Tile is loud, more expensive than wood by the time you engineer everything for it, and it’s much harder to find skilled installers. If you want tile, you want tile throughout the house. Not just upstairs. Just upstairs is kinda nuts. That’s not where the wear in a house takes place that tile is appropriate to select for. That’s where you want quiet sound dampening materials, like carpet. Or vinyl.

"...Is it completey necessary to match the second floor flooring with the flooring we use on the steps?..."

No.

"...Is it wrong to Have wood grain tile in bedrooms and upstairs gamerooms?..."

Not wrong. Just a bad decision. Wood is best hard surface. Luxury vinyl plank is a less expensive alternative.

The stairs *should match the "public" area flooring (as in the main living area floors). If the upstairs is for bedrooms and games room, this would be considered "private" (for the homeowners). If the main floor is the "public" area (living room, kitchen, dining, etc) then the stairs going UP should match the main floor flooring. The reason: the stairs are visible to the public and therefore they should match the public area floors.

Now for tiles in the upstairs area. This is not common but it has been done. It takes extra work (and extra materials = extra money) to get this to work over wood-joist construction. The subfloors will have to be assessed for deflection rating. I'll assume they rating isn't good enough for tile (tile is VERY HEAVY and requires very STIFF/thick subfloor). That means you'll need another layer of plywood over top.

That plywood will change the height of the subfloor at the TOP of the stairs...which can mess up the stairs themselves (according to code). And then you have to add the tile which can often add as much as 3/4" height - which can again mess up the top step which messes up the stairs yet again.

And then we get into the "tile is loud" concept. It is extremely loud. It transfers noise "up and down" (from upstairs to down stairs) as well as "wall to wall" (down hallways, into the bedrooms, etc). To deal with the noise and echo, you could be looking at changing the doors to solid core (expensive proposition depending on how many doors you have).

And if you find the noise transfer TOO much (up to down) then you may have to rework the ceiling on the main floor (pull it down, stuff it with acoustic insulation, replace ceiling with acoustic drywall, etc). You can see the $$$$ signs flying out the window.

Please look at the upstairs as a part of the whole home. Ask yourself how big your MAXIMUM budget is (once all the bills are paid = includes labor as well). And then find out if it can handle the "extras" such as new subfloor and possibly a stair case that has to be updated to allow for the extra height at the top of the stairs (rebuilding stairs is one of the most expensive projects in the building industry).

Then make your decision as to whether or not tile on the second floor is a good idea FOR YOU. You are the only one who can answer that question.

" People be all up on mah nuts"

It happens, its a houzz thing

Well, as much as I wanted to match my floors, I ended up with 3 different floors on the main floor, the stairs, and the basement. I really don't notice and it doesn't bother me. However, my stairs are fully enclosed with walls so you only see them when walking up or down.

As far as tile goes upstairs, in our old house we had tile in the upstairs bathrooms and we had to put an extra waterproof underlayment on top of the plywood subfloor. It's not a good idea to install tile directly to plywood.

One other thing: In our new house we installed solid hardwood floors, Luxury Vinyl Planks, and regular ceramic and porcelain tile. The easiest install was the LVP, then the hardwood (which BTW had to be installed over a paper underlayment on top of the plywood) and then the tile. Tile requires a lot more steps (underlayment, floating the tile, grouting, sealing) and is a lot harder to cut and you will need a good tile saw. Something to think about if you are doing this yourselves.

It is pretty normal where I am to have different flooring on main level where common spaces are (often hardwood, laminate, tile, or LVP) and second floor where bedrooms usually are (often carpet). Then on stairs in between between either have hardwood, laminate, or LVP to match first floor, or have carpet that matches second floor. So, I don’t think the stairs have to match - but they should be visually complimentary to the public spaces (main floor area) where they are more visible.

As for tile, I have tile in my second floor laundry room, guest bath, and ensuite. Tiled rooms for second floor rooms like that are common so this sounds more like an aesthetic aversion from some to tile in all rooms versus anything else. I would not put tile on second floor bedrooms, hallway, etc in my climate or for sound reasons (I like carpet for coziness), but I think as long as subfloor is properly prepared for tile, there is nothing wrong with tile for second floor.