First of all cancel all the upgrades that you can hire out after place is done and before you move in. Whatever the builder is putting in you can do for 1/2 the price from an independent. When I bought my house it was 3/4 finished. I chose to have standard everything that was included. Then I installed granite countertops for 1/2 of the upgrade price. Same with my flooring. I had the carpet that was included in the house price, then took it out and installed hardwood for 1/2 the cost that the builder wanted. Of course all the upgrades will be included in the mortgage and there will be a cash output, but gees, to me it was worth a lower mortgage payment and saving so much money for the same upgrades.

If the home of your dreams is going to cost you more than what you can comfortably afford, then it's not really a dream home. Set a budget and stick to it.

What did you upgrade? Some upgrades are worth it now, and other things can wait. I built the home of my dreams, with the builders grade materials in all of my bathrooms, and slowly upgraded to what I really wanted. Are you getting hardwood flooring, if so, can this wait....etc..

Have you considered a smaller house? You might be able to afford the upgrades you want with less square footage. Just a thought.

If you needed (and can actually afford) $100,000 in "upgrades", you should've been looking at the next-level homes to begin with.