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jeff147

Horror Stories. Watcha Got?

19 years ago

Ok, let's hear your horror stories! Here's mine.

At our first open house, the previous agent 'insisted' I stay as she felt uncomfortable by herself (i know this is issue itself but let me go on). At the last minute a large ethnic family pulls up. Two men, 4 kids, 2 women and a really old lady. I wait in the basement (which has view of entry). Whole family except grandma walks up stairs. Grandma sort of shakes a bit, drips a nice juicy squeeze of crap on the entry floor then walks upstairs Like nothing happened.

I'm in total shock! This women just crapped in my hall. The whole family trails around then goes to leave (not saying a word about the turd on the floor next to their shoes). One of the men says, "How do you keep your house so clean?" I felt like saying, "By not letting Grandma use the my floor as a toilet!" The agent was mortified when I told her what that was on the floor after they left. She screams, "we have a 2nd showing in 5 minutes" and goes to clean it up. As she is cleaning it and I am running for the fabreeze the 2nd showing knocks on door! Agent lets them in and says, "I am sorry but we just had a rather large family go thru and someone had an accident." I don't think she has done another open house for anyone since this.

True story.

Comments (139)

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    airforceguy - email me through my profile and I'll give you the link to sites.

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    I wouldn't call this a horror story on par with any of the animal and human waste stories :) but a little creepy nonetheless. DH and I looked at a place whose owner was a doll collector. Every available surface - bookshelves, tops of kitchen cabinets, bathroom ledges, specially built nooks, beds - was replete with cascades of dolls of all shapes, sizes and constructions. I could not think of anything except, "how does she DUST around all this stuff?!?", while my husband was freaking out with all the glassy doll eyes following him from room to room. It was...unique.

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    In Chicago we got to see the 3bed/2bath house. Couple had lived there 50 yrs plus. So on top of all the stuff we had to wade through on the first and second floor, we discussed that we had only seen one bath. WELL, we had yet to check out the basement. There it was, a toilet on the landing of the staircase from the first fl to the basement, working plumbing and everything. We'd have bought but for the landing not having a sink. NOT!

    We also went into a super curb appeal house in Portland OR recently. Family had moved out but we were greeted by the 20-ish age son smoking a cigarette as soon as we walked in the door. My husband decided to talk to the son about the house: "had to sell, not happy about it. dad had been shot 15 times by the police recently and died. I mean, why couldn't they have just shot him twice so he had a chance". at that point, we didn't look upstairs (as the downstairs was a pit) and left before WE got shot! : )

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    DH and I looked at a place whose owner was a doll collector.

    I can't believe she left her dolls out. I collect also, don't have them everywhere though. It was the first thing to be packed when we were getting ready to sell.

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    We were recently at an open house where the owner's mother, who was the tenant, decided to gut a whole fish in the kitchen. In the middle of the open house. The stench was awful.

    She also left all her dirty laundry hanging in the bathroom.

    Eeew.

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    "I can't believe she left her dolls out. I collect also, don't have them everywhere though."

    Yep, it was bad. I'm really not exaggerating about the cascades of dolls - the place had three bedrooms and each of the beds had piles of dolls all over the pillow area. They were heaped next to each other on top of the kitchen cabs - not displayed one at a time, but jumbled together like kids piling onto a chair in a game of Musical Chairs. They were in the bathroom medicine chest - owner had removed the mirrored front and piled dolls on the shelf inside. Dolls EVERYWHERE. It was eerie.

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    We went to a showing where the owner had opened cans of wet cat food and dumped them on the kitchen counter. Imagine the smell, plus the large plastic portable urinal for the eldery person living in the living room. I felt sorry for them, but really, it smelled awful.

    Then there was the home where we weren't allowed to see the basement because that's where the dogs lived. Um ok.

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Zeebee, I know of a lady that was pretty bad, but not quite that bad. Even thought I love dolls, people can get out of hand with their collections.

