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joseph_corlett

Two Hits, Two Misses

In the repair business, it's always critical to find out who screwed up what, because if a customer screws something up, her standards for an acceptable repair are considerably lower than if someone else did it. With lowered expectations, your chances of collecting are greater.

The first two pictures are before, the second two after.

This lady's contractor split her 2cm top with a 2cm edge build up and unfortunately, the crack doesn't go all the way through to the seam and through the granite, limiting cost-effective repair options. Since she's entitled to 100%, I'm not going to invest a lot of time in getting her to 95%. His splitting the stone with a hairline at the sink corner is the kiss of death for me.

With drive time, I'm three hours in for nuthin'. She appreciated my efforts though. Non-collects and/or discounts are rare and a cost of doing business.

Sink chip repairs don't get much better than this, if I do say so myself. The white spots in the second picture are super glue flakes.

Teenagers and estone, the secret to my economic success. This customer balked when I insisted he text me that he hold me harmless for attempting a repair. No release, no Joe, nonnegotiable. I packed up my gear and he relented at the last second. Stay mad at your kids; you're not getting mad at me on the interwebby no matter what.

I explained that it makes no economic sense for me to bet $4,000.00, the cost of replacing his section of tops, for the opportunity to earn less than $300.00 for ten minutes of work.

Yeah, you can still see a bit of splotch, but you can't feel it and the gloss matches nearly perfectly. When he goes to sell, his buyer's home inspector will never find it. I'll put this guy in the "grudgingly satisfied" category when I cash his check.

Any architect who specifies Cashmere White granite for a fast food joint should have his license revoked. Disgusting, but the food was delicious. Not my job, but I needed another miss.

Comments (8)

  • 9 years ago

    If I were building a fast food joint, I'm pretty sure I'd go with stainless steel. That's just disgusting looking.

  • 9 years ago

    What is that disgusting last picture?

    Good job!

  • 9 years ago

    Just curious (as a mother of a teenager), what did the teen put on the counter to create that damage?

  • PRO
    9 years ago

    "Do you perhaps have a blog or anything of that sort?"


    I write professionally.

  • PRO
    9 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    "Just curious (as a mother of a teenager), what did the teen put on the counter to create that damage?"

    DuPont, the manufacturer of Zodiaq quartz surfaces, flew an engineer to one of my jobs twice and wrote a technical bulletin on repairs that came from the same job. The teenagers etched a $12,000.00 top with a battery charger and blamed it on a candle; the parents fell for it. Impossible.

    These characters, almost teenagers, toed the "that's our story and we're sticking to it" line to great unpunished success. I can't say I blame them, it worked, but as to what they did to cause the damage remains unknown.

    In one of my I-even-impressed-myself moments, I once removed glitter imbedded in super glue from a cultured marble top successfully. I've no proof, but that has teenage girl written all over it.

    Like all the aforementioned mysteries, the cause of the pictured damage remains unknown.

    They're teenagers, not stupid. Developing their instantaneous risk/reward analytical skills will serve them well later in life.

  • PRO
    9 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    "What is that disgusting last picture?"

    A granite countertop over a trash can in a local fast food restaurant taken last week.

    No matter if it was an errant architectural specification, or the owner's wife's selection, it makes the countertop industry look bad. And anything that makes my industry look bad pi$$es me off. Especially when Corian would have laughed at that gunk.

  • 9 years ago

    In the repair business, it's always critical to find out who screwed up
    what, because if a customer screws something up, her standards for an
    acceptable repair are considerably lower than if someone else did it.
    With lowered expectations, your chances of collecting are greater.

    Your posts are always fun.

    These characters,
    almost teenagers, toed the "that's our story and we're sticking to it"
    line to great unpunished success. I can't say I blame them, it worked,
    but as to what they did to cause the damage remains unknown.

    I teach teens, and it's amazing what their parents will believe. Examples:

    - In parent conferences, I've pulled up the computer program to which kids turn in homework ... showed them that their kid turned in only 3 of 10 assignments ... and I've had parents accuse me of deleting the kid's work.

    - I've seen kids cheating on tests, shown the tests to their parents, shown them that the kid copied someone else's work word-for-word, even down to the mispelled words and placement of wording on the paper ... and the parents'll scream that their kid doesn't lie, doesn't cheat.

    - I've heard my principle say he's had kids on camera doing something wrong, and the parents'll say, "No, that's not Johnny" when it's very clearly Johnny on the tape!

    I always think, "Good luck. Raise your kid this way, and you'll get exactly what you deserve."

    If I were building a fast food joint, I'm pretty sure I'd go with stainless steel. That's just disgusting looking.

    Absolutely. These people made a bad, bad choice.

    This was fun to read, but I have a serious question: I lean towards granite countertops ... what choices would lead towards the most sturdy /least likely ever to call upon your Carolina counterparts for repairs?

    I'm thinking that a part of the answer is, Multi-colored and mid-tone, neither white nor too dark.