"I'm just an engineer who does not have good abilities in this area so it is tempting to just accept the recommendation. But, I'm an anal engineer so I cannot! "

LOL! I tend to agree with you. My floors are going in now. They're hickory and my island is going to be natural cherry. The color is closer to the cabinets than I thought it would be, but with the hickory grain, there's a definite difference in the wood.

If you would rather have contrast, I think you'd regret it if you didn't speak up.

quartersawn oak is a cut of oak that looks great natural
or one pigment shade up from that. Contemplate going lighter on the cabs-the beautiful rays in the cuts show so well that way.You could keep the oak floor,even take the floor a bit darker-caramel,perhaps...then the two surfaces will play off each other.

In my last kit my one regret was the cabs and floor had no contrast.

How about considering a cork floor. Soft to walk on. Love my cork insoles - but we decided to keep our current floor.
I currently have oak - and it is pretty - one of the hardest things was to find a cabinet color that didn't look like I was trying to match and failed.
I ended up going with autumn cherry with a black stain and kept the original oak floor.
PS My OCD Engineer DH is pretty good with color - won't say anything unless it is critical, so just an engineer doesn't fly.

Here is a preview of our kitchen with the cherry cabinets and the oak floor

I feel for you... I finally made my flooring decision. Of all the decisions it was by far the most difficult and took the longest and most searching around, etc.

Will your quarter sawn oak cabinets be white oak or red? If you have a choice I would opt for white.

In my last house we did a white kitchen but our bar area was built of quarter sawn oak and our floors were quarter and rift sawn white oak, stained a medium brown and similar stain color on the bar cabinets.

I loved the way it looked, but not sure I would have wanted an entire kitchen done with floors and cabinets in the same tone.

Someone above mentioned liking some contrast... I feel the same way.

Will post some pics in case they help - sorry I don't have a better one of the oak cabinets and floors together.

Also, just my opinion but I think quarter sawn white oak is just SO beautiful but I find red oak floors to be sort of ordinary in comparison. Its a good durable floor for sure though.

There are many kitchens with wood floor and wood toned cabinets. The trick is to go at least two shades difference.
Otherwise it will get that "cigar box" effect. Although, some people like lots of wood!
I would see if your KD can show you a live example of what she is suggesting.

Communication is really important. Have you asked
your designer what she means? Can she give you some
examples so you can see? Perhaps once you get some ideas
you might feel easy with her direction.
I have a few photos but I urge you to talk, communicate
and find out what she means so you will feel good
about the direction.
~boxer