No. I came to the US/Oklahoma 4 weeks prior. Had no idea about showers.

Long story made short, we got married and didn't tell anyone. February 28 is my 41st anniversary! I'm just now shopping for an "updated/white gold" anniversary ring, to commermerate the longevity of the relationship and LOVE we still have for one another. :0)

Yes, one of my bridesmaids held one several weeks before the wedding. I've never heard of holding the shower after the event.

I thought about being cute and saying "yes, I took a shower that morning"...

No, we were both already living on our own and didn't need to set up a household. And neither of us desired fancy china, crystal, etc that were so typical of wedding showers in the 80's. And I've never been a social butterfly, lol.

My home only had a bath tub, no shower in our home till 20 years ago. Sorry, lol, but that is where my mind went when seeing the word 'shower'.

As for that other kind of shower, yes, a small one given by my high school friends as I married right out of high school. It was a 'quickie' wedding with only close family in attendance. I still use several things that I was given then...60 years ago. This morning I lovingly ran my hands over one of them, a milk glass pedestal bowl that sits on my bedroom dresser.

Edited to add..... Raye Smith, apparently I was typing while you posted, lol. I couldn't resist the 'taking a shower thing'.

No. We had a small wedding which we paid for ourselves.

Both my sisters had engagement parties. I like that idea better than an all female bridal shower.

Nowadays though I think showers include everyone.

I did not have a shower, and we did not have an engagement party.. We had a very big lavish wedding. I do remember sending out formal engagement announcements and getting some engagement gifts, Most wedding gifts were checks, as I recall, very few actual things. Editing to add, married in 79.

I had a shower hosted by my bridesmaids, There was 40- ish guests in attendance. I have a very large Italian family, so we had 250 guests at the wedding. DH and I will be celebrating 39 years soon :)

Yes, it was in 50's and church always had shower for members. Got lots of sheets, towels, also cast iron pots and pans that I continue to use.

Small engagement party night after proposal/ring, one small shower (future MIL’s bridge club). DD had none. We both hate showers - no baby either.

I had several. My nieces have all had them, with the family, older women invited. But the bachelorette party is most prominent for friends. My new daughter in law did not want a shower at all. I think that was tied to the fact the women on her side are looney.

Haha! I must still be tired because all I could think you were asking about having a personal shower in the bathroom before the wedding. I imagine we all did. :)

No. The first time I was married was in 1970. The wedding had been planned for late Summer 1971, but my mother died at the end of July 1970, and my father died at the beginning of September 1970. (And my future father-in-law had died in April 1970.) One of my future brothers-in-law was to be our best man, but he was in the Army and wouldn't be able to get leave at the time of our wedding. He then found out that he could get a few days off at Christmastime 1970, so we quickly changed plans and were married in my mother-in-law's living room on December 20th. My older sister, my maid of honor, had just had surgery to repair a hernia - she wore shoes for the wedding ceremony then immediately changed into slippers... Anyway, no shower.

When my second (current, and final) husband and I got married, we'd been living together for over four years, so we didn't need anything. We weren't living near any of our siblings (both of his parents were deceased, as well as both of mine). We'll celebrate our 34th wedding anniversary in a few months (39 years together).

No.

I had a shower before I put on my tuxedo. Doe that count? :-p

Yes, I had a shower, hosted by a family friend. No engagement party. Back then, showers were typically a weekday evening after dinner event. Beginning about 6:30 - 7 PM ish and at the home of the hostess. Now, it seems like most are lunch, and Saturdays, often at a venue or in a restaurant banquet room. And not only women. We've recently held a co-ed BBQ wedding 'shower' for a couple who were middle aged. A Home Improvement shower as they had been remodeling her home they planned to live in. The men really enjoyed it and they did get some unique (and practical) gifts...plus a lot of Lowe's gift cards ;0)

We were guests at a co-ed breakfast baby shower right after Christmas for a nephew and his wife. It goes without saying that most of the men had never been to a baby shower but they certainly were willing...

No, I didn't want one either.

Speaking only for me, it felt like such an obvious money grab I wanted no part of it. We were an older couple and already established I didn't want anyone to feel obligated to give us anything.