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Not as bad as some - but we went to see this house once that was way out of town, should have turned back when the realtor mentioned that the owners had been renovating and were now getting a divorce...

    The entire house was half renovated. Plastic sheeting was the only back door, the kitchen was half ripped apart and the floor was rather sagging - found out when we went to the basement that they'd removed all the walls downstairs, and the only thing supporting it was a few upright pipes (don't think they were the proper type of temporary support).

    The house was listed at what it would have been worth had it been finished. We didn't offer. DH liked the outbuildings, but I went and sat in the van and said there is no way we're getting this, no way, no how.

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    "At our first open house, the previous agent 'insisted' I stay as she felt uncomfortable by herself (i know this is issue itself but let me go on). At the last minute a large ethnic family pulls up."

    What does their ethnicity have to do with the events of the showing?

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    lavern - you are kidding right?
    That discussion was beaten to death, and this thread had finally gotten back on track.
    Please, read the whole thread before posting.

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    gregg h, Sorry, I didn't read all the responses. I still wonder why ethnicity is an issue.

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    here we go again,lol..Lavern, it wasn't about ethnicity at all, it was a description within a story...Now if the OP said a bunch of Micks( i am irish)or a bunch of guineas( i am also italian), then perhaps,perhaps,it could be construed as offensive...Peeople REALLY need to lighten up...

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    here we go again,lol..Lavern, it wasn't about ethnicity at all, it was a description within a story...Now if the OP said a bunch of Micks( i am irish)or a bunch of guineas( i am also italian), then perhaps,perhaps,it could be construed as offensive...Peeople REALLY need to lighten up...

    With a word like "ethnic" we can all just interpret it according to our own bias.

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Looking at the dictionary, I see nothing bad with the word "ethnic" Amazing how people want to automatically see something negative when it comes to human relations. I'm a Canadian, now resideing in the DC area, and wow, what an eye opener at times, lol!!

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    I can't see how identifying the family as ethnic adds to the statement. Does it make it funnier? It's not the word ethnic it's how it's used. If OP was not thinking different in a negative way he would have written just family.

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Mmm hmmm, and why does it matter that the family was "large" - did the op mean to disparage people who have more than two children? I have four, but it hasn't caused my mom to crap in other people's foyers. And op mentions they pulled up at the "last minute"....should I be insulted, was op suggesting that procrastinators are less civilized than "early birds"? And why is it important that the crapper was a grandma - are women less couth than men? Why not say "senior citizen"? NOT that their citizeneship status matters!! Is there any evidence she was the grandma, maybe she was the great aunt, or even just a friend from church. I'm guessing jeff147 has thought better of sharing any more funny stories with this crowd. Pity.

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Yes, it's a pity that there are posters such as Lavern that are so easily offended by the slightest word. If Lavern is too lazy to read through all posts dealing with the word "ethnic" ad nauseam, then she deserves to be ignored.

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    I did read the whole thread. I'm not offended. I'm still wondering why ethnicity makes a difference. Now ignore me.

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    kksmama - the more I read your last post, the more I liked you!

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Maybe the Realtor asked the seller to remain because she *was* experienced at holding open houses.

    We're hearing more & more horror stories of solitary Realtors being robbed or assaulted in open houses, or of the houses being robbed.

    If there're more than 1 or 2 visitors, you cannot know where everybody is:

    If you're hosting an open house & several adults & older children (not babies or toddlers) split up & everybody goes different ways, they could be robbing the place blind for all you know.

    (Read the post above about the kids going through drawers & such.)

    There was a couple in our area several years ago who cut a swath through the nicest homes, taking mostly jewelry & cash.

    They would stay for a very long time in an open house, wandering through it several times (memorizing the layout? noting where the valuables were?), "sharing" stories with the Realtor about how excited they were about the house, about their daughter & how concerned they were about getting her into a school with a solid program for gifted students...in every instance, they had the Realtor convinced that they were going to buy that house.

    At some point, one of them would have to go to the bathroom.

