I would speak to her management - this is truly wrong on all levels

I live in a small town too. I once received an insurance rant from the front desk at my dental office.

I called the office and spoke to the dentist directly and told him what happened. She was nice as pie the next time I spoke to her.

I also called to complain about a teller. at my local bank. She had a disrespectful attitude.

In your case though, if the manager speaks to her, she will know it is you. Only you can decide if this is worth it.

Going forward though you can request any other sales rep and never use her again.

It's very very unprofessional and inappropriate for a salesperson to speak in that way and I agree that management should be notified.

Sounds very unprofessional.

And

We never know what someone else is going through. Perhaps it was a one off after a really bad day.

I’ll give you an example.

Less than a week after we had to do a wellness check on my BIL to learn he had died, I was required to have an uncomfortable call [vague on purpose]. Needless to say, I was not at my usual level of communication and recollection skills. But my audience didn’t know - or care about - the difference.

I’m an assertive person and would have said something at the time. I only complain up if it’s repetitive or I received personal insults during the communication.

I try to give someone a second chance because you never know the back story of that one rant. If it happens a second time, then I would probably explain to the manager that I felt her behavior was unprofessional.

Jennifer Hogan, I’m not sure I understand. If the company does not accept your insurance why did you hand over your card, and why would you expect partial reimbursement if they did not accept yours? And what is the meaning of “expected to get a partial reimbursement, since insurance rarely covers the full cost of glasses.” It doesn’t matter that ”insurance rarely covers the full cost of glasses.” It was your own insurance in question, not some insurance you’d never used or understood.

Is it at all possible that you precipitated that conversation, unwittingly, by handing over an insurance card you knew did not cover the glasses? If you worked for UHC at the time I assume you were covered by that company. I have friends with UHC insurance and they experienced similar conversations around the time of the murder and capture of the suspect, but not lately.

Her comments were totally unacceptable. I might be inclined to forgive/overlook for all the reasons people have offered here., However,after you gave the reality check and she continued to rant and make comments is when she totally crossed the line .

In my opinion. Yes I would complain.

To clarify, I also agree that the saleperson’s continuing rant was totally unprofessional. However, I also think we have to recognize thst this is a hot button issue— especially now that millions of people will not be able to afford healthcare once their affordable care act sibsidies disappear in 2026. They are frightened and angry; the country is in danger of returning to the elitism of ”haves” with insurance and ”have nots” who face bankruptcy if they are hospitalized. People are fraught… I sing with a woman who recently changed jobs and cannot afford the insurance premium at her new job. She literally prays to God every day that she will not get sick. In this day and age, showing a particular insurance card may elicit a very fraught reaction.

Hm. You found it offensive because you disagreed with her. If she had gone on and on about some hot button issue, but you agreed with her--would her behavior also be interpreted as inappropriate? It's not very smart to talk about certain topics with people when you have no idea of what their outlook or ideology is, but you may not have even noticed if you were on the same page.

And is it really something that you want to get somebody reprimanded about by the owner or even potentially fired?

We live in a culture of complaint and outrage. And a culture of "being disrespected" and one where everyone wants to come out on top in every unpleasant interaction they have.

People say things I disagree with on a regular basis. I try not to give it any space in my head.

(I don't want to get into a one-upmanship sort of situation, but being a member of a minority, I spent a good portion of my life with people either unwittingly or purposely saying things that are offensive. On the other hand, my existence, more or less, offends a lot of people. And there was really nobody for me to complain it about it to. So I have a different perspective than a lot of people.)

I say either let it go, or if it bothers you that much, get your glasses elsewhere even if it's an inconvenience.

I no longer buy from Amaz*n. And I don't have a car to go all over the place looking for things? Extremely inconvenient to not patronize the place that has everything instantly available. And it obviously makes no difference to them. But it was a decision I was willing to make because everything about that place is offensive. And lot's of people in here will disagree. But there you have it.

You already upbraided her in the moment. Taking it further invites punishment. I don't think your experience warrants compromising someone's livelihood

In reading your various posts here, you come across to me as quite frank. Why didn’t you shut it down then? I think @maire_cate statement to get people back on track is smart and useful. I don’t see what you will gain by opening it up again with her a week+ later.

Honestly, i think you made a mistake when you engaged with her after her first comment. Her comment was entirely inappropriate but in this day and age Ive learned to respond something like Hmm, and just move along.

My pet peeve is grocery store checkers who somehow think since you brought your own bags they dont have to pack the groceries. Ive started speaking up or even handing them the bags and just standing there ( rarely). Its the one time I made a complaint to the store manager. Get off your phone and pack the groceries!

I wish my insurance covered glasses and dental work. Boo. Cold blooded murber is not yhe answer, Im also appalled that Luigi Mangione sems to have accrued a following of young girls who think he’s cute.

I shut anyone down who rants. You are not going to change their mind or mine and I do not want to hear about it.