I think more and more that is how people feel about showers patriceny--especially in this day and age when couples are getting married older and have lived together for quite some time already. They certainly are not needed for the purpose they were once intended!!

Oh, yes. It was expected in our circle in 1964. One was hosted by my future MIL's friends; one by my DM's friends. I still have one or two of the monogrammed towels from MIL's bridge group and a *turquoise* hand mixer from my former piano teacher. The shower was an opportunity for me to meet my MIL's close friends in a small group before the large wedding and reception. I had no say in whether there would be showers or not. They were a social 'given' then.

Yes I had a small shower prior to getting married. My best friend and family organized it.

My first marriage I had 2 - one was family/friends and one was thrown by my co-workers and included a male stripper - which I had never seen before! Had a lot of pictures with my hand over my gaping mouth! It was fun though.

Second marriage - no but some of my co-workers surprised me when we went out for our regular girls night out with some gifts. Very sweet of them. For a second marriage I would've said no to a shower and to wedding gifts (we eloped).

I have never been married and if me and SO ever do decide to make it legal for whatever reason we will NOT have a wedding or a shower. We have been together over 10 years and have lived together most of that time. So the point of a shower would be moot.

I do not like showers and ever since I reached the age where I could refuse I have. I was dragged to them for various family members all through my childhood and teen years. I grinned and beared it when my siblings got married and I was expected to be excited about all the foolishness that surrounds that type of thing. They are so boring. I always send a gift but people still get huffy that I dont want to gather to watch and squeal over an adult opening dull practical presents,play inane,irritating games and eat chicken salad and drink gross punch for 3 hours. I still get invites all the time and I am starting to be a grump about it. Why do you need a bridal shower if people are sending wedding gifts? Why do you want other people to buy things for your baby? You made it, YOU buy it diapers and onesies. And why are you so HUFFY about me not wanting to come if I send a gift anyway? Self proclaimed shower party pooper here. I am no fun at such things.

I never received money or gift cards at my wedding showers. We were just out of high school, 18 and 19 and had little.

Sue

I had a shower organized by my bridesmaids and family. The guests were aunts and cousins from my family and my husband’s. The ladies at my part time job organized a shower at work which was very nice and my small group of college friends got together too to celebrate my upcoming wedding. I think we all got married that summer after college graduation. Thus will be our 48th year married. DH and I met when I was a junior in high school and he a recent graduate. We knew each other 5 years before marrying, but dated almost exclusively during college.

AmyLou, we often disagree but I’m with you 100% in this one!

No shower as there was no time. I met my husband on 9/12/65. Two weeks to the day 9/26/65 we were married. Best decision I ever made.

Nope, we got married in Vegas in one of their little chapels. My DD & SIL flew in from out of state as did my Mom. We all spent a few days together and had a blast. That’s all that we wanted.

First time my co workers gave us one and since it was a very remote location everyone came and we had a party-lots of fun and no sign of a pastel coated almond in sight. No green punch. I was famous for being the Queen of kitchen gadgets and everyone competed for the weirdest one they could find. We all had a great time. They pooled resources for a really good coffee maker. For my second no. We didn't need a thing. I am not a fan of the formal shower.

I had four bridal showers, but all were all pretty modest. Three were family events and one was held by co-workers.

Our neighbor gave me one and I appreciated the kitchen items I was given--not pricey items and we had nothing yet. Neither dd wanted a shower for reasons mentioned above and each tried to keep bachelorette parties cheap-ish and local. Way too much is expected out of brides' friends these days, imo.

I was raised Catholic and married a divorced Baptist with a child. My DM was horrified and would only allow a small (<50 people) wedding which was in a non-denominational church with a JP. She didn’t invite any of her friends. Surprisingly, I had a shower which my DM actually brought me to. Including myself, there were 7 people. We are still happily married after 37 years and my DM grew to love and appreciate the amazing man I married.

I told my maid of honour I didn't want a shower and our invitations said we didn't want wedding gifts, as I was 30 and already married and divorced once and didn't need anything. But she threw me a shower anyway (I figured it out and made it as difficult as possible to go into her backyard giving her every excuse I could think of for staying in the car while she ran in the house to get something before we went "shopping"). And of course every guest at my wedding gave us gifts.

