Very interesting post, and I'll bet you generate some good discussion.

I can relate to the hair thing. Everywhere I'm seeing women with long, flowing, slightly curled long hair. For years that's exactly what I had, lightened to an unnatural shade of blonde. I never quite felt like "me" with that hair, though, so as many here already know I began a journey that resulted with a short little pixie cut in my natural color. It's me. Finally. I feel I have "come home" to myself in my physical appearance. I encounter very few women with similar styles, and that only serves to make me more committed and comfortable with my own style. I don't want to look like anyone else at this stage of life, and actually wish I had not tried to do so for so many years.

As applied to my home, well, I've long marched to the beat of my own drum there. I enjoy seeing what others have and are attracted to, but I usually have very specific leanings and know what I want to live with. I have items displayed in my home that would not appeal to the masses, and that's the way I like it.

It's empowering and liberating to know yourself well enough to like your own style. Brava to she who finally arrives there, particularly after decades of not quite embracing it.

I think the beating to A different drummer was a concept that took me a while to get to. I've always known I liked things that were different than the masses but I felt I needed to conform to fit in, it's very liberating to let go of all that and your hair now is gorgeous and it certainly seems to fit your personality beautifully!

The house next door has been flipped to white and greige throughout. Although I’m sure it will sell quickly, that is certainly the exact opposite of what we have here!

I was a little disappointed I didn’t have much gray hair because I wanted to dye my hair pink. I have purchased those Overtone colors you see on Instagram, and I’ve done the pink for brown hair, and I kinda like it! I wish I could do a brighter/lighter pink, but maybe someday. I also bought the rose gold for brown hair but haven’t tried it yet.

You see this a lot on the other side when someone says how can I make my house look beautiful when they've just bought Brown lumpy furniture. They didn't have to buy brown lumpy furniture but they did because that's what all their friends and family and everybody they know has and the stores are filled with it and, course, LOL men like it. Not you Lars :-)

Or I just bought this ugly ranch house, how can I make it nice, I have $100 to spend.

Or "help me find art that matches the bedspread." Some people are still learning and discovering their own style, while some will always hold firm to the idea that they are "supposed to" hang only a certain thing or style of thing on the wall. And that's ok; I mean, those are sometimes the people who are scientifically or mechanically minded, so their aptitudes just lie in different areas.

I do think, though, that there is such joy to be found in feathering the nest in a personal and unique way, and I can't help but feel that those who don't enjoy it are missing out on one of life's simple pleasures ... but I do know that that's just my own bias speaking.

My post is about paint colors, trendy and not trendy.

Every wall in this house, depending on the light, is either gold, dark tan, or greenish khaki. And it’s been by far, out of many, my favorite paint color I’ve ever had. I think there are maybe 6 of us in the USA who revel and thrive in this wall color. I imagine one of us six is at this moment contemplating redoing hers to Agreeable Gray, though. Then will come a thread next door: “How can I make this room feel warmer? Should I add navy or gold pillows to my gray sofa?”

Just teasing, except about my not “in” Lenox Tan. I fought it in my head for a while ... “I need to lighten these rooms up! This is just not cool! No one does gold-tan walls, my gosh!” I’ve found acceptance. I truly love it. It’s so me.

But I also love Jack-In-The-Box tacos and having a couch and love seat, so no one should listen me about anything.

Developing a your personal sense of style requires some effort. Knowing yourself and what suits you is not a given. And there are so many people trying to sell you on their vision, their stuff, that it is so easy to fall into the one size fits all trap.

When I was getting married, before the Web was well developed, I tore out a dozen pictures of wedding dresses I liked and sent them to my mother. She received the manilla envelope and asked me why I sent her a dozen pictures of the same dress. To me, they all looked different. Some had capped sleeves, some long, some with lace, some none. To my mother, they all had the exact same basic shape. I was giving myself no options as far as she could see. Of course she was right. It's like people here, so invested in the look of the day, thinking they are putting their personal stamp on a kitchen by choosing gray pillow shaped subway tile instead of "classic" white.

I always loved beautiful, simple country decor. Not blue or mauve bonneted geese, lol, but lovely Shaker antique type.I could never pull it off, even though I tried at times. Turns out the suburban sheetrock walls were difficult to overcome!

