I'm constantly dismayed by the under-performance of my collection of rare plants. To keep myself from being daunted by this, I just look at it as a reasonable way to prepare for life's other disappointments (my kids' life choices are still pending, but we have one with 2 years of an expensive technical college now happily working as a house painter; his big brother is still sending home tuition and rent bills, dutifully and cheerfully paid by his ever optimistic parents). If that isn't bad enough, my dog is a breed that's "rare for a reason" and I can't even kick him, to the curb or otherwise.

My list of rare for a reason perennials, shrubs, and trees is too long to list here, but I thought your acanthus was stunning when I saw it, flowers or not I think it makes a great impact in your garden, and everywhere else I've seen it.

Katy, your posts always bring a smile to my face!

I'm often dismayed by the underperformance of some plants, but I always attribute it to *me* not the plant, lol! I figure *I* did something to make it underperform, whether that be lack of water, lack of attention, siting it incorrectly, leaving it in a pot for five years, etc. So I don't let it get to me too badly because I figure if I correct *my* behavior, the plant will correct its behavior. Of course, being the procrastinator that I am, it is not often that I get around to correcting my behavior, and so I live year after year with an underperforming plant, all the while feeling pity for it because it came home with me and not someone else who would have given it a better home.

As far as kids, I think I'm being eased into that disappointment, lol! My oldest, who was reading at a third grade level when she was four years old, (and now, I realize, is STILL reading at a third grade level in high school, lol! - okay, exaggerating slightly here!) is now in her senior year and her dreams of going to Yale have turned into maybe taking a year off before going to a community college. Oh well, I couldn't have afforded Yale anyway!

:)
Dee

The jury is very much still out on my rarest, not in commerce, plant. Supposedly, it's rare for the reason that it likes limy swamps. So when I planted it (after spending about 6 months in a pot), it went into the limy swamp. It did survive the winter. Given my track record on establishing potted plants in the swamp, this is a miracle. Whatever else, it is a true swamp plant. However, it is looking decidedly underfoliated this summer, and I'm not sure why. It may be getting too much shade from the cattails.

As for kids, we are still very much in the When I Grow Up, I want to be a princess-astronaut-veterinarian-mommy stage. Though to be honest, we wouldn't be surprised if the real result isn't something like professional chef.

I am extremely disappointed in hellabores. Everyone sings their accolades for an early blooming plant. Heck, mine hardly survive the winter, and they certainly don't bloom. The evergreen leaves - aren't. They die all the way back in the winter and don't put out greenery until summer has arrrived.

Lupines are another huge disappointment. It seems they grow everywhere, even roadsides, but not in my garden. I have bought several varieties and colors, seeds and potted plants, but not a one of them has bloomed, or even survived the winter. At least they don't stick around to give me false hopes for future flowers!

I have to look back quite a few years for some real disappointment. I stick with more reliable plants now. But foxglove and delphineum were two of mine in the early years of planting my gardens.

We have no children, precisely for that reason and several others.

So sorry about your Bear's Breeches! (What the heck is that anyway? Off to a plant database to find out!)

I won't go into the details, but life has already handed me its share of "disappointments". I'd actually describe them as heart-pulverizing and bone-crushing trauma (literally and figuratively speaking).

In comparison, my gardens never disappoint me. They are a little microcosm of nature and beauty and wildlife and give me so much joy. It is ME that needs to measure up - if I'm patient enough and aware enough and do the right thing, Nature may very well share with me the secrets of the Universe!

It took me several tries with foxglove, so I know that frustration. The "true perennial" foxgloves are easier, but really disappointing; they lack the great colors, height, and wonderful foliage of the biennials but spread much more readily. Those really are rare for a reason.

Bogie, sorry you don't like hellebores! I fell in love at first sight before I even knew what they were, and still love them all, 15 years later. If I could, I'd grow every variety.

I have never had a problem with foxgloves. In fact, next year I will probably be selling them at the roadside as I dig up all the babies!

