Do you have some way to post a picture of said items, would be worth a thousand words of explanation.
On both sides...
Trying to repair something and not knowing the process would be hard for you, sounds like you don't crochet?
If you do, and can send along a picture, go to my page, and send me a private email, and we can try to resolve your dilemma?

No to the glue idea. Please do not glue it! I have done a lot of this type of work and was curator for a museum specializing in antique textile preservation. I learned most of what I know from reading online about it first by searching for "antique textile restoration", "...preservation", and by looking for books in the libraries of large cities for the subject. I recommend crocheting small patches with matching yarn then insert using sewing thread... and using a crochet hook to rework parts that are unraveled. If those sound like something you are NOT capable of, find an experienced local crocheter and ask for their help. I would help anyone with a project like this if they lived near me, so chances are someone in your area would too. There is a certain art to restoration. Please dont make a hasty decision. Heirlooms are very special.