Well, there’s a difference in caring for and using marble vs quartz. Marble might not be a great choice for a young, active family. It can stain and/or etch with normal use. But it’s gorgeous, no doubt! Im like your husband- I personally hate quartz and will not ever have it. How about granite? There are many beautiful stone choices and it’s easier care and more durable than marble. I sealed my granite once with a 15 year sealer and it looked perfect 10 years later, having had 3 teens. I’d recommend looking at some granite slabs.

Go wirh marble hands down. I myself was in this predicament recenlty with a kirchen/ bathroom remodel. I never conisdered quartz for the kitchen., we went with marble and have no regret. Honed, gorgeous and love it every day since installed. The bathroom however, we needed solid white color for esthetics, which left us with thassos marble or quartz. It is a teen/ guest bathroom, so quartz seemed the better option I reluctantly chose it. I truthfullt do not get the hyoe over it. It in no way comes close to the look of real stone , and just feels artificial. Mine is suppose to mimilc thassos, solid pure white It is a quartz by Aleanza called Thassos Extra. . However, the first counter installed had black specks all in it that looked like dirt. Fabricator said he would replace it, only ro quickly realize that EVERY quartz manufacturer with solid white all have black specks. Doesn't matter what brand or name, they all have it We looked at every manufacturer and white available for a replacement and they all had the same issue. The replacement was actually installed today and guess what?? black specks. The companies call then ” imperfecrions or contaminations” I have thrown in the towel ar this point and just going to close my eyes when going in there.. We need to close up plumbing and finish this job. i would never get quartz ever again. First and last time. I will be remodeling my master bath and will surely go natural stone. Not a fan of quartz at all. I know I am in the minority, but im not impressed .

Your husband is correct. Quartz…which is made with 33% plastic resins…lacks the depth and beauty of real marble.

As for upkeep with children: Seal the marble, and it will not stain. Etching, however, is inevitable. In reality, etchings usually cannot be seen straight on. They’re usually most visible when the light hits it from a certain angle, or if you look at the counters from a more horizontal (sideways) view. Additionally, after a while, the etches will begin to blend together, and become less noticeable. Marble is a living surface, and gets more beautiful with age.

FYI, beacause quartz slabs are 33% plastic resins, they are suseptible to heat damage. Place the lid from a hot pot onto quartz, and it will leave a distinct mark. Someone posted about this happening to them, just the other day…and, that wasn’t the first time a poster complained about heat damage to their quartz counter. Quartz is not bullet proof, like the industry would like you to believe.

Real always trumps fake plastic stone. Kids in Italy have grown up with carrara marble counters no problem. Wipe up spills when they happen if you must then use a sealer . I like just factory polished real stone

I’ve had all three ( granite, marble & quartz ). My granite ( subtle ) was like new 15 years later when I sold my home. The other two not so much. How OCD are you? My present marble drives me nuts , I see every little flaw, but I realize some people are tolerant of it,

@K Laurence - do you have any pics of what it looks like? I"m also doing the same debate as the OP (who I can't tag for some reason?)

Honed marble. Sealed.

darbuka, I'm curious about your "33% plastic resins" figure. According to everything I've read, quartz countertops are 5% to 7% resign by weight. Even if you measure by volume rather than by weight, quartz countertops are more than 80% stone compared to 16% resin.

We have both in our new bathroom. I would have liked marble for the vanity top aesthetically, but we knew we were not cut out for the maintenance in keeping that free of water stains and etching in a wet setting. We went with a marble-look quartz. We used marble for the shower curb and wall top because it was what was available as a remnant from the stone yard that matched the bathroom. You can definitely tell that one is quartz and one isn't--see side-by-side photo from pre-install--but they are both nice in their own rights. The finish actually isn't all that different. (Marble is honed.) The quartz does have little specks, as noted below--my understanding is that it comes with the territory for manmade stone. I think we lucked out with one that doesn't repeat in a way that you can immediately tell that it's manmade, but that was dumb luck since we bought it sight unseen from a big box store. It was a fraction of the cost of marble, which also factored in (though for about the same price we could have purchased a version of our vanity with a dark gray engineered marble top that just didn't work aesthetically for our space).

