I don't think she is crazy and think she should go for it. The idea of helping her so she doesn't need to sell her current house until after she has moved into her new house is good too--we did it that way.

Whether you are 18 or 81, everybody needs something exciting to look forward to. How wonderful it is for you and your dh to be willing/able to support her decision.

I agree - it's wonderful since she's done it before and she knows what it will take.....and you and DH are willing to help if/when needed.

My parents have a friend in her 80s, who just built her 5th or 6th house. Her DH has been deceased since the late 60s, so she's done them all on her own. No children/no DH/no BF.

I wish her luck!

"We would even be willing to go in with her to buy the land and get it built "

You'll probably have to. Traditional lenders have policies against lending to seniors.

If she's of sound mind and not too unsound body, why not? Assuming she's not going to wield much in the way of work tools.

Absolutely!! I agree that no matter what the age we all need something to keep us busy and young! I applaud her willingness to take on such a task, and your willingness to help. God Bless.

I think its a great idea. She is so blessed to have you and your DH willing and financially able to help her. If she is like most parents she probably helped you at some time in your life and what comes around goes around. How nice it would be to ride out ones remaining years in a home designed just for them. You (and her) will be able to think of ways to make the home as accessible to her as possible if/when her health deteriorates so that she can stay in her home as long as possible. And 81 is still a spring chicken - she may have a good 20 years left in her so she may as well enjoy them. Good luck.

I think it's perfectly reasonable for her to build a house at 81, and I would love to know what features she wants in the house.

We always get the builder/architect perspective on what's appropriate for people of her age - but we rarely get input from knowledgable people who are actually there (age-wise).

Claire

I think the people that think she's crazy shouldn't have a vote. Just think what all we could accomplish, at any age, if we didn't have naysayers.

Absolutely! I'm 70 (DH is 56, so he doesn't count in the old-age sweepstakes) and we're building our 3rd new house. This is the first completely custom one. It's been great! Congratulations to you, your DH, and your Mom. How wonderful that you are so supportive of her.

Go for it! Age is only in your mind and this could be a huge mental and physical boost for her.

First off I think this is really cool and wish your mom the best of luck should she decide to "go for it". And, I think that you're a great child to want to help her. Good for you!

However, I think Worthy might have a point about getting financing. I've read where many banks will not do a construction loan to anyone under 23 or over 65. Options would be for your mom to either finance her own construction, find another lender, find financing from someone she knows or, maybe a lender will allow you (if you agree) to be the guarantor.

Everyone but my DH and I thinks she's crazy. This might be a bigger problem then financing. I don't know who everyone is, but it sounds like you might be having some "discussions" already even though this is just wishful thinking at this stage. If you're talking about other family members and, you decide to become a guarantor, you might want to see a lawyer to make sure everything is done in such a way as no hard feelings could happen on any side.

Wow, great responses! She is definitely of sound mind, but the body is a little iffy, LOL! Truthfully, people are amazed when they find out how old she is. I don't think she would need a full-fledged ADA type house because by that time, she would just move in with us.

Claire, she wants flat ceilings, no pot shelves, large bedrooms and a formal living and dining room. It's hard to find a home in this area that's either not a fixer-upper or doesn't have those huge ceilings. If the right house came on the market, she would certainly consider that option. We have already done a little searching over the last six months.

Kats, yes, it is family members. My parents have been very generous with all of us. But still, we would never do anything without consulting a lawyer. However, my DH and I are under 23, so that will be an issue (just kidding!)

She has talked about it several times, but she saw my home plan magazine yesterday and wanted to take it home. We will, of course, take our time and look for the right property. Who knows how long that will take, but I think I have convinced her to at least take that first step to start looking. I'm already searching the internet :)

She has a right to do whatever she wants. If she has the money then she should go for it. She sounds like a very sharp lady who knows her mind. Today 81 is what 65 use to be. She has 20 or more years to live. Why not live comfortably?

I was at my hairdresser today and he told me he has a client who is 101 years old!! Yep, and up until a year ago, was walking. Now she needs the assistance of a wheelchair. When he ask her how she likes her hair she responds, I can't see too good, but with all the time you spent on it, it must look great!!

One is never too old to follow a dream. I think it is absolutely wonderful that she wants to build a house. With the help and buffer you and your DH will provide this project will give her something to look forward to and to feel satisfaction from for years to come. I have relatives that are well younger than her that show hardly any interest in anything other than tv. What a great example she sets and kudos to you for helping her and encouraging her!

She cannot possibly build a house at any younger age.

Any of us might die tomorrow, at any age! It's important to live while you're alive -- as opposed to planning for your death. Kudos to you for supporting your mother in this endeavor. The rest of the family is apparently planning for her to die soon, they should just shut up and get out of the way. Best of luck to her!

I'm 67, just finished our own-design small house. All I can say is that I sure hope we got it right the first time 'cause I sure wouldn't want to do it again. Of course, we planned this one so that it would work for us at age 81, or whatever.

I'm 42 and right about now I'm feeling that I am way too old to build a house but that is probably just the stage I am at. :)

Another vote for "go for it"

Great story, Brutuses! And Cotton, my sister's in-laws are like that. My in-laws are very active, but for about 5 years now, they have talked about either remodeling or selling to buy newer. They still have done neither and they are early 60's.

Willie, you did a beautiful job on your new house. You must be so proud. I just realized that the last house my parents built was a small "vacation" house back in 1993. They were about your age. They already had the land and did use a builder so it wasn't as stressful as yours.

My mother was delighted to know there was so much encouragement. Thanks again!

houseful You say your mother was at least 58 when you were born.

Compared to that, building a house is a piece of cake!