Ocotillo, agree! LOTS of my “sofa, loveseat, chair and 3 matching tables” friends could not believe I would buy this house and be able to overcome the mauve, yellow, blue and dark green paint scheme.

LOL on "Not you, Lars!"

The house next door looks very nice and they did a great job. It's just not what I would want.

I am decorating challenged . . . which is why it would have been easier for me back in the day to just copy the magazine picture or buy all the stuff from the display at the store . . . also I moved constantly and always was living in apartments. I didn't really "decorate" much because carting stuff from place to place was burdensome, so most of my stuff is small and modular . . . however I did become aware of being able to function better in a well designed and organized home or office. Flow, lighting, proportion, negative space, etc. are all very important for that . . .

I was never one of those people who just had the knack for landscaping or decorating. I have several friends who are not trained at all, but just instinctively know how to arrange a space, how to chose and display items, how to use color, how to assemble a clothing "look" that is good . . . me not so much, but I discovered you CAN learn some of the basics and apply them in a whole variety of contexts and spaces. Once i got there, then it was a whole lot easier for me to incorporate my own taste and choices of things I liked. And necessity taught me how to use and incorporate what I had instead of shopping for a whole packaged look. The most difficult thing is FINDING what I envision, since its harder and harder to find nice things in stores or even antique places. Mostly yards and yards of junk. My mom on the other hand, used to make a killing at auctions back in the original Mid Last Century Modern era when no one wanted turn of the century antiques from the previous century . . .

I really enjoyed the book "Use What You Have Decorating" and the old Home Channel shows where they recreated designer looks for less. Some were better than others. Now the trend is all "rip it all out, gut, totally redo . . . "

I've never been one to follow the herd, even in high school when it's harder to buck the trend. I've long thought of myself as unconventional in many ways. I've never really followed any decorating trends - have always just incorporated things I have that have special meaning along with other things I like. Someone mentioned matching artwork to furniture - that thought always reminds me of hotel rooms I've stayed in.

The most I ever learned about home trends took place when we remodeled our kitchen and I became part of the TKO on the Kitchens forum here. I did nothing that was popular at the time and though I've moved out of that house now, the kitchen truly is timeless because it blends seamlessly with the rest of the interior of the house and doesn't have anything that you can target to a particular timeframe. I recently had a chance to talk to second owners to buy it since we left and they raved about the kitchen.

I find there is great freedom and joy in being your own person, having your own thoughts and making your own choices that reflect your experiences, beliefs, values and life circumstances. You avoid a lot of time consuming, meaningless baggage put forth by others. And there is a lot of that with the constant onslaught of social media and obnoxious advertising everywhere you turn. It would be great if more people could come up with an innovative way to make money other than advertising.

As much as I like decorating and always have, I’m not very good at it. The worst thing is I’m fickle. The color scheme I pick today, in six months I’ll be saying “what was I thinking?” It’s either that or I can’t make a decision and end up doing nothing. And while I do have some unique pieces I always feel my rooms look impersonal and more like hotel rooms. Sigh.

ETA: I’ve always worn my hair short or for the last twenty years chin length. With Covid I have not gone to the salon. It is now shoulder length and i’m liking it! I plan to let it grow another 2 -3 inches. Gosh, why didn’t I think to do this sooner? it hasn’t been this long since I was a kid! With it being longer I can maybe I can give up on getting height at the crown I've struggled with my entire adult life.

Bumblebeez, your description of your enjoyment of a simple scrubber, made me smile. Good for you.

For me, the moment came when we were re-doing our home after our house fire. At 50, I realized that I could say "no" to decorating with other people's furniture. I have a hard time saying no and when family would offer (sometimes it felt like it was forced upon us) furniture they didn't want, but wanted kept in the family, I would take it and then try to decorate around it.

When we were moving back in, I stood on the deck as the movers brought our stuff back and said either yes or no, as I wished to pieces coming back in or being taken away. It was so freeing.

When family asked about pieces that were no longer there, I'd just grimace and say, "it didn't make it back after the fire". If they assumed it was gone because it was unsalvageable, I am not responsible.