In our kitchen, we mixed stone with wood to manage both cost and utility of the different counter materials. We have stone (soapstone in our case) in the wet and hot areas near the sink and stove, and wood in the other counter areas. We do have a marble piece that sits on our island work table for rolling dough, etc.--I love it but it has definitely gotten etched over the years and I'm glad it's not a permanent counter. I'd explore the many options that are neither marble nor quartz if you like the look of stone but don't want the maintenance of marble--there are lots of other options to consider.

"Etching, however, is inevitable."

This is no longer true.

Are you open to something dark like soapstone?

@Alyssa Fernandez, ”Websites say that quartz countertops are a mixture of 93% quartz and 7% resin binder. This is only partially true because these numbers are based on the weight; by volume, the typical ratio is 65% quartz and 35% resin.” That’s a quote from Zsolt Granite Corporation.

Joseph Corlett, the quartz expert on this site, has stated many times, that quartz is 33 1/3% plastic resins, by volume.

There’s way more plastic in quartz counters, than you folks who drank the industry Kool Aid want to believe.

darbuka, thanks for the info. (I'm still a quartz girl, not because of the industry Kool Aid, but because, of all the countertops I've had--and I've had marble, granite, formica and solid surface/Corian--it performed the best. We're not diligent enough about re-sealing, which means our marble and granite ended up with water stains.)

A family of four.......means nothing. I know families of seven with immaculate homes, care and attention to daily maintenance.

I know homes /childless where it appears a bomb went off.

Go look at some quartzite options like Taj Mahal.

Or know that ANY marble will etch. If you can live with it? Great!

There are a million options in tops and their patterns and solids. Quartz, marble, quartzite, soap stone, granite....

Nobody knows how you live, how much maintenance and care you are willing to give a certain thing. There is no miracle top. Every single one has a pro and a con. No different than any other decision in this life: )

The first decision of ANY kitchen is layout, appliances especially as they drive all of layout.

Then the marriage of cabinet finish, flooring and counter tops. Lighting! A backsplash is your absolute LAST decision and best made when tops are in place.

If you want to end in a good place? The best place to begin...............is the beginning: ) and with a great , functional, plan.

Marble requires more care and a different cleaning regimen that quartz. If you intall it just be mindful of the care it will need especially when it comes to staining.

It might be a good idea to get some quotes. I was quoted $11K for quartz and $23K for Danby Imperial marble for my kitchen. Ijen Blue quartzite was in between. For countertops only. Depending on your budget, you may need to let price be your guide.

@Sally T I’m assuming you’re referring to the marble? If so, I can’t send a pic,I’m at my second home now. FYI, I even had a stone refinishing company attempt to remove the etching & re-seal , not a great result. Someone on here suggested honed marble might be the answer IDK. I like the look but never again ( marble )& I’m pretty OCD.

The marble slabs is called white storm.

I am a fabricator. Unless you can accept scratches, stains, and etched areas you don't want marble in a kitchen. The extraordinary beauty of marble is most closely approximated by some of the true quartzite materials (which is why they are so popular even with the cost premium.) YOu are 100% correct that engineered stone lacks the beauty of natural stone but for many people the durability is the most important attribute. IMHO the advertised superiority of engineered stone over the various "granites" is vastly overstated and, in fact, many natural stones are actually superior to "quartz" surface because they are just as stain resistant and far less vulnerable to heat damage.