I would of said as soon as she started, that I did NOT want to hear about it! If she kept up, I would have asked for a different person asap. Yes, she or someone close had probably got shafted.

In person, just say I do not care to talk about it. Online, just do not engage.

Ask yourself, Can you help or change anything? If not, disengage.

Remember the Serenity Prayer.

Quite a leap to scary.

It occurs to me that when random people have engaged me on what are, essentially, political matters, it more often than not has become a bonding moment or a feeling of esprit de corps that I in fact appreciate. Like Pal says, if one agrees with the POV, then one sees the interchange in a whole other light (though condoning violence is not a bonding moment for me).

Only rarely has a random someone espoused a view that is different than mine. I just say "I disagree" and make a mental note to steer my business elsewhere.

I had a podiatrist once make several religious comments to me, and at one point he deliberately looked at me for affirmation. I just stared back at him. I was wildly uncomfortable because it was both A - not anything remotely close to my belief structure, and B - shockingly inappropriate coming from a medical professional.

I finished up the appointment and never went back.

It never occurred to me to "report him", to anyone. His care of my foot problem was fine and he seemed competent - my complaint would have been the overt religiosity made me uncomfortable. It's funny though, because I do bet some folks would have loved it/him.

Interesting topic.

In different parts of the country, people are more inclined to go on rants to strangers. When I lived in Chicago, if you told a stranger what was on your mind, they'd look at you like you had four heads. In Philly, any stranger at a bus stop would give you a dissertation about their beliefs on anything from god to politics to the weather.

Like my friend Mel says: Let Them.

Just move on. Make sure you don’t deal with her the next time, if you can help it.

@kendrah, I am so sorry to hear that your health issues were compounded by our ridiculous, shameful system. Surely our country is wealthy enough not to do this to people. My lord.

@Olychick - Interesting point, but honestly, I just don't feel such burdens on a daily basis. Maybe because it is hard for me to separate being a woman from being a white, cis, and wealthy woman? Maybe it is because I read the news instead of watching it?

I used to feel much more oppressed as a woman when I was younger (cat calls, disrespect at work, injustice in my family) and had fewer means (my god, having money changes everything!) Yes, sometimes I feel offended as a woman by comments made around me. But certainly not a on a daily basis, and miles apart from the shoes that my black female friends and trans friends stand in.

Being older changes everything too. (I'm 53.) Sadly, there are benefits to a culture that treats older women as invisible. I got my first truly vulgar and abusive cat call in 8th grade. It stopped in my mid-40s. Such a relief. And I have never lived in a state where my reproductive rights were at risk.

I was wondering about the age of the subject of the OP. Was this a young person, an older person, or somewhere in between? I often feel like our generations have diverged a lot when it comes to etiquette - or the lack thereof. It seems that too many people have very limited social skills.

The young have no monopoly on limited social skills. People who should know better and used to act better now feel empowered to be as rude and crass as their elderly role models. Whoever ot is, young or old, it’s a shame— and a problem of public civility that cannot be mitigated by ”dressing better.”

Well at least she didn't donate $5.00 to the alleged shooter's defense fund like my sister did.

Who knows, maybe she did donate to the defense fund? (Luigi is quite wealthy, I'm surprised he has a fund. I wonder who is pocketing that cash?)

I don't think age plays a role. I know plenty of older people who are quite expressive with their opinions. I find the older my mom gets, the less inhibited she is. Her nickname is Lady because she is truly a lady. But these days, she has been surprising us quite a bit, and has happily told strangers her political views in mini-rants.

What has happened to the OP?

What do you mean? I don't see anything different...

Nothing different, it’s just that she posited this question (dilemma? WWYD?) a few days ago asking for advice and opinions and has received almost 30 considered answers but has not responded. I’m curious what she decided to do, aren’t you?

Not to down play the specific subject of the OPs interaction, but isn't there a larger issue that solves all these subjects. Should people being paid to do a job ever express their personal opinions? The entire interaction was just so unprofessional. I hope the OP filed a complaint with the manager/owner of the shop. At no time is it appropriate for a worker bee to step into the lane where they are talking to a customer about anything other than the weather or the shoppers wants. The sales person crossed the line with the comment about Insurance companies and made it worse by adding the shooting comment. It's all inappropriate! While those two were off track in this discussion who was waiting to be served having to endure this back and forth? At the least it's wasting many people's time! Just do your job people!!

What a wonderfully diverse conversation - never expected so many responses, but I truly appreciate the thoughtful responses that I received and the back and forth discussions.

I didn't add answers along the way because I was truly interested in what others thought and didn't want to interfere with the flow of the conversation.

Calling management was never one of the options that I considered. I am not sure why that felt over the top in this situation, but it did. I considered one of two options - leave it go or talk directly to the sales person and express my discomfort with the conversation.

After reading the responses here I have decided that I will not seek her out, but also will not avoid her. If she happens to help me in the future I will be mentally prepared to stop the conversation before it moves into an unwelcome or uncomfortable space.