I reached a point too when I realized I didn't have to use other people's furniture either particularly my mother's, anymore unless I wanted to.

Oooh, that is a pretty dish brush!

I was happy when I found one at Target that wasn't blue and white, and goes better with my kitchen, but yours is a beauty.

Here's mine

I never could jump on the grey train. I think it looks nice, but I already have beige walls and all my stuff looks good with beige and taupe walls. I guess my house will be one of those that looks like a time capsule because I don't update everything every decade to fit with current trends.

I can relate to it in many ways in terms of style, but the lesson was most satisfying in my professional life. I’m what most people describe as “intense” or “serious” at work. In the early years, I could only relate to colleagues and professional contacts through work. Then I made awkward and inconsistent attempts at small talk, which only worsened my discomfort. After a while when my work started making an impression, I felt more at ease and was at liberty to not hide my professional persona of a workhorse good at what they do.

As paradoxical as it may seem, it also loosened me up to socialize a little bit more at work, as I wasn’t trying to hide my true nature, but interacting in a way more true to myself.

All this to say, I realized it’s ok and in someways actually rewarding to be an introvert obsessed with work.

Jinx - I think I'm that one is six! My family does tease me about liking beige and I won't buy a car with black or gray interior either. While I can appreciate how grays can look in other homes when we moved here I picked Ben Moore Wheeling Neutral for the main living spaces and Carrington Beige for our bedroom. The guest room and bath are Nantucket Gray which appears more green than gray. DH's bath is some kind of gray but looks OK with the white fixtures and Mont Blanc marble.

Maybe it was the 12 years of wearing school uniforms but once I started college I branched out. I didn't follow trends probably because I was too busy with school and working part time to pay attention. I'm not an avid decorator, I don't watch HGTV although I loved This Old House - I just kind of do my own thing. When we were first married we rented apartments in the city and lived on hand me down furniture. When we bought our first home we picked a town with a highly rated school system but it took us years to finally furnish the house. DH made a Parson's table for the rarely used dining room until we got around to buying 'real' furniture. Perhaps it's because I'm not talented enough to care all that much about home decor but we buy what we like. I have to admit that the interior decorator we hired to do custom window shades and plantation shutters did comment that he found it refreshing that we hadn't gone gray. It made my day.

daisychain - like you we had a house fire at the end of August and we lost everything. Ten years ago when we redid the house I went with the look of the time - that neutral kitchen and bring in interest through accessories - what a crock. Our new kitchen will have colour and that colour will be on permanent things such as the counter. I missed colour.

And I still have and will again, have a feature wall in the dining room painted a different colour than the others. I know it's not the thing to do but I don't care.

My furniture was an eclectic mix of furniture from my parents, my grandparents and friends of both so that most of our stuff was close to 100 years old. But it is all gone and the one thing that I will have to work on avoiding is having rooms that look like they came out of a picture of a dept store catalogue.

I’ve posted lots of pictures of the interior of my two houses that I’ve actually remodeled and “ decorated “.

I love color and wood and antiques and modern and and and lol! I use family antiques and consignment stuff and lighting from Etsy dealers . A hodgepodge of styles.

Our last house sold to an architect who hadn’t been inside yet but was going by the real estate pictures, which were horrible! He said he loved my eclectic style haha! Wrote me a letter to tell me.

This house is a reuse of mostly what I had before because I‘m way to parsimonious to get rid of anything that is still useful. It’s never occurred to me to decorate with anyone in mind but me and DH.

This is a great thread. I love hearing how others think about this.

edited: @blfenton I am so sorry for your great loss. Have you mentioned the cause of the fire? I hope the rebuilding process is moving along given the weather constraints. c

This is a great thread for sure! Our house is very eclectic. We currently have a round woven outdoor table from Pier I as our living room coffee table. It's chocolate brown & actually kind of works! I have the same table as a coffee table for our outdoor patio furniture. We did repaint our interior rooms & went from an oak gold color we inherited from previous owners in the living room & a deep deep red in dining room to yes, I'll admit it....greige!!! This house has lots of white trim on moldings, crowns, & French doors, so the greige seems to work. Did both LR & DR in that color. However, Trail, our living room would look much better with your new sofa than ours that is grey from Room & Board & very firm!! Wanna trade...hah??

