The best way to choose is to get some scrap wood (from the cabinets) and test the stains. Take the sample into the room where it will be with the other items (countertop, flooring, etc.). You want your flooring to work with the countertop, so I would choose the tile first, then the stain. They should be able to custom mix a stain for you also.

We planned to choose an LVP product after deciding on the cabinet color. The home is on a lake, with lots of traffic.

I had custom cabinets built and so I chose the exact stain color I wanted.

It was quite an "ordeal" because I would show pictures to the cabinet maker and he would bring back a sample on the wood but it wouldn't be quite right. Ironically I was looking at a chair I had which had variegated stain colors because obviously stain takes to wood a bit differently depending on the grain.

There was a color in the chair that was exactly what I wanted and so he took the chair with him and brought back a miniature of the door I wanted with the stain. I had to initial the door with the stain as "proof" for both of us that this was the stain I had agreed on.

Great idea! Did he customIze the stain for you?
The builder suggested using alder to help with the cost. Given it is such a soft wood, I have heard of people unhappy with it, especially in the kitchen. I also did not like the way the stain samples looked on the alder, many times it was too blotchy. We decided to upgrade to white oak instead

Yes - stain was completely customized as everything was custom. I don't know how he achieved it because all I got was the finished sample to approve.

I wanted white oak rift sawn because my inspiration was vintage kitchens - Prairie and Arts & Crafts and those used rift sawn oak for the furniture and my cabinets are more like furniture than kitchen cabinets in terms of door style.

He also did samples in quarter sawn as well as combinations of rift and quarter sawn :-)

Thank you! I will try another attempt at customizing the color by using an object rather than photos, which have been difficult

I am not sure that the high-end expensive white oak cabinets go with LVP flooring. Also, LVP can be stripey and busy. You will have to choose the LVP carefully for it to go with your white oak cabinets. I think I would choose the flooring first, since the flooring is such a dominant feature in any room, especially the kitchen. Choose the cabinet stain after the flooring is chosen.

Two suggestions for choosing the floor before the stain color. Guess I need to reconsider! Thank you!

We really want the low maintenance and durability of LVP for the scratches and waterproof features. Would LV tile look better?

He has been giving me samples, some of which are minwax colors. What stain products do you recommend? I just started looking at Rubio