Weirdly, I had another situation this weekend where I had zero hesitation with reporting someone for inappropriate behavior and did it immediately. The sales person from Menards Moving was pressuring me to give him my credit card info to secure the price estimate he provided. (On a recorded call.) When I interrupted him and told him that no matter what he said, I was not ready to make a decision and I would not be giving him my credit card number he responded with "FU". (I am not moving - helping to coordinate a move for a senior who has to move to assisted living.)

I think the holidays may be stressing some people or possibly my I am getting old and my expectations regarding customer service are from a bygone day.

I will respond to some of the individual questions and comments between meetings or after my workday.

Again, thank you all for your comments

Ha! I worked an insurance call center for five years and retail for many more. Those experiences are largely responsible for how I still feel about the holidays…

I dont know which shoppe you went to ... but there are two very good Central PA eyeglass shoppes that have unique offerings and excellent customer service.

European Eyewear on Harrisburg Ave .. it used to be called Olde Town Opticians and was on Duke St when I was last there. It isnt a place where you go around and try on 15 frames, they select frames based on your coloring/face shape and prescription and bring them to you. I don't remember if they have the selection that you will find at Higashi (I suspect not) but they surely have distinct designs.

Higashi Eyewear on Market St in Lemoyne on the second floor of the Farmer's Market. Don't be thrown off by the location, there are a number of nice stores on the second level. They carry a wide range of frames-- from pretty basic to completely out there ... including a number of brands you won't see anywhere else in the area. They are incredibly helpful. They have been super support through my many eye issues over the last 10 yr. The owner herself resolved a number of problems I had managing work and life with some unusual issues. She has been life changing. I wouldnt go anywhere else!

@Kswl - The sales person asked to see my card stating that it never hurts to check. I did know it wasn't one of the insurances they accepted, but agreed that it never hurts to check.

As far as coverage - my plan allows you to choose an in-network provider or out-of-network provider. In network providers bill the insurance directly, insurance sends them a check for the covered expenses based on the in-network allowances and you pay the provider the balance due. Out-of-network providers do not bill the insurance directly. You pay the full amount due to the provider and send the receipt to the insurance claims department. Insurance then sends you a check for the covered fees and materials based on the out-of-network allowances.

Next time try zennioptical.com . Frames with lenses start at $6.95 and the quality is excellent.

Thousands of frames available and you can try them on virtually.

My employment is contractual for multiple companies, none of which offer me benefits, and I buy insurance from the marketplace. I have done so for several years, and the process has been transparent and workable. And I've had great healthcare options where I live. But not knowing what changes will take place in 2026 is frustrating, to say the least. I've read horror stories, but cannot get a clear answer on what my premiums and coverage will be. I'm preparing for the worst. I don't condone what happened to the UHC CEO. But, given a family history of self-employment (farming), as well as members who have worked years in jobs they despised just for the health insurance, anyone who complains about the healthcare system in the U.S. has a sympathetic ear from me.

But I also give a pass to anyone who works with customers in general, because I believe empathy is lacking overall in our society. Last week, I went to my bank to deposit a check. I didn't go to the drive-thru because my driver's window had recently acted up. I couldn't get my vehicle in to the mechanic to check it out yet, and I didn't want to be stuck with my driver's window not working in the winter. So, I parked, and went inside the lobby to deposit the check. The teller lanes were all closed--the only teller working was servicing drive-thru customers. So I asked another employee if I could deposit a check. She seemed very put-out and annoyed, and it was about 15 minutes before she helped me. When she finally did, I apologized and explained my situation. Then, she looked at me, sighed, and said, "I'm sorry... I have a migraine. But let me help you." She was a middle-aged minority female working at a bank. I bet she did have a migraine!

Thanks for your reply JH. I do understand about in-network and out-of-network insurance (I worked with insurance providers for about ten years) but glasses are usually an optional add on, not strictly considered medical coverage and therefore in some cases there is no payment at all if the establishment is not in network with one’s insurance. That’s why I asked.

If someone gave me an FU as a rejoinder to my refusal to give my credit card number I would not only report the person but would also give the company a one star review online and state exactly why.

If JH got an eye exam, therefore a prescription-it could be covered under medical if she had other issues like diabetes, glaucoma, even dry eyes-which in most cases puts more money in the pocket of the optometrist. Billing depends on the complaint and coding, in my "not-so-expert" experience. So, it doesn't seem so weird to me, that she was asked for her medical card. I don't know all the specifics, so not sure. And, it doesn't hurt to check, IMO.

She was there to pick up glasses, OJ.

As an aside, wouldn't it be wonderful if insurers were forced to consider our eyeballs, teeth, gums, and mental health as part of our bodies and include them in our medical insurance? At least Obamacare made strides with mental health coverage. More is needed.

@Kendrah: I'll add hearing testing/aids to your list.

Bring it on @maddie260! Indeed, ears should be part of the body too!