Blfenton, I've thought of you often since hearing about your fire. You definitely don't have to wind up with a department store living space. We still have loads of antiques and eclectic furnishings - I just got to weed out the ones that either had no sentimental value (for me anyways) or didn't fit with my style. I enjoy hunting down unique items, but I know it can be daunting when you are doing it for a whole house. Wishing good finds for you.

It is so liberating when you realize that there is no need to look or try to be just like your neighbor. I always loved boho, free-flowing attire. Think caftans, harem pants, etc. One day, about 15 years ago, a dear friend had a yard sale. I got rid of every single piece of clothing I owned. Since that day, it does not matter if I am going to a wedding or lounging at home, my style is the same and my clothing does not change. If I am at a wedding I will dress up my caftan a little by wearing fancy shoes but really, it is just the same old beautiful caftan I would wear on any other day. Remember Helen Roper from Threes Company? LOL. I like to think I am a little more modern than Mrs. Roper. I lean more towards Frankie. You know, Grace and Frankie. Sometimes I get weird looks, especially from small children and elderly people. It makes me chuckle inside when people stare, and they often do. I think after you take one big plunge, the others are really a ton easier. Really, my clothing is just the tip of the iceberg.

Grey walls and subway tiles would feel as weird to me as wearing a tailored suit or mini skirt. It all looks great on others but it would make me feel like I am decorating/dressing for make-believe.

Jinx, I have SW Bagel in the LR, and while I like it, it takes lousy pictures.

As far as decorating, I've had the same style since I was 18..vintage/antique/country. All because of one bowl that belonged to my late grandmother. Maybe I was the one who started the trend? lol Except I have no words hung on my walls.

I do sometimes fall in love with certain trends but I stay in love long after I purchase them. I still adore a black and white chevron rug I bought in the early 2000s.I love its pattern and it has been so functional for me as well so even though now on the dated list it will stay until it fails to function. I still get joy from my dated red dining room.

I painted with grey before it hit the masses and still love the color. I coveted a wing back velvet headboard in 1995 that I saw in a Martha Stewart magazine and was so happy when in 2009 they hit discount stores and I could get one for less than the thousands they were originally going for. I only fall for trends that speak to me and I still love them long after the trends pass.

I also wear my fashion items until they fail. I know what I think looks good on me. I am a wide flare pant girl or I prefer skirts and dresses. I grew my grey out in 2018 and love my silver strands it almost looks naturally highlighted. Presently it is way too long and when covid lets up I will have it chopped. I stopped wearing makeup when I turned forty except for job interviews and special occasions. It gives me extra time and I feel more myself without it. If I wear it my daughter actually asks me why. As a new teenager she is choosing not to go the makeup route even though her peers have been using it for a year or two. I am happy she is confident enough to realize her own beauty does not need to be enhanced or highlighted.

Bfelton, I am so sorry about your loss.

I am so not a trend follower. I've always loved pale shades, even neutrals with antique wood pieces. The Mr. and I have picked up antique pieces for most of our married life. We are lucky to have a few family pieces. I don't have a particular style; I lean towards eclectic. I love most things cottage and the Mr. is happy to follow along LOL. I will always love shades of blue and green.

Sometimes I actually will not buy something because it is trendy. I prefer unique.

Blfenton, I can't imagine going through something like that. In April of this year a tornado ripped through my yard and I'm still dealing with the devastating loss and probably will be for many many years, at least what I have to look at in the landscape, and I'm grateful my house was mostly untouched although many people lost their homes.

It certainly has made me extremely sympathetic to anybody who has gone through any kind of disaster.

I've always been slightly befuddled by the people who post here wanting to slavishly reproduce the look of an inspiration kitchen. I'm also slightly puzzled by the design folks who expect that they should be able to look at someone's ideabook and know what they are going for. Partly that's because half my ideabooks are full of ideas for other people, or homes that I wish I had but don't, but with respect to my kitchen ideabook it's because the kitchen I wanted wasn't out there to snag a convenient photo from. I had a bunch of inspiration photos, but they were all tagged "hood" or "backsplash" or "color." Not a one what a holistic vision of what I wanted.

