafe, but couldn't decide how to parse the caffeine vs decaf debate. I could do half/caff but that might be the worst of both worlds . . . or just decaf and caffeine addicts will have to suck it up.

Maybe some disposable handtowels (or paper towels) in the powder room so that not everyone has to share a towel?

I've decided to ax the sweet and sour sausages in the chafing dish and just go with salami. Not because it is going to be any particular trouble, but you do have to have a tea light or something like that under the chafing dish and that's just one thing not needed as a potential anxiety causer. I guess I could do them in the crockpot, my Dad has a small one.

Thankfully Dad already has paper towels in his guest bathroom, but I need to check and make sure there are plenty and the waste basket is empty before the party starts . . . also make sure he has squirt type hand soap and not a bar . . . and I suppose check to make sure the TP roll is not skimpy . . .

To make it easier, I would not serve coffee. There’s no need at this time in the afternoon.

Our older relatives love a sweet punch (Hawaiin punch with 7 Up), mix and pour from a pitcher.

Talked to my Dad and he also didn't think folks would want coffee. But cake and coffee is such a classic. Then Dad said, "Maybe some hot water for tea . . . " So there's tea . . . I am almost thinking about doing just hot water, tea and coffee bags, I actually have those and they are tolerable. I also found a bottle of sparkling pear juice in the back of the fridge and I think this is the perfect occasion to pop the cork on it!! It would be good mixed with the cider.

Dad said, "How about ice cream?" I was avoiding that because serving it is so difficult for an open house . . . but again, like Maddielee said, oldsters love them some sweets!! (Edited to add that I am pretty close to oldster territory myself and am laughing with them not at them, I don't mind being called an "oldster." Plus, seriously who doesn't love sweets and a birthday party!)

I like the idea of having DIY beverages. Flavored unsweetened seltzers are popular in our family.

Most definitely make it as easy on yourself as possible so you can have a good time.

I'm sure whatever you do will be fine because it's all about the people! I do find a lot of people like coffee though but that might just be my circle and if I had two coffee pots I would make one decaf and one regular. I'm one of those who likes Hot drinks but I would be just as happy with a decaf tea bag or nothing, I'm there for the people.

And since you have mentioned it, I do love those Smokies in the jelly sauce. I'd throw them in a crock pot.

Sounds wonderful! Do you or someone have a Keurig for people who might want coffee? That might be an option. Also, keep bottles of santiizer next to where people might touch utensils.

I've also used the Kleenex hand towels when we had people over. So, I would recommend those. They come in an upright box.

For ice cream, you can get the single serving Haagen Dazs cups, if available in your area, or the HD bars in the Costco pack. Since you are having cupcakes, there is no need for the mess/sanitation complexities of a self-serve scooped ice cream.

I might have to look into those cups. I have a serious ice cream problem so can't keep the regular Häagen Dazs pints in the house, I polish it all off quite rapidly.

Just didn't do ice cream because it was an open house buffet kind of deal so couldn't really set it out long term, but individual serving cups would be great to have on hand for all kinds of reasons.

Luckily I polished off the wrap pinwheels for a couple of lunches so it worked out OK. The guacamole did not hold up well but the hummus and spinach dip did . . . the guac ones got real soggy even in the fridge.