    Then they'd leave, giving the Realtor their cell phone & hotel info.

    & the owners would return home to find the jewelry & cash gone.

    Cell #s, hotel info, employment info were all false.

    "ethnic", well, I've taken classes that encouraged us (brokers & agents) to learn what's normal buying or selling or social behavior for buyers & sellers who do things differently from us, so that we can be more effective in helping them.

    (for instance, we learned about "mattress money";
    for most loans, the borrower must provide a paper trail showing how they acquired the money they're using for down payment & closing.
    Saying "I had it under my mattress" won't work...unless you are from an ethnicity or culture or group that is likely to keep money under the mattress rather than in a bank.)

    While I have had 2 experiences where I showed one spouse houses & the other spouse didn't even see the home until the day of closing (you gotta have some very experienced buyers for that!), most couples see homes together, & some *families*, even more than 2 generations, see homes together.

    The mishap was just a mishap, & it doesn't mean the lady wasn't wearing underwear.
    It has to do with the way the underwear fits & with what the person is wearing in addition to underwear.
    A dress doesn't protect from embarrassment the way trousers would.
    (In my past life, I worked in a grocery store, & one of the package boys had to help out an elderly couple who had the same mishap.)

    I think the original story was meant to be just a funny story, & the adjectives & such were included to heighten the image.

    I guess the only "horror story" I have is that one of the agents who was fooled by the thieves worked in my office, & she was so upset over it that I had to go with her to the police station to make her statement.

    I always strongly advise my sellers to *remove* valuables such as cash, coins, easily pocketed items like scrimshaw, coins, & jewelry, & prescription medicines.

    Sometimes the seller would say, "well, it's all secured, nobody can get into that gun case, it's locked", or "we keep all our medications in a locked medicine cabinet, nobody can get in there without making a lot of noise, & the Realtor would *have* to notice".

    All someone has to do is come back later, & locked cases & medicine cabinets are signals that there's something valuable in there.

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    sylviatexas:

    Actually you are precisely right, the agent had just been informed by the real estate board that there was a rash of robberies and the modus operandi was a very large family would come in and split up. She has said they told her agents were being assaulted, purses stolen, etc. Which is why I think she was so traumatized with this specific incident while I just brushed it off as happenstance.

    Btw, one other thing I do recommend is hiding mail, especially credit card or bank statements. I assure you (from working in the insurance and security industry) it takes little more than a CC statement or even just a bank account number to wipe you out.

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Ok, I just had to post a horror story from the other side. I have been a real estate agent for 20 years and thought I had seen it all until this. I had a buyer who wanted to see a particular house. There was a tenant living in the house who was the best friend of the owner. After 2 weeks of trying to get my buyer in, I decided to show them the idential house from the same builder in another town. They loved the house but wanted the one in the other town that we could not get into. They decided to put an offer in site unseen. The offer was accepted and low and behold the tenant allowed us to get in for a home inspection. Everything was fine with the inspection. We were on our way. :) About a week later, my buyer calls me and says, he drove by, and the tenant was having a yard sale. I said, thats great, it means she's getting ready to leave. Monday morning the attorney calls me and asks me to go and make sure the appliances were still in the house. I call the state police and ask for an escort because we have had so many problems with this tenant. State police show up, the tenant was not there, we walk in and I am speechless. The state trooper is staring at me, I can't speak. Im standing there with my hand on my mouth in shock. He says, "are you alright"? Still, I couldnt speak. He says, is something wrong? I said, they took the kitchen, there was a kitchen here, then he realizes the house is missing all the kitchen cabinets, the appliances, the kitchen island, the vanities in the bathroom. There were holes in the ceiling, the tenant sold the central air conditioning unit and all the venting. Anything that could be unscrewed and removed, was.

    The poor owner not only lost a ton of money on the sale of this house, she also found out the tenant, her best friend since they were 8 years old, had also stolen her identity, had taken out loans in her name, ruined her credit, the works.