Delphiniums can be a bit temperamental. The only one I have had real luck with is a stunning purple and blue. It sent up babies from seed (apparently) about 15 feet away from the parents so I can't complain about that.

Here is a link that might be useful: Pic of my Delphinium

I'd have to say I was totally disappointed with rudbeckia (black-eyed susan). I bought a packet of seeds and they germinated well but I think what I got was rudbeckia hirta, not the perennial kind I see in everyone else's flower beds... (the packet only said "rudbeckia") The stems were floppy and required major staking, despite them being in full sun, and although the first 2 weeks of bloom were stunning, after a while they got so raggy-looking that I had to yank them all out. Next time I get rudbeckia I'd have to make sure they're labelled clearly.

If I didn't have a compost pile, I could never stand the disappointments. Now, it is not so much disappointment as re-appointment. That saves my heart if not my pocketbook!

Great point, confounded! Whether removing misbehaving plants from the garden or forgotten gourmet veggie remnants from the fridge, my mantra is "it will make lovely compost!" This takes the sting out of disappointment and regret, at least a little.

Being an avid wintersower, it's hard to be too disappointed with my plants. If something doesn't do well, there's always another seedling to take it's place. I purchase very few, if any plants now unless they are marked way down.
I did pick up a tropical hibiscus for a few dollars, that was marked down more than 75% and a small mexican heather, but that was it for the year.

There is a disappointment though this year. My well established clematis duchess of edinburgh did not make it through the winter. She's been in the gardens now for 6 years and was surprised at the loss. Not giving up yet though, as clematis are known to come back after being, what appears to be dead and gone, after a few years.

I had been waiting for my candylily plants to bloom. Wintersowed them from seeds 3 years ago. Only 1 seedling berminated and the 1 fan had grown to 4 this year. Was going to move them to another location when I had a pleasant surprise. Blooms this year for the first time. Patience is a virtue that gardeners find hard to have sometimes.

Candylily
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My first attempt at growing foxgloves from seed was a great success. I just wintersowed seeds I got from a trade on the exchange page a year ago. They bloomed the second year for the first time and appear to be getting ready to rebloom in a few weeks. I will need to stake them this time.

This was a fushia color though my camera picks it up as a dark lavender
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a very pale pink one

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and a lavender one
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Fran

dtd, just think of Click & Clack from Car Talk. I'll bet their parents were disappointed that they became auto mechanics after going to MIT, but now they have... their own radio show! ...Er, okay, so maybe that's still not so comforting. ;-D

Fran, lovely foxgloves. I'm another one who can't even get them to make it through a winter so I can see them bloom.

Greening, I WS them in 2006. I potted them up into 4 inch pots and kept them in the back yard all summer in the direct sun. End of Sept. they where about 4-5 inches tall and then put them in one of the garden beds for the winter.
Wasn't sure they'd make it with so little snow for protection, but there they where come spring.

Am planning to sow more this year, collected the seeds from each plant and kept them separate. Hope to have them for the spring swap and you are welcome to some of the seedlings.

At least we know these are hardy ones that will survive the winter.

Fran

Nice lily and foxgloves!

For me it's those beautiful hybrid tea roses. I love them, I want them, I spent hours in the gardens in the UK this summer just drinking in their beauty. I have spent good money on them in the past.

But I can't grow them for squat. I don't use any of the chemical fungicides or insecticides, but I've tried different soil amendments, different varieties (sometimes 2 or 3 times; I'm stubborn), different places in my yard - I always lose them to winter kill. Maybe that's a good thing, as I have a regular batch of Japanese beetles each year that chow down on my rugosas and hibiscus syriacus.

So I've come to the conclusion that, unless I move (my hybrid teas grew beautifully in the greater Cleveland area), I will simply be admiring them in other people's gardens. I'm a wintersower, and have enough other flowers to keep me happy.

Kinda - but I sure wish I could do better with hybrid teas!