Yes, I asked for advice on how to arrange furniture in my living room which has real design challenges primarily due to its being a room you have to walk through to get to the family room. This is very limiting and I tried to explain the set up giving exact dimensions and including photos. Comments were polite but many of them ignored the central issue and suggestions were made which clearly wouldn't work. I was also told to get rid of the wood that we use from October to April in our fireplace wood-burning stove insert. (We have the wood-burning stove for a reason.)

As a responder who occasionally offers a modest suggestion or two, I have been taken aback by the insensitivity displayed in some of the other comments. If a person says they don't have money for a major renovation, then don't tell them to start by tearing down walls or putting in hardwood floors.

I don't know who the "average' HOUZZ user is, but I am a person who lives modestly and whose goal is not to impress others but who occasionally wants to add or change some things to live more happily in my space. I don't live in a show home; I live in a real home.

"Yes, I also didn't get many responses. What's the secret?"

Ask better questions:

1 - Be very specific about what the problem is, especially in the title.
"Help me make this look better" is less likely to get looked at than "playroom and guest room - how to get both?"

Explain the situation: "this room needs to be a playroom and guest room ... children are 3 and 5, we have guests every month that stay for several days. How can they co-exist?"

a floor plan with measurements is often needed.

Point out what you like in the situation as well as what you don't like, what you want to keep if possible ... knowing what bothers you is good, but I've seen requests for help where the first several suggestions were shot down by the asker because they altered the parts they liked.

2 - Be very specific about your skill level, time constraints, and budget.

Yes, some people will ignore that data and answer a problem you don't have, others have never seen a problem that can't be fixed by their product, and some will automatically recommend you gut but if you just want a quick "fluff" on your living room, say so. If you have the budget for refurnishing, say so.

3 - Post several well-lit well-focused pictures that show the problem area and the surrounding area (overview and closeups). If it's a landscape or house problem, show the house from across the street as well as from the front sidewalk, and views from front door looking out.

If it's a room problem, show as much as possible.

4 - ANSWER ALL REQUESTS FOR MORE INFORMATION!!!!!! We've all seen discussions falter because the origin al question was unanswerable and the OP never bothered to answer further questions from people trying to clarify the problem.

Yes! I posted a question with pictures when I bought my new home a year ago. I didn't know what to do with the living room as it had 2 big, dumb pillars in the way. I received so many great responses and it helped me tremendously. We have bought and sold houses for years and I have always gotten such great compliments on my interior design but, for whatever reason, I could not see my way through this living room. It looks perfect now and one particular comment made all of the difference. She said essentially "ignore the pillars and do what you want to do". Someone else said my original way of arranging the furniture looked like a waiting room. LOL! They were right! I completely enjoyed the experience! Thanks to everyone!

I have posted a decorating dilemma several times. Have received feedback but unfortunately, none of it worked for me. I will continue to post dilemmas but I do have to say, I wish there were more "expert" advisors to respond to my questions. I don't think I asked questions that were overly challenging, assuming there are experienced DIY decorators and professional decorators on this site.

Food for thought for the "Pros", words like bizarre, SAVE, take a pill and get rid of, are probably not "PROFESSIONAL" words and best kept to yourself. When you figure out a way to give advice in a "PROFESSIONAL" way, then comment. Oh and one of my favorites was Sina, who told me GET RID OF THOSE WOOD COUNTERS (people think they're an E. coli trap) Does she know where E. coli comes from? Trust me there's none on my counters! But what I did find FUNNY is on my stroll around Houzz, I found a post from Sina Fattizzo (who I believe was a real estate agent) and the dilemma she had was she purchased furniture and it is way too big for her space. Well, I guess Sina doesn't own a tape measure. lol I would figure a "real estate agent" might know a little more about size and space, no? But I have to say as mean as this may seem, I enjoyed (a bit :) ) that a houzzer really gave it to them if you know what I mean. At least I felt that way for a second. Then I just felt sorry for them and made a nice comment about their room and furniture. Because I'm sure it's not fun being on the receiving end. I know from experience. Hopefully in the future the "PROS" will think of this. Happy thoughts! :)

Who were you addressing your comment to, zazfuzzroc? It has nothing to do with what I said, which is why I'm asking. You mention the word, professional so it seemed that you were offering a follow up comment to mine.