    Last I heard the police were talking to the police in Jaimaica authorities where she fleed to have her brought back to the US for prosecution.

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    WOW Linda, your story seems to be 'the' Horror Story so far. If there was a prize I think you should get it.

    Sellers should put away knife block/s to try prevent a real horror story. They pose a risk to the realtor, of being stabbed, and they also don't look good.

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    sylvia - you make some very reasonable and valid points. One thing I don't understand from your story is the use of the bathroom.... hmmm... it just popped into my head - was it to steal prescription meds?

    Linda - your story takes the cake. What prompted the lawyer to call you to check on the house?

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Sparksals, Im not really sure what prompted the attorney to call except that the buyer might have mentioned the "yard sale" when he went in to sign contracts. We found a list of everything she had sold. She sold a year old kitchen for $350, central air for $350. The sadest part is, the people that visited that yard sale and purchased those items had to know something wasnt right, but instead, they closed their eyes, and ran away with their "steals". Hopefully, some day, she will get what she deserves and the seller will get what she deserves for having to go thru this.

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Going to the bathroom is a legitimate reason for leaving the presence of the Realtor or host, leaving your spouse/partner to chat with the Realtor & keep her from noticing if you don't go where you announced you were going.

    If you said 'going to bathroom' & instead went to the master bedroom where the jewelry box was located, the Realtor would notice unless she was distracted.

    This particular pair didn't seem to be interested in drugs, just cash & small things that were easy to sell (jewelry).

    But you never can tell.

    I once had a seller blame me because his *gun* was missing.

    Had I known a gun was in the house, I'd have insisted he put it somewhere else, like locked in the trunk of his car.

    turns out his own teen-aged son Chris had pawned the gun:

    The older daughter, who was friends with the daughter of another agent, told her friend that Chris had been stealing their parents' things for years & using the money for drugs, & that her parents declined to believe it.

    Next time the seller called, wanting me to pay him something like $600 to replace the gun, I told him I wanted to see young Chris take a polygraph before I discussed the matter any further.

    never heard another word, sold the house...

    Duh, maybe I do have a horror story of my very own!

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Linda - that's absolutely horrible. I hope the people who bought the items get what they deserve too. Karma's a B****

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    We looked at a house that backed up to the freeway. When we walked in the backyard the road noise forced us to raise our voices to be understood. In addition, I noticed there was yellow crime scene tape stretched along one side of the yard to the back of the property. We asked the agent about it but he just chuckled, made a joke and said he didn't know why it was there.

    The agent had told us that the sellers were moving because they had 4 kids and had to move to a larger house. When we checked the property records, the house they moved to was smaller.

    We didn't care for the house enough to further investigate why the tape was there.

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Wow Dreamgarden! I would be leary of a home like that too. The freeway noise would be bad enough, but crime tape? No way I would buy that home. You'd think the LA would remove it if they legally could do so.

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    So what's wrong with using the word "ethnic"? People are just too over the top with this entire politically correct business. Heck, we are all "ethnic" in many ways. I'm Irish through and through and mighty proud of it. Call me whatever you want, it really doesn't make a bit of difference, does it? Now, don't try using some of those terrible words, and we all know what they are! Now THAT is being hateful and extremely insulting.

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    I feel *so* bad for that poor old dead horse!

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Kat123, nothing is wrong with the word ethnic. I am still trying to understand why the term was used in that story. It says the family belonged to a certain group of people, which one? Does the word ethnic give you a better picture of the family? I don't think so. If the OP had said a large Italian family came in would we know more, probably not? Because the actual actions were distasteful it leads one to think the OP was implying ethnic groups with grandmas defecate on the floor. It sounds like stereotyping.

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    I'm feeling just as "bad for that poor old dead horse!"

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    I am beginning to wonder if there is a glue factory somewhere nearby...............

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    I said it before, but I just have to say it again: I thought the OP's story was brilliantly written. It could be a poem (has an almost Joycean flavor to it).

    I have read so many foul and offensive things on the Internet. This does not fall into that category, IMO.