I’ve been seeing porcelain being used more and more and below is an article regarding its attributes and the pro’s/con’s. https://www.maxspacestoneworks.com/pros-cons-porcelain-countertops/

I am ok with the quartz material and do have options that I will fit, but I do see the difference between quartz and marble in terms of luster. I will look at some granite options just ot make sure I cover all my bases. More than likely we will go with the quartz or granite material on the main kitchen. While I love the marble and luster, I cannot take the chance that it will look terrible come time to sell our home. Can you guys refer me some options? I am doing a dove white with an espresso island. The tile is grey look of marble that does have some espresso undertones in it. I know it's very difficult to find a granite with the look of marble but was hoping you can refer to me a cleaner less busy granite than can be an option for me. Thank you all for your comments.

what kind of quartzite would be similar in appearance to a Danby Marble? THANKS!

The choice to use marble in a kitchen is fraught with hyperbole and half-truths. Yes, marble is a "soft" stone, yes it's composed of dolomite or calcite, which reacts to acids and can etch, yes it can be chipped easier than granite.

However, not all marbles are the same. Danby marble, shown in the photos below, is more dense than some granites and has a very low porosity. It does not stain. You can leave tea, coffee, wine, berries, tomatoes, curry, etc., etc. on it for hours on end, and wipe it up with NO discoloration at all. The Danby below is shown after 9 years of use in a kitchen where it has not been babied, in fact the homeowner's husband takes no care with it (I am the homeowner!). It was sealed once before installation. And it takes no more care than any other material used on a counter top--I wash it with soap and water, and sometimes "Sprayway" cleaner which is actually for windows but contains no ammonia. In fact, on the Vermont Danby website they even promote using Comet with bleach as a cleaner if necessary.

Suburban kitchen · More Info

Suburban kitchen · More Info

So if you can deal with etching and chipping, there's no reason why you can't use marble. If you can't then you shouldn't.

Ill take etch / chip any day. I use quartz , have clients who love it .

Any top , any material is but one element in a kitchen . One :)

Marble is a tradeoff - better aesthetics, somewhat higher maintenance. But the advantages of quartz are often overstated. There are many threads on here about quartz staining, chipping, and etching.

We also have a family of 4, and I rent our home on airbnb every summer when we travel and I do nothing to my marble and it looks great. yes there are some scratches, small dents by the sink and 8 years in I wouldn't change a thing. I don't know why everyone wants everything to look the same forever. I don't mind that my home looks like I live here... I can already tell that you won't regret it, and that you will always hate your quartz.

Look at quartzite.

@Sally T No quartzite looks like marble. Nothing is as pretty as honed marble, IMO. If you can live with the etching, minor scratches and chipping, then get what you love. Dolomites are the next best thing....a bit more durable regarding scratching and chipping. None of them will stain with proper sealing but they all etch.

These threads on this topic do make me crazy! It's akin to asking whom shall I marry? You marry the man or woman you can live with for a long time. You don't marry with the thought you will change that person in any way. He or she will have flaws evident and not evident. You hold your nose, and jump in, or you keep looking for Mr. or Ms PERFECT.

There's only one guarantee with that plan. You will NOT find that person, and you will realize this after a very long and exhaustive search, sealed by a long gaze into your mirror: )

As dad used to say? "Find the ugly, rainy Sunday guy. The one you can stand on ugly rainy Sundays, because there are a LOT of ugly rainy Sundays".

Cheri127, I’m thinking you meant quartz, yes?

Yes, she means quartz/ by Corian...... not the original Dupont Corian.

Also.........: )If I may repeat myself.

"As dad used to say? "Find the ugly, rainy Sunday guy. The one you can stand on ugly rainy Sundays, because there are a LOT of ugly rainy Sundays".

He/I left out the part that explains if you screw this up? You will find yourself thinking every single day is a rainy ugly Sunday.

Little heads up there : ) and just sayin ....lol

Actually I meant quartzite. It's gorgeous but I don't think any of them really look like marble. Honed quartzite loses most of it's beauty IMO where as marble doesn't. Just my take.

I couldn't agree more with Jan. There are pros and cons to all counters. You have to pick the one you both love and can live with (at least until you can afford a divorce....LOL).