I don't find your counter hideous at all. I've always been partial to textile-look laminates.

But, dark gray is not going to do it any favors (I looked at the Americana Decor website--I assume you were looking at Charcoal Gray). If you can't change the countertop, I'd rethink the color and go for something that plays better with the laminate. Black works better than gray. I like the greens the best (Woodland Green, Moss Green), but thought the counter also worked with the Dark Denim, Rich Chestnut, Dove Beige, Warm White, and Soft Linen (all subject to the countertop color in your photo and the Americana Decor swatches being close to accurate).