Yes, we did have a shower. We have been married since 1964 and I got so many towels and sheets, I didn't have to buy any for 10 or 15 years. I am still using some of the things we got today, some dishes and a ironing board.

Yes.

DH & I were in our early 20's when we married in '82, and had little of nothing. I think there were 4 or 5. I was embarrassed there were so many. We both attended separate churches, both of them had a shower, his Sunday school class had one too. Then my work had one for us, and then my bridesmaids threw one too. Then there were the wedding gifts. We were quite blessed!

Yes given for me by my bridesmaids. Showers then were smallish, not more than 20 people usually and gifts were practical items like kitchen gadgets, towels, canister sets ,things like that. Like someone else mentioned given in the evening and for ladies only. a few snacks, a few games, gift opening, cake and the ever present sherbet punch spiked well with vodka served at those gathering back then.

We did not have an after-shower. Our wedding was held in a church with a reception after the ceremony. There, our friends 'showered' us with gifts at the cake cutting. After a reasonable time, we newly weds packed a few gifts into our car and left town not to return for several months. We had only a 3 day weekend and I had to be back at my new job on Monday - also my new wife was due at her college on Monday. My wife's parents collected the remaining gifts which we would retrieve at a later time.

This sounds crass and hurried - it was, but, what's missing is a wonderful backstory. We had been engaged more that 2 years. She was attending college and so was I. Her college was in Wisconsin and mine in Illinois. Her parents and church was in Iowa. I had graduated in June and she was to graduate the following year. If I found a job in her college town, we could marry and she would finish her last year as a new wife. I landed a job in her college town; We married on Labor Day weekend. (That's why we had to rush away from the wedding.) We had a 1 day honeymoon before beginning the rigors of her school year and I, working into my new job. She was a preacher's daughter. He performed the wedding for us (nothing like keeping it in the family).

Several years before, her father had come to this church for the express purpose of leading the flock through the process of rejuvenation and construction of a new church building. That's where we met. What's more, ours was the first wedding performed in the new church building. Come this fall, we will have been married for 60 years. Her parents are gone; My parents are gone; Her sister passed away last year; My sister is not well. We are entering our sun-downer years.

Yes I had a wedding shower at a family picnic and a second wedding shower by my future M-I-L in the town where she lived. That was in 1968. When I got married a second time I had a second small shower given by my Aunts at a small family luncheon!

I did in 1967. I don't know how things work now.

Yes,I had a shower before I put on my dress LOL

Yes, my aunt held one for the families. Got all practical things.

No - DH and I were both independent adults with decent jobs when we got married. We did, however, host a party to celebrate the engagement and requested no gifts. Most people abided by our wishes.

We also requested no wedding gifts. Again, most people abided by our wishes. I'd have preferred that everyone had, but some people just couldn't do that.

Nope. The only shower I've had is the one I was given for my third baby.

Yes, we sure did, it was open to both males and females and children. We had it at a large venue in Boston which held the two hundred people who came and it was fantastic. DH and I got up and sang True Love to each other as we had a band, great food and made memories.

Yes and some of the bowls I'm still using today.

We eloped in a state where he had taken a new job. We had no parents, it was 1965, and he was still working his way through graduate school. The few women at work gave me a "shower" when I returned after spring break and gifted me with a place setting of our stainless "silverware."

Actually when I saw the post heading I was going to say..No I took a bath!! I didn't start using the shower till I was much older!

Yes, reluctantly by my future sisters-in-law. I didn't really like any of them, and felt it was a gift beg which was distasteful to me. I've grown to like my sisters-in-law now, 32 years later, but still remember that shower with a shudder.

Not for my first marriage but had a personal shower when I married my last husband....oh my, some of the gifts made that 60 year old blush! 🤣

Nope. We eloped. I'd had my own apartment for years so I had everything I wanted in the way of housewares and stuff. Besides, I hate other people buying me things I don't want or can't use.

Came back from the ceremony and threw a couple of parties for friends and family. Much more fun!