@margaretdeepierce, NO, not at all to you. So sorry if you thought so. It was just in general at some of the pros that were on my post and many others I have read. I think there are much nicer ways of saying things than what I have witnessed, that's all. :) I would never want to make someone feel bad. That's just how I am. Not towards you at all. I made the first comment on this post, go take a look, you may understand why I made this comment. :) Again sorry if you thought this was towards you. It was definitely not. :)

I have thought of posting dilemmas but have not had a situation I could not research and tackle myself. I think for me it works better for someone in person to collaborate with me. Also I find so many helpful posts already on houzz that have been a great resource for me.

Yes I have. Got some comments on the first one that helped me develop a plan for my bathroom. Posted some after pics - received no comments. Posted a 2nd - no comments. I offer comments sometimes but do hesitate because some people attack you personally if they don't agree with your comments. Also, can't stand the posts that seem to stay active and have thousands of comments. They need to end sooner or later. It is annoying to see them constantly. If you start another question, please start a new post.

Some comment threads turn into a friendly neighborhood bar as opposed to a strict design dilemma which I think is OK because some people make connections that go beyond "what color looks best with this tile." You can unsubscribe to those...like the guy who needed to find a table. That went on for months! But good for him, and for the people who were helping him. They enjoyed each other!

Good advice tsudhom above. The big thing I see is lack of clarity in the question. What is the dilemma? What do you need help with? Also dilemmas without photos. People have to start guessing.

Good luck everybody!

Just posted one a few days ago for input and finishing touches. I have one wall left that I'm not sure what to do with. I had a comment about moving the furniture and that was it. I do love reading and getting ideas from the other posts! I love the ones that you can watch the transformation as the room progresses!

Posted twice and got good answers both times. Helped me make a decision. Thanks, Houzz

I have posted one time with little response. I do think this is a great forum for obtaining design advice, whether pro or not. Guess I shouldn't be so specific.

Yes I have several times and have received a response 80% of the time.

Posted once and only got a half dozen responses. Guess my "dilemma" wasn't exciting enough for Houzzers. I haven't posted since.

There are a lot of factors that go into getting the most response possible for your design dilemma.

1. Have a clear and catchy title
2. Explain the dilemma concisely but give plenty of information about what you are trying to achieve.
3. Include clear photos of the space to give people a starting point in helping you work out a plan.
4. The time you are posting is also important. If you happen to post when not a lot of people are active, or if your dilemma peters out with only a couple responses, go back and answer those folks that have taken the time to respond and your post will jump back up to the top of the active discussions, so more people can see it.

We were getting ready to paint the exterior of our house and I simply asked if we should stay with the same color or try something new, and whether we should paint the garage doors the trim color or the house color. I got a few helpful responses, but a couple others who said my shutters were too small and I should remove them or buy bigger ones that are functional. Hmm, don't remember asking for advice on my shutters. Anyway, I find that people love to pick apart other people's houses. In spite of that, it's fun to post and I will probably do it again.

Yes I have posted a design dilemma and greatly appreciated the honest feedback. It was on a light fixture for my kitchen and several comments pointed out features I had not thought about. It was nice to read all the different opinions.

Yes! I did about 2 yrs ago. Just reviewed it and Emily Hurley was first to comment! I see there were a lot of questions asked that I didn't answer I also could have "liked" the comments. and could still show a picture of the after or at least the progress. I got good help and still have the pictures suggested in ideabooks that I never would have found w/o their help. So thanks Emily and others who took the time. I hope to do another soon.

I have two very long dilemma threads here. One was a "help me pick out fabric/colors for chairs/couch" in my living room. It was fantastic, very helpful, and I stuck with it throughout the entire process to the finished product. Love what I got, and made great "friends".

Another is still very long/active about a much bigger project...a carriage house. Exterior and interior qq's galore! Like the LR, I couldn't have done this without the dilemma thread!

My secret to getting great advice and good support?

