Read Consumer Reports, and look for reviews online.

I love Miele dishwashers. I have had one at home for 13 years now, and have never had a problem yet. It is perhaps the "incognito" ??? model, with a full front panel and hidden controls (which was perfect when my kids were toddlers and liked to play with controls). Had a different model at our old cottage too. Liked them so much that we installed 2 more at the new cottage, which are running great after 6 years. All are extremely quiet, I love the tesla rate top cutlery tray (always clean), and usually just use the shortest economy cycle too.

I have never had a Bosch dw, but I do have a washer/dryer set from Bosch, and I can not wait to replace them. Lots of problems, with stalled cycles, tons of wrinkles and knotted clothes in the dryer no natter what cycle I try, and a smelly front loading washer, despite wiping out the door gaskets frequently and leaving the door open to air out the drum.

I'm extremely happy with my Bosch it has all the features you mentioned. It is almost all together quiet in every cycle. I have two in my house which are 40 dBa and one in my Florida house which is 46dBa. Of course the lower the dBa the quieter. Both houses are open concept and with either I find them almost silent. Bosch does not use heat to dry so it's more energy efficient. I find my dishes come clean every time and the glasses are spotless.