I normally recommend a matte finish on the walls, even in kitchen and bathrooms. Colours are truer in matte and less forgiving if there are imperfections in the vertical surfaces. They are washable today especially Benjamin Moore Aura, and there is Aura bath and spa which is mold and mildew resistant. For the trim I usually recommend the Aura satin or semi-gloss. If you are concerned about sheen go with satin although the semi-gloss does not have a very shiny look. There is also BM Advance which goes on like an oil but is waterborne as well. It comes in a pearl finish which you might like. Painters seem to love this product because of its flow.

I don't find semi-gloss to be too shiny, but if you are concerned a satin would work as well.

I like semi-gloss, but have used satin. Both work. I've done satin on low ceilings to get a bit of reflectivity. How much hand traffic will the trim get? You want the most washable for certain areas.

The ceilings are 10 ft and 9 ft so really the only hand traffic will be the doors and cabinets. So matte for walls, flat for ceilings and either satin or semi gloss for trim....If I choose satin for the trim, how much of a contrast will there be between the walls and trim?

Enough that you will see it but not "in-your- face" gloss. It will be elegant. It really is personal preference. There is no right or wrong.

I prefer satin on trim and always use matte for walls for same reasons Susan Silverman Designs mentioned. Do not like eggshell for walls. Have used it an regretted the outcome. Matte is so much better for walls. You can use flat for the ceiling, which is cheaper, because you won't be washing it.

Thanks everyone!! I appreciate all the advice!!