Start small and gain friendships before you try a huge dilemma.
Don't be shy.
Be willing to put yourself out there.
Comment on others' dilemmas.
Don't withhold info pertinent to the dilemma.
Answer all qq's clearly and honestly.
Check on it often, and respond to comments as quickly as possible.
Bump it if you need to get eyes on it.
Catchy titles are helpful! And cover photos.
Be honest.
Let your personality show through, and be kind to folks.
Take the perspective that comments are posted for a reason. Figure out the reason. Or ask.
Thank them, and then give them something to work with.
Tell them your parameters--budget, what has to stay, what you expect them to help with, etc. Post progress pictures.
Lots of good pictures. :)
Have a very thick skin for truly negative comments. Blow it off. Ignore if you can.
Acknowledge even the negative comments kindly, then move on. Quickly.
Find people you like/value/trust/admire and comment/help with THEIR dilemmas first.
Make friends and help each other out!
Have fun. But keep the project discussion going too.
Take your time, but don't abandon the thread either.
Be realistic. You get what you pay for when you post a dilemma. :)
Don't expect miracles. But shout about it if it happens! THANK PEOPLE!

If a dilemma gets little response, and patience and bumping don't work, try to reword the title, repost and follow above advice.

Hope this helps those of you who are leery, shy or have had unsatisfactory results with dilemmas.

One other thing I've noticed worth mentioning here. The comments where obviously someone hasn't read the thread (happens a lot with long threads!)...they are seeing only the original dilemma info and respond without realizing there is a long discussion already taking place. I try to realize that and gently point out to read the thread that has been going for some time. Generally these commentors feel intrusive, and apologize. Sometimes they get hooked in! See it as a fresh set of eyes.

As a dilemma poster, try to give everyone, especially those new to a discussion, the benefit of the doubt. And, conversely, as a commentor, you should bother to read a thread, at least get the gist of it, before making a comment.

@Rred, I definitely have to work on, "the responding to negative comments kindly." LOL ;) You saved me a few times and for this, I thank you. :) I think differently though. I guess I feel that I'm nice and everyone else should be too. Why should I have to have thick skin? Say it nicely, or move on to the nearest dilemma. Know that this is NOT towards you Rred. It's just my opinion, but you know what I mean, right? I know, I just have to deal with the cr@p. But that's getting old, fast! Well, like Emily pointed out, just report it. :) lol

Yes I have, and never again. Although some were helpful, commenters were harsh and made unrealistic comments like: tear it down and rebuild.

@crickhollowmd, sorry you had an experience like that. Keep your head up! :)

I have asked advise as to what to do with the cut out spaces above the fireplace. Paint? Cover with brick, stone, or dry wall? Redo what's displayed? I'm still waiting for suggestions.

Just SEO tricks, oops! I'm tricked, too!

I have only ever asked one question. It was about the height of a couple of pictures over a 67" high tiled fireplace/TV unit. The first responder used the phrase "if you have to stick with what you've got" and then proceeded to suggest other pictures, and then gave advice that didn't make any sense about moving things to the left and to the right. No suggestion was made about the height of the pictures.
The second responder gave me the stock answer of hanging a picture at the "60 inch height" which I think has been covered over and over on Houzz. That I know. What I wanted to know was the height of a picture over a "67 inch" built in unit. My last post was clarifying this and I never heard another word from either responder.
This section is titled "Design Dilemna" not "Stock Answers to Design 101 Questions."
Other than that, I love looking at all the wonderful pictures on Houzz.

Yes, I've posted a bunch and my house looks much better because of them. I get lots and lots of responses but I stay very active with my threads and that seems to keep them going. Good to post lots of clear pictures and show pics of the changes you make. If you post a dilemma and go away for a day or so, the dilemma will quickly die. Also, prepare to have your feelings hurt along the way to progress:)

I have asked for advice a few times. Each time I got a few responses. I feel everyone was nice and had some good suggestions. I will continue to post when I have a design question.

Yes I have and the responses were great and helpful. I was trying to pick the right rug for my living room.

Then I decided to do a poll and that response was the best. On FB and on site.

Yes there were some rude responses, mostly from FB users, but for the most part it was a great experience.

By the way I finally found the perfect rug. So YAY!