And it looks like Jewel tones are finally! making a comeback. I've been waiting for that to happen for years. I'm just tired of grey.

I wonder if the return of colour is a response to covid and so many people having to stay at home and who are now realizing how boring their homes are.

The whole inspiration picture thing is crazy to me. It's like looking at a super model and saying she is your inspiration for the next outfit you want. That doesn't work unless you are six feet tall and a size zero. Houses are the same. You have to buy things that suit them, not a fantasy. By respecting what you have you can enhance it and make the most of it.

I think gray and taupe are so great as a backdrop to a very busy life. But if you haven't a busy life then I think that you want a more vibrant interior.

I am definitely the antithesis of trendy. I do not want to live in a modern style home! That is a problem because I know older Victoria homes need lots and lots of attention but I've always wanted big porches two turrets and beautiful ornate furniture. I will probably never have that in this lifetime but truly enjoy that. And for my kitchen I would want a blue glass countertop on my Island and copper on my other counters with integrated copper sinks. And it goes on and on like that; very not with it!

blfenton, I'm thinking their homes aren't boring to them. I have seen some homes decorated in gray that were very pretty. It's just not my cup of tea. But I imagine my home decor is not for everyone. If you like jewel tones, you should go for them! In style or not.

ETA: (After reading yeonassky's response) Yes! I love color but I also like soothing. My neutrals are the backdrop for touches of color, and of course wood. I love the patina of old wood and to me those pieces are neutral also. There is no wrong or right - it should be what you like.

We had a copper backsplash in the kitchen which was always commented on. My DH kiboshed the copper sinks so I bought a large hammered copper bowl for the counter and then had a blue vase on a buffet nearby. I love that colour combination.

Tina Marie - the problem with the jewel tones is that for the longest time they were really difficult to find in terms of accessories for homes. I had a couple of pillows made in those colours but that gets to be pricey. But you;re right - for me I have learned that I need some colour.

But I promise not to create a room that looks like a clown threw up all over it. I believe that was a visual that I learned from here.

Bf, my son-in-law and his family are having their first Christmas in two years in their rebuilt home after a March 2018 kitchen fire destroyed most of it, the kitchen and back of the house from the fire, and the rest from smoke and water. They've been in there since April 2020. Hubs owned and insured the house and it was pretty rough getting the settlement and the work done. The beginning was rough, getting the insurance company people to show up and do their jobs. Then the end was rough because the pandemic put a halt to construction, even though all that was necessary was just a few finishing touches and the inspection. But it all worked out. Have to detach. The irony was that hubs had just redone the bathroom tub area, kitchen floor, counters and appliances, and resided the house all by himself. The house had to be taken down to the studs, due to the smoke and water damage, and also to meet modern building codes in the 1929 era house. Oh well, we are all safe and well now so as ever, it could have been worse. There were three little kids in several areas of the house at the time of the fire, getting ready for school the next day, and everyone got out safe.

I'm glad everyone got out safe, that's the most important thing. It's still a tough thing to go through and I hope that they are settled in and enjoying their rebuilt home, especially the kids. What an unsettling experience for them.

I’m about to change my interior doorknobs for the third time in about 10 years. From levers to knobs to levers. And I don’t even close my doors. It takes me forever to figure out the first one and then they go fast after that.

Why? I’m tired of pulling on knobs that come off in my hand.

I think when you have the ability to make decisions it's helpful if you can make them correctly.

I know this is hard to do and something I had to learn over many many years so it makes me sad when I see people make really bad decisions such as the new house that went up the road from me; it's about a mile away, but I drive by it every day.

the plainest most cookie cutter house imaginable with the most boring colors ever and the most out of date spindles on the front porch but more importantly they built a small shed maybe 10 ft by 10 ft and a slightly bigger shed about 25 ft by 25 ft and a barn and none of them coordinate in any way whatsoever. That is perplexing to me.

I suppose it's just their taste or the fact that they don't care but these are the kind of people who frequently show up on the other side here wanting to know how they can make everything look better than it is.

My husband is one of those oblivious to appearances and how decorating and organizing might affect your brain. While we were dating, he had his house decorated in the "Gloom" style.