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Political correctness has nothing to do with anything.

    The term ethnic as defined in the Random House Unabridged Dictionary, © Random House, Inc. 2006.

    adjective
    1. pertaining to or characteristic of a people, esp. a group (ethnic group) sharing a common and distinctive culture, religion, language, or the like.

    2. referring to the origin, classification, characteristics, etc., of such groups.

    3. being a member of an ethnic group, esp. of a group that is a minority within a larger society: ethnic Chinese in San Francisco.

    1. of, pertaining to, or characteristic of members of such a group.

    5. belonging to or deriving from the cultural, racial, religious, or linguistic traditions of a people or country: ethnic dances

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Oh good grief. Let it die already!

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Lavern,give it a rest already.
    Schlemeel, schlemazel, hasenfeffer incorporated.
    Perhaps you can round up Shirley,Lenny and Squiggy and find somethingelse to bide your time

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    The horse just died. Long live the horse!

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    quoting from the OP

    "I'm in total shock! This women just crapped in my hall."

    what a poetic sentence !!!!!!!!! sorry harriet, I couldn't resist ; I do respect your opinion that the OP is a poet, almost joycean. I just don't agree, lol.......

    some horses never die.

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Have you ever read Joyce? His stuff is pretty racy, and quite humorous, and in places very foul...Joyce liked to write about bodily functions, in fact. I'd say Joyce would have appreciated and been amused by the OP's story...as I was. ;-)

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    ok, so I learned something today about litterature, point well taken !!

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    When he said "ethnic" I immediately thought, well, they must be from Crapdropistan....isn't that where Borat's from, too?

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    I recently looked at a house advertised "WOW!! Just needs a little love" lots of exclamation points. Price pretty right for the neighborhood. Just no floor in the dining room, and no bathrooms - anywhere. All right one used to be in the same dining room area where there is now no floor. Oh yeah an attic full of walkers and other assorted elderly stuff. It used to be connected to the house next to it as part of an "assisted living facility" Did I mention the creative wiring, most of it romex hanging from the ceiling? I'm amazed it was ever an assisted living facility. The 200K it would take to make it liveable plus the no longer attractive price - I hope they like that place cause it's gonna be on the market a looooooong time. :)

    Creepy on way too many levels.

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Here's on that just happened in my area: homeowner places home for sale with Assist2Sell, leaves to care for sick relative with 9 dogs and 5 cats in cages, unfed, crap on the floor the works. A Realtor (probably showing the house!) tipped off the SPCA/cops. Link to newspaper story here

    Here's a link to a pic inside the house: {{gwi:2038013}}

    Plus, the house is still on the MLS!

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    RE: Novahomesick story about the people & their decorator. I would have to do something to let them know that they weren't as clever as they thought.... I like the idea of billing them for decorating advice - who cares if you don't get any money, just letting them know that you knew what they did ....priceless! You could also see if the decorator was "licensed" in your state & could check into filing a complaint. How about having friends call the decorator (provided she does a free initial consulting) and waste a bit of her time - like they did yours - ending the meeting with " You know, I just saw a house I liked, maybe you could just go there & copy evertyhing......" maybe he/she would get it after about the 3rd time. And you could have a "HaHaHa!" moment of your own at their expense. (I can't take full credit for this plan -- it was hatched while stuck in traffic this morning with my DH who I affectionately call Mr. PA (passive/aggressive). He deals with people like this all the time as an artist I can't tell you how many times he's heard "I can make that myself" or watched people take photos of one-of-a-kind peices with their cell phones. People.)

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Just gotta say, there's nothing that creates a diversion like grandma dropping a juicy one on the floor. Sandy

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    skylyn... wow! I hope those people get the book thrown at them for such cruelty to animals. What were they thinking? Unbelievable!

  • 19 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Hey emb7! I saw one today- a toilet on the landing of the staircase from the first floor to the basement.

    There's more than one house with this set-up; how scary is that??