I have yet to post a "dilemma" 'cause I rely on the PHOTO GALLERY collections and so far the "dilemmas" have encountered have all been resolved after spending some spare time looking at the different ways others have addressed similar situations...I have designed a couple of kitchens, bath remodels and even designed garage doors that "fit" with the style of our home... the photos are a great resource.

I've been on Houzz for about 6 months and have posted one dilemma. I received some very helpful feedback and lamp education from kennedytarheel which I implemented. I doubt that I will post further questions though; you need to have pretty thick skin to read some of the 'helpful advice' offered by some. I've learned a lot reading about design reading the posts, especially from groveraxle and LB interiors who are always helpful and supportive to those who post.

I always love the dilemmas that have "HELP!!!!!!" in the subject line...that's it, then the meat of the post is about what shower curtain to use.

I think all caps & a ton of apostrophes should relate to something of an urgency.

Just sayin.....

Mccullb, it's true you need pretty thick skin, but it gets easier and easier with each one. I've done so many now and they really are a huge help. Sometimes I even remember comments I didn't especially want to hear many months later and implement that change long after the dilemma has ended. Also, over time, you start to get a group of very helpful people who enjoy your dilemmas, start to know how much change you're willing to handle, understand your style preferences, etc. That's happened for me and my recent dilemmas have been nearly all helpful and supportive rather than critical. I enjoy the process too. If I hired a decorator, it would all happen too fast for me. I like to ponder each and every decision and spend money slowly and carefully.

I never received any suggestions - even though I enclosed a picture of my currant fireplace and ask how I might change it.

I still haven't decided upon any changed.

Try another dilemma Ann - some days are just kind of tough to get responses and other days people flood in immediately. I think I'd simplify your fireplace decor a bit by removing about half of it. I love what you have going on in the top cubby though!

Declutter it Ann.

I have posted several trying to get advice or suggestions. Also have done a couple of before & after post. I have gotten lots of good comments & suggestions from Houzz people. My problem was that my very 1st post on here ended up on the Houzz facebook page. Lots of really rude or should I say stupid comments come from fb. It was a pic of my house that we had just bought & I was trying to figure out what style porch to add to the front. One comment on fb was "doze that elephant down". Now what does that have to do with a porch? I laugh at it now.

Yikes, I don't use facebook and didn't know about that problem. Isn't there a way to opt out of your contributions being shared there? Of course, people can be rude or stupid on regular Houzz postings, too. Before and after can be especially problematic because some readers are always going to prefer the "before" look. I'm in that category about 90% of the time, so I try to not comment. What's done is done, after all.

I think that if you post a dilemma, you are inviting critique. Because people suggest things you do not like does NOT mean that you need to heed their advice, but knowledge is power. If several people are telling you something is wrong or out of place, maybe you need to reconsider what you're doing. If only one or two people tell you that, well, that's simply their opinion.

Ultimately, you can do whatever you please! It's YOUR home!

I think people are brave to post photos of their personal space. It goes without saying that there is going to be a certain percentage of people who don't like what you're doing. But there's also going to be a certain percentage of people that have suggestions you NEVER would have considered. Input from strangers regarding design can be good.

I'm trying to get the nerve up to post my own dilemma and look forward to the critique. After all, that's what I want. I just don't want to look like I haven't thought everything through on my own first.

n...very insightful and informed advice...just be aware that if the editorial board (whoever that is) takes offense to a "critique" anyone posts here (innocent, non-malicious or humorous as it may have been) the "critique" will be deleted...seen it... so go ahead and post your "dilemma"...i look forward to it...cheers.

n247080, I know how you feel. I'll post pictures of our renovation, and then a day later delete them as it's just strange having pictures of my home out there for everyone to see.

Ann, I agree with the two (three?) previous posters on your fireplace. But I wouldn't call it "clutter"...there are just too many objects up there for the eye to focus on at any one time. I think (and trust me, I'm not a design "professional" by any stretch of the imagination, but I have a pretty good eye for proportions) there should be no more than 2/3 of the cubicles (we called them "pukas" when I was growing up in Hawaii) filled. So, 1/3 should be empty..that allows,your eye to view it as a total "scene" and so you want to have only the very favorite hints up there. Start like this....take EVERYTHING off and put into a box so your peripheral vision and memory aren't getting distracted. Then put one object on the left, one on the right one puka higher, then one in the middle. ??? How does that look?...start moving just those 3 around until you find a pleasing "tableau", then add in a couple more....maybe 2 in one puka, 3 in another, 1 in another. Just remember to keep a couple of them empty....your eye will know. Give it a few days in between each addition. Then post again with new photos.

Hints??? That was supposed to be "things"....gaaaa... Typing on iPad hard. Sorry.

oh gaaaaa for sure Ann....not only am I on the iPad, but it's early and my eyes must not be awake yet. I'm seeing not numerous pukas but just two...one on top of the other, and the sides have framed photos/art. I'm so sorry...
I would still take everything out of the pukas, and take the art down too. Do you have one large, colorful bowl, vase, statue that you like? If so, put it in the lower puka. Then, in the top puka, put three smaller (in height) objects (from a collection?)....two on one side of the space and the third on the other side.
Don't hang up the art just yet...live with that for awhile to see if you maybe want to move the art to somewhere else. Empty wall space can actually enhance the total picture. I think if you have some really fabulous things in those niches, that may be all you need. Anyway...give it a try if what I'm suggesting makes sense. and again, my bad for not looking closer the first time. ;-)

I have never posted a dilemma on Houzz. I
am not sure I ever will.

I thought hard about this dilemma-posting
thing and I have come to the conclusion that I am too private and too
possessive and sensitive about the creation of my personal space to invite comment. I have
not been on Houzz long enough to have gathered enough acquaintances either.
There are some IDs that I recognize and appreciate because over time I have
read a number of comments from them that were informative, open-minded and
sensible, but not enough to be comfortable ‘putting myself out there’ to be
remarked on by the entire Houzz
community.

Something happened that made me feel wary:
A ‘Houzz tour’ was posted of a young couples’ space and the first commenter
wrote something really unkind. The second poster was much better. Yet, in the
hours that followed there were loads of ‘likes’ for the ugly comment and very
few for the nice comment. Finally, Houzz deleted the harsh comment. - I would
have felt so bad if I had been the person kindly allowing virtual guests into
my home and seeing how the rudest one gets validation like this. It was
shocking and I decided: whatever hair-brained, corkscrew and benighted ideas of
mine enjoy realization for lack of enlightened virtual preventative advice…well
so be it then – I wouldn’t notice anyway. When it comes to the ‘real-live’
visitors who physically enter my sphere – the motto is: Those that mind don’t
matter, and those that matter don’t mind.

However, I do have tremendous respect for
those that post. Be it posting a tour of their house, project or dilemma – I am
in awe of their bravery and their community spirit for contributing to the site
and I feel very strongly about not making them feel uncomfortable about it. If
I have anything of value to offer I do; if I can say nothing of worth I prefer
to keep silent.

How do you post your main photo (on the left side) in design dilemma? I just see "photo", but it uploads to the discussion, not the photo box on the left. Thanks for any cues on this. And yes, I've posted once here.

I do notice that many people who "ask" for help quickly dismiss it. But then that is why their rooms look bad in the first place. They should understand that designers and artists are able to understand elements they don't see.... Scale, balance, color schemes, color value, etc. I see too many rooms jammed with vinyl reclining sofa, loveseat and big squishy chair. Then they ask for help. When they are repeatedly told how to fix the "dilemma" they respond....."the furniture is staying"!!! LOL!!!!!

I have helped out with more than a few before. As a GC, though, I focus more on answering questions regarding construction, but the occasional design dilemma doesn't hurt ;)

I have posted a few times and gotten helpful suggestions. The best was when I posted a picture of a wallpaper I had seen and someone identified the manufacturer within minutes. Saved me a lot of time! I do find a few designers who assume OP’s are cheap and use lousy materials. I am getting ready to post soon again since I need help selecting a roofing material. I am grateful when I get the advice since I am very thoughtful about spending money and not all my friends are as interested in design as I am. Unfortunately I have not had luck with hiring interior design professionals, although I have had great success with kitchen designers and architects and landscape designers.